Restart
Tyler has been unemployed for his whole life, and when he is drunk he meets a mysterious man who promises him a job in return of being a subject in an experiment. He becomes ten years younger and goes back to high school – where he meets Ethan. But, as the experiment stops, all memory of him will be wiped.
Warnings: Not actually underage! Ethan is 28, Tyler is 29, but Tyler thinks Ethan is 18 so he kind of thinks he is a creep. Tyler drinks a lot. They are in school, which is pretty scary. Tyler also smokes, basically everything your parents warn you about but every 14 year old kid is doing these days. lotsa angst
last note: im trying something else with my writing style. if you think its different than normally, yes it might be. its not permanent, or maybe it will, but please leave your thoughts.
Even his reflection was disappointed in him.
Tyler kept his eyes on his fingers as he tied his tie, purposely avoiding his own piercing gaze. Almost thirty years old and he never had a job. He solely survived on his parents money.
Nearly every day he searched (and found) for a job. Today was such a day. He ran his hand through his hair once more, took a deep breath and flattened his suit. He was always afraid of these kind of interviews.
He opened the door and was on his way.
~
"So why do you think you are suited for this job?"
"I have a wide range of abilities, the strongest being good on the social aspect."
~
Tyler put his head in his hands, groaning. He was sitting in a bar, chugging one drink after another. He had seen the interviewers face. He knew that, once again, he didn't get the job. After a while he just started reading their expressions.
They had a twitch by the corner of the mouth and they didn't look him in the eyes? They thought he was pathetic.
They looked at him without tilting their head back, their lips tightening? They were angry with him.
He signed the bartender that he wanted another shot. The boy (he didn't even look old enough to drink, what the fuck?) walked over him and put a hand on his shoulder.
"You look like you had enough for tonight, man."
Tyler groaned something in response and tried to lift his head to face the bartender, but it hurt and he was too drunk to see the boy's features. He got up, his head immediately spinning, and tried to stumble out of it.
If he was less drunk, he might have noticed that the bartender let him go without getting paid.
But he was that drunk.
~
Start of the experiment
The cold air definitely helped him clear out the intoxication. He definitely wasn't sober, but he could see clear and walk straight.
"Tyler Scheid."
The voice was clear and deep and made Tyler pause in his steps. He turned around, expecting to find an old friend of classmate, but instead was met with an unfamiliar man. He was fairly short, with black hair and glasses.
"Tyler Scheid: Spend seven years in university, advancing through graduate school afterwards, but has never had a job. Correct?"
Tyler groaned a response. He came here to forget, not to be reminded by strangers.
"Oh, how rude. I never introduced myself." He handed Tyler a business card. "My name is Fischbach. Mark Fischbach. I work for Restart Lab. Perhaps you have heard of it?"
Tyler shook his head, his intoxicated head still trying to process all of this. Why does he know all my information? Why have I never heard of Restart lab.?
"I'll get straight to the point. You have been selected as subject 002. of the Restart project. We are seeking your cooperation. You are currently unemployed, and we are able to help you get a job."
Tyler supposed the alcohol helped him stay calm, but his ears caught the word "job" and he was interested.
"The experiment is a one-year experience. We cover all the costs – food, clothes, anything you might need. And in addition we will introduce you to a company who will guarantee you a job – if you want, even for life. What do you say?"
Tyler tried to think rationally, but the alcohol in his system made him agree.
"So what do I have to do?"
~
Tyler woke up with a painful headache and an urge to vomit. He shot out of bed, running towards the toilet. He already regretted whatever decisions he made that night.
He looked in the mirror. His eyes had giant bags under his eyes and his hair still had gel in it.
Gross.
But something was off.
His skin had acne on it, and his stubble was slighter and barely there. His face looked...younger. It was as if he went back in time.
The man – Mark – held out his hand. In the palm of his hand laid two pills: one blue and one red. They looked like medicine.
"We want you to relive your last high school year. You will go back in time ten years – age 19 – but you can pass for 18 if you want. You will interact with other kids, and try to find the mistake you made. If you succeed – you will have a well-payed job. If you fail – you'll be stuck there until we decide you have succeeded."
