Dedicated to:
Rainkeeper: HAPPY SAINT PATRICKS DAY!!
Air: Our scavenger friend apologizes for not updating sooner- she says it's hard to type with second degree burns on your fingers.
Joy: Yes, that is difficult...
Nightflyer: How would you k-
Joy: ANYWAYS! Let's get started!
*players appear*
Deathbringer: Didn't you guys say today was some holiday?
Seashell: Yep! It's St. Paddys Day!
Clay: What traditions are there?
Nightflyer: Well, it's an Irish holiday, so a lot of people dress in green. Irish people tipically eat Cornbeef and cabbage, and maybe some Irish soda bread-
Rainkeeper: IT IS ALSO THE HOLIDAY WHERE YOU GET SMASHED.
Sunny: What?
Joy: Where you drink a ton and do crazy stuff.
Tsunami: Why would you do that?
Air: *shrugs* Irish Stereotypes.
Seashell: So! In the spirit of the holiday is our dare. Star flight has to get drunk and then tell us the story of the Lost Princess!
Joy: Bonus points if you make Tsunami cry.
Starflight: Why do I have to be drunk for this? I can just-
Rainkeeper: BECAUSE COMEDIC VALUE- now drink up! *throws Starflight a bottle*
Starflight: *doesnt catch it*
Bottle: *smashes on the ground*
Air: Nice.
Rainkeeper: .....Lets try this again.
*several broken bottle of liquor later*
Joy: OH FOR MOONS SAKE *pours bottle of scotch down Starflight's throat*
*a while later*
Starflight: *is drunk*
Air: ITS STORYTIME EVERYONE!!!
Seashell: Starflight, why dont you tell us about the Lost Princess?
Starflight: Okaaabe!
All: *circled up on the floor around Starflight*
Starflight: SOOOOOOooo Once apun a Tim, ther wuz this princess- *hiccups* Course we know NOW dat it wuz Sue-numi.
Tsunami: Really?
Starflight: An' this princesss wannded tu run away. Probly cuz Tsunami's family sucks an we all knows it.
Starflight: But den this princess runs off an gets loss, an the WHOLE KINGYDOM is off lookin for her- AND DATS COMPLETELY BULLHIT. Peoples got Jobs. They'd not gonna DROP EVERYTHING and go searchin for sum princess that wuz probly a jerk to em anyways jus cuz she's ROYALTY. But dis is mazical feyre lan, so they do whatever.
Sunny: I'm liking this better than the original.
Peril: We should get Starflight drunk more often- he's more fun like this.
Starflight: So, some magic shit happens or whatever and- okay this WHOLE KINGYDOM is totally on cocaine or sumthin cuz it's freakin MAGIC JELZYFISH dat guide the princess home an then she's happy cause happly ever after bullcrap has to happen. An her sucky ass family, who are all high af, are jus so happy to see her....
Starflight: *sniffles* No one in my family would be that happy to sees me...
Joy: Oh great, he's gone to the self hating drunk stage.
Starflight: MY FAMLY HATES ME.
Riptide: ALL OUR FAMILIES HATE US STARFLIGHT GET OVER IT.
Sunny:.... My family loves me....
Peril: Then screw off.
Sunny: Okaaaay.
Clay: Go back to the story! I wanna know how it ends!
Glory:....Clay, you've read this before.
Clay: But not this version!
Starflight: Oh! So yea.... The skywing high Royal family is all happys an they has a feast wid cows cuz underwater cows exist when your snorting jellyfish- an then Clay dives in an eats all their food, an the princess is thrown out of da palisa a few years lyre cuz she fell in luv wid a Tide pod.
Riptide:..... So I'm a tide pod?
Night flyer: It's a tide ad
Tsunami: YOU RUINED MY FAVORITE STORY!!!
Riptide: Tsunami, calm down.
Tsunami: *angrily starts crying* I CANT- YOU JUST RUINED MY CHILDHOOD!
Air: Welcome to Tumblr.
Starflight: That's I did *sips a beer*
Starflight: 'Appy Sane Party's day everybody.