It was the day after we found out London had left the ship. I was at the juice bar with Caleb along with Zack and Bailey.
"It's all my fault London left," Bailey sighed sadly.
"No, it's not. She hated a lot of things on this boat besides you," Zack said trying to make her feel better.
I frowned at him. What he said wasn't any better at all.
"That came out wrong," he corrected himself.
Cody came over to us with a drink in his hand.
"Here Bailey. This'll cheer you up. I ordered it just for you. It's a seaweed smoothie with a broccoli boost," he smiled.
Caleb and I stared at Cody with a disgusted expressions on our faces.
"I think my brain is puking," I shuddered feeling mentally sick.
"Same," Caleb nodded.
"We want her to cheer up, not throw up," Zack frowned.
I glanced around and saw Uncle Marion and Miss Tutweiller pacing in a couple of directions. Ever since finding London's note and her taking off, they've been freaking over finding her. They both bumped into each other.
"Oh! Would you pace to your right?" my uncle frowned at my teacher.
"This is my right! And if you meant your right then you should've said your right, then I would've done it right! Alright!" she rambled which I figured she did whenever she got nervous.
That second, Uncle Marion's phone rang.
"Finally!" he sighed as he pulled it out from his pocket and answered it, "Yes, Captain. I know you are very busy with something extremely important... Oh, really? Miniature golf. That's wonder..."
Uncle Marion reacted to the last response lively to Captain Lunsford. Turns out they both like to golf or miniature golf per se.
"Oh really? You two-putted the clown hole?" my uncle asked getting interested.
"Oh, big deal! Everyone knows you bank it off the big shoe!" Miss Tutweiller frowned into the phone speaker, which Uncle Marion pulled away from her.
"Tell him we need to stop at Parrot Island," she demanded.
My uncle nodded at her with a serious expression and spoke into the phone, "Captain Lunsford., you need to turn this ship around. We're missing a student."
It sounded like the Captain replied that he didn't care and that he wasn't going to turn around.
"Well here's why you should care. That student is London Tipton!" Uncle Marion pointed out.
The minute he said her name, the ship's foghorn blared and the boat itself turned around causing everyone to lose their balance. Caleb and I held on to the countertop as Cody lost his balance and spilled the smoothie on Uncle Marion. Zack and Bailey started laughing. Caleb and I wound up joining them.
"Told you my smoothie would cheer her up," Cody smiled at Zack.
⚓
I was in the lobby with the class as Miss Tutweiller did a head count to make sure everyone was present. Uncle Marion was trying to calm the passengers down who all were upset about the unexpected stop at Parrot Island. I overheard an elderly lady tell my uncle that she'd rather swim in her birthday suit.
Not a pretty sight to see! I thought.
Plus, I was dressed for the excursion which was just a pair of shorts and red loafers and an Avengers-themed t-shirt. And I had pulled my hair back into a ponytail remembering that tropical places can get hot and humid. I had packed my backpack with a note and sketchbook, a couple of pens and pencils, my wallet, sunglasses and my camera, and some other necessities.
"Okay and the whole class is here, except for Zack Martin," Miss Tutweiller said looking surprised.
"Get used to that," Cody nodded.
"HERE!" Zack shouted approaching our teacher from behind, which startled her so that she dropped her notecards.
"Sorry. I overslept," he apologized.
"We were in biology class," I stated.
"Exactly."
"Anyway, this unscheduled stop to look for London on this tropical island presents us with a unique educational opportunity," Miss Tutweiller explained trying to distract everyone else from feeling upset about the detour.
"We're gonna learn how to surf!" Zack exclaimed doing a surfing pose.
"Yeah!" Woody smiled and he too did a surfer pose, "Kowabunga! Hang eleven!"
"It's hang ten!" I corrected him.
"Not when you got eleven toes."
I stared at Woody with a grossed-out expression.
"You got six toes on one foot?" Caleb asked as he too felt grossed out.
"Nope! Eight and three," Woody replied.
I made a mental note to myself to never see him wearing sandals or flip-flops!
Cody and Bailey and the rest of us went over to the other side of the class to avoid Woody.
"I meant an opportunity to study the history of the island," Miss Tutweiller clarified, "Now, Parrot Island was colonized by--,"
"By the British. At the tail end of the Age of Exploration," Bailey interrupted her.
"Well to be more precise in--."
"1762. Wednesday. Around lunch," Cody cut her off.
"Thank you," Miss Tutweiller nodded already feeling annoyed.
I also made another mental note to try and avoid tours where Cody and Bailey would just interrupt the guide like they knew more than anyone else.
