Chapter 34
The sparkling snow shined beneath my feet. I wrapped my coat around me tighter. It was around noon and it had been one day since I've last seen Hansel. I still don't understand why I kissed him but I don't regret it because for once, I felt like things were perfect once again. I sighed and continued walking down the hill to my little cottage. My black boots stepped on the clear white snow. I looked down at my feet as I walked.
I was so stupid in believing that I can live without Hansel. I miss his warmth, the sense of protection he always gave me when we were together. I miss his cockiness and his stubbornness. I missed his arms around me as he whispered sweet nothings into my ear.
Maybe the way we did things wasn't right. But it is something I would gladly repeat if it meant I would still carry the baby inside my womb. My baby is one lucky person to have such a wonderful dad like Hansel, and I hoped with every nerve in my being that he would come out just like him.
The cold wind blew across my face and my hair covered my eyes. I put my hair behind my ears.
"I was beginning to worry I came to the wrong cottage," a male voice said. I snapped my eyes up and my heart skipped a beat as I saw him.
He was wearing a grey coat and black jeans. His hair was windswept and his sparkling green eyes stared at me with so many hidden emotions.
"Hansel," I breathed, "What are you doing here?"
Hansel was standing right next to my cottage and I finished taking the last few steps so I was in front of him.
"I thought about what you said, and I realized something. I realized that if the only way I could be with you is if I follow you to a cottage in the middle of nowhere, then so be it. As long as I'm with you, I will follow you 'til the end of the world and even further.
Maybe I went at things the wrong way. I should've taken you out on a couple of dates before I slid a ring on your finger. I should've given you the wedding you deserved but I was selfish. I was scared that I will wake up the next day and realize that my dream girl is nothing more than that, a dream. I saw the opportunity to tie you down and I ceased it, yes I thought you were sober but deep down inside I kept wishing you weren't so you couldn't change your mind and run before you realized what you were getting yourself into.
The day after I met you, and I saw your car speed down the driveway, I knew I had to search for you. And when I found out that same day that you worked for the SSS, heck I was so happy because maybe I wouldn't have to track you down. My original mission was to make sure the Romero case was running smoothly under the facade that I was helping train the SSS but when I saw you enter your father's office, my mission changed. I thought to myself: I gotta get this woman to fall in love with me. And I thought I was getting there until you told me how I was the first man you gave yourself to. Heck I was so happy to be your first and hopefully your last but then you told me you didn't remember a thing. I knew I messed up.
You spent most of your time with Romero and I knew I had to woo you one way or another, so I went undercover as well. Just to spend more time with you. But it only made things worse so then I tried to take you out for your birthday. It was going good until you got shot by my enemies. That's when I realized how if you stay with me, I will always be putting your life in danger. So I tried to stay away, I tried so damn hard, but I couldn't. I was too selfish.
I had to give it one last try but you kept pushing me away. I felt like every time I gained one step forward I was actually taking two steps back! It was fucking frustrating! I knew I had to resign but I couldn't! I just... couldn't.
And then I see you walking down the altar, and I thought: damn, she's beautiful. Then I started to imagine how nice it would've been if I would've actually went at things the right way, you could have been walking down the aisle to marry me in front of all of Prima Lucé so everyone could see that you are mine and only mine. Watching you walk down that aisle was like a dream come true, I felt like this was it. This is it, I'm finally going to be able to marry her the right way. Then my dream becomes a nightmare and Anthony blocks you from my view! You were marrying him! I wasn't about to let you marry someone else!
I had to stop that wedding, Cath. I wasn't about to lose you forever. Hell, even if you had married him, I would have snatched you away and taken you to a private island and live the rest of our lives there. All that mattered was that we had to be together. And then at the peak that night.
I had just professed my undying love to you, made love to you numerous times, and not even three hours later you shoot me! The hatred in your eyes as you pulled that trigger gave me a reality check. You hate me more than you could ever love me, so I did the one thing I never wanted to do. I gave up. My mother once told me that if you ever love someone truly, all you would want for them is their happiness. And your happiness was without me, it tore at my heart, it nearly killed me, but I loved you and I had to make you happy! I gave you the divorce and then I find out your dead!
