Deadpool's Point Of View
Placing my hands on my hips, I look around at the guys. "Who's got a boat?" I ask.
You are not taking the hellicarrier!
Yeah, you're right...it's overrated anyway!
May I suggest the X-Jet or otherwise known as the Blackbird?
About most of the guys roll their eyes. "C'mon!" I complain. I look over at Logan. "C'mon! Can I borrow the ol' Wolf for a day?" I ask. Logan rolls his eyes at me. I look over at Cable. "Wade, haven't you...I don't know...own a yacht?!" Cable asked, obviously annoyed. "Firstly, one time thing, second, the world literally went to dust, third, I'm broke." I stated. "Wait! What's that I smell?" Logan asks then, sniffs the air around me. "Yeah.....yeah! That smells like bull." Logan commented.
Oh shit...
Abandon ship.
"Wait....." I put a hand on my chin, stopping to think. I racked my brain for a solution.
Maybe we can logically rent a yacht?
We have to pay the damages done.
"What's Xavier doin' this summer?" I ask. "I dunno.......I've heard rumors that he's going on his yacht-" "Lucky bastrad..." I mutter. "Good luck Wade." Logan spat, crossing his arms across his chest. I turned away from them and walked away from the group of guys. I really had my hope up but, I have another idea. I'll just take Xavier's fancy smacey yacht for the fishin' trip. Besides he wouldn't...mind!
Yeah wisecrack, we understand.
I look over at the row of docked yachts. The sunlight reflected off of a man's bald head. The man sat down, his back facing me. The structure of the chair seemed all too familiar to me. Then, it hit me. "Xavier...ol' friend!" I call out, turning my attention to him. I walked up to his yacht, knocking on the side. Xavier turned his wheelchair around. He took a sip from a glass of water. "Wade...Wade...Wade? God, it's...it's been so long!" Xavier stammered. "Say...you planning on doing anything with this boat?" I ask him, pointing to the yacht. "No...not really..." Xavier mutters. "Good! 'Cause I've got a date! So...ya mind if...I?" I bite my lip. "Well yes but, I'm coming with you........you never know what what you'll be up to..." Xavier responded, whispering the last part to himself.
Hallijeuh!
I nodded and raced to the parking lot. Y/n leaned against the Pool Mobile with his/her arms crossed across her/his chest. S/he tilted his/her head to the side. "Well...we got a date with the lake!" I announce. Y/n's eyes wandered over to the f/c fishing rods. I picked up the two fishing rods, resting them on my shoulders. We walk over to the yacht. "Hey Mr. Baldi!" I call out to Xavier. He looks over his shoulder with a smile forming on his lips. Y/n smiles and waves at Xavier as a kind response. Y/n and I come to a halt. "Charles Francis Xavier.....this is Y/n M/n L/n." I say, pointing to Y/n. Xavier turns his chair around, facing us both. He reaches his hand out with Y/n grabbing it, them both shaking hands. "You're a popular topic for the X-Men." Xavier states. "Oh! Really nothin' special 'bout me!" Y/n says back. Xavier looks over at me. Y/n follows his gaze. "Wade has called us several times asking for advice." Xavier says, smiling wide. Y/n starts to blush.
Oh, oh, oh!
Exposed!
I take out a gun from my hostlers and point it at my head.
If I'm going down, you're going down with me!
Wait...
Wade!
Y/n looks at me in horror. Xavier doesn't really care. "Pew!" I announce, pulling the trigger. A loud boom erupted into the air. The world around me went black as I fell down. A deafening ringing filled my ears with a throbbing pain filling my brain.
Damn it Wade!
Owwww...
At least it saves us from public embarrassment.
Sigh.
I open my eyes to see Y/n by my side, bawling her/his eyes out. "Jesus kid!" I exclaim. I sit up as Y/n starts to wipe his/her eyes. "Owwww..." I cry out. "I bought some aspirin down at United Drug." Xavier comments. "Incase we shake apart and want a brand new start!" I add. Y/n and Xavier stare at me funny. "Have you seen Hamilton?" I ask.
♪Hello darkness my old friend♪
This is taking foreeeeeeveeeerrrr!
I stand up and put my hands on my hips. "Start the car, I know a whoppee spot!" I announce. I hop over the yacht's railing and land on the yacht's floor. It squeaks every time I move. I look over my shoulder to see Y/n walk on. Y/n looks around, admiring all the fancy smacey tech. "And take the ol' coot with ya!" I hear a female voice call out. Xavier rolls onto the yacht in his wheelchair. He goes around untying several ropes. "You're welcome to make yourself at home." He says, directly to Y/n. Me? Not so much. "Just don't break anything." Xavier threatened me. Xavier rolls on over to the steering wheel. He flips a few switches causing the yacht to rumble. The yacht drifts forward to the lake.
♪Lazy yellow moon comin' up tonight♪
♪Shinin' through the trees♪
♪Crickets are singin' and lightning bugs♪
♪Are floatin' on the breeze♪
♪Baby get ready♪
I lean over the ledge, looking into the water. The water splashed against the yacht's side. I look over at Y/n with her/his fingers all tied up in the fishing lines.
When did we decide to rhyme?
Extra brownie points!
