It wouldn't have exactly been at the top of my list of bad experiences to wake up screaming Damon's name, but it wasn't something I'd like to experience again.
My dad continued to knock on the door hours after the countless stream of nightmares that had haunted me all night. He tried all that he could; pleading, whispering, angry. Nothing he said or did struck enough fear or sympathy in me to open the door. Instead, I spent the entire morning buried in a pile of blankets, hugging my old stuffed bear against me.
The fur on Beary had matted over the years and smelt horrible, but I had refused to allow my parents to wash him. My stuffed animal had been the only thing there for comfort when I'd lost my brother, and I wasn't going to let it go, even if it was only to wash it. There were too many memories locked away inside the old, ratty toy.
"Mack, sweetheart, open the door." my dad pleaded. "Your friend is here."
I wasn't in any mood to talk to Rachel anytime soon. "Go home, Rach! I don't want to hear it."
My voice was hoarse from hours of screaming and crying. I wrapped my fingers around it, shocked by how raw it was.
"Sorry to burst your bubble, sweetheart. But it isn't Rachel." It was Damon.
Damon Fox was in my house, standing outside my bedroom door and I couldn't care less.
"Mack, honey, please just let us in." my dad tried. I sat upright, wiping my tear stained cheeks.
I heard quiet chatter outside the door for a few minutes before fading footsteps. I got the sickening feeling that my father had left for work; that he had just left me alone in the house with Damon.
"Thomas, open the door." Damon's voice sounded strained.
"Get out of my house." I snapped.
There was no way in hell I was going to let Damon in my room; not after last night-or the dreams he'd made appearances in. He had been on my mind far more than I cared to admit.
"Look, McKenzie. I'm going to ask nicely again and if you still don't want to be a good little girl and open the door, I'll have to open it myself." I couldn't tell whether Damon's words were a joke or a threat, but they struck about as much fear in me as a puppy.
I stared at my bedroom door expectantly, slowly leaning back into my pillows. Just as my eyes fluttered shut, the sound of my door clicking forced them open.
Damon stood in my doorway, waving a debit card as a smirk made its way to his face. "Nice pajamas, babe."
I flipped him off and turned away. "Get out before I call the cops."
"Your dad let me in. I didn't do anything wrong." he feigned innocence, his palm flat over his heart. I bit my lip to stop from lashing out at him, reaching for a pillow to hold over my ear.
"Wanna talk about what's bothering you, Thomas?" he sighed, staring down at the vase of flowers on my nightstand with a bored expression.
"You're bothering me, Fox. Leave." I grumbled.
If there was even a little hope he might leave, it was gone the second he stretched himself out at the foot of my bed, head propped by elbow as he smirked across the bed at me.
"Is it your little date with Greene at the dance next weekend?" he quirked a dark brow. My eyes widened in surprise.
That was next weekend?
"Well, it's clearly not that since it's pretty clear you forgot about it." he muttered. "Were you fantasizing about another way to almost get me killed?"
I couldn't fight the smile that squirmed its way to my face at the question.
"You are an idiot, Damon." I whispered.
He grinned. "Thanks."
A silence hung in the room for a few minutes, Damon's eyes roaming mine expectantly. His right hand was buried in his dark hair, a small smirk playing on his lips. He was clearly getting some sick enjoyment out of seeing me miserable.
"Why are you here, Damon?" I glanced toward the clock. "Can't you at least leave me alone on the weekends?"
A genuine grin broke out across his face. "What fun would that be? Don't forget I still have your diary, sweetheart."
I stared at him for what seemed like a decade before shaking my head slowly.
"I don't care anymore, Damon. Post it if you want. If that's what's going to make you happy and keep you away from me so I don't almost get both of us killed yet again, then do it."
He was dumbfounded; eyes wide, lips parted. He looked as if I'd just told him the world were about to end in twenty-four hours.
"You don't care?" he frowned.
"I don't care." I repeated with a nod.
The truth was, I really didn't care all that much anymore. If people wanted to talk crap, I'd let them. There wasn't anything more for me to really lose. I'd lost my brother and sister within weeks of each other, had just lost my mother, and my dad was drifting further and further away every day. Even my best friend had distanced herself a bit.
Before I could try to force him out of my room, Damon leaned forward and tilted my head up so I was staring into his deep blue eyes.
"Trust me, sweetheart, you don't want to stop caring. When that happens, you lose a grip on yourself and reality." he breathed.
For the first time in the ten years I'd known Damon Fox, I heard such raw emotion in his voice I had to look again to make sure it was still the same boy in front of me.
"Don't pretend that you care, please." I said. "Don't think we're anything alike either, Fox."
He clicked his tongue against his teeth before releasing a cold laugh.
"But you see, McKenzie, that's the thing. We're a lot more alike than you think. And honestly, it scares the shit out of me."
*
Turns out the only way to get rid of a pest like Damon was to talk to him. I expected him to run for the border the second I kicked him out of my room so I could shower and get dressed. I was a little too shocked to find him stretched out on the couch, his arms folded behind his head.
He didn't hesitate to speak the moment he realized I'd joined him. "You know I'm totally aware that I'm an ass, but what your friend said last night was just a tad uncalled for."
I shrugged, dropping my gaze to my feet.
"You know I'm totally aware that you're like a stray cat that keeps coming back because I feed him."
He chuckled. "I've been called a lot of things, Thomas, but that's a first."
I headed for the kitchen, listening to Damon drone on in the living room. "I don't see why you like Greene, anyway. The kid is a loser with absolutely no chance of picking up any chicks."
I stripped my granola bar of it's wrapping and shot a glare at the back of Damon's head.
"He knows how to treat women with respect, unlike a lot of guys I know." I muttered.
I watched Damon shake his head, a cold, dead laugh leaving him.
"I'm gonna tell you a secret, Thomas." he was inches in front of me within seconds, his long strides closing the distance between us. He trapped me against the fridge, palms pressed into the cold white surface behind me.
He leaned forward so his lips were beside my ear. "I'm not the man you think I am."
"You're an ass. You treat everyone at school like-"
"Let me ask you something. Have you ever seen me treat anyone in any way that appeared wrong or hurtful?" he questioned. "Or is that just something you heard?"
I couldn't say anything. My mouth felt as if it had been sown shut.
"That's right, Princess. I've made mistakes, I've done wrong. I still do. But I have never, in any way, treated a girl with disrespect." he finished.
It didn't take a rocket scientist to know the words that would follow his assurance.
"I don't drink away my demons, I run toward them. I don't lay a hand on a girl unless it's for comfort. I wouldn't fuck around with another woman while I'm married while my own daughter is in the house." I shook my head.
"Can't you just shut you're mouth for once minute? Is that possible?" I fought back.
He pushed away from me. "Can't you just be one of the few fucking people that actually give me a chance? Is that possible?"
I opened mouth to respond, but my mind was still trying to process his words. He took my momentarily silence as an opportunity to continue.
"All these assumptions made, all these rumors spread. Sure, I get that I'm a piece of shit, Thomas, but I thought it might be possible for someone to give me a chance."
"Damon-" I started.
"Don't fucking start with your sympathetic bullshit, McKenzie. You want to be left alone, fine." he took my jaw between his fingers, "But don't come running back to me when your entire life goes to shit."
****AN***
*Unedited*
Hope you guys enjoyed!
What do you think of Damon's confession? Do you think he's telling the truth or that it's just another lie he uses to get other girls? Do you think he'll post her diary? And, of course, do you think he deserves a chance for someone to see if he really is a decent person?
Let me know what you guys thought/think!
~ChasingMadness24