Without a lot of hesitation Tyler grabbed the pills.
"The blue one will make you look younger, the red one will make you look older. You will need the blue one to start the experiment. After the experiment, all memories of those who are not connected to the Lab will be removed."
Without hesitation Tyler swallowed the blue pill.
Tyler groaned and pulled on his curls. How could he be so stupid?
The doorbell rang. Great, just what he needed. A visitor.
He opened the door and revealed Mark Fischbach, still smiling and looking like nothing was wrong.
"I see the effects have taken place. How do you like your old body?"
It took all of Tyler's willpower not to smack the door back in Mark's smiling face. But he didn't. The damage had been done, so why try and change it? Who knows, maybe something good could come out of it. Like a job.
He ran his hand through his hair with a sigh, and opened the door further to let Mark in. Mark happily accepted the invitation and started rummaging through his bag. He pulled out some pieces of paper, a paper bag and some books.
"Alright, so this is what's going to happen. As you might know, school starts soon, yes? So you'll be joining as a transfer student. Of course, we don't expect you to fit right in. For the sake of keeping your identity a secret, we have told the authority of the school you came from a school far away, where manners are different. Just please don't fail your tests, alright?"
Mark handed him the paper bag. Tyler opened it, just to see a fake ID card and some official looking papers.
"We took care of all of this. You just take care of being a high schooler."
With that Mark dumped the pile of books on Tyler's lap and walked out, neatly closing the door behind him and Tyler was left pinching the bridge of his nose, wondering what he had gotten himself into.
~
A week later, Tyler stood in front of the mirror again. This time there was no suit, no styled hair. He was wearing a white button up blouse and some black pants. On the piece of paper that Mark had given him was written that this was the dress code.
For some reason he was way more nervous than for any job interview he ever had. Why was he so nervous? He had been there before. He had made it through before. He could do this – it wasn't like it would be so different then ten years before, would it?
~
"We will keep an eye on you, but we won't interfere much."
Mark's words were stuck in his head. He couldn't help but try and see who the so-called Support Division was. Mark said there were two people, one of which being Mark himself. But this one was supposed to be undercover, so Tyler doubted he would get to know them.
~
One month into the experiment – start of the interaction
Tyler walked into the classroom, students sitting here and there. Tyler sat down into a random seat next to the window.
"Uhm...That is my seat."
Tyler turned towards the voice, only to see a small boy with bright blue hair staring right back at him.
"What?"
"My seat," the boy repeated, slow and with a raised eyebrow like he couldn't believe Tyler was stupid enough to not understand him. He pointed at the board – oh my god, they still had chalkboards?
"They already have decided where we're going to be seated. You're sitting in my seat."
And indeed, on the board was a map of the classroom with a name written on each desk. Ethan Nestor, was the boy's name. Tyler's seat was next to it.
His face flushed. Great, he hadn't even been here for ten minutes and he already managed to fuck it up. The boy looked at him expectantly and Tyler got up, sliding into the next seat.
He hoped he didn't piss the boy off, since they were going to be stuck together for the rest of the year.
~
Tyler caught Mark's eyes from the other side of the classroom, who winked at him and talked to some other students. He seemed to be familiar. Tyler also looked at every person that walked into the class. One of them might be responsible for him, might influence anything he did.
From now on, every little thing he did must have a purpose. Every little thing might change his fate. With that in mind, he sat down and tried to clear out his mind.
~
"Alright students. My name is Amy Nelson, I'm your homeroom teacher this year. The people who were in my class previous year might remember me – hopefully, or else I'd be worried about your memory. Anyways, this year we have three new students. Introductions, please!"
Tyler was the first one to stand up and introduce himself awkwardly. He sat down quickly and try to pay attention to the other transfer students – after all, it would make sense for a junior in the support division – Mark said the person was fairy new – to also be new in the class, right?
The next person was a tall, skinny guy with huge hair. He told everyone his name was Dan, not Leigh, and then sat down, his legs folding awkwardly under the too small table.