"Well, let's take a look at this beautiful, lush paradise," our teacher said and we all walked out onto the deck to get a good look at the island.
However, a barren colorless island was present instead of a beautiful tropical island with exotic birds flying everywhere.
"Whoa! I got more green between my seventh and eighth toe!" Woody remarked.
All of us took a large step back away from him, again feeling grossed out.
The ship docked at the port and we made our way into the island town and had a look around. Again, I expected to find various birds flying and perched everywhere, but nothing.
"Now the reason this island is a popular tourist destination," Miss Tutweiller explained but stopped when we heard the wind blowing and dogs barking from a distance.
"Or was. Is because of the rare parrot species, Poicephalus insulus," she added.
"Which was not indigenous to these islands," Cody spoke up.
"It was introduced to this habitat by explorers on their way back from the New World," Bailey jumped in.
"Cody, Bailey, you're teaching my class. Again," Miss Tutweiller reprimanded them once again annoyed.
"Sorry ma'am," Cody apologized.
"My point is, that this parrot is best known for its beautiful plumage and unique mating call. Ha! Beat ya!"
Our teacher felt better after her remark.
"She left out, eats guava seeds," Bailey muttered to Cody.
Miss Tutweiller glared at her causing Bailey to shut up.
"Now that we're ashore, we operate on the buddy system, so choose your partner," our teacher suggested.
Caleb and I turned to each other.
"Partner up?" he asked.
"Yep!" I nodded.
I glanced around and saw Zack and Cody linking arms around Bailey.
"C'mon buddy!" the twins smiled in unison.
"I call dibs!" Cody remarked yanking Bailey over to him.
"No, I saw her first!" Zack argued pulling her near him.
"Uh, guys! I'm not the last slice of pizza!" she called and they stopped their little tug of war.
I also noticed that Woody was the only one without a partner as he stood near Miss Tutweiller. Uncle Marion arrived shortly on the search for London.
"Hey, Woody! Wanna come with us?" Caleb asked.
Woody eagerly ran over to us. I felt bad about my reaction to him earlier when he expressed his abnormal feet. So I decided to try and get to know Woody better.
⚓
Time passed. There wasn't anything worth taking a picture of. Caleb and I met up with Zack, Cody, and Bailey while Woody went off to find a restroom.
The twins were attempting to hit on Bailey. Cody expressed how the restroom was only half a coconut, which told me that there weren't any plumbing or running toilets.
Woody came around holding a newspaper.
"Actually. It's more comfortable than it looks. And those two-ply palm leaves--- surprisingly soft," he explained.
"TMI," I muttered.
That second, there was a snorting and squealing noise close by us. All of us looked and saw a small pig stuck in between a couple of plant pots.
"Look!" Bailey gasped and went towards it, "Where did that little piggie come from?"
I recalled that she grew up on a farm in Kansas and had a lot of animals, including pigs.
"That's what the doctor said when he saw my extra toe," Woody remarked.
"Are you stuck? Here I have something for you," Bailey bent over and pulled something out of her pocket, "You like nuts?" She fed the pig and noticed a rope close by, "Oh this rope will work as a leash."
Bailey placed the loop around the pig's neck and lead it out of the bush, "Aw, he's so sweet. He reminds me of---"
"Breakfast?" Zack guessed.
"Football?" Cody asked.
"Ya'll hush up!" Bailey frowned at the twins like they said a couple of bad words and continued, "He reminds me of my pet pig from back on the farm."
I bent over and let the pig smell my hand like I would to a dog. Turned out, it was friendly.
"Sir Snort-a-lot and I were best friends. Then one day I woke up and he wasn't there anymore. I got really worried, but Mama told me he moved to the big city."
Zack, Cody, Woody, Caleb, and I knew what her mother meant by the big city. Cody let out a soft whistle. Caleb and I glanced at each other telling one another that Bailey had no clue what it meant and none of us had the heart to say it.
"I'm gonna call you...Porkers!" Bailey said to the pig, "You like that name?"
Porkers let out a snortle which sounded like a happy one to me. Bailey sure had a sweet way with animals!
"Mr. Moseby is not back with London yet, and the boat leaves in an hour," Miss Tutweiller approached us with a worried expression, "Umm, I'm gonna go find them." She then walked away.
"Since it's partly my fault London left, I'll go look too," Bailey offered.
Zack and Cody went up to her and linked arms around her again offering to go along.
"Great! Then we'll use the buddy system. You guys go that way," she pointed forward and then pointed behind her, "And I'll go this way with Woody, Caleb, and Marley."
