"I'm not perfect. I'm original."
MAYA
Monday morning, I parked my Harley in the parking lot outside of EverGreen High, and Cayden got off the bike first. The engine died and I shoved the keys in my pocket before pulling off my helmet. I pushed my hair behind my shoulders and glanced at Cayden.
He wore matte black jeans, a gray t-shirt, hugging on all the right parts of his well-defined muscles, and his jean jacket. He had already taken off his helmet and slung his backpack over his shoulder. His ran a trembling hand through his newly cut hair and chewed on his bottom lip, nervously. The anxiousness had flushed his cheeks bright pink.
I swung my leg over the bike so it rested beside my other leg, and I could sit facing Cayden properly. I reached my hand out for his and tugged him closer towards me. "Hey. What is it? Are you okay?"
Cayden didn't say anything. Instead, he averted his gaze down to the ground, fist tightened around his backpack strap.
"People are going to stare," he muttered, gesturing to our hands entwined. "I hate attention. I hate it."
I knew it. Cayden didn't care about what people would say about us. He didn't care about how scared people would be of him after what happened between him and Nathan. Cayden didn't care about what other people thought of him at all. It was all the stares and unwanted attention that gave him anxiety.
He reached his free hand up to his neck to pull his hood over his head, but when his fingertips grazed over the material of his t-shirt's collar, his expression faltered.
He wasn't wearing a hoodie today.
No hoodie equaled no shield.
Shit.
That was practically Code Red for Cayden.
Before anxiety and panic could storm down on him like an avalanche, I pulled Cayden closer towards me and squeezed his both hands in mine.
"Hey, don't worry. Calm down. It's okay. You're okay," I assured, meekly.
Cayden tried to calm down but instead, he ended up frowning deeply and his face paled. His gray eyes were pooled with immense anxiety, causing his fingertips to tremble between my palms.
"Cayden. Hey," I whispered, putting my hands on his waist and drawing him closer to me. "Take a deep breath."
For a moment, Cayden silently stared down at me but eventually inhaled a deep breath, held it, and exhaled. He repeated this four times before his tensed shoulders sagged and he dropped his forehead on mine, lacing his hands together around the back of my head.
I smiled when the agitation slowly dissolved from his face and relaxation took form. His clenched jaw stopped moving. He closed his eyes for a small moment before opening them and drawing his head back a little to properly lock eyes with me.
"Thanks," he murmured.
Hands still on both sides of his waist, I grazed my thumb against the right side. I could feel his skin beneath the material of his shirt. Cayden's cheeks flushed bright pink by the small gesture. He offered me an easy, but slightly wobbly smile.
"If you don't want to holds when we go inside, I'm perfectly fine with it. Really, I don't mind," I said.
Cayden's mouth twitched as he was about to say something, but instead, the unexpected realization took birth across his face and he groaned.
I frowned. "What is it?"
"You're doing it again."
"Doing what?"
"Only caring about what I want. Not what you want."
Oh.
Cayden sighed and cupped my cheeks. "Maya, I don't want our relationship to be one-sided or based on what other people want from us. I don't want you to have the same relationship you had with Nathan all over again."
I almost snorted. What I had with Nathan couldn't even be called a relationship. It was just him and I standing in front of each other with the whole goddamn town squeezed in between us. With Cayden, there was nothing standing between us. It was just the two of us. I loved that.
"I don't want that either, but Cayden, I'm working on it. I might slip sometimes as I did right now, but I know I'm going in the right direction," I confessed. And I was actually really proud of myself.
He smiled. "I know and I'm proud of you."
"Thanks. I'm proud of you too."
Cayden's brows pinched together, eyes narrowing. "Proud of me? For what?"
I tugged him even closer, now wrapping my arms around his waist. "That you've decided to be in a relationship. I know it's a huge step for you because you don't want your mental health to ruin it, but you're brave enough to give it a try and I'm really proud of you for that."
Slowly, but then all at once, a genuine smile stretched across Cayden's lips and he stroked my cheek, tenderly. Subconsciously, I leaned into his touch as warmth tingled through me.
"I'm not gonna compare what I had with Nathan and what I have with you, but I just really want to say that the biggest difference between being in a relationship with you compared to being with him, is that we can talk like this. I mean, it has only been one day, but I really like that we can just talk about what we are comfortable with and not comfortable with. Decide and settle on agreements together instead of letting the people around us decide for us," I confessed, truthfully.