The other person was a boy with green hair and a strong Irish accent. His name was Sean, but Tyler heard Mark call him Jack. Tyler narrowed his eyes – maybe this one was his support division.
Ms. Nelson clasped her hands together. "So now that that is out of the way, let's get started on the introduction test!"
Shit. Shitshitshit.
Tyler didn't realize that was on the first day of school. He didn't even have his pencils with him. Maybe he had one on the bottom of his backpack, if he was in luck.
He wasn't.
He was almost about to give up, when he heard a cough from next to him. The boy – Ethan – was focused on his test, but his left arm was extended, with a pencil and an eraser in the palm of his hand.
Tyler smiled, but Ethan didn't look at him. He picked them from Ethan's hand, and thanked him silently. Not as silent as he thought at least, because a few students and his teacher looked at him warningly.
Embarrassing, but as he looked back at Ethan, the small smile on his face was totally worth the embarrassment.
~
Well, he completely fucked up that test.
If introduction tests were supposed to be easy, he might have to get a tutor. He got his lunch and slid down in the open seat next to Mark.
"Hey Tyler," he said cheerfully. "How is your first day here going?"
They weren't supposed to talk about the experiment in public – if someone found out, their memories would be erased and the experiment would be cancelled. But the way Mark put it made it seem like a friend was just asking another friend about their first day at a new school.
Tyler caught a head of blue hair quickly turning away.
Strange, Tyler thought, but he shook off his thoughts and focused on Mark.
"Well, I totally failed the first test of the year..." he started.
~
Tyler and Mark arrived at Tyler's apartment, Mark's plastic bags filled with beer. Since Tyler and Mark were technically nineteen and eighteen, they weren't allowed to buy alcohol but Tyler had put on puppy eyes and Mark convinced Restart Lab to buy them some.
"So, Mark, can you finally tell me who my Support Division is?" Tyler asked when they sat down on the couch and opened a can of beer.
Mark laughed and shook his head. "Well, I am. And someone in the class."
"Is it the green haired kid? It's the green haired kid, isn't it?"
Mark just laughed.
~
The next day at school the students got their tests back. Tyler did in fact fail the tests, and earned a disapproving look from Ms. Nelson. He glanced at Ethan's desk, where he saw the other boy smiling down at a 97. Tyler groaned.
Ms. Nelson knelt before his desk. "Hey, Tyler. I had a thought – since you're new here, and scored low on your test, maybe your old school and this school have different teaching methods? So I thought that maybe it'd be a good idea to get you a tutor for the beginning. Afterwards we can look if it helped, alright?"
Tyler nodded. That made sense – besides, it'd be better to go with the schoolboy cover.
"Sure. Who's going to be my tutor?"
Ms. Nelson looked around the class, then settled her gaze on Ethan.
"Ethan," she said, catching the boy's attention. He tilted his head. "Do you think you could be Tyler's tutor?"
Ethan pursed his lips, studying Tyler. "How many times a week?"
"Two would be enough."
Ethan shrugged. "Sure. When do you want to start? I'm free today if you want."
Tyler agreed, and they spend the next period awkwardly making plans.
~
Tyler was in his apartment, cleaning up all the beer cans. He might have trouble if Ethan found them. He also spend some time cleaning up his apartment in general. He didn't know why, but he wanted Ethan to have a good impression of him. Ethan seemed nice.
The doorbell rang, and Tyler straightened out his clothes. He opened the door, and in front of him stood Ethan. He was wearing a zipped up pullover hoodie and some baggy training pants. It was weird to see him without the schools dress code.
"Hi," Ethan said, and the outline of his hand in the pocket of his hoodie wiggled.
"Hi," Tyler said back and opened the door further.
"Nice place," Ethan said, looking around. "Parents out of town?"
It took Tyler a minute to realize that it would be weird for a high school student to live alone. "Uh, yeah," he lied. "Got the place for myself this week."
Then he realized how creepy that sounded, but luckily Ethan didn't.
~
"So, let's start off with math." Ethan grabbed his backpack and pulled out a the math book. "So, where did you leave off with your old school?"
