Joslynn’s POV
Words cannot describe how pissed I am at Louis. What the hell was going through his mind when he said that? I’d sure like to know. I was currently sitting in my bedroom alone, ignoring all phone calls, texts, and knocks on my door. I wanted to be alone. I need to think without people bothering me.
Am I reacting how I should? I think so. I don’t think it’s fair of him to go say I was his girlfriend. He claims it was simply word vomit, but was it really? How does someone accidentally say they were dating someone? They don’t. And if they did, they could quickly fix what they had said, regardless if they are famous.
That’s what Louis should have done. He should have FIXED what he said; not leave it there and go along with what he said. Why would he just go along with it? Any normal person wouldn’t. He doesn’t realize this isn’t fair to me, the fans, or the media. He’s led on the fans and the media to something they’ve wanted to happen, and he’s left me in the spotlight, when it’s not possible for me to answer any of their questions.
How do I feel towards Louis? I’m absolutely furious. I don’t want to talk to him. I don’t want to see him. He doesn’t deserve to take me to prom anymore. This is a problem he hasn’t even tried to fix yet. It’s been three hours! And what has he done in those three hours? Has he called to schedule another interview or tweet or send something out to the media to correct his mistake? No. He’s done absolutely NOTHING to fix this. He’s leaving it as it is, as if he doesn’t want it fixed.
And, if it really is word vomit...why would he say I was his girlfriend, of all things? Is he saying it to make the fans happy and give the media what they want? Is he saying it because he thinks it’s some sort of sick joke?
Maybe he’s saying it because he wants it to be true.
Whoaaaa, what?! NO. Louis does NOT want me as his girlfriend....does he? I mean, we’re...best friends...but right now...what are we? Sure, I guess we’re still best friends, but he doesn’t deserve complete forgiveness and happiness from me, either. I’m extremely mad at him. Part of me just wants to go and run to him and just forget everything and forgive him. But, he doesn’t deserve that. No way. I can’t forgive him for a while. He’s REALLY screwed up. There’s no fixing this.
I sighed, covering my face with my hands and leaning back on my bed. Why is my life so complicated? Why is it so hard to be friends with a celebrity? Everything you do and say is either twisted by the fans and media or spread everywhere. There’s NO privacy. You can’t hide anything. It’s not worth it. You can’t hide things from the media. They’ll find out somehow. They just want a story; they don’t care about the actual people behind it. They want to be able to sell tons of copies of their magazines, and no better way to do that than twist everything famous people do.
When Louis fixes this...that is, IF he comes to his senses and fixes this, what is the media going to say? They’re going to twist everything and one of us will be the bad guy. The media simply wants to build people up to ruin them, and that’s what’s going to happen once Louis tells them the truth. But, if Louis doesn’t tell them the truth, I will.
I was pulled out of my thoughts by my phone beeping...again. Eden, McKenna, Jacqueline, and all of the boys have been texting me non stop, asking me to come out of my room or asking if I’m okay. Am I okay? No.
I looked down at some of my unanswered texts.
HAZZA- Hey, are you okay? Louis feels like total crap over what he said. He really didn’t mean it. He’s really torn up about this. You should talk to him.
Thanks, Harry. I’ll be okay. And I’ll think about it.
Nialler- Hey ur out of cookies and chips
Nialler- and soda and I wanna order pizza
Nialler- oh and um are you okay?
Wow, thanks, Nialler. I’ll be okay. Don’t worry about me. Feel free to order pizza. And stop eating all of my food.
Liam- r u alright? do u wanna talk? im all ears
Thanks, Li. I might take you up on that offer later. Thanks for caring. :)
Zayn- It’ll be okay. It’s just another bump on the rollercoaster of life!
Thanks, Zayn. I’ll be fine. :)
Jacqueline- Dude get your ass out of bed and forgive that douche. Yeah, he messed up because he’s sort of stupid, but he’s your best friend.
He has to fix this first.
Eden- Everything will be okay, love! We love you! -Eden and McKen
Thanks, girls :)
Then, I had tons from Louis....