Bailey pulled Woody along with her and Porkers while Caleb and I followed them before Zack or Cody could complain.
⚓
After a little while of searching through town for London and Uncle Marion, Woody suddenly stopped noticing a pie stand, forcing us to stop.
"Do I smell coconut cream pie?" Woody asked himself like he had been dreaming for a while.
"The best on the island!" A man remarked set to hand him a plate with a slice of pie, "Just three dollars a slice."
"There's a dead fly on it!" Woody pointed at it.
"Two dollars a slice."
"Excuse me. We're looking for our friend, London Tipton," Bailey said.
"And for my uncle, Marion Moseby," I added.
"Ah! Yes. Right this way," the man nodded and pulled off his chef's hat, and turned from us, "Taxi!"
Bailey smiled at Woody, Caleb, and me delighted that he knew where to find London and my uncle. Somehow, I sensed that the man himself was completely off his rocker.
The same man turned back to us wearing a cowboy hat.
"Fancy a ride, guv'nor?" he asked in a British accent.
"Why are you wearing a cowboy hat?" Caleb asked staring at him.
⚓
"Welcome to the hoosegow!" the man who we found out was named Simms, greeted and slammed the cell door shut on us and pulled off the cowboy hat, and replaced it with a police hat. Where does this guy get his hats for living on an island?
"Wow, you're worst rescuers than Moseby," London remarked to us.
"Why are you locking us up?" Bailey asked in a confused manner.
"You can't arrest them for just knowing London," Uncle Marion reasoned.
"That's a good point," Simms nodded and noticed Porkers, and turned to Bailey, "Ah ha! Miss, I don't suppose you have a pig license?"
The rest of us groaned.
"A pig license?" Caleb wondered.
I just shrugged my shoulders.
"As a matter of fact, I do!" Bailey smiled as she pulled out her wallet from her pocket.
"Oh!" all of us raised our heads in astonishment.
"Here you go," Bailey handed Simms her license.
"Oh so you do," Simms said and read it over and found something, "Ah! Ah! I have something. This pig license is only valid in Kansas!" He handed it back to her.
"But wait---"
"Oh tell it to judge! Oh wait, you just did."
"Is there anything on this island you don't do?" Uncle Marion asked.
"I don't own the hat shop," Simms answered as he switched hats, "Pity. That guy makes a killing." He then left after that.
"I'm sure the Mad Hatter on this island is filthy rich from selling all those hats," I remarked randomly.
Porkers squeezed through the bars like it was no problem to him.
"Wait! I have an idea!" Bailey turned to all of us.
She called him back in. I handed her one of my pens and a notebook sheet and she wrote in it and taped it on Porkers' side and let him wander off to find Zack and Cody.
⚓
More time passed. I sat on the floor and pulled out my sketchbook and pencil and was drawing 'cause I was bored and tired. Woody was seated on the bench reading the newspaper. Caleb had his phone out trying to get some reception.
"None of this would've happened if you hadn't wanted me to room with Little Miss Cow Cake," London complained to Uncle Marion.
"It's cow pie. And now, instead of roommates, we're cellmates," Bailey corrected her, "Does that make you happy, Little Miss Covered in Diamonds?"
"Quite the comeback, Bails," I muttered.
"Could've been worse," Caleb shrugged.
"Is that an insult? Because that sounds pretty good to me," London smiled.
Just then, we heard a couple of voices arguing. All of us recognized them as Zack and Cody. They had probably found Porkers and the note. Uncle Marion had Woody get on his knees since the barred window was too high for him to reach. I slid my sketchbook and pencil back into my backpack knowing that we would be getting out soon.
"Oh just get up here!" Uncle Marion yelled at the twins.
"I knew my pig gram would work!" Bailey smiled at us, "It's how they delivered mail in Kettlecorn until 1995."
"Let me guess. Your phone is two cans and a string?" London asked sounding mean.
I glared at her.
"Mr. Moseby, how did you get up here?" Zack asked.
I guessed he was on top of Cody's shoulders.
"I'm standing on Woody," Uncle Marion replied.
"You could've taken your shoes off," Woody frowned in pain.
"How did you guys all wind up in there?" Zack asked.
"It's a long story," Uncle Marion stated.
"Could we save the chit-chat for later?" Cody groaned in pain.
"Yeah, I'm with Cody on that," Woody agreed.
"Look, you have to break us out of here. Did you bring the proper tools?" Uncle Marion asked.
"No. Unfortunately, the prison breakout store was closed," Cody responded.
