Honey, I Shrunk the Egos

By EmbodiedInsanity

64.1K 2.7K 6.8K

The "egos" are just some fun characters created by Markiplier and Jacksepticeye. Unless they happen to be two... More

The Solution to an Ego Problem
No Short Jokes!
Okay Google, Fight!
Bro Tiny!
Come on DOWN to Baby Bulk Buy!
Trust Ze Doctah
I'm Sorry... You're Shrinking
Magic!
The Host then joined the story.
The Silent Knight
Who Wants to be Five Inches Tall?
Here to Help!
Not the Static!
Two for the Price of One
And Back To You...
No Liquids Over 3oz, or Tiny People
Freedom or Food?
Better Together
Ten, Nine, Eight ...
World's Worst Easter Egg Hunt
On The Road Again
Return to the Lab
Been Here Before
Still Small
Back to Work
Sabotage!
Less Than Peaceful Day Off
Lasers Version 2.0
Don't Panic
Missing It Already
Back Home at Last
Settling in Again
Revisiting the Ego Problem

Silver Lining

1.6K 78 178
By EmbodiedInsanity

Kathryn was sitting in the driver's seat, still in the parking lot. "Where are we going?" She asked again.

"Just... give us a minute." Amy said from the back, where she was seated with Mark in her hand. Mark was sitting cross-legged in her palm, his face in his hands, shaking his head.

"I don't know." Mark muttered. "I just don't know. He could be literally anywhere!"

"His emergency contact is Ibis." Dr. Iplier piped up, from inside the box, Tyler was holding on his lap.

"Ibis! Of course!" Mark gasped. "His number is in my phone, do you have it?"

Amy nodded a little, pulling his cell phone out of one of her pockets and held it down so he could operate it. Using his whole hand he swiped across the screen and smashed his palms against the touch screen buttons to put in his password. He grunted as it declined, and tried again, finally getting right. Tyler leaned into the back seat, tilting his head. "Ibis?"

"Yeah, yeah..." Mark mumbled, opening his contacts. "He's uh... he's the Silver Shepherd's uhm..." Mark held his hands up, making air quotes. "Sidekick."

Tyler glanced at Amy, then back down at Mark. "Why did you say sidekick like that?"

"When the Silver Shepherd appeared in this reality, his sidekick, Ibis, did not appear with him." Google Blue began.

Google Red continued for him. "In order to continue trying to fight crime, the Silver Shepherd recruited a child, who wears a bath towel as a cape, and calls him Ibis."

"How old is this kid?" Tyler rose an eyebrow.

"Found it!" Mark grinned. "Uh, he's like... 14. He's a cool kid." He waved his hand, then pointed to the phone, glancing up at Amy. "Okay, call this number. Ask if he knows where the Silver Shepherd is."

Nodding, Amy called, putting the phone on speaker phone and held it up. "Hello?" Came a quiet voice, followed by a soft sniffle.

"Ibis?" Amy asked softly.

"I guess I go by Jeremy now." The voice muttered.

Amy frowned, glancing down at Mark, who shrugged. "Ask!"

"Okay." Amy sighed. "Uh, Jeremy, do you know where the Silver Shepherd is?"

"Oh..." Suddenly there was a violent sob, and Mark narrowed his eyes, motioning for Amy to keep going.

"Jeremy? Are you alright?" Amy asked softly.

"He... the Silver Shepherd is dead, ma'am." The boy replied.

Mark's eyes widened and he stared up at the phone, shaking his head slightly. He half collapsed as he sat down, hanging his head and shook it quickly. "No... no! How does he... how is he sure?"

Amy swallowed hard. "I'm sorry Jeremy. What... happened?" Jeremy struggled to explain the situation through his crying, and then gave them the address of their secret lair, which was actually just a shed in the Silver Shepherd's back yard. Amy promised him they would be there soon, and hung up. She could feel the odd tremor as Mark shook in her hand and she frowned. "Mark..."

"This is all my fault." Mark looked up at her, tears flowing down his cheeks. "He was a goofball and he never really saved anyone's life... but he never caused any harm either and now he's gone. It was my fault he was here, and now it's my fault he's gone and now that poor kid..." Mark sniffled, shaking his head. "That poor kid is probably traumatized."

"You had no idea this would happen. No one did." Amy promised, holding him protectively close and tried to soothe him.

