In the previous chapter, Eriko petitioned Naruto, Sasuke, Sakura, and Itachi to find Tsubaki (which Itachi did gladly [He was rejected by them both]). The three protagonists fought against Kakashi, proving themselves to be way better than their canon counterparts. They still couldn't touch a hair on Kakashi's head, though. Fugaku gives Sasuke a baby, which he gives to the Hokage, and she is later revealed to be the daughter of an Iwa nuke-nin. Sakura gets into a bar fight with a man who was trying to drug her, and Itachi finds out that Shisui owns the Kuro ie's bar. Things are getting interesting...
-/_\-
Chapter Four:
The Horridly Nonsensical!
"Good," Sakura said as she spotted Shisui walk into the bar, "you're here."
Shisui didn't seem to notice (or at least care) that Sakura was currently standing in a man's chest cavity. Blood covered her shinobi sandals, the entire visible portion of her leggings, and the bottom of her skirt.
Shisui sighed. "Ms. Haruno, this is the fifth bar fight you've started this month. Do you have any idea how much of your budget goes into cleaning these up?"
"Three and a half percent?" Sakura guessed.
"Just three, actually."
They all ducked as someone's head went flying over them.
"What does that have to do with anything, Mr. Uchiha?"
"The next one you start will be your last."
Sakura's eyes narrowed. "Is that a threat, Mr. Uchiha?"
Shisui's gaze seemed to sharpen. He didn't activate his Sharingan, but his eyes still gleamed blood-red. Sakura was suddenly aware of the guards that had discreetly surrounded her.
"It is," Shisui said simply.
Sakura could take the guards, they probably weren't ninja, but Shisui was a different story. Then there was the fact that he had brought Itachi along, and he would, without a doubt, support his best friend.
Of course, Sakura had brought her own guards, but still...
"My apologies, Mr. Uchiha. It will not happen again."
And suddenly Shisui was grinning brightly, and the guards disappeared.
"I'm sure it won't, squirt. Now, uh, who're you standing in? He's not important, is he?"
"Nah," Sakura said. "He's just some guy who tried to drug me."
Shisui's nose scrunched up. "Ugh. Whatever. Please step out of him. I'll have him disposed of."
Sakura nodded. "Of course."
And all was sort-of well.
-/_\-
Meanwhile in a place that looks suspiciously like Hell (probably because it was):
"So...how long has it been?" Mizuki asked.
Kakkri, who was sharpening his nails, blinked. "You mean since you've died?"
"Yeah."
"Around...one, maybe two, days."
"...then why does it feel like two years?"
"Time works differently down here," Kakkri said, shrugging.
"I see...can you stop boiling me now?"
"Kid, you've got twenty centuries left before you're judged again to see if you're worthy for Heaven."
"I thought I was 'eternally damned'?"
Kakkri waved his arm. "Some upstarts in the Lands of Nightmares won a case. Some BS about how people change and that torturing them for all of eternity is a cruel and unusual punishment. Though as a side-effect, we don't have to spend as much money creating land that can be used to torture. They started to lower the taxes!"
"You have to pay taxes?"
"Why does every human think we don't pay taxes?"
"Well, you're generally portrayed as savage, bloodthirsty monsters who don't care for civilized society."
"Generally?"
"Well, modern authors have started to romanticize demons a lot."
"Well, it'll happen eventually to all civilizations."
"...I don't even want to know."
"Yeah, you really don-"
Another demon ran over to Kakkri, interrupting him. It whispered something in his ears and Kakkri's eyes widened. He turned back to Mizuki.
"Looks like you're getting a little break. Stay in the water. I'll be back in a bit."
Mizuki watched, confused, as Kakkri hurriedly walked away.
"I wonder what's going on..."
-/_\-
Over to Naruto:
"Er...what do we do with her?" Naruto asked hesitantly, gesturing to Naya.
Hiruzen Sarutobi sighed. "We wait."
"For what?"
"For Fugaku to get his a- er, butt in here and explain what's going on."
Naruto nodded, pretending that he didn't hear the slip of words. "Also, what are you working on?"
"PINK FLUFFY UNICORN!"
"This is concerning the water crisis in Konoha's southernmost district, Fushigina Basho."
"I thought the southernmost district was Okina hi."
"Well it is, but most people refer to it as Fushigina Basho these days..."
"Okay then. What's wrong with the water there?"
