The prison looked exactly as how I remembered it, only a slight smell of iron had found its way to the atmosphere in the room. I looked at them both, they were dead silent and stared directly at me. I had my computer under my arm and my two brothers behind me, ready for a fight for dominance.
I took a step forward and sat down in a chair. I placed my computer on my lap and turned it on. My father's eyes watched me curiously, nodding his head at my movements. "The whole family gathered, alone, who would ever think that would happen." My father let his eyes slide up to Antonio. "Hello, Mason, you have grown a lot since I last saw you."
I glanced back at Antonio who flinched at my father's words and kept silent though he was covered in emotions from head to toe. "Look at me, father," I told him with strong words, keeping up my walls, for now.
He laughed at my words and looked over at Mother. "Can you see this?" He shifted his eyes to me. "Our daughter has finally grown up." He laughed once again and beside me, I could bearly see my mother forcing a smile for her so-called beloved husband.
"She has," she added, her robotic voice cutting through me.
I opened up a document and drew in a breath. I looked at both of them. "Mommy, Daddy don't you know that you lost your daughter years ago?"
They were both silents after that, exactly as I wanted them to be. It was their time to listen. "I wrote this long ago, but I think it's time for you to hear it. It's time for me to tell you most of all."
"Well, we're listening, child."
I gulped and shifted my eyes to the first words. "Dad, I know you are a troubled man, but's that not the reason that I am going to say thank you. To be honest, I don't understand, because you were the worst dad a daughter could wish for. You left me alone in a big, big world and started a never-ending war inside of me. An endless thought of why I wasn't enough. I was your daughter after all. I am still hurt and the scars on my body reflect that pain, but they also reflect strength. I survived and that's a victory in itself. I may not have lived, but I survived.
You know, I always wished you the best and hoped that one day you would lay down the bottle and let your fists hang by your side. I even prayed countless of times. I hope you get a second chance somewhere else than here, 'cause I still love you even though I hate you.
You're a hopeless man and you'll probably not take any of this to your heart, which is also the reason that I have chosen not to let this be for you, but for me. You don't love mommy, you don't love Liam, you don't love Mason and you defiantly don't love me and I can't forgive you for that. I'm sorry, but this will be the last time we'll ever speak. The last time you'll see your children and the last time someone honestly will tell you how they feel.
This world is filled with fake people and I'll refuse to be one of them anymore. Please don't do anything to hurt anyone anymore. For the love of a daughter, please don't grow madder than you already are."
I closed my computer, looking into the same eyes as I had owned. I stood from the chair and tucked my computer under my arm. Behind me, Liam and Antonio had already left the room, leaving me and my parents alone.
I turned my back to my father, breathing out the breath I had held in and allowed the last tear for my father to glide down my cheeks and make me sparkle in the dim light. My heart was gunning and I knew he was the reason and it was the last time he would ever be the reason for everything.
"You really are a little me." I stopped. My father's words had been calm and filled with something strange.
"What?" I asked and turned towards him, seeing my mother creeping closer.
"Naive. You're naive, just like me. You may never come here to see me ever again, but every time you look into a mirror or see your reflection, I will be starring right back at you. You'll never escape me, 'cause I hurt you and you're fragile. Like a piece of glass, if you drop it, it breaks. I dropped you and stepped on you. You're broken."
I gulped. "Yes, yes I am, but that's what made me who I am today. You made me who I am today. And that's a good thing, 'cause my life is finally getting back on track like it's supposed to and not even you can ruin it."
"That's where you're wrong, child. You're still fearing the past, but not as much as you're fearing the future. It hunts you. Am I in your nightmares, Child? Am I the one you scream for protecting every night?" He sneaked so close to me as he could and I jumped back at his sudden movements.
I shook, even though I had promised myself to be strong.
"You know, I don't love you because I'm not that stupid. You where only an accident, a child neither of us didn't want to have. You were a girl we couldn't use for anything. You're weak, like your mother, and I don't need weak people in my family. And my favorite lie I have ever lived was ever accepting you in our family. It may have seemed like it when you were still a little girl, but I never loved you and I will never love you!"
I stumbled back like someone had pushed my chest. Tears dripped down my face and blurred m vision. This wasn't how it was supposed to happen. I was going to be strong and fix myself, not break down again.
"You're a worthless piece of-"
"Shut up!" my mother yelled and stepped in front of me as if to protect me. "Don't you dare yell at my daughter! And don't you dare say such things!" Her voices were powerful, but still trembling like a child's sad one.
Shocked I stared at my mothers shaking back as she gulped and looked directly at my father. I couldn't see his face, but he couldn't be happy.
"What!" he yelled and my mother and I stumbled back. "You love that piece of shit?"
Mothers body shook more than ever and out of reflex, I laid a hand on her shoulder. She protected me. She chose me over Daddy. Mommy loved me. She really did.
"Ye... Yes, I do and you shall not talk to my daughter like that ever again!" She moved her hand sternly to underline her point.
"Why this sudden change of heart?" he asked slowly, his voice turning steady.
"I love you, but you don't love me and I can't live like that anymore. I turned away from your flaws and told myself it was okay because I loved you. You treated your children like pawns and I ignored that because you were my world! But in reality, you only caused the loss of the only persons who ever loved me as much as I loved them; my children! And you know what? That's all they are! My fucking children!"
I was taken back by her words, but not as much as her. Her hands shook like crazy and her whole body tensed as she kept glaring at Father. "Do you understand that?" she asked him.
Silence.
"Do you understand that!" She screamed the words so the whole prison could hear it and her voice bounced on the walls and made an endless echo.
"Yes." It was a small voice that I never thought could slip off my father's tongue, but it did and it was so valuable.
"Good." She turned to face me and placed her hands on my shoulder. Her face was pale, probably just like mine, and our hearts drummed in sync to a very fast beat. "Let's go, Nina, we're done here."
We both took one last glance at him before we walked away and let the guards take him away to a place he would never forget.
My chest moved up and down like crazy and I bit my lip until it was bleeding to not scream. No key fitted in the lock. Why had my mother stood up for me?
My mouth was frozen open and although I was starring right ahead at Antonio and Liam, when they came into sight, I didn't notice what they did or said at all.
Behind them, Anthony arrived unannounced and my heart leaped as his car pulled up. Didn't I tell him to stay away? He opened the door wide and quickly exited the car. His eyes scanned the scene and landed on me. "Nina!" he said and ran towards me.
I didn't move but felt my mothers warmth behind me disappear. "Anthony?" I didn't blink and stood as paralyzed.
"I knew this would happen." He flickered his arms around me and pulled me into his hard chest. "Are you okay?"
I was more than rendered speechless and only if I was lucky, I could gibber nonsense. "I...I."
"Antonio? What happened? Did he say something to her?"
"I don't know, we left before her," Antonio told.
Anthony didn't answer but guided me to the car. "Come on, Nina, help me a little."
Everything from there went by in a blur. Only my mother's words occupied my head.
"I love you, but you don't love me and I can't live like that anymore. I turned away from your flaws and told myself it was okay because I loved you. You treated your children like pawns and I ignored that because you were my world! But in reality, you only caused the loss of the only persons who ever loved me as much as I loved them; my children! And you know what? That's all they are! My fucking children!"
Her statement was so out of character, so far from what I knew about her.
Before I knew it, I was standing in front of my psychologist door and knocking.