"Uh," Tyler said intelligently.
Tyler was completely braindead. He didn't count on any of this – not on being questioned about his non-existent old school, but definitely not on having a cute high school boy sitting this close to him.
Ethan looked at him weirdly. Tyler wondered if Mark could come and save him from this situation.
"Ok, so you're just going to make some exercises, and I'll be checking them when you're finished. Sound good?"
Tyler nodded furiously. "Sounds great."
~
Tyler had been working for about fifteen minutes – or at least, sneaking glances at Ethan. The boy was seated on a chair, his knees pulled up to his chest. His hoodie was pulled up so there were only a few blue locks visible. Ethan looked up, probably feeling Tyler's eyes on him.
His cheeks turned a little red, and he send Tyler a small smile.
And that was when Tyler Scheid knew he was truly and thoroughly fucked.
~
Two months into the experiment
"So when are you going to tell me what's up with you?" Mark asked, patting Tyler's shoulder.
Tyler had his face buried in his hands. "Don't wanna talk about it."
"Are you perhaps not satisfied with the experiment?"
Tyler shook his head. "That's not it. Okay, fine. I like a high schooler, and that's illegal and I'm ten years older and-"
"Is it Ethan?"
Tyler nodded. If he didn't have his face covered, he might have seen Mark's smirk.
~
Five months into the experiment
It was a few months into tutoring, and while Tyler did think it was going better with school, it was still torture. Tyler's crush grew and grew with each accidental touch, with each gaze and with every second they spend talking.
"Hey Tyler!" Ethan sat down in the seat next to Tyler. He had headphones around his neck, and the music was blasting loudly. It seemed to be some kind of techno music.
Ethan must have noticed him staring, because he took off his headphones and handed them to Tyler.
"You want to try?" The music was very upbeat and happy, full of energy. He looked up and Ethan was grinning down at him, and Tyler could see the individual lashes on his eyes. Yes, Tyler was so smitten with this boy.
But Tyler had to remember that this – all of this – was temporary. While Ethan would go to college and move on with his teenage life, Tyler would get a job and become thirty. God, he was so old. Would Ethan still be friends with him if he knew that Tyler was so much older than him?
"Do you not like the music?" Ethan asked, bringing Tyler back to the world.
"No, that's not it," Tyler quickly countered. "Just a little lost in thought."
Ethan took the headphones back and sat down in class. Tyler bit the end of his pencil and tried not to think what would happen when the experiment was over.
~
Seven months into the experiment
"You do know he's eighteen right?"
"He is? N-not that it matters. He might be eighteen, but I'm 29. That's almost eleven years!"
Mark frowned. "If you're that into him, why don't you just date him while you're in high school? It's not like he'll remember you afterwards."
Tyler froze. His heart seemed to stop and he dropped his beer can. He, in all the time he spend befriending and falling in love, never stood still by the fact that all memories of him of people not related to the experiment would be erased.
He swallowed thickly, then grabbed the can again with shaking hands. Mark looked a little uncomfortable.
"It's not a crush is it?"
Tyler was silent.
"Shit," Mark cursed.
~
Eight months into the experiment
Tyler looked out of the window, where the rain was crashing onto the glass. He wondered if he would be forgotten like the way the raindrop crashed and broke or if he would silently slide out of everyone's lives.
The doorbell rang. Who would come here, through this weather?
The answer was Ethan.
He was completely soaked. His clothes were sticking to his skin, his hair was dripping onto his face and he was holding a cheap plastic bag over his head like an umbrella. But his grin was as bright as ever.
"Ethan? What are you doing here?"
Ethan gave him an apological look and a half shrug. "I was getting groceries," he said, lifting up another plastic bag. "Then it started raining and I remembered you lived close by so I thought maybe I could shelter here?"
"Sure," Tyler said, trying not to show how happy he was – Mark was just as close to the shopping centre, closer even, but Ethan wanted to shelter here. Stop it, Tyler thought to himself. Mark probably wasn't home or something.