"Well, the water there has this odd, yellow-ish look to it. At first, we thought it was rusty pipes or a lead imbalance, but nope. Turns out someone threw hundreds of gallons of food coloring into the Ha River."
"Why would someone do that?"
"Probably to cause unrest in the Village. We've informed the residents there that the water is completely safe for drinking but many still refuse to. Now I need to figure out if it's worth it to have all that water cleaned...on a related note, the bottled water industry is getting popular."
"I...see. Is this what you do every day?"
The Hokage sighed, absentmindedly stroking Naya's hair (which was, by the way, incredibly soft). "Pretty much. I answer stupid requests and listen to the 'esteemed council members' fight. A lot."
Naruto winced. While he was well acquainted (and maybe, possibly friends) with quite a few council members (both Shinobi and Civilian), he knew having them all in one room and listening to them fight over important topics could not be good for your sanity.
"I'll pray for your sanity, Old Man."
Hiruzen snorted. "The day you go to a shrine is the day I go cold turkey."
Naruto suddenly gave him a vicious grin. "Hand over the pipe, Old Man."
Lord Third felt a sudden sense of dread go through his stomach. "Why?"
"Where do you think I got this?" Naruto asked, gesturing to the Katsumori hanging around his neck.
Hiruzen chuckled nervously. "Stop joking, Naruto. You and I both know that you got that at a grocery store..."
"Nope!" Naruto said brightly, popping the "p". "Sasuke and Sakura took me to a real shrine. The attendant gave it to me and everything!"
Hiruzen slumped in defeat. "I-I see..."
"Since I'm nice," Naruto continued, "I'll only take it for a week."
"I knew I liked you for a reason!" Hiruzen exclaimed, stars in his eyes.
"I mostly just don't want to deal with the backlash I'd get for giving the Hokage withdrawal symptoms," Naruto said, dismissively.
"I still love you!" Hiruzen said brightly.
It might have come off a bit...weird since Naruto, scooching backward ever-so-slightly, said, "That's nice...I'll, uh, be going now. And have Konohamaru move in with me."
"Koko the unicorn 'ill wule the world!"
-/_\-
"Lord Hokage, why was my son's teammate running out of here while screaming 'PEDOPHILE!' at the top of his lungs?"
"Koko the unicorn will defeat anyone in his way!"
"That's nice," Hiruzen muttered, depression lines hanging over his head.
"An' then he'll kill them and bath in their bwood!"
"Very good," Hiruzen muttered again.
Sasuke balked. "Lord Hokage, shouldn't you be more concerned about that?"
"About what?"
"Her unicorn is bathing in the blood of his enemies," Fugaku deadpanned.
"What's wrong with that? It brings back good memories, actually. It sounds like the bedtime stories my mother used to tell me." His eyes widened and he poked Naya. "Do you want to hear Konohamaru's favorite story? It's called 'Akira's First Kill'! It details Akira killing a person and then destroying his corpse. It's quite interesting and educational-"
"Yeah, I'll take her," Fugaku said, scooping Naya out of his lap. He was slightly disturbed by how bright her face was at the thought of hearing the graphic tale.
Fugaku's own father had told him the same story (it was a popular ninja story) as a child and it had traumatized him. He had vowed to never let his children hear it. Instead, he was a good father and took his impressionable, four-year-old son to the front lines of a war. (Sadly, he was still a much better father than his own ever was)
"Lord Third," Sasuke said, "are you sure you're...uh...mentally fit to take care of Konohamaru?"
"I've already told you that I've raised two children."
"One abandoned you for the capital and only recently came back, and the other's dead," Sasuke said bluntly. Fugaku's eyes widened in horror.
"Sasuke-"
"I fail to see your point," Hiruzen interrupted. "They're both Shinobi and Asuma's rebellious phase set in later than usual."
"You're lying to yourself and you know it," Sasuke snapped.
Hiruzen looked like he wanted to object, but he paused. After a moment of silence, he burst into tears.
Fugaku, alarmed, stuttered, "L-Lord Hokage? What's wrong?!"
"I-I'm a horrible father, aren't I?"
Their silence only furthered the Third Hokage into a sobbing mess.
In the end, Fugaku and Sasuke excused themselves, Naya in tow, while the Third blubbered on about how he should have spent more time at home.
The fact that Naya's father was a missing ninja from the Stone never really came up.
