*From Brisa's perspective*
The coldness that had inclosed me had vanished and warmth had taken its place. Peace was something that didn't come to me often after my reaping but at that moment every sliver of fear had disappeared. It only lasted for mere minutes. As the light from the windows came crashing in on my face I desperately tried to grab the shred of peace that was still remaining. But I soon found out there was none left. Fear had taken its place. I squeezed my eyes tight. The morning was coming. At exactly 10:00 a.m. I would be in the arena. The whole night consisted of falling asleep and 10 minutes later waking up panicked. I felt bad because I knew I kept Rowan up. I tried to get him to go, but he wouldn't leave me. I was glad that he stayed because he comforted me, and he made me feel safe, but it wouldn't last for long. I wouldn't have him forever. We wouldn't see each other again until the beginning of the games, and even at that point, we weren't promised survival. I felt the coldness coming back. It snuck into me before I could stop it. The overwhelming fear and panic that the cold inflicted, haunted me. The fear that filled me was indescribable.
Muffled voices were talking from behind me. If was hard making them out but I got bits and pieces of the conversation as I was slowly ripped from rest.
"Why are they sleeping in here?"
"Do you think they are okay?"
"Someone needs to wake these kids up..they will have to leave in an hour.."
I felt pressure on my shoulder. Someone was trying to wake me up. I refused and closed my eyes tighter trying to ignore them. I didn't want to face the world, the games, the tributes, the deaths. I pushed them away forcing myself to stay in the pit of sleep.
That's when a cool, wet sensation ran across my head and down my shoulders. A chill ran up my spine, sending waves of panic across my body. I finally gave in and opened my eyes. I was soaking wet. Rowan was beside me with the same confused expression. We both had our hands out in front of us, and our sleeves were dripping down on the floor. My mouth was wide open in shock and confusion. I flipped around to see who had caused this. I found Damon holding an empty bucket with a blank facial expression.
"Sorry sugar cube you wouldn't wake up....but seriously a couch...can you not sleep in a bed?"
I rubbed my head that had begun to throb.
"Well at least we know you won't have trouble sleeping in the arena.."
If only Aideen was right. There was no way I could sleep while surrounded by people trying to kill me. I could barely sleep in a normal place much less in the games.
Damon walked into the other room.
Vivica was shaking her head in disapproval.
"You two look horrible..."
"Maybe we wouldn't look so bad if Damon hadn't showered us in water.."
Rowan said with a tone of annoyance and humor.
"I don't think our looks will matter when we are fighting for life or death..."
I replied more flatly than I intended, but it did make Vivica keep quiet. Usually it wasn't too hard to keep my composure when she said things like that, but today I couldn't.
Damon walked back into the room and threw a towel at Rowan and laid one over my head. I pulled it off and started drying myself.
"Anyway! We have presents for you two!"
Vivica said in an enthusiastic voice. Me and Rowan looked at each other confused, but then curiosity won over and we followed her. There was five tiny boxes on a table, in the room she had taken us to. They were all sitting in a straight line.
"We all wanted to get you two something for the arena from us...so when we aren't there these can show you that your not alone.."
Damon nodded his head.
"I couldn't have said it better myself..."
Vivica grabbed the first box. She thrust her hand towards me excitedly and I grabbed it. I took off the lid to reveal a small bead in a cushion of paper. It was colorful and oddly shaped. It reminded me of Vivica and her crazy colors and intricate fashions. It was almost like part of her was in the bead, like the bead represented her. She was fun, happy, different, colorful, and eccentric.
"I wanted to get you a bead for your bracelet....Brisa...you have been such an amazing tribute...and for a new bee like me it means the world...I look up to you for everything you are...and I'm going to miss you so much..."
She pulled me into a hug.
"When your in the arena make sure to hold your chin up....for me?"
I nodded. I almost felt a tear trying to fall down my face. I would miss all of my mentors. Vivica had worked so hard for me and it would be hard to see her go, even though she said things that I didn't agree with I still had grown close to her.
Next was Aideen. She grabbed the next box, and handed it to me. Her face was clear of emotion, which was no different than usual. She had a soldier-like personality. She didn't show her emotions or feelings, and she was usually always serious. I opened it to find another bead but it was absent of color. It was solid black.
