Chapter 39 - Already Gone
My mom was all smiles the moment she got in my room. After 3 weeks of staying in the hospital I was finally getting discharged. My burned legs were not hurting that much but it was still effing painful and my face has slightly went back to it's old look. Although I have this huge ugly scar, that they will remove when it's fully healed.
"Alright, Lin. You're good to go," my doctor said after giving me some instructions.
I said my thank you to him and soon I was alone with my mom.
"Are you excited?" she exclaimed.
I wasn't in the mood to fake my emotions. I was angry and sad at the same time. Even though hospitals creep me out, I didn't want to leave. Because leaving would mean going back to London. And to go back meant no Jake.
"You don't even have to ask me that question," I grumbled.
My mom stopped moving for awhile before she faced me with huge ear splitting smile.
"We're going to have so much fun! The shopping together, our night outs and barbecue!"
I rolled my eyes at how hypocrite my mother was. Since I wasn't really in the mood for fighting or being extremely rude, I decided to hold my tongue and just ignore her.
"We had your room redone, sweetie. It's really classy!"
As my mom was busy blabbering, I tried to get out of the bed. It wasn't really conventional to do so, since I couldn't really use my legs well yet.
With all my efforts, my feet touched the cold hard floor. My hands were placed on the side of the bed as I slightly slipped my body off the bed. Tears were starting to prick my eyes as I felt extreme pain on legs and my ribs screaming to stop. But I didn't listen to my pleading body.
I was getting frustrated with all the lying down and not doing anything. I wasn't paralyzed, I was only injured.
As I got myself to fully (not really) stand up, I released a sigh and tried to walk. The term was 'tried'. One step was all it took to send me lying on the floor.
I groaned in pain as I laid on my back, already afraid to move.
"Lin!"
My mother rushed towards my aid and helped me back on my bed. She was furious, it was very much evident on her facial expression.
"You cannot do things by yourself yet, honey."
Even though she tried to say it with compassion, anger laced her words.
I ignored her words and tried to get out of her firm grip on my arms.
"Your legs are burned! Your ribs haven't fully recovered yet! What are you thinking?" she snapped.
The tears that were brimming my eyes fell. I had gone a 2 weeks without crying but right now, I just seemed to forget my promise to myself.
My mom stopped talking. She stood shocked in front of me as if she doesn't know what to do.
"Get out!" I screamed.
"Angel-"
"Out!" My voice came out too powerful even with tears free flowing from my eyes.
Her grip on my arms loosened and soon I was left standing with the bed as my support.
My mother scurried out of my room. As soon as the door shut, I let unwanted tears flow like a waterfall. I couldn't hold my place anymore, so I just let my body slip and hit the cold floor with my back against the side of the bed.
Just when I thought everything was going to be okay everything was taken away for me. My life, career, education, baby and Jake.
I was able to recover from my kidnapping incident when I was 10. My Nana was killed in front of me just for the heck of it. I never wanted to be in that situation again, but just a few weeks ago, I was in that position again.
"I need you to clam down, Angel."
His soft words echoed in my mind, making me cry harder. Why am I even thinking about him?
Just when I thought I was just imagining stuffs, a warm hand was placed on my arm.
"Angel, please."
It was like somebody had placed a plug on my eyes. My head turned abruptly too get a sight on who was talking.
"Jake?"
-*-*-*-
It was hard to breathe. Not literally but with the air being so polluted by awkwardness was making me feel like it was hard to breathe.
I played with my fingers as I watched Jake from the corner of my eyes.
He was seated on the white chair just a fee meters away from my bed. His elbows were placed on his knees as he played with something in his hands. I couldn't see what he was holding though.
My heart pumped like it was being rammed by a boxer against my chest as I pictured Jake's arms wrapped around me.
When he walked in the room and saw me crying he tried to calm me down. Even with the known issue between us he wrapped his arms around me like he was protecting me. He let me cry on his black shirt not even caring if it was starting to soak.
Jake snapped me out of my mental review of what happened earlier by a sigh.
I looked at him with curious eyes.
"Do you hate me?" He silently asked.
It was as if he was afraid of what I was going to say.
The words seemed to pass my tongue without even me uttering a word.