I walk over to Y/n, putting a hand on my hip. "Need help with that?" I ask. Y/n lifts her/his head up with a awkward smile plastered across her/his lips. "Uh..." Y/n looks down at her/his fingers. "I know a thing or two." I state. "If you say so..." Y/n whispers. I knelt down in front of Y/n, taking a fishing rod from Y/n's hands. "Ow!" Y/n cries out. I drop the rod, sending it falling to the floor. I examined Y/n's hand, noticing the pressure of the string around the fingers. I suck in a breath. I dig a hand into one of my pouches, pulling out a pair of kiddie scissors. "Ummm...give me your hand." I order. "What?!" Y/n exclaims. "Or...we'll chop off that hand and feed it to the fishes." I add with sarcasm. "You're joking!" Y/n yells, pulling her/his hand away from me. "I would be if ya were a daredevil." I say. Y/n hesitated then looks down at his/her hands. "F-F-Fine...Fine! Fine..." Y/n brought back his/her hand back to me. "Let's hope we got more string baby." I respond. I spread the scissors wide and begin to cut through the strings. I discover the bruises left on Y/n's hands. I look up at Y/n who looked uncomfortable. I tear apart the final string of the fishing line. I give Y/n a thumbs up. "Two swords with maxium effort." I say.
The yacht comes to a halt. I look over at Xavier. Xavier doesn't say anything. I grab my fishing rod and walk to the edge of the boat. I do a good ol' swing and cast it out. I look over my shoulder to see Xavier wheel on over to Y/n. They began having a distant conversation.
I refuse to sit here and not eavesdrop!
Well, it's your funeral.
I felt a tug on the fishing rods and looked out at the lake. I could see the bob bobbing up and down in the water.
♪Across the field where the creek turns back♪
♪By the old stump road♪
♪I'm gonna take you to a special place♪
♪That nobody knows♪
♪Baby get ready, ooh♪
♪You and me going fishing in the dark♪
I think it's best for some ol' show tunes.
I locked eyes with something underneath the water. Something quite large. But I dismissed it as another large fish.
♪You and me going fishing in the dark♪
♪Lying on our backs and counting the stars♪
♪Where the cool grass grows♪
♪Down by the river in the full moon light♪
♪We'll be fallin' in love in the middle of the night♪
♪Just movin' slow♪
Another tug from the water. I didn't mind.
♪Stayin' the whole night through♪
♪Feels so good to be with you♪
♪Spring is almost over and the summer's come♪
♪And the days are gettin' long♪
♪Waited all winter for the time to be right♪
♪Just to take you along, baby get ready♪
A strong force pulled me over the ledge. I looked over at Y/n and Xavier. "Yo! A bit of help over here!" I called out to them. Unfortunately...I felt a strong force pull me in closer. "Gah!" I exclaimed and became thrown into the water. "Man overboard! Man overboard! Man overboard!" I yelled out. I began splashing around to attract their attention. Then, the same strong force pulled me along with it. I brought my feet up onto the water, leaning back on my ankles. I tightened my grip onto the fishing rod, never wanting to let go. I looked over at Y/n and Xavier, still continuing their bullshitty conversation! "Hey!" I yelled, waving at them. Unfortunately, they didn't notice me. And even more bad news, the fish and I were circling the yacht. I continued to yell out for them. I let out a sigh. Y/n looked over in my direction, a look of horror on her/his face. "Hey babe." I say, waving. "Wade!" Y/n calls out, running to the ledge. I roll my eyes at Y/n. "'Bout time! I thought I drown overnight! Not that I really can!" I announce. Y/n looked over at Xavier. "What are we gonna do?" Y/n asks. I felt water start to leak into my suit. I look down to see water coming down to my ankles.
♪And it don't matter if we sit forever♪
♪And the fish don't bite♪
♪Jump in the river and cool ourselves♪
♪From the heat of the night♪
♪Baby get ready, ooh♪
The motherfucking fish decided to dive downward into the cold water. I looked up to see the sunlight fading away with sound becoming muffled all around.
♪You and me going fishing in the dark♪
♪Lying on our backs and counting the stars♪
♪Where the cool grass grows♪
♪Down by the river in the full moon light♪
♪We'll be fallin' in love in the middle of the night♪
♪Just movin' slow♪
I lost my grip on the fishing rod with it slipping through my hands. I looked all around me to see darkness. But, no supscious fish.
Wait...
Something smells...fishy!
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!
Now you're just being mean!
I felt a jab in my back, knocking the air out of me. "Owwww!" I gurgled. I looked around as whatever did that, made me pretty pissed. I felt bubbles come in contact with me. I looked over and saw a shark with it's jaws wide open. The shark had a grin with it's wide open mouth. I waved at the shark and pulled out a grenade. I pulled off the pin and shoved it into the shark's mouth. I then plugged my ears with my fingers. A explosion came from the shark, launching my ass into the air.
♪Stayin' the whole night through♪
♪Feels so good to be with you♪
♪You and me going fishing in the dark♪
♪Lying on our backs and counting the stars♪
♪Where the cool grass grows♪
♪Down by the river in the full moon light♪
♪We'll be fallin' in love in the middle of the night♪
♪Just movin' slow♪
I fly up high with the water below me falling back down into the lake.
It's only a matter of time...
♪You and me going fishing in the dark♪
♪Lying on our backs and counting the stars♪
♪Where the cool grass grows♪
♪Down by the river in the full moon light♪
♪We'll be fallin' in love in the middle of the night♪
♪Just movin' slow♪
I felt gravity return back to me. I looked down to see the water below getting close and closer to my ass. "Ohhhhhh........this is gonna hurt." I said. I made contact with the water, feeling the impact of hitting concrerate. I swam through the dark waters, searching for the yacht. I reached a hand up and felt around in the air. Then, my head rammed into a large boat. I swim upward and break through to the surface. I wipe my eyes and look up to see Y/n and Xavier. I grab onto the ledge and pull myself up and over. I fell onto the floor and looked up at Y/n and Xavier. Then, I watched Y/n vomit.
"Honey! I'm home!" I announced.