The possibility of me getting sleep that night was non-existent. Even with the slight ease I felt with Damon spending the night, I couldn't fall asleep. He sat upright at the end of the bed, hands clenching and unclenching on his lap, eyelids fluttering rapidly. He looked as if he were forcing himself to stay awake, eyes occasionally finding my bedroom window. At one point, he rose and peered out through the blinds, licking his chapped lips.
"Damon." I whispered, outstretching my hand and grasping his wrist. His head whipped down in my direction, blue eyes wide.
I pushed up from my bed and circled my arms around his waist. He hesitated for a few seconds before hugging me back, burying his face in the crook of my neck. I could hear his abnormal heartbeat, the sound of his ragged breathing. It took me a moment to tilt my head back and gaze up at him. What I saw was a sight I knew would never be presented before me again.
Damon was crying in my arms.
It was as if every ounce of his bad boy facade had crumbled to the ground, leaving a guilt ridden teenage boy in his wake. The cocky smirks, the winks, sideways glances were nothing now. He was falling apart, piece by piece, tear after tear, in my arms. Rather than step away and allow him to recollect himself, I hugged him tighter, burying my face in his chest. I had no doubt the tears had been building for years, a long time before what he witnessed a year ago.
Damon had finally reached his breaking point.
"I'm sorry." he turned his face away. "I'm sorry, I'm not usually this weak. I do-"
"Damon." I brushed my fingers against his cheek and forced him to look down at me with glossy blue eyes. "Crying doesn't make you weak. Men can cry too, it doesn't make you any less of a man to reach your breaking point."
He huffed out angrily, avoiding my eyes. "Just stop it, Micky! Do you not understand what I've done? I put you in danger, I might as well of handed you over to Craig myself."
"Damon." I snapped. "You didn't do anything wrong. I could have stayed away too. If anyone is to blame, it's me. I'm going to be the one that ends up getting you killed."
He laughed hysterically, wiping at the red rims around his eyes. "I'd much rather that be the case, McKenzie. If you were the last face I saw before I died, I'd be happy. But Craig isn't going to just kill me. He'll force me to watch him torture you."
I fell back a step, dropping my head into my hands with a sigh.
"When I was ten I saw a boy sitting alone on the playground. He was sad, so much so that my mother told me to keep my distance out of worry I'd get myself involved with something I wouldn't be able to get myself out of. I saw him every day after that, and each morning, he would be wearing the same forced smile." I said. "He never showed any sign of emotion again after that day on the playground. And I thought that he was the strongest kid out there, no matter how much I disliked him. Where is that kid, Damon? I know he's in there somewhere."
Damon buried his hands in his hair, shaking his head. "No amount of strength is going to get out of this mess, Micky. I've dug our own graves on my own."
"Maybe it's just a scare tactic, what Craig's doing. Maybe he-"
"Micky, stop." Damon's voice was so soft that I couldn't bring myself to fight back.
I sat back down on my bed and stared at him instead, awaiting his next move. The broken bad boy eventually collapsed beside me and stared at the carpet between his feet, a tortured look in his eyes.
"I'm going to get you out of this, McKenzie." he looked at me. "I promise."
*
By a miracle, I fell asleep. When I woke up, Damon was still stretched out on the bed beside me, face buried in his arm. It was the first time I'd seen him at peace in the last twenty-four hours, not that I didn't understand why. Unfortunately, he must have felt my eyes on him and shifted slightly with a grunt.
"You better get to school." he breathed, turning his attention to me.
I nudged him. "You too."
"I'm not going, Micky. I need to keep my personal life away from school."
I leaned forward and touched his clenched jaw. "Damon, you're going to do something stupid."
He laughed, falling back against the pillow and staring up at the ceiling.
"I'm Damon Fox." he whispered. "When do I not do something stupid?"
*
Rachel acted oblivious to my jumpiness. If she did notice anything off about me, she kept it to herself and decided it would be better not to push and pry at whatever was going on.
I hadn't retained a single thing I was taught by the end of the day, and stole her notes. To add to my uneasiness, Ryder joined us at the front of the school, trying his best at a conversation with Rachel. When she only turned away, he redirected his train of thoughts to me.
"Have you seen, Damon? He didn't show today." he asked.
I swallowed, my throat dry. "I don't know where he is."
Ryder shot a look at Rachel on the phone with her parents over my shoulder and tightened his grip on my arm, pulling me closer to hm. "Is he in trouble?"
"Ryder, this isn't my place to tell you. Talk to him yourself." I shook his hand off and tried to back away, but he didn't have any intent of letting me go that easy.
"He's my best friend, Micky. If you're worried about him, you need to let me know." he continued. "Please."
"Yeah, he's in trouble. But you need to stay out of it, Ryder. He wouldn't want you involved."
He snorted. "And he'd want you to be?"
"He had no choice in the matter, alright? Please, Ryder, stay out of it. It's for your own safety."
"McKenzie, what's going on?" his eyes burned into mine. "Are you in trouble?"
"Leave it alone, Ryder."
"You need to tell me what's going on, McKenzie. Now." he demanded.
I stepped forward and gently pushed Ryder a few steps back. "You need to stay out of it, Ryder."
I started to turn my back to him, but paused and threw him a look over my shoulder.
"If anything happens, please make sure Rachel is okay."
*
A dark cloud hung over my head the entire drive to Damon's apartment. I expected a car to drive me off the road or wait until I slowed to a stop at a stoplight and pull a gun on me. I was relieved when I was able to reach the place unscathed. I plucked the kitchen knife I'd pried from my drawer at home and climbed out of the car. I knew it wouldn't act as much protection, but it would buy me enough time if it came to it.
A cold feel set in the pit of my stomach when I entered the silent building. I walked up the stairs slowly, eyes darting in every direction, analyzing my surroundings. I clenched the knife in my hand and stalked down the hall to Damon's apartment. My heart sunk into my stomach at the sight of the open door.
I crept in, waving the knife in front of me. My eyes immediately fell on my diary in the middle of the room, pages torn and tossed around as if it'd been rummaged through. I started to crouch down to pick it up when I caught sight of the paper taped to the coffee table. It was a page torn from my diary with only a sentence on the particular entry.
I would have risked my own if it meant saving his life.
I had written it a little after Brady's death, but new words had been added to the bottom of it. A bold text that was easy to read and I had no doubt had to do with wherever Damon was.
How far are you willing to go to save this one, little girl?
***AN***
*Unedited*
Sort of a filler chapter, but I hope you enjoyed, nonetheless. What do you think happened to Damon? Was it Bax? Maybe Ryder got to his best friend before Craig? Or do you think Craig finally got to Damon?
Let me know what you guys think/thought!
~ChasingMadness24