I was perfectly aware that nothing came out, so instead I shook my head.
It was pretty obvious that it was all it took to make the fear in Jake's eyes be replaced with relief. Though there was still a tinge of pain.
What was I even thinking? I'm a what now? A freaking emotion reader?
A small smiled was painted on Jake's face. If I wasn't mistaken there were tears brimming his eyes.
He slowly stood up from his chair with his right hand fisted. He walked towards me.
"That's all I need," he whispered.
What shocked me was what he did next. He leaned down against me with his eyes closed.
I anticipated his lips on my lips but it never came. What I got was his lips on my forehead. But that doesn't mean it didn't give me those dinosaurs in my stomach as they riot in there.
He leant his forehead against mine with his hands on either of my cheeks.
Kiss me, Jake! Kiss me, Jake! I chanted in my head.
But the kiss never came.
"There are a lot of things I want to say and do to you, but I can't. I want to make this easy, Angel. I hope someday, you'll be able to forgive me, my love."
He planted one last longing kiss on my forehead and then stood up. His right hand made it's way to mine and he slipped a cold metal in my hand. As he fully stood on his level he didn't spare me one last look nor a glance. Instead he quickly turned around and made me lose sight of him immediately.
To say watching him walking away from me was painful was an understatement. The feeling of pure torture was not enough to describe the way my heart was being gorge out right now.
I clutched my hand tighter and immediately felt a sharp pain. I opened my right hand and saw a white gold band. Judging the size of the ring, I knew it was mine. Meaning it was Jake's.
The door of the room flew open and in came my mother with her fury blazing.
"Why was that man in here?" She practically screamed at me.
Out of instinct I clutched my hand to hide the ring.
My mom's eyes felt like it had turned red as she walked towards me.
"That boy will do you no good. Angeline, do not be blinded by his features! He brought into this hospital. Wounded and broken. I will no longer risk it. From now on, you will never see him. Got it?"
It felt like I was being treated like a teenager. Well, I was but I was in my legal age and was turning to 20 next month.
"You do know, you can't tell me what to do right?" I snapped.
My mom huffed. "Yes. I can. And we are going to catch a flight."
-*-*-*-
I felt helpless and pathetic. I was letting my mother boss me around like I have no right to have a say in MY life.
The leather business class seats made me realize that my parents really did put a lot of effort to get me back to London. Meaning, they really wanted me back.
As soon as the plane took off and we were already flying thousands of feet above air, I felt like I wanted to cry and break down.
This was really it. At that split second I had decided that I was going to let them. My life was alright before a certain Jake Grey came waltzing in my life.
Why was I even thinking about this? I knew deep inside that it wasn't true.
That certain Jake Grey changed me and my life. And I tell you this, it was a wonderful life.
And to say that I am happy that I have met a Jake Grey, was an understatement.
-*-*-*-
My room wasn't the way I remembered it. It wasn't girly anymore. It was more woman like.
The walls were painted beige with some white effects. My bed was changed into a king size that was facing the huge window. There was now a new desk with a new Mac computer. It wasn't my old room.
My father helped me down on my bed as I looked around.
The room was beautiful, but something was off. It was empty.
"What happened to my closet?" I asked.
My mom cracked a smile.
"Since you are now a grown woman. Your dad and I decided to give you a bigger space for your clothes."
My mom waltz towards a door in my room that I didn't realize was there. She opened the door like it was magical lair.
It was what I had dreamt off. White walls with a luxury black couch in the middle. The walls were filled with cabinets and shoe racks. It was like a princess owned the closet.
"Do you like it? We'll add more shoes and clothes!" She squealed like a cheerleader.
I should be screaming in joy or running and leaping like a little girl (even though I physically couldn't), but I felt so empty.
The only thing that I was certainly feeling was sadness and emptiness.
I should be mad at Jake. But he only did what he think was best for me.
Then again, he didn't really considered my opinion and say.
"Thank you," I managed to say.
The happiness on my mother's face fell into disappointment.
I knew that this was not the reaction she was expecting. But then she should know what I exactly feel.
"How 'bout you get some sleep, kiddo?" My dad asked in a cheery tone, in hopes to kill the sadness in the air.