Google Blue calculated the route and began giving Kathryn directions as she drove. The drive to the Silver Shepherd's house was somber, everyone silent except for Mark who became a little hysterical, and Amy who continued to try and console him.

The Silver Shepherd had been plotting sites of recent bike thefts on a map plastered to the wall when the shrinking had begun. He had started to notice something felt off, but didn't really realize what was happening until his suit had bagged around him and he was too short to reach the top of the map that he could have, just seconds before. "Ibis!" He had called, and the sidekick had come from typing up notes of their last heroic adventure.

"Silver Shepherd what's-" The boy had stopped, just staring as he had adjust his blue towel cape. "Are you shrinking?"

"It would seem so, Ibis." The Shepherd had nodded. "I must have been struck by a shrink ray of some sort." He had placed his hands on his hips. "It's... the only explanation."

Ibis had nodded. "What... what do we do?"

"Well first we..." Shepherd had stood for a moment with his mouth open then had slowly closed it, sighing. "I think we wait for a bit. I have to stop shrinking eventually!" He had grinned. He had eventually began to get worried as the shrinking continued, but by the time he had realized it could be a problem, the pace had increased dramatically and the room was shooting up around him. As he had shrunk smaller and smaller, he had began to panic, running around the shed and tripping over his costume. Ibis had chased after him, trying to hold the costume up for him so he wouldn't trip. Eventually the Silver Shepherd had shrunk out of sight and Ibis lost his footing. He stumbled forward, tripping over the costume, and crushed something beneath his foot, hearing a loud cracking sound as his eyes had widened.

"Shepherd? Shepherd!" The sidekick had dropped to his knees beside the costume and dug through until he found the tiny man, laying on his side. He had gently scooped him up in his mask and laid him on the desk, then waited for him to wake up... but he never had.

As they arrived at the house, Amy climbed out, tucking the sobbing Mark close against herself, and Tyler followed with his box of confused and sad, tiny people. Kathryn slowly got out and followed after them, as they all walked around the house and into the back yard, approaching the moderately sized shed. Amy knocked softly and the teary eyed sidekick opened it for them. "Come on in." He nodded.

"Did you... call anyone?" Tyler asked softly.

The boy's eyes widened. "I should have! I should have called 911!"

"No." Mark sighed as Amy held her hand out so he could walk onto the desk. "They wouldn't have believed you, and if they had, they couldn't have helped him. He has no proof of identity, no insurance and he's five inches tall. You didn't do anything wrong." He slowly walked over, looking down at the tiny form, mostly covered in the seemingly giant mask and frowned. "It's weird seeing him out of costume. You know... I didn't even know his secret identity name."

Ibis walked over, sniffling. "It was-"

"No!" Google Blue shouted from the box. "He did not want Mark to know."

"What? Why not?" Mark muttered.

Google sighed. "If we try to explain the Silver Shepherd, we will be here all day."

Tyler sighed, setting the box down on the desk and helped the egos out, watching as they all wandered over to stand around the body, seeming to pay respects. Mark shook his head, wiping tears from his face. "I... I can't believe there's a death on my shoulders."

"I stepped on him!" Ibis shrieked, before falling into sobs. Frowning, Mark glanced up at Amy, waving his arm.

Amy frowned, hugging the boy. "Hey, it's alright. It was an accident. Anything could have happened... they're all so tiny and fragile right now. We've almost gotten Mark killed a few times..."

Ed shook his head. "We'll all be dead soon."

"No." Mark grunted. "I'm keeping everyone else safe."

"Why are you all sad?" Google Blue finally asked.

Mark groaned. "Googlplier... you are not Wilford. You understand death. I'm not explaining this to-"

"Who is dead?" Google Red asked.

They all turned to look at the Googles and Mark rubbed his face on his sleeve, then pointed to the body behind him. "The Silver Shepherd."

Google Green shook his head sightly. "His breath rates are normal."

"And body temperature is within a normal range." Google Yellow added.

"Breath..." Mark turned, crouching down and stared at the man covered in the mask. "He IS breathing!" He screamed, crawling closer. Ibis rushed to the side of the desk, Amy behind him. Mark knelt down, looking the man over, then caught sight of the Shepherd's eye opening and closing quickly. "Are... are you faking?" He growled, before shaking the man. "Are you faking?!" He screamed.

