Today is a Saturday, but we have school ;-;
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
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And today is the presentation of our Math jingle project where we have to make a song or a parody of a song and it has to be related to math.
Let's just say our performance wasn't the best...
I wrote one half of the songs. It's a parody of the song 1-800-something something.... The other half was written by my other classmate.
If you don't know that song, here it is
And guess what?
I HAD A SOLO PART
My voice SUCKS! Because...
1: I don't have proper voice training lessons or whatever
2: I don't really sing much in front of a crowd. I'm very shy to let them hear my voice! >.<
But I went with it.
I think I kinda failed... ;-;
Also, we have to make an advent wreath per classroom. (It's a Catholic thing, so I'm responsible for it because I'm the spiritual leader)
Here is what it looks like
Yesterday, I asked them to bring some leaves...
But I told them to bring the wrong type of leaves.
So WOW TORI!!! YOU MESSED UP! AS USUAL
There is a good news and a bad news
Good news: I corrected them and told them the real kind of lead they should bring. Gladly, no one brought the wrong type of leaves
Bad news: NO ONE BROUGHT LEAVES AT ALL
The deadline is on Monday. And today is Saturday, we only have one chance to make the wreath and its TODAY.
AND APPARENTLY WE CANT BECAUSE WE HAVE NO LEAVES AND I MESSED UP AND NO ONE COOPERATED.
We are so lucky that our homeroom adviser/teacher is very kind and offered to help us make the wreath.
I was ashamed because it was supposed to be our job (more specifically MY JOB) to the wreath, not hers.
So I stayed behind and helped our teacher.
TBH, I didn't really do much because she was taking all the load. And I was as ashamed as ever!
Christian was nearby and the look on his face tells me that he was judging me.
FREAKKKKKKKKKKK
When he left, I told my teacher how horrible I am at leading and that I don't deserve my role as a spiritual chairman.
She said that I shouldn't be too harsh on myself (even tho it's the truth) and I was a leader because I was trusted. She was sort of saying like I was given this role for a reason... And that she believes in me.
I swear to God that she's the only person in the world that could make me feel so empowered...even if it dies down when I do something horrible again.
She was one of the reasons why I'm trying to be strong... And why I haven't given up in life yet.
God bless people like her.
...Back to the advent wreath...
We managed to get the stand done. She said that I can now go home and she'll handle the rest...
...but I didn't let her. I offered to do the wreath. (WHOAAAA TORI! FOR A MOMENT YOU BECAME A GOOD LEADER! ...just for a moment)
So for 5 minutes or so, we planned how I'll do the wreath.
I know I'm just giving myself a pile or work CAUSE WREATHS ARENT THAT SIMPLE
But I had to do it
And no, I didn't do it for grades and attention. I did it because it's the right thing...
I did it for my teacher so she wouldn't take all the work... To share that I care for her just the way she cares for me... To show her that I have taken her words to heart
I did it for Christian to prove his thoughts wrong.... To prove that I can do something for the class... That I don't just worry and let him do all the job...
I did it for the class to show them that I can be a good leader...even in just this once.... That I can take the responsibility given to me...
And lastly, I did it for myself to know that I ain't just a messed up kid... That I can do something good too...