My uncle sighed.
"That's an actual store?" Caleb asked astonished.
"Never knew such a thing existed," I shook my head.
"Improvise people! I haven't changed my outfit in four hours!" London exclaimed.
"Uh, Mr. Moseby?" Woody asked.
"Mm-hm?" my uncle nodded.
"If you're just kinda watching at this point. Do you think you could get off my back?!"
Uncle Marion jumped off of Woody, who looked relieved that he wasn't standing on his back anymore.
"You know, these bars seem a little bit lose," Zack stated, "I might be able to get in if I had a---"
"Crowbar?" Simms asked offering from out there.
"Exactly! Thanks!"
"You're quite welcome."
"Uh oh," mine and Caleb's eyes shot wide in unison.
Next thing, Zack and Cody ended up in the same jail cell with us.
"What part of rescuer-ing don't you understand?" London frowned at the twins.
I glanced at her and so did Caleb. London never did well in reading and grammar. Before, I tried explaining words to her like I was a human dictionary.
"All of it! It's either rescuer or rescuing!" Uncle Marion exclaimed.
"Well, you're not good at either-er," London back talked.
"Zack, whenever I pictured us in prison, I was always on the other side of the bars saying, 'Take the plea,'" Cody expressed to his twin.
That second, the foghorn blared and all of us groaned. Uncle Marion, Bailey, Woody, and Caleb stood near the bars while the rest of us sat down on the bench.
"Oh! The ship leaves in ten minutes," Uncle Marion moaned and then shouted, "Constable Simms! Constable Simms!"
Simms entered wearing what looked like workout clothes.
"I'm trying to teach a Pilates class!" he said like he was in the middle of something and turned around, "Work from your core, Gertrude! Feel the burn!" he shouted and shook his butt which made all of us avert our eyes from him.
"Simms, if you let us out of here now, I will arrange for Tipton Industries to make full reparations for scaring off the parrots and cutting down the trees," Uncle Marion suggested.
"What?" I gaped glancing at London realizing that her father was the cause of the whole mess on the island.
"That's what your father did?" Bailey asked turning to London, "That's terrible! I know how bad I'd feel if someone came to Kettlecorn and took all of the corn, and left us with just the kettle," Bailey turned to Simms, "No wonder you put us in jail."
"I don't think that's helping the situation here," Caleb shook his head at her.
"Ya think?" I glanced at him.
"Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to finish Pilates, perform a root canal, and conduct the orchestra for our little theatre production of Where Or Where Have Our Parrots Gone!" Simms frowned and left.
"Oh! That's it. We're all gonna die in here," Uncle Marion moaned after walking to the other side of the cell.
"Oh no," Bailey sighed sadly.
"I'll comfort you," Cody offered.
"I'll comfort her first," Zack frowned at his twin and both of them approached her.
Bailey sat down on the bench with Woody as Caleb and I sat crisscrossed on the floor.
"Look, we gotta work this Bailey thing out in a mature and rational way," Cody suggested to Zack.
"I couldn't agree more," Zack nodded at him, "Spitting contest!"
The twins turned and inhaled trying to gather saliva.
"Real mature guys!" I frowned shaking my head at them.
Fortunately, Uncle Marion stopped them and explained to them that Bailey wasn't looking for a relationship at that point since she hadn't gotten over her ex-boyfriend named Moose. I thought that was a strange name! My uncle got emotional from expressing it.
Zack agreed that Cody should be the one for Bailey expressing to him that she came with a lot of baggage and that he preferred girls with just a carry-on. I just shrugged it off and shook my head knowing Zack would soon move on to the next girl.
That minute, Porkers returned. Bailey at once got up.
"Porkers! We're saved!" she smiled as she got up on her feet.
"Why? Does he have a law degree?" Uncle Marion asked.
I mentally laughed at the thought of Porkers having gone through law school as I slid my backpack on.
All of us huddled at the cell door.
"No, but he can get the keys," Bailey answered and bent over, "Okay. Go to his desk, open the drawer, get the master keys, and bring them here to me," she instructed Porkers.
There was no point in doubting that he'd get what she told him since the pig itself was our only way out of the jail cell.
"Oh! And bring me a decaf non-fat latte with extra foam!" London added grinning.
"Bailey you can't possibly believe this animal understands you," Uncle Marion said doubting the whole thing.
Porkers went behind the desk.
"The keys are in the drawer on the left," Bailey informed him.
A drawer opened, but it was the wrong one.
"Not that drawer. The one on the left," she corrected him.