"...an' then Koko 'ill use the gnomes as swaves 'cause gnomes are ugly!"
-/_\-
The room was silent and many Jounin shifted uncomfortably.
Kakashi, who was three hours late (as usual), paused.
"...what's wrong?"
Kurenai Yuhi coughed and tilted her head towards the corner of the room.
The Third Hokage was sobbing, not even acknowledging that they existed.
Kakashi sweat-dropped. "He's been like that since you're gotten here?" The Jounin nodded. "Okay then..." Kakashi promptly got out his Icha Icha and started reading.
"Aren't you going to do anything?" Genma Shiranui demanded.
"Why would I?"
"You're Kakashi Hatake!" Genma said.
"And he's the Hokage," Kakashi shot back calmly. "He could probably kill me even if he's bawling his eyes out."
Genma blinked. "You have a point," he said finally.
Then Asuma barged in. "Sorry I'm late, I had to stop the Uzumaki brat from forcing my nephew to live with him- FATHER STOP CRYING LIKE A BABY!"
Hiruzen perked up. He turned around and leaped at Asuma, capturing him in a hug. "I'M SO SORRY ASUMA!" he wailed. Asuma winced, patting his father's back awkwardly.
"I'll accept your apology if you get off of me."
Hiruzen nodded, letting go. Then, apparently sapped of energy, he went over to his chair, sat down, put his head on his desk, and promptly fell asleep.
Asuma sighed. "Just leave the paperwork on his table, he should be awake in two or three hours." All the Jounin nodded uncomfortably.
Kakashi giggled.
-/_\-
"Shisui, were you really going to kill Sakura?"
Shisui, who hadn't said a single word to him since they left the- his- bar, looked at him strangely.
"What on Earth made you think that I was going to kill her? I was just going to ban her from the bar."
Itachi sighed. "What am I supposed to think? My brother's a professional thief, one of his friends gambles regularly, the other is a mob boss, and then you're suddenly a bar owner!"
"Ah, you've found out about Sasuke, too?"
"Yep," Itachi said despondently. "I smelled the ashes of someone he killed, then called him out on it."
Shisui raised an eyebrow. "I assume it didn't go well?"
"It didn't. I don't even have a girlfriend to comfort me."
"All the girls you want will never come to you," Shisui said sagely. "It's the Uchiha's curse."
"Moving on...I have an idea!"
"What is it?"
"Shisui, be my boyfriend!"
"...I'm flattered, but dating you just feels wrong."
"Why?" Itachi demanded.
"I don't know, we're best friends! It would be weird!"
"I'll convince you eventually," Itachi said. "Until then...maybe I'll take you up on that offer for sake."
-/_\-
The next day, Team Seven met up at the bridge in the middle of the Village.
Kakashi raised an eyebrow. "Ducky, why are you covered in spit-up?"
"My father brought home a baby and she threw a tantrum."
Kakashi's eyebrow went even higher. "I always took your father as the faithful kind. How'd your mother take it?"
Sasuke scowled. "She's in police custody. She is not my illegitimate half-sister!"
"Too bad, that would have added a lot of spice to your life."
"Shut up!"
"Anyway, who's ready for some D-Ranks?"
His cute little Genin groaned.
-/_\-
Twelve Hours Later:
Hiruzen Sarutobi sighed, placing his pipe down (Naruto had never taken it and seemed too scared to approach him now [that brat]).
"Kakashi, you're here again, I see."
"Yep!" Kakashi nodded cheerfully.
"You were literally in here five minutes ago for a weed-picking mission."
"I know."
"And five minutes before that for a fence-painting mission."
"Yep!"
"And five minutes before that for the Tora mission." Sasuke and Naruto winced and Sakura started giggling maniacally.
The Third cleared his throat. "What I was trying to say is how are you finishing the missions so quickly?"
"It's amazing what you can do with three hundred and one Shadow Clones."
Hiruzen sighed once again. "Get out of my office."
"Yes sir!"
-/_\-
"So," Kakashi said, "looks like we're done with D-Ranks for today. How about some training?"
"It's ten at night," Sakura pointed out dryly.
"I fail to see your point."
"How about we train tomorrow?" Naruto affered.
"Nonsense!" Kakashi said. "We shall train! Like, right now."
Sasuke sighed. "Fine. Sure. Whatever. At least I don't have to see that devil child again."