I nodded my head even though I knew that it would take some time to get me to sleep. As of now, I wanted to be alone. So I guess faking sleep would be the answer.
My dad walked towards me and planted a soft chase kiss on my head.
"I love you, sweetie," he whispered.
Soon enough, he left. But my mother remained in her position.
"Why are you being like this?" She snapped.
The compassion that she seemed to use too much these days was now gone.
She walked towards me with her hands on her waist.
"Don't lie to me, Angeline! I know everything!"
I was suddenly furious. I wasn't not in the mood to be yelled at.
"You don't know anything," I hissed between my gritted teeth.
My mom threw her head back in laughter, but it was a fake and humorless one.
"Oh, please. I know that your marriage with that boy is fake! It's all about the visa! So stop acting like you actually love that boy."
I was taken aback. I didn't exactly knew that my mother was aware.
"H-how?" I stuttered.
I cursed myself mentally for acting so shocked and guilty.
"That manager of his!"
"You don't know everything mom! I love him!"
She shook her head. "That boy doesn't have feelings for you."
"Because I only bring you pain. I make your life complicated when it's suppose to be amazing."
His words echoed in my head continuously.
"He loves me."
I was surprised at how much conviction that statement held.
"He was just finding a way out, Lin!" She snapped.
Her words were painful. The thoughts and doubts in my head were now said into words. I didn't came from me though. It came from her.
He was just finding a way out.
-*-*-*-
The whole argument with my mother escalated quickly. I never knew that I would have the guts to yell at her or even talk back at her, but I just did. After completely breaking down and being hysterical, my mom gave up and left the room so I could calm down.
Even with my ribs healed a bit, it was still painful and was still making me feel like my lungs were restricted.
Tears were just flowing out of my eyes making me feel so little.
Why was I even shedding a tear?
Maybe because I was kidnapped and tortures. My because I was feeling so little. Maybe because I lost my child. Maybe because I lost the man that I have ever loved.
From my bed I tried to push myself up and walk towards my luggage. I was dizzy from all the crying and the jet lag didn't really help one bit. Still taking all the courage energy left, I pushed myself to the limit to get towards my bag.
When I was near, I was aware that my legs were starting to give out. Before I could even make my face fall flat on the floor, I slowly sat on the floor and opened my bag.
I started searching in my bag, making me surrounded by clothes. After a few minutes, I got what I was looking for.
I held the soft gray fabric in my hand and enclosed it in my arms. I inhaled the sweet scent that reminded me of a certain someone.
The tears that were all dried up in my eyes started to run down my cheeks again.
I was missing him. A lot.
As I hugged his sweatshirt I felt something inside. I placed the sweatshirt on my lap and got the thing that was inside.
It was a white paper. The paper was neatly folded and on the paper was my name written legibly.
I was afraid to open it, since I was sure as to who wrote it. But my curious and helpless romantic side made me open the paper.
"I promise to take you, Angeline Wilson to be my lawfully wedded wife. I promise to keep you safe physically and mentally. I promise to be there for you whenever you smile or cry. And when you cry, I promise to try my very best to make it all better. I promise to make you remember the love we share each single day until you're old and wrinkly. I can't promise you that we wont fight, but I promise to make it right before we fall asleep in the night. I promise to hold you tight at night and kiss you in the morning. And when the time comes that you will fall out of love with me, I will make you fall back in love, but if you don't, I will show you how much I love you by letting you go."
I was serious about this vow. The moment I said those words, I knew I was serious about you. I was ready to change the way you think about me.
But in all honestly, I was not able to keep any of those promises.
But there's one last thing that I could do.
"I will show you how much I love you by letting you go."
I hope I was able to show you.
Xx
~ Jake Grey
-*-*-*-
LATE UPDATE! Sorry! School work is shit.
Lol. So gotta warn you guys...the story is ending soon!
And for some reason, I'm still up to make another sequel.
So I saw some comments about you guys wondering what I mean by creating a story about Alec Austin.
Well, here's a little teaser.
Alec Austin is now fully grown up. He's now 18!! Well, in the story anyway! ((Zach will be there))
So stay tuned!
Ya'll know what to do!
Vote? Comment? Promote? Follow?
Thank you!
Always smile :)
Xx