Ethan walked in. He took off his shoes, and it was as if he only noticed right now his clothes were wet.
"Uh," he said. His cheeks were turning a little pink and he pulled at the hem of his shirt. By the wince of his face, Tyler could tell it was sticking to his skin. "Do you think I... you know, could I borrow your shower? I really don't want to catch a cold while exams are coming up..."
Tyler, again, tried not to show how happy he was. "Sure," he said. "I'll show you the way, and then I'll put some clothes by the bathroom door. I'm not sure how much will fit you, though."
Ethan smiled. "That doesn't really matter – I just need to wear it until my own clothes are dry. I'm not going to model for a magazine," he teased.
Tyler chuckled and gave Ethan directions to his bathroom.
When Ethan locked the door, Tyler tired not to think about him in there.
~
"Hey, thanks again for letting me use your shower and clothes." Tyler turned around. Ethan was standing in Tyler's hoodie and training pants, a towel in his neck.
"Uh, yeah, no problem." Tyler could feel himself blushing.
Ethan sat down next to him. "Your parents still out of town?"
Tyler nodded. It must seem weird to Ethan – every time he came over, Tyler gave him the same excuses. His parents were out of town for business, his aunt was sick and they had to visit her, etcetera etcetera.
Besides, there were no pictures of him and his family. There was only one room too, but Ethan didn't know that.
Ethan stretched – Tyler did not look at the strip of skin – and looked around.
"Do you want something to drink or to eat?" Ethan smiled and nodded.
"Yes please, thank you."
Tyler motioned for him to come along so he could choose what to drink. But Tyler realized his mistake too late.
"Whoa, Tyler, do you drink?"
The fridge was filled with beer and other alcoholic drinks. Tyler could feel his world turn black and white. This was it – the experiment would be cancelled, Ethan's memories would be erased, nobody would remember him and he would stay unemployed.
"I mean – I don't judge or anything. It's just not my thing – it's totally cool if you do drink, you know. Didn't think you were the type, but I'll just take apple juice."
Tyler let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. "Yeah, no, thank you." He stretched to get the apple juice. He thought he could feel Ethan's eyes, checking out his back. He wrote it off to his imagination but he couldn't help but flex a little.
~
They were talking about some tv-series, Tyler wasn't really aware he was talking. It felt like he was just spitting out excuses to hear Ethan's voice.
Suddenly Tyler's phone rang. Tyler apologized, then checked his phone.
Don't jump him! – Mark
Tyler cursed under his breath. Ethan tilted his head.
But, you could always kiss him! – Mark
And Tyler would if he could. Ethan was sitting so close to him, so close he could feel his breath whenever he talked. If he could just lean in, just a little...
He put his hand on Ethan's jaw. Instead of asking what was happening or backing off like Tyler expected, his eyes closed and his mouth parted and let out a soft breath. Tyler leaned in, so close, so goddamn close –
He pushed Ethan away.
~
The look of confusion on Ethan's face was making Tyler feel bad. But he just couldn't do it. He couldn't kiss Ethan, confess his feelings and then be forgotten. He'd rather be forgotten than be an even bigger part of his life.
Every second they spend together would be another black memory gap. Tyler couldn't an important character in his life. Friend, maybe, but it was borderline.
That, and he couldn't bear to be the only one with a kiss as memory.
~
Nine months into the experiment
"You can't avoid him for the last few months," Mark said.
"You'd be surprised," Tyler muttered darkly.
It had been about two weeks since the almost kiss, and Tyler had been doing a pretty good job at avoiding Ethan. Forgetting about the way he looked when he relaxed into Tyler's hand, that didn't go as well.
"Tyler." Mark's voice was even more serious than it normally was. "You have been in love for him for such a long time. You have been happy, he has been happy. Yes, he will forget about you, but you should live your live to the fullest. Because as it is now, he will remember his feelings. He will remember the sadness that brought you avoiding him, but he won't remember what caused it."
Tyler's heart stopped.
But he didn't listen to Mark.
~
Tyler was leaning onto the windowsill, a cigarette between his forefinger and middle finger. He only smoked when he was feeling exceptionally stressed – like now.
