Remus smiled at her gently. Grateful for something new to wear, he took the shirt and jeans to change into. The faint scent of Sirius comforted him. A gift from the girl he loved. A gift from one of his best friends. He could feel a cocky grin from Sirius and James as he slipped on the jacket. Lily's gentle eyes, laughing with them. Peter's calm demeanor, but kind grin, before he had betrayed them. All of them.
It still stung like a fresh wound, blooding oozing from the cut. Salt being rubbed into it. Remus pushed those thoughts to the back of his mind and stepped out to meet a smiling and laughing Tonks, her hair a gentle mix of pink and chocolate.
"You look great." she chuckled.
Remus attempted to strike a pose, as Sirius would have done, but failing miserably, "Thanks."
Tonks erupted into laughter. Remus joined her. He'd do absolutely anything to hear her lovely laugh. So gentle and loud at the same time. Remus didn't think he could imagine a life without her. Tonks attempted to make her way over to him to hug him, but ended up slipping instead, somehow managing to knock over the umbrella stand, hit her foot on the coffee table and stumbling into his arms.
"I didn't fall..." she spoke, slightly mystified.
Remus chuckled, "No, you didn't." Her strap began to slip down, and Remus, like a gentleman, pulled it back up.
Her eyes lit up, and she disappeared into a different room to grab something. She came back clutching a book.
"Have you ever read some muggle fairytales?"
Remus didn't want her to know that he'd read every single one so she's end up reading them to him. Or at least with him.
With a grin, he replied, "No, not at all."
~oOo~
Tonks knew he was lying. The glint in his eyes. The smile. But she couldn't resist grinning back. This man was an absolute gentleman and sweetheart.
Her being a metamorphmagus wasn't always beneficial. The men she'd been with over the years had only wanted her for reasons other than love. They didn't appreciate her personality, but her looks and the way she could change her appearance. Only to fill their deepest fantasies.
But Remus was a gentleman. He never asked her to change. Instead of wild kisses and gestures, he preferred simple moments and loving hugs. Instead of studying the fact that the strap of her shirt with slipping down her arm, he fixed it without hesitation nor a passionate determination for romance. She wished all men were like that.
She felt him bury his nose into her shoulder, then glancing down at the book that sat in her lap. As she read to him, he seemed a lot more antsy than usual. Fidgeting with his hands, constantly tapping his feet on the wooden planks of her floor. Occasionally snuggling tighter against her shoulder.
The tale she read was the story of a girl who could look past the differences. And saw the person she fell in love with for who he truly was. She had convinced him that he could be good. Remus seemed interested in the story. However, they only ended up reading that one. Beauty and the Beast was quite a long story.
Oh no, she thought as she glanced outside, realizing what time it was.
"Remus... look, please." Tonks gestured to her open window, who had the light to the full moon on display.
He got up so abruptly it scared her. She glanced at him in pity, but she smiled at him in love and concern.
"I have to go." he said curtly, "Thank you."
Remus ran out the door. Tonks sighed, knowing this pleasure wouldn't last. She bookmarked the old and dusting book where they were. The amusing part was that they were about to read the part where Belle leaves to see her father. She was about to hurry into her room to tuck the book away, but noticed a little something near her door. A note the size of a Post-It.
Instead of gentle and loving words from him, a charcoal drawing sat on the little piece of paper. Tonks picked it up to study it. A little flower blossoming from a book. She wondered when Remus had time to draw this, seeing as it was extremely well drawn. Maybe at one of the Order meetings during Snape's lectures? Probably.
She almost missed what was holding the note from flying out her doorway. A chocolate kiss, wrapped in delicate silver. Deciding to save both the chocolate and the drawing, she smiled and tucked them away in one of her boxes.
It contained other notes and gifts she had received over the years. Most of the recent ones were from Remus. Others were from old friends from her years at Hogwarts, sent in the mail. (It was an old and very secret Hufflepuff tradition.) The ones from Remus were quotes from his favorite books or little poems. This was the first drawing he'd left her after a visit. And he used to visit very often. Used to.
Order meetings became quite distressing for Tonks. She painfully watched as Remus willingly threw himself into missions that would lead to his death. He could barely look her in the eye anymore. Didn't he love her? Didn't those nights of him showing up at her door wounding and hurt count for anything at all? What had changed inside him? She really thought he loved her. She left that meeting fuming and upset
Why did he think his actions were noble and chivalrous? Did he think he was sparing her feelings? If anything, he was causing he more pain than she had expected. It nearly drove her to insanity. She knew he'd never willingly spend even seconds of laughter and memories with her again. She knew he'd end up walking into his grave because of his utter refusal to see her.
She wasn't aiming to convince him to fall in love with her, she hoped to convince that he was good enough to be with someone who loved him. Not the monster and horrifying being he thought he was.