Smiling brightly, Cayden nodded in agreement. "Yeah. I like that too."
He laced his hands around the back of my neck again and cleared his throat. "Okay, so let's settle on something we're both comfortable with."
I bit my lip in my thought. Cayden's eyes rolled back as his mind raced to find an idea.
And then it hit me. "Oh, I know! We don't have to hold hands and walk through the whole hallway with everyone staring at us. We can hold hands once we've reached our locker. I know it's not a huge difference, but it's better than doing a whole hand-holding catwalk-" Cayden cut me off by pressing his lips against mine.
I was surprised at first, but eventually, I closed my eyes, leaned in, and kissed him back. His soft breath filled my mouth and I felt his warmth radiate to me and settle over my bones.
"That's a great idea," he said, resting his forehead on mine.
Suddenly, I had the unexpected urge to laugh, so I did. Cayden went from grinning to laughing too. In the end, we both looked like two lovestruck idiots laughing in a slightly crowded parking lot.
Students were disappearing one by one and group by group, and into the school's main entrance. However, I stayed on my bike with my hands on Cayden's waist and his folded together around the back of my neck.
It looked to be a good day. The mid-March sun was heating up the town and kissed our skin warm. The sky was a vivid blue color decorated messily with big, soft clouds. Summer was just around the corner.
As we started making our way towards the main doors to the school building, Cayden glanced at me, nervously. "Should I take your backpack? I should take your backpack."
Something in between a laugh and a giggle escaped my lips and I stood on my tiptoes to peck his cheek. "You're so cute."
The tip of his ears turned pink.
I gave him my backpack, which he slung over his free shoulder. We looked like two awkward, nerve-wracked, anxiety driven teens when we walked through the school's hallway and towards our locker.
Screw the hand-holding thing. People were still staring. I had a feeling it wasn't because Cayden was carrying my backpack. It took me a moment to realize that the eyes weren't on me. They were all on Cayden. Cayden Bloom, the bad boy who punched the town's golden king till he could barely stand.
Cayden didn't even look intimidating today. He had cut his hair. He wasn't wearing a hoodie. He wasn't throwing icy cold scowls at everyone who locked eyes with him. Instead, his shoulders were tensed, his cheeks were flushed bright red, and his hands were fidgeting on our backpack straps. He looked like a third grader shyly marching towards the sandbox to ask the girl he really liked if he could play with her.
Last time I checked, that was what we called cuteness overload, not Hitler about to assassinate you.
Sadly, the shitty people in this town had the same old shitty judgments about people. No matter how hard people tried to change and wanted to be accepted by their new image, they failed because this town didn't let them change. Once you chose who you wanted to be and what you wanted to be looked at as, there was no going back or changing it.
I was trying though. Bree was trying. Cayden was trying. The only thing we could do was to try because at least a few people accepted the new us. Luckily, it did count for something. It really did.
I was snapped out of my thoughts when I suddenly felt a familiar pinkie brush against mine before the whole hand grabbed mine. Our fingers were entwined, palms pressed together.
My head snapped up to Cayden standing next to me with his cheeks growing a deeper shade or red. He got the combination right and opened our locker, his back against all the students.
The second people started noticing our hands laced together, some looked really happy, and a few girls even squealed. However, many started whispering, some jaws dropped, judgmental scowls were thrown our way and a few people even looked intimidated.
Too bad we didn't care about any of it.
Actually, I was about to explode of happiness. The guy I liked was fully holding my hand in front of everyone. Admittedly, I kind of died a little on the inside.
"Doesn't it feel good to not care?" Cayden mumbled as we stopped before our locker.
It felt so good to not care. Thus, I beamed at him. "It does. It really does."
I grinned bigger when Cayden's eyes grew wide by the sight of all his books back where they belonged. Inside our locker.
Astonished, he rapidly glanced at me who was smiling triumphantly at him. Giving my hand a small squeeze, a boyish smile appeared on his face that did wonders to his lovely face.
"Thanks for putting them back."
"You're welcome."
I reached for my Spanish books first, but before Cayden could get his books, we were interrupted by an all too feminine, dramatic and cheerful voice ringing through the hallway.
