It's been a month since Harry found out that his secret admirer was a guy, but that didn't stop his secret admirer from sending letters to him.
Dear Harry,
I fucked up, very badly, I know.
I miss you.
Sending these letters were the only way I could talk to you without feeling scared. It made me feel less nervous, much different from how I react around you in person.
I wish I didn't tell you I was a guy. I wish I didn't give you all of those clues.
But I don't wish that I didn't send you that first letter. When we started writing to each other, I felt happy, I started to feel loved, but of course that was a bit far fetched, no one would ever love me.
I wish it didn't have to be like this.
Love,
Your Secret Admirer.
The thing is, Harry truly didn't know what to think. It didn't gross him out that his secret admirer was a guy, he had no problem with it. Harry never really assumed that his secret admirer was a girl, he didn't even think about their gender.
He was just simply confused, with his sexuality. And Malfoy definitely didn't help; the hot git.
Harry thought about asking Seamus or Dean for advice, considering they were the only gay people he knew.
His secret admirer stated that it was completely obvious who they were, but Harry still had no idea.
______
"Hermione," Harry whispered, "Can we talk? It's kind of important."
Currently, they were in the Gryffindor common room, just the two of them. Everyone else was asleep.
Hermione stopped reading her book and looked up at Harry, "Are you okay?"
"My secret admirer is a guy." Harry blurted out.
"I know."
"And- wait what?"
"I said, I know."
Harry blinked, "How?"
"You are so oblivious Harry." She laughed.
"I get told that alot.."
"So what's the problem?"
Harry gulped nervously. He knew he could trust Hermione, and he had no problem with telling her, it was just finding the confidence to say it out loud.
"Harry?"
She's not going to judge you, Harry.
But what if she does judge me?
"Are you okay? You're shaking, Harry."
There is nothing wrong with you liking guys, and it's not your fault if she thinks other wise. You know she will accept you, she always does, so what are you so nervous about?
But what if she doesn't accept me?
"Don't cry, just talk to me."
She's your best friend! She supports you no matter what! You know that!
But what if she doesn't support me? What if she thinks of me differently? What if she thinks i'm disgusting? Weird?
She's not like that Harry.
But what if she is like that?
But she isn't like that, so there is no need to worry.
"Please just talk to me, please stop crying. You can tell me anything."
'You can tell me anything..'
Of course I can tell her anything, she's my best friend.
"I think- I think i'm bisexual." Harry said, with his hands shaking, his heart beating faster than it normally does, his palms sweaty, and tears streaming down his cheeks.
Hermione's face softened, her mouth open slightly, a noticeable look of sadness in her eyes, "Harry.."
"I'm bisexual, and it's who I am, nothing can change that. I didn't choose to be attracted to guys, it's just the way I am. And if you can't accept that then-"
She cut him off by pulling him into a tight warm hug.
Harry let out a happy sigh of relief, and hugged her back; crying into her shoulder.
"Harry, I support you know no matter what. You can tell me anything, I would never judge you, you're my best friend." Hermione said gently.
"Thank you, Hermione." He replied as she wiped the tears off of his face.
_
Dear my secret admirer,
Hello. I apologise for ignoring you, there has been alot on my mind lately.
I don't have a problem with you being a guy. It's not weird, and it's definately not disgusting.
And to answer your question, no, I am not straight.
I am bisexual.
I told Hermione today. She was so supportive, so accepting. I'm so thankful to have a friend like her.
I'm glad I made you feel happy, you made me feel happy too, i'm being completely honest here. These past few months that we have been writing to each other has been probably the happiest months of my life.
So, thank you.
I think you're really cute, the way you write, the way you're so passionate about the way you feel, the fact that you don't bother denying your feelings. It's beautiful.
I hope I made you feel loved, because you are. Many people love you, even of they don't know how to show it.
Give me as many hints as you can. If you feel comfortable with doing so, of course.
I can't wait to figure out who you are.
I bet you're so much cuter in person.
From,
Harry.
-
"Pansy! Pansy!" Draco shouted from his room, a huge smile and a bright red blush on his face.
