[ cнapтer тwenтy-ғoυr ➛ ѕтarт ]
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"Y'know, you really suck," Jaemin declared, sitting on his bed and leaning against the wall, idly looking over at Jeno.
It was a weekend, and the younger had somehow found the will to ditch watching youtube videos or Netflix to finish his homework right after classes finished on Friday. The older wasn't as lucky and was left with completing a lab assignment that he had "accidentally" tossed out the window when it was handed to him.
"You swallow," Jeno replied easily, eyes flicking from his phone to his lab and back. He sure as hell wasn't going to do the actual lab, so he had expertly looked on google for the answers, knowing exactly what search query to type so he wouldn't waste time with useless websites.
"You regurgitate."
"You--" Jeno then made a face at his paper, registering what the younger said. "Ew, that's gross, who the hell pukes out cum? You either suck it up and swallow it or not have it anywhere near your mouth in the first place, that's a basic rule of sex, how uneducated are you?"
"Not as uneducated as you," Jaemin confidently shot back, smirking. "And you would puke it out 'cause you're fucking nasty. And a sex n00b."
"Salami girl begs to differ."
"Salami girl would sell the left side of her vagina to have you to throw up in her asshole."
Finally putting his pen down, Jeno looked at the younger with an unamused expression. "I hate how correct you are."
The caramel-haired threw a wink and raised his hand to flip his imaginary hair like the queen he was but almost fell off his bed when his phone began ringing. Stifling his laughter, Jeno watched as the younger's eyebrows shot up at the caller ID.
"Hola hola-- wait, what?!" Jaemin screeched, sending Jeno into further hysterics. "What the fu-- sorry, my bad, didn't mean to speak the unholy language-- but-- who when how why-- Mom!"
Sighing, the younger dropped his phone, looking regretfully at the older who managed to recover enough from his fit to ask, "What'd she say?"
"My birth giver's gonna ground me from Fortnite," Jaemin whined, pouting in anguish. "Like what the hell?!? In Stray Kids' relay dance for 'My Pace', Felix literally traded dabbing for the Fortnite Orange Justice dance, therefore, it's a sign from God that Jisoos compels me to play Fortnite!"
"Okay, but 'My Pace' is such a masterpiece, they do the Pennywise dance twice in the choreo. Twice. Like my favorite girl group. Or like ooh aah ooh aah."
"Hiya Georgie, I'm Pennywise the crackhead clown, want some pop-pop-pop-porn?!
"I'm demon like I-T--"
"Yooooo, 'Ddu-du Ddu-du' Japanese version had some fine ass raps, my ultimate married queens Jennie and Lisa. Served. And. Delivered!"
Jeno shook his head. "Well, the real ultimate queen is Jun from BgA. And I'm very heartbroken because they haven't had a comeback in two years, and Jun and Justin's relationship is my oxygen, they're the cutest hoes. If they disband I'll Dong Saya Dae out of this world."
"Jun from Seventeen cries in the background."
"Minghao from Seventeen fucks him to make him feel better."
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With only three weeks to go until the summer holidays, an atmosphere of anticipation was shared among every student. Every teacher had given up on trying to gain their students' undivided attention, while the students themselves just counted the minutes and hours and days away until freedom.
Donghyuck was rarely around to act like his usual devilish self, dedicating all his time to being with Mark. He clung on to the older more than usual, giving kisses or constantly calling, behavior that was normal for him as it had always been his official duty to annoy Mark as much as possible. But these days, the Canadian boy was hardly bothered by it, clinging right back.
The youngest of the group had regained his ordinary friendship status with Chenle, the two pulling stunts and frustrating the hell out of others, as usual. There still presented the issue of Chenle's supposed relationship with Renjun, but Jisung hadn't done anything about it. He still hadn't confronted Chenle about the strange, questionable conversation he overheard, choosing to ignore it and just be content to be with his partner in crime.
Renjun was disappointed.