"My babies!"
Cayden and my head snapped around to where Bree was sprinting towards us through the hallway in such a quick pace that it literally looked like she was flying. She jumped straight into Cayden's arms, hugging him with her legs wrapped around his waist and arms around his neck. Precisely, she looked like a koala hugging a tree.
"Woah." Cayden stumbled two steps backwards, his free hand flying up to her back.
"You're back! I love you! I'm so happy for you!" She exclaimed, wholeheartedly.
Cayden laughed at the sound of that.
And then she drew back, jumped down, straightened her cheerleader top and skirt, tightened her ponytail, put one hand on her hip, jammed a manicured nail in the center of his chest, and tilted her face up to give him the most threatening and murderous scowl I had ever seen. "Don't you dare hurt her."
Genuinely intimidated, Cayden's held his hands up and nodded twice, quickly.
I burst out laughing.
Afterward, Bree turned to me and suddenly her face started to shine brighter than the sun just like it had done when she sprinted to hug Cayden.
"Come here, babe," she said before hugging me tightly. "I'm so happy for you."
I wrapped my arms around her and buried my head in the crook of her neck. "Thank you."
After we broke the hug, Bree took a step back to take in Cayden's appearance from head to toe. Her face gleamed with amusement.
"I love the glow up, Cay-Cay. I mean, the haircut, new t-shirt, the blush on your cheeks, and your girlfriend. Looks aesthetically pleasing, buddy," she said, gesturing at the whole him with me on his side.
Then she shifted her gaze to me and smiled widely. "You too, M. You look cuter and happier today. Actually, you're glowing."
I glanced down at my black shorts, white top tucked inside the waistband and blue denim jacket. No makeup, but a thin layer of strawberry red lipgloss. I guess I had put in a little extra effort this morning before I picked up Cayden at his house.
I think he and I both had put in effort in front of the mirror this morning. The thought made my heart dance.
I returned the smile. "Thanks, B."
The bell rang and the hallway erupted to chaos as students scurried to their respective classrooms.
While Bree walked ahead to her locker, Cayden got his books out and closed our locker before giving me my backpack. He watched me slung it over my shoulder and bit his lip as if debating over a question lingering in his head.
Flustered, he scratched the back of his head. "Um, should I walk you to class?"
A smile instantly tugged on my lips, but I meekly shook my head in reply. "It's okay. I have Spanish with Bree. I'll go with her."
Cayden nodded and tugged at his backpack strap. I suddenly frowned because we didn't have any classes together, except for P.E which I wasn't going to start attending before next week. I had to wait until lunch to see him again.
"M, you coming? Say goodbye to your boi already!" Bree shouted a few feet away as she lingered behind a few cheerleaders in the crowded hallway to wait for me.
I nodded and glanced back at Cayden, giving him a smile as I took a step back, my hand slipping free of his. "I'll see you at lunch?"
Cayden nodded, and I turned around to leave. I didn't get far though. Only two steps before Cayden grasped my arm, startling me. I turned around and without warning, he put his hand on my waist and pulled me towards him, covering my mouth with his. In public. In front of everyone.
Frozen, I almost dropped my books because of the immense shock flooding through me.
I managed to kiss him back only for a second before he pulled away and licked his slightly red gloss covered lips. I had to resist the strong urge to grab his face and pull his mouth back to mine again.
"See you later," he said with a small voice and cheeks cherry red.
When he walked away in his own calm and careless stride, I felt like ripping a locker door open and screaming inside it. That's how much happiness I had caged inside of me, ready to burst out.
I turned around to Bree who was waiting a few feet away, grinning brightly at me. Face heated up, I jogged over to her, letting her loop her arm around my shoulders. Clutching my books against my chest in hope to calm down the rapid racing of my heart, I buried my face against the crook of her arm.
"Bree, I really-"
"-Yeah, I know, I know. You love your kitten."
I couldn't have said it any better myself.
****
Author's note: Hi, friends!
I hope you liked this chapter. I really want Mayden's relationship to be based more on verbal communication than lust, attraction and expectations like Maya and Nathan's was. I want them to be comfortable with each other, so I hope this was a good start on Mayden's relationship.
What do you guys think?
There will be another group session in the next chapter. Who is left to tell their story?
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