"I'm sorry mine isn't as happy as Vivica's....but I wanted to make a point.... I need you to be tough....and I know it's a hard task but you have to try...you can't let the people out there push you around...when it comes to your life you will fight until the end understand?"
I nodded my head not knowing what to say. She had gone into sargent mode, where she ordered her soldiers around, but I didn't have anything to say to express my gratitude.
I pulled her into a hug.
"Thank you."
I replied in a soft voice. It almost seemed that Aideen could be upset about us leaving, like maybe her inner emotions were starting to come out. She pulled out of the hug and regained her blank expression. Somewhere behind the wall was piles of feelings, fears, and emotions. Thinking about it almost made me be able to relate to her more.
Adeline had been standing beside Damon. Her eyes were fixed on the ground with a expression of despair. She looked up at me. Her pale blue eyes were filled with tears. I never knew that we meant so much to her. She usually just sat and stared, I thought she had given up on us. Maybe I was wrong and maybe she did actually care.
She walked over grabbing the third box. Instead of handing it to me she opened it herself. She gently picked up a small round bead. She placed it in my hand. It was covered in small pink flowers.
I found myself wanting her to speak. I wanted to know why she chose the bead and what it meant.
She slowly walked towards me. I bent over so we would be at eye level and she grabbed my arms pulling her mouth to my ear. She whispered something that I barely made out.
"Be gentle with them..they don't know what they are doing..."
I was awestruck, she had spoken. She had thought I was worthy enough to speak to. If she thought I was hopeless she wouldn't have said anything but instead she gave me advice. I infused her words into my memory. I knew she must have been wise. Those who listen more than talk seem to become wiser than most others. I learned this concept when I was younger. My dad was one that always listened. When people would be ranting or arguing he would just focus on what they were saying, and he was one of the smartest people I knew.
"Thank you.."
I replied to Adeline. She nodded her head, and slowly stepped back into her place. Before I had time to place the beads on my bracelet Damon broke in.
"My turn."
Damon stepped forward and grabbed the fourth box. He took off the lid and placed the bottom half of the box in my hands. Inside was a small shiny, silver cube.
I was confused. What did a cube have to do with anything?
"It's a sugar cube."
He gave me a sad but sweet smile. His words, smile, and kindness had reminded me of how much I would miss him. He had been my first friend away from home, and he had always watched out for me. I never had an older brother, but if I did I think he would have been like Damon. The three other goodbyes hurt but this was heartbreaking. That was the goodbye that really brought into perspective what was about to happen. Damon pulled me into his arms where I started shaking. The overwhelming fear started to fill me again.
"Brisa....I will be watching you from the capitol...I will help filter your sponsor gifts okay?-...."
I nodded my head even though he couldn't see it.
"-just please...make sure you know where your priorities lie."
I pulled out of the hug.
"I do."
"Be careful sugarcube.."
I wanted to cry but restrained because I knew it wouldn't help anything. Crying wouldn't stop everything from happening. It wouldn't stop the games, the goodbyes, the deaths, and the loss, besides it would just blur my vision, and I needed to have full view of the road in front of me.
I noticed that I had the four charms in my hand. The cold metal was soothing to my wounded hands. They had healed a tremendous amount but they were at risk of infection. If the sores ripped open in the arena it could get infected and that could lead to death. Damon had given me a run through about care and how to clean them, but there would only be so much I could do. I made it one of my many goals to consciously remember to protect them.
I pulled off my charm bracelet and slipped on the four new charms right next to my others. Each person had given me a task and I had just added four more.
Vivica grabbed the fifth box and opened it up. She pulled out a long chain, it had a charm on it. It looked to resemble a flame.
She slipped it over Rowan's head.
"We noticed you didn't have a token...and we wanted to give you one...I thought a flame fit...do you like it?"
"I love it Vivica...thank you."
He replied genuinely. That's when the mentors started spilling out advice, because we didn't have much time before we would leave.
"Brisa your hands are still healing....try not to reopen the wounds...you absolutely have to try to keep them from infection, like we talked about..."
Aideen talked next.