And Jeno and Jaemin continued sharing their odd bond, arguing and swearing, words laced with hidden affection.
The Dreamies had calm chemistry, no extreme drama having happened recently.
Until juan day.
Classes had been suddenly canceled, news about a student almost setting the staff room kitchen on fire. The entire building could have burned down and been reduced to ashes, so every teacher was paged to a meeting to discuss who the culprit could have been, and what safety measures, if necessary, should be installed or taken upon as precautions.
Donghyuck had smiled more than usual that day.
Leaving from math class when all the teachers had been called away, Jeno and Jaemin were sprinting down the hall, swerving and weaving through other throngs of students to win their race.
When the caramel-haired reached their finish line, one of the side doors to the school that had a paved path leading directly to the boys' dormitory, he whooped and jumped excitedly, grinning mockingly at the other.
Jeno rolled his eyes when he reached the door only moments later, scowling good-naturedly at Jaemin when the younger announced, "You're a fuckin loser!"
"I ain't no loser, oetori, sen cheokhaneun geopjaengi--"
"You ain't a winner either," Jaemin smiled, opening the door to let the pair outside as they began strolling to their dorm. "YG gives them less attention than Jin has lines but they're still cooler than you."
"That hurt. I felt that. Right in my di--"
"JENO HOEPPA!!"
The said male's already light skin paled further, and he looked alarmingly at the younger who began guffawing when he saw the girl running to them and tripping, falling on the grass in front of the two boys.
"Fuck my life," she muttered and stuck up her middle finger to the sky as she dusted herself off. But when she looked up at Jeno, her face stretched into a wide grin. "Did you like my gift? Think of it as an early birthday present!"
The older's face was a dead-pan. "Bitch, my birthday was two months ago."
Scowling, she launched into her response, "Well you know what, fuck you, my birthday's on Halloween except my great-great-great-grandma decided to fucking die some years ago so now everyone cares about that hoe thinking she's gonna haunt them and either prank their dumbasses or give them free crack, no one cares that I was shoved out of my mom's vagina that day."
"See Jeno, I told you she was a queen," Jaemin nudged the older and nodded respectfully back at the girl. "No hetero though."
"What's your name?" Jeno sighed in defeat.
She winked. "Just call me yours."
"I'd rather get fucked by Jaemin. And I'm a top."
Hands on her hips, the girl rounded on the mentioned younger, "Jaemin, back the fuck off my-- hey wait, you're hella cute, I wouldn't mind if you would call me yours too."
Jaemin almost choked on air.
Thankfully he didn't die as salami girl continued talking to Jeno. "Anyway, why don't you just love me? Is it because you're bisexual so I have double the competition? I'm willing to fight for your salami-- swallow-- Siri, tell me 'love' in Korean."
Jeno cringed. "Even if I wanted to date you I couldn't."
"What?!" she screeched, looking up from her phone that she had actually taken out to ask Siri her question. "Why?!"
"I'm, uh," Jeno panicked. All he wanted was to go back to the dorm, but he was stuck here, Jaemin laughing at him and Salami girl acting desperate and thirsty. "I'm already dating someone--"
Salami girl dropped her phone onto the pavement as her mouth hung open to scream, "WHAT THE FUCK?!?! WHO, HOW?! WHICH HOE DO I NEED TO SUE!? WHO THE HELL IS GETTING THE PRIVILEGE OF HAVING YOUR LOVE AND FUCKS AND OH MY FUCK TELL ME WHO—"
"Not you," the raven-haired answered.
Staring blankly at the older, Salami deflated, "Yeah, thanks for that enlightening life-changing information, I didn't go to school for ten years to not figure out that much by myself, just tell me who the hoe—"
"It's-- uhm," hurriedly, Jeno looked around, remembering Jaemin's advice. "It's Jaemin. We're dating."
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[ cнapтer тwenтy-ғoυr ➛ end ]
[a/n]: dry ass chapter lol