Pansy rushed into his room, shocked. Draco was smiling; she hadn't seen his real smile in ages.
"He thinks i'm cute! He called me cute! Look!" He said as he handed her the letter.
She smiled as she read the letter. Pansy looked up at Draco, who was now happily jumping up and down on his bed.
"Draco! Get to bed! No one cares about your un-dying love for Potter! WE ARE TRYING TO SLEEP!" Blaise shouted, who was currently in bed, trying his best to get to sleep. But all he could hear was Draco squeeling and fangirling.
"Get married already!" Said Greggory.
"oH mY gOd! dId aNy oF yOu sEe pOtTeRs hAiR tOdAy?¿¿ hE's sO hOt! tHe iDiOt iS tRyiNg tO kiLL mE i sWeAr!!" Vincent said, mocking the exact words that Draco said a couple days ago.
"Fuck off! You bunch of wankers! I fucking care!" Draco hissed.
Pansy laughed.
"Oh, Pansy. I'm so in love."
-
Dear Harry,
I'm not screaming, definately not! That would be so immature of me!
Merlin, Harry. Why do you have to make me feel like such a sap? I demand you to stop! I hate you, I will never forgive you for this.
And stop complimenting me! Seriously, i'm blushing.
Anyways, let's get to the real stuff. Who was your gay awakening? Mine was you, of course.
Here's a clue for you:
I like apples.
A lot.
Specifically green ones.
If you see me eating an apple that's green, then that's probably me.
Love,
Your Secret Admirer.
-
'Who was your gay awakening?'
How the fuck am I meant to respond to that?; Thought Harry, I can't just go 'Oh yeah, Malfoy was my gay awakening, I find him incredibly hot.'
Dear my secret admirer,
You're the cutest person ever, I swear.
No, I will not stop complimenting you, never!
I'd rather not say who my gay awakening was, I mean he's not bad or anything, it's just a little bit unexpected I guess, not that I care about that. He's a slytherin, sassy as fuck, and probably hates me, that's all i'm saying. You probably know who i'm on about.
I will be looking out for someone who eats green apples from now on.
Ps. You don't need alohomora to unlock my heart ;)
From,
Harry.
-
"Are you going to eat the rest of your chicken?" Ron asked curiously.
"No, you can have it." Harry replied.
Harry's eyes scanned everyone in the great hall, looking for a certain someone.
'I like apples. Alot. Specifically green ones. If you see me eating an apple that's green, then that's probably me.'
At first he scanned the Gryffindor table, but no one was eating apples.
Second, he looked over at the Hufflepuff table. There were two people eating apples, they were both guys, but their apples weren't green.
Third, he examined the Ravenclaw table, but the only person eating an apple was Luna.
At last, he checked the Slytherin table. No one was eating an apple except from- Draco?
Wait- when did Malfoy become Draco?
Probably since you realised that you have a raging crush on him, dumbass.
I don't have a crush on Draco.
Yes you do.
No I don't.
Yes.
No.
Yes.
No.
Yes.
Okay fine, maybe I have a crush on him.
Harry looked at Draco longingly, his heart beating fast.
Draco was eating an apple.
A green apple.
Could Draco be my secret admirer?
No, of course he's not. He would never be interested in me that way.
He probably likes Hermione; Harry thought, remembering how they acted around each other a couple weeks ago.
Draco felt someone's gaze on him, and looked up to realise that Harry was staring at him.
"Pansy!" He hissed while poking her arm, trying to get her attention, "He's staring at me! Do you think he knows? What should I do? Just awkwardly stare back like I usually do?"
Pansy rolled her eyes and gave him the 'Why are you like this' look, "Just smile at him or something, but try not to be creepy."
Smile?¿¿!!" Is she kidding mEe?¿¡¡!
He turned back to look at Harry, who was still staring at him, and tried his best to give Harry his non- creepiest smile.
Harry blinked and looked down at the floor, blushing and smiling to himself.
I change my mind; Harry thought, I definately have a crush on him.
_