"You will raise up on the platforms...you have seen them on the screens.....don't step off before the time goes off or you will be blown to bits..."
"That's a blast."
Rowan replied sarcastically.
"And DO NOT try to grab anything at the cornucopia, it's just a bloodbath-"
Rowan tried to argue but Damon cut him off.
"No. Rowan we have lost way to many kids that way...unless you are willing to take the risk you two are not to go to the cornucopia at the beginning of the games...you two need to find each other, know where the other is before the timer is out...meet each other and run away as fast as you can...Running in a zigzag manner can help protect you from weapons that could be thrown by the attacker...it can confuse them and can mess up their aim.."
I nodded my head.
"Another way we lose to many kids is dehydration....your first goal is to find water...water is your life in the games...if you dehydrate that could be the end for you-...."
Aideen cut in.
"-you must also...Brisa use your knowledge to find food from the plants...we don't want to have to send gifts unless we really have to..."
"She is right...we can't be sending gifts all the time....we need to save it until it is life or death and we will decide that.....besides those, just use common sense...don't set a fire at night, it may be cold, but that flame will attract careers like a bear to honey....find a safe and hidden place to sleep....and just keep in mind all the capitol is capable of...they can send any type of weather, mutts, feasts, traps....they control the arena....and one last thing...you probably already know this but you have to watch what you say and do...because everyone in Panem will see and hear it..."
That's when the door opened. Lucius and Lucy were waiting for us. I felt a panic, I wasn't ready. I didn't want to leave.
"It is time to go."
Lucius said sternly. My heart started beating rapidly. He walked up to me.
"Let's go..now."
He grabbed my arm pulling me away.
"No..wait..stop!"
I had so many things I wanted to tell my mentors but I would never get the chance. Just as he had pulled me out of the door I yelled my last words.
"Thank you..For everything!"
The door shut behind me. Leaving just me, Lucius, Rowan and Lucy. The walk to the roof was a long slow one. I tried not to think about anything, but instead just keep my mind blank. It had become hard for me to feel emotions.
We boarded a hovercraft. They told us that it would only be an hour until we reached the arena. After a few minutes a lady walked up to me and placed a pen looking gadget on my arm. I tried to jerk away, but she held it down and reached under the chair pressing a button. Metal clasks slid over my arm, holding them in place. I tried yanking my arm again but moving it was impossible.
"They told me about you...they added this because of your history with resistance."
She said in an annoyed voice.
She placed the metal thing on my arm again and I cringed as she injected something into my flesh. I looked down at the skin and could barely see a small grey square. I started rubbing the skin, and the lady walked back and I knew that she was more annoyed than before
"It's your tracker...and it won't come out."
She walked away going back to her work.
I felt violated. When I'm in the arena they would always know where I was. I didn't like the idea of being stalked like prey, but I didn't like any of it for that matter. I soaked up the moments of silence that I received on our trip. I reminded myself of my tasks. The last words given to me from my loved ones.
Stay strong
Be wise
Fly back
Don't forget who I am
Don't let them look down on me
I will never lose my family's love
I am an example for others
Lift my chin up
Be tough until death
Be gentle
Know my priorities
I knew everything I had to do. They would all be watching me. My choices, decisions, and actions would be seen by all of Panem. I needed to be on the top of my mental game, but I doubted that would happen. I only got maybe two hours of sleep, which would make being mentally sharp hard.
I felt myself wanting to be back with Rowan in his arms, where everything was peaceful and simple. I just hoped I could get me and Skarlett through the first day. I knew Rowan would be okay. He had a score of twelve, he was strong, smart, and had plenty of sponsors. But for me, I tried to remember everything that Damon and Aideen had told me. They had actually been in and made it out of the games, and they knew what they were talking about. If I could find Rowan and Skarlett and get with them and make it out of the bloodbath area alive we would at least be safe from the first obstacle.
Something started bothering me, we had no idea of what the arena was. In the past it had been anywhere from, the frigid cold, scorching desert, broken city, grassland, mountains,
lakes, and sand dunes. The tribute outfits would give me an idea of what the conditions would be, but I wouldn't know for sure until the exact moment when I would rise into the arena.
