Chapter 2: Goodbyes
Felicia looks around awkwardly, not sure what to do since no one is heading up to the stage.
"Alexandra Cade?" She calls again, hesitantly this time.
I shake my head, the mass of bodies around me quickly parting to give me a path to the isle separating the boys and the girls. I walk with my head down, afraid to make eye-contact with anyone, especially Xavier. I trip up the steps on the stage, Ryder steadying me at the top. I blush deeply, gave a small smile, and go to stand on the other side of Felicia.
"Well! Everyone let's give a round of applause to our District 11 Tributes for this year's Hunger Games!" Felicia cheers, clapping her hands. As many Districts are given credit for, not a citizen claps. The only ones with a slight smile on their faces and clapping are the Peacekeepers, and Felicia Perdita herself. The two Victors our District had-one being a very elderly man, about 83 years old (a tribute in one of the first few Hunger Games), the other also a man, around 28 years old- remain sitting and staring straight ahead, seeing nothing, showing no emotion whatsoever. It's got to be hard to have to try and train two kids every year to go fight to the death, and year after year, every one of them coming back in body bags.
"Now, shake hands you two!" Felicia says brightly, and as Ryder and I shake hands, his strong grip in mine, I feel my hopes dropping ever faster at the chance of me being the Victor of The Hunger Games.
I find myself being whisked away, into the big doors of the Justice Building. I'd never been inside the building before, and it isn't what I thought it would be. At first, the inside is nice. Then, I find myself being led up a dark stone staircase, pictures of President Snow in all his glory scattered every few feet. I don't find myself marveling at the pictures that I'm sure they were put up there for. I just find it creepy.
I am put in an empty room immediately to the left of the top of the staircase. I listen as Ryder is taken a few doors down, and hear the clunk of his door being shut behind him.
I wait.
Now is the time for the final goodbyes. I wait for what seems like hours for my family to come through those doors. Finally, I hear a knock, and I see Marco running through the door into my arms. I doubt he knows exactly what is going to become of me, but he is old enough to know it isn't good. I can tell he had been crying, and it is a wonder he has any tears left to cry, but cry he does. I stroke his head, calming him the best I could.
"Alex..." Trevor whispers. "You can't leave! You can't leave like Momma did! Please Alex! Don't go!" he finishes, running up to me and hugging the side Marco isn't straddled on.
I hug him back, and try my hardest to keep the tears from flowing. "I have to go, Trevor. I don't have a choice." I tell him gently.
"You have to come back, Alex. Promise me you'll try your best to win!" Trevor whimpers.
"I swear it. Of course I do. I'll be back before you know it." I whisper, wanting to believe it myself.
Trevor is smart enough and old enough to know that the chances of my coming back were small. But he wants to believe it just as much as I do, maybe even more.
Father comes up to me, all hope gone from his eyes- if there had been any in the first place. He kisses my head, tells me he loves me, to try my best, and pries Marco off of me. Marco lays his head on Father's chest, but continues to look at me. Then Xavier comes up to me.
"I shouldn't have let you put your name in all those extra times all these years." He says, pain showing clearly in his face and in his voice.
"Don't be stupid. They need you more than they need me." I tell him.
"Alexandra. You are the closest thing Trevor and Marco have to Mom. Dad and I don't have a chance of doing the right thing every time like you do. All I do is bring in a few extra coins every once in a while. You have to come back- they need you." He pauses. "I need you. I need my sister."
I swallow. "There's nothing we can do about it now. I'm swore I'm going to try my best, and I will. Just..." I break off.
"Just what?" Xavier asks hurriedly, knowing our time together has to be coming to an end.
"When... If they are even close to killing me, don't let them watch. Please." I whisper.
"Don't think like that." His voice is hard.
"But I have to! Just promise me!" I yell at him.
"Fine! I promise."
"Thank you." I mumble.
"It's worse, you know." Xavier says suddenly.
"What?" I ask, confused.
"People have asked me if it would be like watching myself in that arena, if your name was ever drawn. I've decided it's worse. I'd rather it be me. Anything is better than watching my sister fight for her life." Xavier tells me.
A guard knocks, letting us know we only have a minute left.
"And the thought of my brother in there never made me feel any better." I reply.
Xavier hugs me tight, and I tell all of them I love them. The seconds ticking by, I throw out my last requests.
"Don't enter your name any more than you have to." I tell Xavier quickly. "It's not worth it. And don't ever let Trevor or Marco enter their names for tesserae!" I scream, as a group of men come in to take my family away from me.
"I won't!" Xavier yells back, through all the screaming and crying of our brothers. "You can win this, Alex! I know you can! Just-" And the rest is cut off by the slamming of the door.
I cry then, not caring if anyone comes in and sees me. I'm not expecting anyone, anyway. I don't have any close friends. My personality after Mother had died drove them all away. I didn't care. So when another knock at the door comes, I don't even bother looking up, expecting only a guard to come and take me away.
I hear the door close softly behind someone, and only then do I look up. Who I see surprises me.
"Hello, Alexandra." Mr. Barry, Ryder's father, greets me.
"Hello." I mumble, surprised.
He clears his throat, obviously uncomfortable. "Xavier found me in the hall. They told him he couldn't come back in to give this to you, but since I hadn't seen you, I could." Mr. Barry says, holding out a steel ring.
I blink a few times, wondering if I am really seeing what I think I am. Xavier's ring, the one engraved with his name, sits in the palm of Mr. Barry's hand. I slowly stand up and walk over, taking the ring from him.
"Thank you." I tell him.
"Don't mention it." He says as he turns away and opens the door. "And... Good luck out there."
I don't have time to thank him or anything, because he quickly ducks out the door. I sit back down, staring at the ring in my hand. I slip it onto my ring finger, it fitting perfectly as if it was Xavier's hand itself. I think back to when he got it. When we got them, actually. They were a gift from Mother- Xavier's dark steel band with his name carved into it, mine identical, except it had my name carved into it, with two tiny diamonds on either side. I had had to sell mine, after Mother died. Because of the diamonds, it was worth way more than Xavier's and after her death, Father had been barely working, which left us needing the money badly. Xavier knew it killed me to sell it, but I had showed little or no emotion. I had had to do what I had to do.
I'd never seen Xavier without the ring on. It was the only thing he had to remind him of Mother, and I can't believe he'd given it to me as the token I am allowed to take into the arena. I just hope he will get it back if I die.
Two quick raps sound on my door, and I twist the ring on my hand, waiting for them to come in. I am standing when they enter, and I am led away and put into a car, heading towards the train that will take me to the Capitol, and away from District 11. I know I am coming back sooner or later; the question is if I will be dead or alive.