*Alex’s POV*
It had been a week on tour, and it was still all too surreal to me. I had gone from having nobody who cared about me, to being stuck in a Foster Home and school where I was tormented every day to playing music, my dream, in front of crowds who not only knew who I was but loved me, and on top of all that I got the best family in the world.
But the more I thought about it, the more all of the negative thoughts started to hit me. Lately I just felt like maybe whatever happened to grant that wish for me to be a part of a family like theirs was a mistake.
I mean look at all of them, they're all so talented, good looking, perfect and sweet. Then look at me. I'm just a gangly 12 year old who has too pale skin and frizzy brown hair. And I'm useless I can never play or sing like any of them can, and it's a wonder to me that anyone could believe we're really related anyway.
My reverie was broken when I heard footsteps rushing toward me.
“What ya doing kiddo!” Reid asked, throwing his arms around my shoulders.
I jumped from where I was sitting on their, I mean our tour bus alone on the couch in the back room, pretending to watch some movie.
“Thinking.” I say, and that’s when I notice that my voice is raw, from all of those images, the pain, feeling like I’d be better off gone, feeling like I’d never be wanted anywhere, and that’s when I realize I had been crying, and for some reason I just start sobbing.
Reid’s arms drop like he had been shot, and I hear shouting and running as Reid pulls me into his lap.
“What’s wrong Lex?” He asks me, and I hear the door burst open as I sob louder, knowing that it’s Kimberly and Neil.
“What did you do?!” Kimberly shouts at Reid as she pulls me from him and into her lap, hugging me protectively.
“Nothing! I don’t know! She was crying when I came in, and when I asked her what was wrong she just started crying harder!” Reid explained, sounding frustrated.
All of their eyes trained on me a Kimberly rubbed my back as I cried.
“What’s wrong baby girl?” She asked and they all looked anxious, as they have lately.
The first few shows went well, but I was still getting the hang of it. There were times they’d come to tickle me or play, and I'd back away terrified, and they’d look so hurt. And then there were the few times in the concerts lately that I’ve played the wrong chord or done the wrong thing. The three of them had been assuring me that it was fine, that I’d get used to it, but I’ve heard fans saying I’m ruining the band, that they don’t see why or how I’m part of it with how my siblings are so talented, and honestly I agree with them.
It’s all of this that finally cause me to snap, and before I know what I’m doing I push Kimberly’s hands away and leap out of her grasp.
“Alex what..” Kimberly starts to ask, but I’ve already run out the door. I don’t know where I’m going, and I don’t have much time because I know all of them are faster than me.
Suddenly I see some sort of gator or golf cart sitting there with the keys in the ignition.
I leap in and turn the key, gunning the engine. Who cares if it’s pouring rain and I’ve never driven before?!
“ALEX PERRY! DON’T YOU DARE!!” I hear a scream, but ignore it as I floor the pedal desperate to get away from my too perfect kind of family, to get away from all the thoughts that I’d never be enough, knowing that I was just a dumb kid nobody wanted, and even the Perry’s didn’t have a choice, and I knew they’d get sick of me soon too. Just like everyone else.
I can hear shouting and screaming rapidly disappearing in the distance as both the pouring rain and tears obscured my vision completely. All I heard was a squealing and suddenly the steering wheel was jerking out of control, hurting my hand as the small vehicle went out of control. I was panicking when there was suddenly a huge impact, and I was thrown out of the seat and into the tree as well. My world went fuzzy and I felt blood running down my face.
I felt my phone constantly buzzing in my pocket but I suddenly started to feel really tired. My eyes started to close right there in the mud, my head still resting against the tree. Though I swear I could hear screaming before everything went black.
I heard incoherent muttering, and I felt myself moving slightly as someone moved.
I opened my eyes a fraction to see that I must be in a car. I realized that I was draped across Kimberly and Neil’s laps, and just from their body language I can tell that they were NOT happy.
“What was she thinking?!” Kimberly hisses, her voice full of fury.
“I wish I knew! What a dumb thing to do!” Neil seethes.
I wince at their tones, which seems to alert them that I’m awake. Crap I am definitely in for it!
“Alex?” Kimberly snaps. I close my eyes again, wishing that her arms had not wrapped around me to hold me in place.
“Alex look at me!” Kimberly snaps again, and I reluctantly open my eyes as the car stops, and she jerks me to my feet, her hand tight on my arm a she all but drags me back onto the bus.
I am still sticky with blood and mud but they don’t care as the 3 of them push me into one of the kitchen chairs.
They all glare at me, and it is then I know I made a huge mistake.