"Hey," Naruto protested, "Naya's awesome!"
"She keeps shoving a pen into my hands and insisting that it's a unicorn named Koko. And she won't stop calling me 'Dada'. It's disturbing."
"At least one of us is okay with this," Sakura muttered.
Sasuke shrugged.
"Whelp," Kakashi said, "let's start with tree walking!"
"Already know it," the three Genin chorused.
"I see. How about water walking?"
"Water walking?"
"Looks like you don't know it. Let's begin."
Ten minutes later, Sakura was standing on the water, slightly strained due to her small chakra reserves, Sasuke was wobbling on top, his eyes shut tight in concentration, and Naruto was glad that the Hokage taught him how to swim.
Breaking the surface after another failed attempt, Naruto took in a big breath of air.
Making his way to the shore, Naruto dragged himself onto the dirt.
Kakashi sighed. "Your chakra control is atrocious! How the hell did you manage to do the tree walking technique?!"
"Five days and a lot of determination," Naruto panted.
Sakura gasped, apparently having no more chakra to accurately do the technique. She fell into the water and the splash ended up startling Sasuke enough for him to lose his concentration, which meant he also fell in.
Naruto stifled a snort. Kakashi sighed again. "Okay team, huddle up."
When they were all together, three-fourths of them dripping wet, Kakashi said, "First of all, congratulations. You're working very hard and not quitting, despite the fact that it's eleven at night and the water is freezing cold.
"On the more pressing matters, Pinky, you're chakra capacity leaves much to be desired. I want you to keep channeling chakra into your feet, even when you're not on water or a vertical surface. Only stop when you can't anymore. Wait until you're at full power again, then repeat. It'll grow your chakra pool to an easier-to-use size. Not too much, though. I want you to keep your excellent control."
Sakura nodded.
"Good. Ducky, you can stay on water just fine. Keep going until it feels natural. I don't want you to fall into a lake because you're distracted by a kunai, especially against a Kiri-nin."
"Right," Sasuke said.
"Yes. And Naruto..." Kakashi thought for a moment. "Okay, Naruto, I want you to use your chakra to make a half-sphere indent in the water by the day after tomorrow."
"Yes sir!"
"Good. You three are dismissed."
-/_\-
"Sasuke, why are you dripping wet?"
"Kakashi-sensei taught us water walking today."
"Ah, that explains it."
"...Brother?"
"Yes, Sasuke?"
"You're drunk, aren't you?"
"Yep."
"You find out about Shisui?"
"I did. He rejected me, too."
"Ah, no wonder you're drunk."
"If you'll excuse me, I must now ponder the futility of my existence."
"A sake-induced existential crisis? You just don't want to go inside!"
"...Mother will kill me."
"Say, didn't you drink yesterday? Why are you drunk right now?"
"Because the author was lazy and didn't want to go back and correct the error."
"Don't break the Fourth Wall."
"Hey, I'm drunk, I get a pass."
"...I suppose."
"I'll spend the night out here, contemplating life and making delusional plans to get Shisui to fall in love with me."
"Yeah, about that, why do you want to date Shisui?"
"Because yaoi is hot."
"Well, I can't exactly argue with that. Say, whatever happened to that one girl...Izumi, I think."
Itachi waved his hand dismissively. "I'm pretty sure that Lord Kishimoto just made her so that the audience wouldn't think I was gay or asexual. You know Shōnen and their manga: Straight couples only, no matter what common sense says."
"I don't care if you're drunk, no more than one Fourth Wall reference per chapter!"
"Well, this fanfiction is about breaking the norm, so-"
"Just for that, we'll go to the next section."
"Wait, no-"
-/_\-
Sakura made her way into the kitchen very slowly.
Goryu was making out with Mikaso again. Sakura sighed, irritated.
"You know what, I don't even care. I want some water, goddammit!"
Goryu and Mikaso didn't seem to hear her loud proclamation. Eye twitching, Sakura made her way to the fridge. Grabbing her glass and getting her water, Sakura was about to drink. Then she paused.
"...why is this water yellow-ish?"
"Ah, that's food coloring," Mebuki said. "Someone dumped a few hundred gallons of it into the Ha River. Here, have a bottled water."
Sakura sighed. "Last week it was that weird cult sending missionaries everywhere. Today it's food-colored water. What's next?"
"People are starting to call this place Fushigina Basho, you know."