"Finally."
Tyler froze and nearly dropped his cigarette. He knew that voice – it was the same voice that made him warm and fuzzy and the same voice that taunted and haunted him in his nightmares.
And indeed. Ethan was standing right behind him. His hair was messed up and he was slightly out of breath, like he had run here.
Tyler saw Ethan's eyes flicker to the cancerstick between his fingers, but before Ethan could say anything else Tyler spoke.
"How did you get in and why are you here?"
"I think you know why I am here."
Tyler put the lit up part of his cigarette between his fingers and threw it out of the window. "I do, but I want you to say it."
"I want to talk. I know you've been avoiding me, Tyler, I'm not stupid. I like you Tyler, I like you a lot. I don't want to ruin whatever we have because of one stupid misunderstanding!"
Tyler was silent. He wanted to talk, but didn't know what to say. He wanted to keep quiet, but didn't know how to without hurting anyone.
"I just can't, Ethan."
With that he left.
~
Last month into the experiment
Tyler was standing on the podium. Ms Nelson was giving some motivational speech, but Tyler didn't hear a word. Ethan was standing on the other side of the podium, wearing a suit and an obviously fake smile. He kept glancing, at Tyler, too.
"Tyler Scheid."
Tyler received his paper, but it didn't feel real. He had no idea that other people could even make you feel like you were in a dream – or, maybe a nightmare.
Mark was waiting for him outside, him being called out earlier than Tyler. The moment Tyler came outside, Mark swung his arm around Tyler's shoulders and pressed him into his side.
"You did it, Tyler. You did it."
Tyler nodded, not being able to form words.
"So, for the job we're going to go to the lab. You don't have to choose immediately, but we're going to give you the options.
Tyler just nodded again.
~
Mark was happily explaining who everyone was and what everything did. Tyler saw where the pills were being made by a guy with a black fringe and the next person being selected by a guy with brown hair with a blonde stripe in it.
"And last but not least, Tyler, I want to introduce you to the mastermind of the support division. This wouldn't have been possible without him. He truly is the mastermind, the man with the plan.
He was slightly taller. His face didn't have the acne anymore and he seemed a little more comfortable in his body.
"Long time no see, Tyler," Ethan Nestor said.
Tadaaa
I'm happy with this ending, so if you want more there is at the end of this author note. You know the drill!
So, since it's been short since I last updates, not a lot happened.
No, that's not true, a lot happened. Just most of it is really boring or it sucked.
I recently got an injection – and the doctor put it in wrong, a g a i n. this is the second time I got the injection, and the second time it went wrong. I can't walk without pain, so it's great that I have p.e. tomorrow.
Me and my dad went to the gym for the first time in a while – normally we run twice a week outside, but this week it was too cold. I ran for 25 minutes and rode the bike for 25, my dad rode the bike the whole time. My mom really carefully told me he sweats a lot, but goddamn that was the whole Niagara waterfall on his face.
That's about it. enjoy the continuation.
"What," Tyler started, but he didn't know what to say. Ethan smiled, and it was exactly the same smile that made Tyler's heart skip a beat.
He turned to Mark. "You knew all along?" Mark nodded.
He turned back to Ethan. "You never said anything."
Ethan's eyes saddened. "Tyler, the experiment would be cancelled. I was almost as much as a subject as you are."
Tyler knew he should be mad. All the suffering he went through was for nothing.
But was it really for nothing if Ethan was here in front of him, remembering him and smiling?
He wasn't aware that he was moving, but within seconds they were in the same position as that night on the couch. Tyler had his hand on Ethan's jawline. Ethan's eyes were closed, but Tyler was still watching every breath he took.
"You have no idea how much I needed this," he whispered before he pressed his lips to Ethan's.
Ethan made a noise that might have been agreement, but Tyler was too caught up to hear it. He put his hand on the small of Ethan's back, and when they parted they rested their foreheads together.
"Don't ever scare me like that."
Ethan smiled in return, which was more of a promise than any answer could have been.