How was I suppose to cope with that?! I demanded my guards to keep searching, there wasn't any way that you could be dead. And if you really were, I will soon be after but I had to make sure. It took us a whole damn month but Skylar finally found you. When they called me to let me know you were on your way to Kingdom I felt like I could breathe again! You were alive and the ache in my heart softened. Then I found out the motive for your faked death: you were expecting a child. My child. And then I knew I couldn't give up the battle. Not now. Not ever.
After our kiss yesterday, I realized that you still felt something for me. Maybe minimal, maybe only physical, but I swore to myself that I will make that love grow until you at least loved me 1/10th of what I feel for you. The news of my son gave me the reason to fight again but that kiss, Cath, it gave me hope. It gave me hope that maybe one day, fourty years from now, you could love me. And then I thought about the primary reason you faked your death, you wanted to protect our child. What kind of person will I be if I destroy your efforts and you're right. We can't bring our son into a world where both his parents have enemies swarming around, ready for revenge. We can't do that to him, Cath. So then I realized that I had no choice to make because deep inside my heart I knew what I've always wanted," Hansel said as he towered over me.
"And what do you want?" I asked. Tears were now running freely down my cheeks.
"You," Hansel said as he cupped my cheek. "My son," he said placing a hand over my stomach, "An eternity with the love of my life."
He bent down and kissed my forehead. I closed my eyes and placed my hands on his chest.
"You think a lot," I murmured, letting a tiny laugh escape.
Hansel wiped my tears away.
"I've messed up so many times Cath, but if you give me one last chance, I promise I won't need another. I will make up every single one of my mistakes to you by loving you unconditionally for the rest of my life," Hansel said. I opened my eyes and saw serenity in his eyes.
"I'm so sorry Hansel," I gasped, "I shouldn't have pushed you away so many times. I have always focused my life to my missions and when you came along, I freaked out because I suddenly had the urge to drop everything and leave with you but I couldn't. It just wasn't who I was. I finish what I start and you kept clouding my mind! You were always there, making me second guess myself. I let my urge for revenge get to me and I was too proud to ask you for help when the whole Jackson fiasco came up. I messed up too, Hansel, and I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry for pushing you away time and time again when all you ever wanted was to just be with me.
I'm sorry your stuck with a crazy monster. I'm sorry I wasn't brave enough to follow what my heart wanted. What it wants. After shutting off my humanity for so long, all it took was one look, one smile, and I felt it open again. I felt human again. Something I hadn't felt in decades! I always roamed around, wondering when my next kill is, but then you came along and it wasn't something I was prepared for. It wasn't something I had ever faced before. Enemies? I can handle that. People wanting me dead for x, y, and z reasons, not my problem. But then you came and I didn't know how to go about things.
I would catch myself being happy with you and I had to snap my mind back to reality. Because reality is Hansel that I'm a monster, I shut off my humanity and I can't love, I can't feel. But then You did the impossible: you made me feel, you showed me what it meant to love. I'm so sorry for all the trouble I caused you, Hansel, I don't even know why you bother with me anymore," I confessed, another tear escaping.
"Hey, don't cry," he said wiping my tear away, "It's not a bother because I love you and I will never stop fighting for us, Cath. Never. And don't you ever dare say again that your a monster because you are not. You became the world's best agent and it came with a price, and you dealt with it and it only makes me love more because I realize how strong you really are. And love isn't something you could prepare yourself for, it just happens. And when you find it-" he said.
"Never let it go," we said together and I smiled. Hansel grinned.
"Exactly, and I'm never letting you go, Cath because I love you. I've been in love with you since the first moment I laid my eyes on you on that bar and I will love you until the rest of eternity. I love you Cath and I need to know if you could one day find it in yourself to let me win your heart," Hansel's eyes smoldered.
"You can't win something that's already owned," I mumbled. Hansel froze and his face fell. His eyes flashed with pain.
"What?"
"My heart is and will always be yours. There's nothing to win over because my heart is already yours. I'm yours and only yours. I love you, Hansel, and nothing will ever change that," I said.
Hansel grinned.
"That's all I needed to hear," he said before he brought his lips to mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer. I wasn't about to let go anytime sooner. Hansel is mine and I am his, and nothing nor anyone could ever change that.
^~~~^~~~^~~~^~~~^~~~^~~~^~~~^~~~^~~~^~~~^
I sighed and leant my back against Hansel's chest. We were sitting on the floor, in front of the fireplace, and leaning against the sofa. The fire keeping us warm from the cold snow outside.