Sakura sighed. "I'm not even surprised."
"Can you tell Goryu and the cook to stop making out?"
"Eh, they're not causing any trouble."
"It's disturbing."
"So is murdering people. You seem fine with that."
"FINE?! Might I remind you that we spend THREE AND A HALF PERCENT CLEANING UP YOUR DAMN MESSES!"
"About that, I really should put my foot down about the whole 'No blood in the house!' thing."
"YOU BETTER, SAKURA HARUNO!"
Goryo and Mikaso continued to make out.
-/_\-
Naruto was alone in his apartment. All was silent as he stared out his window. He was lonely. Not many people liked him, everyone glared at him on his birthday, and sometimes he wondered if the world was better off with him dead-
"NO I DON'T! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!" Naruto growled at no one in particular like an idiot.
"HEY, TAKE THAT BACK!" he yelled at the narrator who quite obviously didn't give a crap what he thought.
"I'LL KICK YOUR A-"
The idiot's mouth clicked shut before he could utter the vulgar word.
"Mghmgmn!" the idiot exclaimed, face as red as a tomato.
-/_\-
"Mmmm, tomatoes."
"Eh?"
"Nothing, Itachi."
-/_\-
Naruto, managing to pry his mouth open, yelled, "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!"
He was obviously very idiotic if he didn't recognize this for what it was: a distranction.
Naruto's eyes widened and he whirled around the room, kunai out, ready to defend himself against any and all threats.
Once again, he's an idiot for not realizing that he was under a genjutsu.
Naruto's eye twitched. Muttering something under his breath, he brought his fingers into the proper symbol and said, "Kai!" The genjutsu dispelled.
Nothing seemed different. Except, of course, there was a note on his bed. It had five words on it.
Naruto's eyes widened.
-/_\-
"...you alright, Kakashi?"
Tenzo didn't know what to think when he found Kakashi at a popular bar in the merchant district. Kakashi usually only came here on the last day of every month. Today was the twelfth.
He wasn't even drinking anything...no, wait, he is- IS THAT WATER?! AT A BAR?! OH HELL NO!
With a ferocious roar, Tenzo grabbed the glass of water and hurled it at the far wall. It shattered immediately. Kakashi's eyes widened.
"Tenzo, what the hell-"
"You," Tenzo hissed, "have done a horrible sin!"
Anko walked up behind him. "Com on," she slurred, "you're overreacting. I'm sure it wasn't that bad-"
"That glass I threw was filled with water."
As soon as that sentence left Tenzo's mouth, Anko turned and slapped Kakashi. Everyone was silent and quite a few people were glaring at the Copy-nin.
"Kakashi Hatake," Anko growled, "if you are going to drink water, do it at home. Do not plague this holy site with your soberness, heathen!"
"...I was just thirsty."
"Then at least drink your water outside like a normal, sane person!"
"Oh, you are not allowed to say that, Mitarashi!"
"What the hell did you say, Hatake?!" Anko roared, punching him square in the jaw.
Kakashi fell out of his seat.
Tenzo sweat-dropped. "Okay, I think Kakashi's learned his lesson, Anko."
"Oh, he better!" Anko huffed, walking back to her (now-terrified) date.
Kakashi glared at Anko as she walked away. Then he turned to Tenzo.
"Why were you two so, uh, passionate about that?"
"What kind of idiot drinks water at a bar?" Tenzo snapped. Then he sighed. "Whatever. Why're you here?"
"Well, there was this old homeless woman who gave me a note saying that she was the descendant of a mage and-"
"Kakashi."
"Fine. I'm nearly broke and this place has the cheapest meals. I didn't get alcohol because I only drink on the last day of every month."
"...huh. That was actually a reasonable explanation."
"What's that supposed to mean."
"Nothing."
"...okay then."
"So, why are you nearly broke?"
"Because apparently, you have to take a lot of tests to become a Jounin-sensei. Which means a lot of studying. Which means that I don't have time to take any missions. Kurenai is in the same boat as me. Now that I have students, I can only take D-ranks because that's all they can handle."
"What do you mean 'all they can handle'? You won't know what they can handle until you test their metal. Maybe not now, but you need to get a C-rank mission within the next two weeks. You can't pay rent solely on D-ranks, you know."
"...what if they're not ready?"
"Then you and I will be the only ones to know. Besides, it's a C-rank, what could go wrong?"