Louis- Please open your door.
Louis- I’ll keep knocking.
Louis- I’ll text you until you answer.
Louis- I didn’t mean what I said. I told you that.
Louis- I’ll find a way to fix this.
Louis- Please talk to me.
Louis- Joslynn Marie Davis. Come talk to me. Please.
Louis- I take it you won’t be coming out for a while. Niall is going to order pizza and I ordered your favorite. You need to eat. And make sure you study for your exam tomorrow. Josie, you’re my best friend and you don’t know how sorry I am. I’ll find a way to fix this...somehow. You just need to give me time. I understand that you don’t want to talk to me, but when you’re ready to talk, please let me know. Love you, Josie.
I sighed, deciding not to reply to Louis. We couldn’t talk about this over text. How could he expect me to want to talk over a freaking text message? I sighed, deciding to ignore my incoming texts and I got on Twitter. I wonder how bad the drama is.
Loslynn and Louis and Joslynn were trending. If we were to ever date...I think I’d want a different couple name. What could it be? Jouis...Loulynn...okay...maybe Loslynn is better. Wait. I am seriously NOT thinking about this, am I? I don’t want to date him...I need to stop thinking about us as couple.
I got quite a few tweets saying people were happy for me. Then came the hateful ones.
Louislovr21: @JoslynnMarie go die bitch!! no one likes u! ur a slut! u dont deserve lou!!!!
wanderection1D: @JoslynnMarie dating @Louis_Tomlinson HAHAHAH he can do so much better than that bitch!!!
bieberdirectiongirl: @JoslynnMarie...god i never liked her
Yeah, Louis definitely hasn’t fixed things yet. That’s when I saw a tweet...one simple tweet that showed me that he may not want things fixed.
Louis_Tomlinson: Please stop sending @JoslynnMarie hate. Sending her hate won’t make me break up with her.
‘Won’t make me break up with her.’
That implied that we were dating. Louis wasn’t trying to fix this. He was making things worse.
Louis’s POV
I feel like shit. I’ve ruined everything. Joslynn is furious with me and refuses to come out of her room. What am I supposed to do? I know I needed to fix this...but for some reason...I don’t want to. I don’t know why I don’t want to fix everything...I feel like it wouldn’t fix how I feel if I were to say that Joslynn and I weren’t dating.
Because, for the first time...ever, I’m going to admit...I like the sound of Joslynn being my girlfriend. Why? I don’t know. I feel like this shouldn’t be happening. She’s my best friend, but one half of me is screaming at me saying that I want and need her as something more.
But, why? Ever since Joslynn and I were in diapers, we were best friends. I remember one day in the fourth grade, I was visiting California to see Joslynn, and she had some friends over. They all wanted to play Spin the Bottle. Except, I was the only guy, I was the only one who could spin the bottle, and we only played one round. It was immensely stupid. But, I agreed.
I spun the bottle once. Just once. And who did it land on? Joslynn. But, we were best friends. It was like...against the best friend code. So, what did we do? I went in to kiss her, but before my lips could meet hers, she turned her head and I kissed her cheek.
I felt...disappointed. And, I don’t even know why I did. Joslynn said, “Best friends aren’t allowed to like each other, and if you kiss me, then that means you would like me.”
Was I bummed? Yes. I wanted to kiss her. I don’t know why, but I wanted to. But, I never did. And, I’m starting to regret it, all these years later.
I was now laying on what was supposed to be my original bed, in a room with Harry. I was staring up at the ceiling, thinking. I really needed to fix this.
After a minute, I heard the door open, but I didn’t look up. I already knew who it would me.
“You gotta fix this, mate.”
“I know...but I don’t know how.” I said, turning towards Harry.
“Well, you know that tweet you sent right after interview? The one telling the haters to stop?” I nodded my head, indicating for him to go on. “I don’t think you should have done that.”
“Why not?” I asked.
“Because...you said, ‘sending her hate won’t make me break up with her.’ Doesn’t that imply that you were actually dating?”