Hansel tangled his hand with mine and pulled it up to his lips. His other hand rested above my belly. I stare at the orange and red flames.
Hansel kissed my shoulder. I placed my hand above Hansel's which was on my belly.
"Do you really think it's a boy?" I asked.
"I am almost certain but I wouldn't mind if it were a girl. I will still love her the same way," Hansel answered.
We remained silent for a few moments.
"I love you, Cath," Hansel whispered into my ear. Goosebumps raised along my neck. I spun around in his arms, the blanket that was around us falling to my waist as I straddled him.
"I love you too," I breathed. Hansel grinned and pulled my lips to him.
"What now?" I asked him as I pulled away.
"Now, we start our lives together. You, me, our son, and with the several more to come," Hansel said.
"Several more to come?" I raised my eyebrow. He nodded.
"I will never get enough of you, Cath. And whether it's planned or an accident, we will have more kids. Hopefully another ten or twelve," Hansel smirked.
"Ten or twelve?" I laughed, "Well how many times do you plan on making love to me?"
"Every single night for the rest of our lives," Hansel pecked my lips. I shook my head at him.
"Your something else."
"But you still love me," he reminded me.
"I really do," I admitted. I rested my head on his chest.
"How long until you return to the castle?" I asked, afraid of his answer. Hansel hugged me tight.
"I'm not going back."
"What?" I sat up and stared at him, "What about the kingdom?"
"It can wait. It can all wait but what can't wait, is my life with you. I resigned Cath, to keep you and our son safe," he told me.
"What did your father say?"
He shrugged.
"He understood. He said that my position as King will always belong to me if I ever decide to come back," he kissed my forehead.
"Do you want to be King?"
"That's not important now."
"Hansel, answer my question."
Hansel sighed.
"It has been my dream ever since I was a child," he admitted.
"Well then let's go," I said.
"Go where?" he asked me.
"To the Kingdom so you could become King," I answered, "I'm not about to deprive you from your birth right."
Hansel stared at me.
"Are you sure? What about your and our child's safety?" he asked me.
I shrugged.
"You will keep us safe," I smiled. He grinned and pulled me back into his arms.
"You bet I will. But I think it can wait. I want to devote all of my time and attention to you and our family. When our kids are older, I'll consider going back," Hansel mumbled.
"Are you sure?"
"Positive."
We were in silence again.
"What about Klaus? He's still out there and you can't just abandon your Kingdom," I reminded him.
"And I can't abandon my family. I will keep you and our children safe. When the time comes, I will join the force against him and I will protect my family," Hansel paused, "Are you really done with the SSS and Baby Doll?"
"Yeah," I answered, "I have bigger responsibilities now."
"Would you ever go back?"
"Never," I frowned.
"Why not?"
"Because it's too much I will have to give up. And I'm too selfish to give it all up and go back and fend off the evils of the world," I admitted.
"Good. I don't think I would've let you go back," Hansel mumbled.
"Why not?"
"Because I would never risk losing you. I love you Cath, and if anything were to ever happen to you, I don't know what I would do. Cath, I love you with all of my heart and more, I cannot imagine living in a world where you aren't in it. Maybe we went at the things the wrong way, too many times. But I will make it up to you, I will love you until my last heartbeat and I will still love you in the afterlife.
You and our son are my world to me and I will do anything to protect you two. Even if it means that we will live in a cabin for the rest of our lives or that I give up my life protecting you two, whatever the cost is, I will gladly pay it. That is how much I love you, Cath. And if you permit me I will show you everyday exactly how much I love you," Hansel said, ending his speech.
My heart skipped a beat.
"I love you, Hansel. I cannot imagine a world without you either so let's just agree on one thing: let's never die," I mumbled. Hansel chuckled.
"Simple enough," Hansel said as me kissed me. I kissed him back.
The world could throw at us whatever it wanted but it will never change the way we feel about each other. Our enemies could try and kill us but we will fight together to remain alive.
Klaus will always remain a threat that we must prepare for, and when he comes, he will find his nephew and I together. And if the necessity ever came, I will join the battle against Klaus because I will be damned if I let something as stupid as a crazed man obsessed over world domination tear me apart from my true love. Hansel is my everything and together, we will protect what we love, even if it means that we must kill off his uncle.
Klaus seems like a dangerous man, but with the SSS, the Royal Army, and now the GUARDIANS on Earth, he will be stopped. Even if it is the last thing I do.