-/_\-
Suiren blinked up at the man standing in front of him.
"...who the hell are you?"
The man blinked. "Huh, you've got a hell of a mouth for a kid."
Suiren smiled. "Why thank you."
The man chuckled. "I heard your plans to take over the world."
Suiren's smile turned wary. "How?"
"...you do realize that you're in no way quiet, right?"
"..."
"Anyway, what if I told you that I work for someone who could help you achieve that goal?"
Suiren took a step back. "What are you talking about."
The man raised his hands placatingly. "You don't have to accept if you don't want to. I promise, though, that he will help you rule the world."
"...what do I have to do?"
The man smirked, then leaned over and whispered something in his ear. Suiren nodded.
"I'll do it."
The man's smirk grew. "Good. I'll meet you here next week then."
And Suiren smirked back.
-/_\-
In a private meeting room in the Kuro ie, Sasuke and Sakura stared seriously at a terrified Naruto.
"Why did you call us here and insist on us being alone?" Sakura asked.
"I was at home a-and someone placed a genjutsu on me. I-I managed to break it and then there was a note on the bed a-and..."
"Can we see the note?" Sasuke asked gently.
Naruto hesitated before nodding. He slowly took out the note and unraveled it, placing it on the table in front of them so they could see it.
Sakura recoiled backward and dread and terror filled Sasuke's stomach. All because of five words.
Brace yourself.
Plot coming soon.
- End of Chapter Four -
-/_\-
Omake (1) [THIS IS NOT PART OF THE STORY]:
Sakura stared down at the kid who Sasuke had asked her to look after for a few hours.
"So..." she started awkwardly, "what's your name?"
"Suiren," the kid said.
"It's nice to meet you, Suiren. I'm Sakura."
"Your parents didn't have a good imagination."
Sakura blinked. Then she smirked. "You've got a bit of a backbone, don't you?"
"I have to have a backbone if I want to rule the world."
"Rule the world? Heh, I like you."
"I don't."
Sakura hugged him. "Don't worry, you will."
"Let go of me."
"But you're my friend now. After I get you through a psychologist, we can get started on world domination."
"...I like you."
And so the nations fell, one by one, to Suiren Uchiha and Sakura Haruno.
Sasuke knew he should have asked Shisui to babysit.
Omake (2):
Naruto was perfectly fine, minding his own business, when Sasuke walked up and punched him in the gut.
Naruto choked. "Wh-What the hell Sasuke!"
"When you thought Lord Hokage was a pedophile, you just left without taking Naya!" Sasuke yelled.
"It was too late!" Naruto said. "And he is a pedophile! It makes sense, where do you think Orochimaru got it from?!"
"That's not an excuse!" Sasuke snapped.
"Why are you so worked up about this, anyway?! You don't even like her!"
Sasuke's face went red. "I don't! Am I not allowed to be mad that you left a little kid alone with a goddamn pedophile?!"
"I had this weird feeling that she could take care of herself!"
"She's four!"
"SHUT UP!"
"YOU'RE A HORRIBLE PERSON!"
"SO ARE YOU!"
"YOU-"
Naya watched on with curiosity. She then walked up to them calmly and motioned for both of them to stop.
Serenely, she said, "Koko the unicorn will save us all."
The two boys were silent.
"All hail Koko," Naya continued.
The two boys stayed silent.
"I SAID ALL HAIL KOKO!"
"A-All hail Koko..."
-/_\-
Preview of the Next Chapter:
Chapter Five: In Which There Was Plot
Sasuke discreetly fingered his kunai and Naruto went on fuming. "THERE IS NO WAY YOU'RE MAKING ME READ THE WHOLE GODDAMN SHINOBI MANUAL YOU GODDAMN GOT THAT GODDAMMIT?!"
"That was way too many goddamns in one sentence," Sasuke muttered.
"DO I LOOK LIKE I GODDAMN CARE?"
-/_\-
Boom, chapter four is done! It's a little shorter than I wanted it to be, but that's necessary. Also, chapter five is already written. The way I operate, though, I won't publish a chapter until the one after it is written. Chapter five is pretty long and a lot less funny. It's plot, though, and that's necessary.
Also, there are probably a lot of mistakes in this chapter. I'll go through and edit it later.
Hope you all liked it! Remember to Vote and Comment! Until next time, this is SSSRHA2, signing out!