The Silver Shepherd suddenly burst to life, pushing him back. "Hey! Whoa! Easy!"

"What the fuck?!" Mark screamed, sitting back. "I thought you were dead, you fucking asshole!"

"I thought you were dead too!" Ibis whimpered as he wiped his tears.

The Silver Shepherd sat up, tugging his mask around his waist. "Yes, well... I wanted to see what nice things people would say about me. But no one really said any nice things." He muttered.

"This is why we don't say nice things about ya." Ed Edgar pointed out.

"He uh... has a point there." Bim added, pointing towards Ed. "Also is anyone else weirded out about how handsome Shepherd is out of costume? Just me? Alright." He nodded.

Mark stood up, walking with purpose to the edge of the desk, nearly falling before Amy realized what he was doing and caught him just in time. "You need to communicate Mark." She muttered.

"You got me." He mumbled, sitting down in her hand.

Amy sighed, holding him close. "Barely." She added. "He's fine. We didn't lose anyone. No reason to start now."

"That was a really nasty trick." Dr. Iplier scolded.

The Silver Shepherd sighed. "I guess so. Sorry guys. Doctor, shouldn't you have checked whether or not I was dead?"

"Uh well..." Dr. Iplier chuckled. "Next time!"

"No next time!" Mark screamed. "Let's go!"

"I know that was jarring, but you need to calm down." Amy told him softly, before tucking him into her shirt pocket. "Take a breather." She whispered to him, then pulled an outfit out of her purse and tossed it on the desk. "You don't get to pick what you wear. Get dressed. Let's go."

"Did I even step on you?" Ibis frowned.

"Nah..." The Silver Shepherd shook his head as he pulled on the doll clothing. "I think you stepped on my costume zipper and cracked it against the floor." He shrugged. "I'm fine."

"You're a jerk." Ibis muttered.

The Silver Shepherd chuckled. "Oh Ibis. I'll see you when we get this sorted and I'm regular sized again?" He grinned.

"I guess." Ibis sighed out, before leaving and headed home.

"You really are a jerk." Tyler agreed as he shuffled the egos back in the box, before dumping the Silver Shepherd in with them.

Amy shifted. "You need to apologize to Mark by the way."

"For what?" The Silver Shepherd gasped.

Mark threw his arms over the edge of Amy's pocket and pulled himself up. "I thought you were dead! I thought that kid was traumatized for life! And I blamed myself! And it was you! It was fucking you all along!"

Ed grunted. "Well I mean, this all started because you were trying to get rid of us. That's as good as dying."

Mark sighed. "I know... and I regret that now. I'm sorry." He nodded. "I've realized how much I value you all now. You've all become... your own people. And we've... still got more out there." He sighed, glancing up at Amy. "We need to start checking parks for King of the Squirrels. He's vulnerable."

Amy nodded, glancing at Kathryn. "Just... random parks?" She muttered.

"The largest ones first." Mark shrugged. "I don't... have any other way to find him." He sighed deeply, shaking his head.

Tyler carried the box back out to the car and sat in the front seat, Amy climbing into the back as she tried to further calm Mark, while Kathryn got in, to drive. "The Silver Shepherd joined the box, and Dirty Jim checked to make sure he was alive, not understanding that it was already proven that he in fact was."

"What the fuck is that!" The Silver Shepherd screamed.

"Dirty Jim." Google Yellow answered.

Ed Edgar chuckled. "It's a cockroach, and right now that fucking bug is a better person than you are!"

"And that comes from the man who sells babies for a living." Bim smiled.

"Why is there always shots at ma business? I make a good living!" Ed grunted. "Make a lot of people happy!"

Silver Shepherd groaned, looking around. "Perhaps I did take it too far. I'm sorry guys. I shouldn't have pretended to be dead."

Mark sighed heavily and Amy smiled. "Did you hear that?" Mark only nodded, laying against her fingers and glanced up at her, forcing a small smile. "We're going to save them all." She promised, hoping she would be able to make good on that.

"Good thing you're better at keeping promises than I am." Mark chuckled softly, shaking his head.

Amy gently kissed the top of his head. "Everything will be alright." Mark nodded, glancing out the car window at the clouds zipping past in the sky above, hoping King would be at the first park they stopped in.

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