I gripped my bracelet, remembering my family, my friends, and I knew I had chosen the perfect token. I looked down at my hands, they were purple and had red jagged lines going back and forth. Memories from that day came flashing back and I cringed remembering the pain. During that time I didn't even think I would live to where I was. I thought they would kill me, but here I was being sent to be killed. It was hard to see a difference in the two scenarios.
The hovercraft landed. We were escorted out, and I realized if I didn't take the opportunity now I wouldn't be able to say my last goodbye to Rowan before we entered the pit of horrors. I stood on my tiptoes trying to searching for him. I saw Lucy's blue hair popping out from in front of the crowd. Lucius had a tight watch on me, but I was determined to get to Rowan. When I spotted a gap in the people, I seized the moment and darted for the opening. I pushed past the people running to him. I grabbed his arm stopping him in his tracks. He was confused but I could tell that he was glad to see me. I knew Lucius was coming for me so I had to make it fast. I pulled him into a hug, holding him tight. I didn't want to let go of my last friend. I pulled away holding his arms. Our eyes met in a powerful gaze.
"Rowan...I..-"
I studered to get the words out. Lucius aggressively grabbed my arm.
"Are you trying to get yourself killed?!"
He growled. That's when Lucy walked over placing her hand on Lucius's shoulder.
"Come on Luci let her at least say goodbye....you don't have to be so stern all the time."
I mentally thanked her. I didn't know if I would have gotten to speak with him if it wasn't for her.
"Fine. Make it quick."
He gave me a death stare, and I wondered who would kill me first, Lucius or the games? I came to the conclusion of Lucius if I didn't hurry.
"Rowan...I...umm.."
I had wanted to say goodbye, but I didn't think about what I was going to say. This was a goodbye until the games. There was no promise that either of us would make it through the first day, to even talk again. This could be the last time we see each other. There was so much that I wanted to tell him, but when I tried to speak nothing came out.
"Brisa-"
He placed his hand on my face.
"I will see you in the arena.."
I interrupted him.
"But-"
"No. We will see eachother again...I promise."
I wished he wouldn't make promises he couldn't keep. It's not like he could promise that we would both live, the games were a free for all. Nobody knew what would happen.
He pulled me into a hug, and whispered in my ear.
"Be brave."
I felt myself wanting to cry. All of the pressure, emotions, and loss was weighing down my spirit. I had already lost to many, and I couldn't lose Rowan. He was my last friend, I had said goodbye to everyone else. I tightly squeezed my eyes, wanting to never let go. It was as if the moment froze in time, until I was yanked back. I tried to resist but everything in me was to weak to fight back. Lucius had grabbed my arm and was pulling me away from Rowan. I was being dragged down the hall when I looked back to see him. His eyes were filled with sadness, and I was sure mine were as well.
Everything around me flew by and the next thing I knew I was in a room. This was were I would spend the last hour before entering the arena. A huge meal was sat before me. It would just be me and Lucius until the moment when I entered the arena. I was definitely not pleased at the fact that he would be my last "encouragement". If anything he was counting on watching my death. I tried to ignore his presence, but my ever growing hatred to him was hard to push away.
There was a huge variety of foods and drinks set out before me. I knew I needed to eat filling foods and drink water. I couldn't eat too much to where it would make it harder for me to run away quickly, but I wanted to be full enough to sustain me if I couldn't find food. I ate meats and some cashews that were in a bowl. I also drank a fair amount of water, to prevent from quick dehydration. We both ate in silence, until I asked a question that I had been wanting to ask for days.
"Why do you hate me so much?"
He looked up from his food, with an annoyed expression. He looked back down and responded flatly.
"I hate everyone."
I thought before answering, if I didn't I might have said something that I would surely regret later. I decided to go with the clearest way to ask what I had been wondering.
"Why?"
"Well I guess since your going to die anyway I might as well inform you.....because no one here deserves my love or talent... I should be designing for district 1 and 2.... but no I'm stuck with trashy district 11..."
I ignored his last comment about the districts and focused on the part where he said no one here deserved his love.
"What about Lucy?....you seem to respect and...care...for her."
"I am legally required to respect her and she has been my designing partner from the beginning, so I care for her some....and you none."
