Hey, I need more suggestions, especially for this chapter. Anyway, please enjoy.
1.) Flamethrower (don't try this at home, kids)
Bonnie: Mike, I have a question for you.
Mike [annoyed]: What?
Bonnie: Are you fireproof?
Mike [confused]: What?! No!
Bonnie: Good. *uses flamethrower on the doors to Mike's office*
Mike [annoyed]: You son of a b*tch (biscuit).
Bonnie: HO! HO! HO!
Mike: Is that your evil laugh, Santa?
FAIL!
2.) Bombs
Foxy [panicking]: MIKE!
Mike [annoyed]: What....?
Mike [confused]: Uh... why is there a bomb strapped to your chest?
Foxy: BB told me it was fake! I only have 20 seconds to live unless you open this do- *BOOM*
Mike: Well, now he's the least of my problems.
Bonnie [happily]: Don't worry, Foxy! I'll remake you into a soup can!
FAIL!
3.) Noise.... horrible noise..
Bonnie plays his guitar as badly as possible.
Mike: *covering his ears* Oh geez, please help me!
Bonnie: You should see me play the piccolo!
Mike [mumbling]: Why do I do this to myself?
Bonnie: So if you want me to stop, you better let me in!
Mike: To make the "music" louder? No thanks!
Bonnie: No! To give you a quicker death of course!
Bonnie's guitar breaks and he runs away in tears. Wait- do animatronics cry?
FAIL!
4.) Pizza
Chica: Hey Mike~. I got pizza~!
Mike: Oh really? Oh wait... on second thought, nevermind.
Chica: But.... it's pizza! *blows up*
Mike: Wow.... I've never experienced happiness like this before.
FAIL!
5.) Gun
Freddy: Hey Mike. How are you?
Mike [sacrastically]: *points shotgun at the animatronics* I'm doing great! What about you?
Chica: What is that?
Mike: Oh this? It's just a simple little machine used to silence annoying robots.
Chica: Ooh! Can I see?
Mike: Sure! *shoots Chica's head off*
Chica [hyperventilating]: AHHH! MY HEAD!!
Freddy [angry]: What was that for?
Mike: *aims gun at Freddy*
Freddy [scared]: Ok... I'll just leave....
Mike: Good.
Chica [angry]: WAIT! WHAT ABOUT MY HEAD?
Freddy: Sorry Chica. You're gonna have to fend for yourself!