Porkers peeked out and made a snortle.
"Not you're left, my left!"
"That is the most interesting thing I've ever seen," Caleb commented seeing the pig's actions.
"I know right," I nodded.
"What about my latte?" London whined.
That second, a coffee machine operated surprising us.
"Oh! Forget the coffee! Bring the keys!" Uncle Marion shouted.
Porkers threw the keys at us and Bailey quickly caught them.
"Nice throw!" she commended the pig.
Bailey unlocked the door and Cody opened it and we all got out of the cell. The foghorn blared once again.
"Okay! We have five minutes. If we run, we can just make it," Cody suggested and we ran out the door.
"We're safe. I gotta stop and use the coconut!" Woody remarked.
"Just hold it until we get back to the ship!" I frowned at him.
"My latte!" London cried still standing.
Caleb and I grabbed her and ran.
"Hurry! We're almost to the ship!" Uncle Marion hollered as we ran through town towards the dock.
"Hey wait, wait, wait!" Bailey called out to us standing by a postcard stand and picked a card up, "Look at these postcards!"
Zack, Caleb, and I ran back to her. I noticed on that card had a picture of the island when it was tropical-covered with exotic birds flying all over.
"Look. you can send postcards from the next port!" Zack shouted.
"No I mean, look at how lush and beautiful this island used to be," she stated as London ran back to us.
Bailey had a point there.
"And now it's a dump! So let's get outta here," London said.
Both she and Zack tried pulling Bailey, but she wouldn't move.
"It's a dump because your father ruined it, and he should fix it," Bailey suggested as Cody, Woody, and Uncle Marion ran over to us.
"She has a point," I turned to London who looked at the postcard.
"Yeah," Caleb nodded in agreement.
"She's right. It's that kind of corporate greed that's destroying the environment," Cody stated.
"Wow. I mean this place really did used to be beautiful," London remarked with hints of guilt.
"Yes, and we can all be sad about it on the boat," Uncle Marion gestured us anxiously to get to the ship.
"And now that it's not beautiful, Daddy doesn't care anymore. Kind of like with his first four wives," London mentioned handing the postcard back to Bailey.
"You know London if you paid to replant the island may be the parrots would come back," Cody reasoned.
"And the islanders would be so grateful they might put your picture on their coins," I added.
London gasped in excitement, "Do you really think so?"
Bailey and I nodded at her.
"Then I could flip myself to decide which shoes to wear!" London smiled.
The sound of someone blowing a whistle made us jump and step back a bit as Simms approached us.
"Halt! You're surrounded!" he yelled like he had an army behind him.
"By just you?" Woody asked amusingly.
"Um, pretty much."
London pulled out her fuzzy pink wallet from her purse and approached Simms, "How 'bout I help you replant the trees by writing a check for ten million dollars?"
"That would work," Simms turned to her looking at her wallet.
She wrote the check and handed it to him.
"And feel free to use some of it to buy yourself some new pants," she suggested and we all took off running for the ship.
"Bon Voyage!" Simms called out and waved at us.
⚓
I sat across from London on the Sky Deck as Uncle Marion and Miss Tutweiller lectured her.
"London, we were worried sick about you. You're grounded!" Miss Tutweiller exclaimed.
"Technically, you can only give detention, I can ground," Uncle Marion stated to her and turned to London, "You're grounded!"
"And so is your helicopter pilot."
"Fine, I won't use my helicopter," London replied as my uncle headed back to work.
"Or your private submarine," Miss Tutweiller added.
"Take it back down boys," London spoke into her phone.
Our teacher walked away and London and I stood up.
"Well I guess I'm stuck here," London sighed at me.
"I know I know. With me as your roommate," Bailey said as she approached us.
"Yeah, that is depressing."
Bailey had a sad expression on her face.
"But London, she did get us outta that cramped jail cell," I reminded her.
"True," she nodded at me.
"So does that mean we're okay?" Bailey asked with hope.
"Sure. Maybe sharing a room won't be so bad. I'll be the big sister you never had."
"Actually, I have six big sisters. And three little ones."
"Your family reunions must be huge!" I commented to Bailey.
"Wow, your mom needs a hobby. Well come on you two, let's go down to the mall deck and buy a whole new wardrobe," London smiled at us.
"For me?" Bailey asked, "London you don't have to buy me a whole new wardrobe."
"I was talking about me."
"Then why do you need us?" I asked already aware of what she would say.
"Duh! Someone has to tell me how good I look," London replied, "Come on."
She linked arms with Bailey and me and made out way down to the shopping deck.