"What happened?" He asked looking down at her face.
She managed to curve her lips. "Nothing!"
He sighed. "Don't lie to me. That's something you are doing a lot these days!" His frustration was evident in his words. But he did not like it. He wanted her to pour her heart out to him. He would take care. He didn't want to find letters holding all that she wished to express.
She moved away sitting up straight. "I don't know. I just feel..like this way...and have never felt it before. " she found it hard to choose words. He always knew her so well without she having to spell it out. But this feeling wasn't just confusing her, it was confusing him as well.
"Like what?"
"I could be as strong as you were. But I was not!"
"You were Anika. You took all my responsibilities over yourself. From my duties towards my parents to office to social functions. You handed everything so flawlessly. You lived me Anika. You have no clue, because that's how good you were."
She gazed at him. She knew he wasn't lying. She knew he wasn't placating her. He meant what he said.
He cupped her face. "You just think you depend on me. Because that's how you choose to see things. You are independent, but paint yourself as dependent on me. When I was here your never went to office. I pushed you so may times. But all you said was you wanted to be a homemaker, be at home. It was your choice, I respected it. But I knew why. You wanted to be at home for me. When I came back from work you wanted to be there for me. "
She looked away. That was the truth. She never wanted to work because she thought she'd not be able to give him or her new family time. She chose it. She didn't want –in anyway, profession to come between them. She was sceptic about working in the same field.
She knew his ego, she knew his pride, she knew the man he was outside home. She did not want to mess up their professional and personal life. Working for a company other than Oberoi, meant less flexibility and less time at home. She knew he loved spending time with her. She simply decided to choose to be a housewife and be home with her mother in law and be there for him when he came home at lunch and after working hours.
"Anika you've been the best wife. You've always been there for me whenever I needed a companion. You've stood by me through everything. You respected my decision of going abroad. I know I screwed up things there –I didn't keep my promise, because.." His voice trailed off and silence fell.
"Say it." She said waiting for him to continue.
"I didn't want you to see me as a failure. You believed in me. You freaking gave up your own career for me. You have done everything for me. Every thing. " his voice was deep. He was growing emotional as he spoke. But he maintained a clear tone.
"That's the least I could do. " he said biting his lips. Clearly able to see her wet eyes and tight lips.
"You need to keep this one thing embedded in your head. You will always be my hero, I can never see you as a failure. I don't care what the world says. You. Will. Be. The. Best. Man. In. The.World. For. Me." She said her voice sounding cross. Her index finger pressing into his chest. Every time he said it, it annoyed her. What good was that self confidence –that he flaunted in his attitude outside home –good for? if it wasn't deep rooted within himself?
"I know." He said wrapping his palm around her angry finger that poked his chest. She wiped her tear from the other hand. "You need to realise that Shivaay. I know you don't care about the world. I know you've got that confidence when it come to the world. But when it comes to me – where does that confidence disappear?"
" You are too good Anika. I don't want to be a disappointment. I –"
"Really? " she was getting mad by the minute. Was he stupid? He clearly was.
"Shivaay you are the best thing that's ever happened to me!" She said clear and aloud.
He looked at her. Her eyes were screaming love. Her tears that rolled down her cheeks –danced love. Her loud, clear, crisp voice was soaked in love. She freaking loved him with every cell of her body.
"I– " he failed to say a thing.
"You are an idiot. If you ever say that again, I swear I'd..." She simply hugged him. He hugged her back.
"You are a fool Shivaay. You love me so much but don't have confidence in your love?"
"I don't know Anika. I just don't... Know."
She pulled back. " I don't know how to make you believe in your love for me. I guess what I am today is the only proof."
He caressed her face. "I don't know what I'd do without you!"
She smiled. "You complete me."
"You define me!" He said as she brought her forehead closer to his.
Silence devoured the words. Heartbeats and entangled breaths were all, the two souls could hear and feel. The sky had no stars to display. Not even the moon. The sky simply looked over the two souls whose love shined so bright that it made the sky shy away into darkness.
* * *
Anika woke up to find herself on the bed. She sat up straight. Was the conversation a dream?
She hoped not. She looked at the clock. Darn! Eight! How did time go so fast when she was asleep? She got off the bed and moved to the washroom. When she was out she looked around for him.
"Looking for me?" He inquired walking into the room in his jogging tracks and gym vest.
"Yeah " she said gazing at him.
He hugged her, "Good morning!" He was all sweaty.
"Shivaay. Sweat!" She said thankful that he pulled away quickly.
"I thought you were used to it by now! " He said sitting on the bed closing his eyes and letting the fan dry his sweat.
"You put me on the bed?"
"No, Santa Claus came especially to do it!" He commented sarcastically .
"Very funny. If you end up with a back pain don't blame me " Anika distinctly remembered two instances when he had carried her. Both times he had complained of pain in his back.
"Darling, you've lost weight and I 'be developed some really strong muscles. " he said grabbing her hand and pulling her close. She stared at his eyes, that had been on her ever since he had stepped in. Those eyes spoke so much, made her feel so many things in mere seconds. Right now they bore into hers as though exposing his craving, his need, yet at the same time shouting his love for her.
"Shivaay you are still sweaty!" She said quietly not able to look away from his tantalizing eyes.
He looked at her squarely. Then in one quick move carried her in his arms and walked to the bathroom. Shocked at the sudden action, she looked at him, questioning his action. While he smirked and stopped only when he had entered the shower cabinet.
"What on earth is in your mind?" She asked him, her heart thudding and breath getting uneven as he pit her down. She knew it well. She knew what was in his head. At least had a clue.
"Like you don't know!" He said reaching to her t-shirts end. In one quick pull, it was over head and out. He pulled her closer his bluish orbs looking right into her chocolaty brown ones that dilated.
In that split second, the two knew, they'd never have enough of each other!
Feedback, povs awaited.
Next chapter needless to say will be mature. That's why I stopped there. For those uncomfortable, can skip next.
-Anami!