"Okay."
I said flatly. I drank my last sip of water just as I was ushered into another room. Lucius helped me put on my clothes for the arena. They included a dark grey shirt, a thin forest green jacket, which made me wonder if we would be in a wooded area. It was too thin to protect from the cold or wet but it could be for camouflage. I tucked my pants into my boots, they were brown, leather, and laced up. I knotted them three times into tight bow to ensure that when I would run, I wouldn't trip. Lucius tightly braided my hair across the back of my head and pinned the braid into a bun on the side. I was physically ready. I had a full stomach, I was hydrated, had my clothes, and my hair was up. Being mentally ready was something different.
I tried to prepare my mind. I had one beginning goal; look for Rowan and Skarlett, so we could find each other and meet up after. I needed to watch what I was to say and do in the arena. I had to keep in mind that everyone will be watching me. I had to find water, food, and shelter.
I tried not to think about my family. The emotions started to creep in but I quickly shut them out. I couldn't think about them in a stressful time like this. I needed to be on the top of my mental game if I was to survive at least the first day.
The games started at exactly 10:00, I only had a few more minutes remaining. I broke out in a cold sweat, and I started fidgeting with my bracelet anxiously. Lucius had left the room, but he walked back in just in time to give me my last "encouragement".
"You have 2 minutes then you better be in that tube."
He pointed behind me. I turned around. There was a huge glass funnel that had a door sized opening to walk in. I decided that I would rather be in the tube than talk to Lucius, so I started walking towards it.
"You don't want to give a last goodbye?"
He said in a mean but sarcastic voice. That's when my patience ran out and I started spilling out the feeling I had been holding in for way to long.
"I'm sorry that you have had a tough career, but you shouldn't pick on kids to get rid of your anger-"
I felt my voice rising.
"-because one day you will look back and realize how much harm you caused to innocent children!-"
He had been slowly walking towards me. I saw the undeniable anger on his face and I started slowly backing up into the tube. I was up against the side of the tube when he pulled something out of his pocket. It was a black metal rectangle it flipped open, revealing a sharp blade.
"Lucius? You can't do this-"
"Who is going to stop me? The capitol?....ha! They are paying me to hurt you...."
I was in shock. They were paying him to hurt me? It could be that he was lying, but I was still confused. What did the capitol have against me? Was he set up to something like this the whole time? My mind was racing with questions. My heart started beating faster as he moved the knife closer and closer to me. Before I had time to move he grabbed my hand. Where he was gripping it had turned white. We made eye contact and I knew that he had no fear, or regret about what he was doing. I screamed for help, and no one came. I tried yanking my hand away, but his grip was tighter than anything I had experienced. He slowly aimed his dagger at my freshly healed wounds. One cut and I would be out a huge disadvantage.
"Please..Lucius...think about what you are doing..."
I was begging him to reconsider.
"I have been thinking about it....and I think that you should die...and I decided that I want to be apart of the process..."
That's when he started slowly slicing through my skin. I screamed out in pain and tried to jerk my arm away. Red fluid started oozing out of my palm, and shocks of pain ran up my arm. Adrenaline rushed through my veins and I did the only thing that I could think of. I swung my remaining arm at his face. He thrust back from the impact. That's when the timer started counting down the time before the tributes had to be in their tube. I had 20 seconds before I would be safe from his rath.
When he was still in shock, bending over, I kicked him in the stomach sending him back again. He released my hand and I held my fists in a tight ball. I was prepared for whatever he planned next. He lifted up and gave me a creepy smile, which made me question his sanity even more.
"I can't wait to watch you die.-"
This comment was predictable, but the next was not.
"That lucky boy I wish I could kill you myself...."
I blinked in confusion. That's when the door slid closed. I turned around panicked. I grabbed my hand tightly, and tried to stop the bleeding. It helped as much as Lucius helped me prepare for the arena, which was none. My heartbeat quickened as the cell started rising. Everything I had been preparing for came down to this one moment. Everything was a blur, and chaos surrounded me. From Lucius, my bleeding hand, and the brightness that had now appeared from the roof of the capsule, I was paralyzed with fear. My platform lifted up and I looked around, the games had begun.