“Well, the fans think we’re dating. I don’t want to confuse them at the moment and just tell them we aren’t. I need to do it properly.”
“Well, how are you going to do that?” Harry asked. I shrugged my shoulders and didn’t say anything. “Well, I think...you should call Simon. Maybe he can give you some advice.”
That’s not such a bad idea. I nodded my head and said, “Good idea, mate. I might later.”
With that, Harry nodded his head and left, nothing else being said. I should call Simon. Sure, he’s like, Mr. Boss Man, but he can give advice when we need it.
Before I could continue in my thoughts, there was a knock at the door. “Come in!” I yelled.
The door opened and I saw the one person I thought would never want to talk to me again. Her face was stained with tears and some were still flowing. She looked furious...confused...and sad. She was a wreck; her mascara running down her face and she was still wearing the clothes she wore earlier today. But, even looking like a wreck, she looked beautiful, even though she probably doesn’t want to hear that right now.
“Josie...” I said, starting to sit up.
She just stood there. She was shaking a bit and she was holding her phone in her hand. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before she spoke. “I don’t want to hear your arguments, Louis. You screwed up. BIG time. Everyone is coming to me and telling me that you messed up; that you didn’t mean what you said. I was thinking about coming and talking to you, until I saw what you tweeted.”
“Josie...Harry told me you might be confused by that, and...”
“And what, Louis? There’s not much you can say to make this any better.”
“I said what I did because I didn’t want to confuse the fans by telling them we weren’t really together. I thought I needed to do it properly...not over Twitter.”
“Then maybe you shouldn’t have Tweeted at all! Louis, the fans are going to be even more confused once you DO tell them what’s happening. And, do you even plan on doing that? You’re making everything WORSE. You’re not helping anyone! You’re leading your fans and the media on, and leaving your so called ‘best friend’ confused.”
“Josie, don’t you dare question if we’re friends or not. You’re my best friend. You know that.”
“Well, you sure aren’t acting like it! Louis, are you aware of how many fights we have been in this week? We’ve been fighting over Joshua, over the Liam Subway drama, and now this! SOMETHING happened over that year we were apart, because we sure didn’t fight like this in years past. Something’s happening to our friendship. And, it’s not something good! We keep fighting and if this is all it’s going to be...”
“Then what, Josie?” I asked worriedly.
She got calmer. “Maybe we need some space. Maybe we should rethink our entire friendship....” she trailed off.
“Joslynn Marie Davis. Don’t you DARE say that. We were doing PERFECTLY fine last week. You HAVE to remember that. Sure, this week just isn’t our week. We’re going through some rough stuff right now, but that shouldn’t threaten our friendship--” she cut me off.
“I know, I know...it really shouldn’t. But you have a lot of fixing to do before I can even think about forgiving you. But...we need space, Louis. I need to breathe. I need to think this over. Just...”
“Just what, Josie?” I asked, close to tears.
“I don’t think we should go to prom together. I don’t want to risk fighting there and we need time apart.”
What? She didn’t want to go to prom with me? All because of what I managed to screw up? Great, Louis. Just great.
Before any of the tears could spill, I nodded my head and said, “Whatever you want, Josie. Whatever you think is best.”
“Louis, please take a break with the whole ‘Josie’ thing. Just, please, call me Joslynn for right now. I need to...think...about our friendship....”
Now she doesn’t want me calling her what I can only call her? The one and only thing I want to call her? The one thing I get absolutely pissed off with if someone else uses it? Before I could say anything else, Josie left. Just like that. She walked out my door and shut it, leaving me in here to feel alone.
That’s when I broke. I messed everything up because my feelings were playing with me. I sat on the bed and do what I almost NEVER do. I cried. I cried in fear of losing the person that means the world to me. I can’t afford to lose her. She’s my other half. She helps me through everything. She, Harry, and my mom are the ONLY ones I would ever let see me cry. She’s the one I went with my problems to. But, now, I feel like I’ve lost her entirely.