So finally there it was. It was the day. The day of our first ever live performance. I really was looking forward to it. I mean last few days that was all I was thinking. You know I pictured that thing since forever, since the day I knew myself. And now that was going to be real. That one damn thing.
My song, it was written by Julia. It was about a person abandoned by the society who finally finds a way towards light. The words were pretty commendable. I was really really excited. Ana finally I was ready. I was dressed formally like a gentleman attending the ambassadors meeting. Didn't love that much but it was pretty awesome.
You know what's good thing about that. There were many productions attending that programme and if I could pull something up there I was, the next singer. But here's another thing your life doesn't always go the way you want it to be. And there was some awful twist that changed everything.
"The programme's not gonna happen." That voice. I still remember. But that wasn't the end. " The programme's not gonna happen the way it was meant to be." And that was the complete sentence.
There was a change. We weren't gonna sing OUR songs. Instead we would be given chance to choose some random song and for God's sake we weren't singing solo. That means I needed a partner. But who? Wait! I finally figured out who's going to be my singing partner. Who else than Kelly? So I went to her with that ' You owe me something ' look.
"So you found your partner? " I asked.
"I just knew it was gonna happen that way. God it sucks." She really hated that.
"Why don't you get a little chance to sing with me? "
"Whoa. Is that a request? " She laughed her belly out.
"I suck at that." I admitted it. God I did.
"Yah. You do. But okay. I also do need a partner. So we're helping each other here." She smiled and drifted away.
And finally there it was. The moment of my life. When the host called my name, my heart was beating at the pace of the bullet train and I found myself flying like an aeroplane.
We were supposed to sing "Meant to be " by Bebe Rexha and Florida Georgia line.
And the music hits my ear but something more important caught my eye. I saw Julia. She wasn't supposed to be there. As she wasn't from our college but still she was. She blushed at me wickedly to show that she was there in front of me. I wasn't just singing there yet I was communicating with her with the lyrics.
🎵 Hold up girl. Don't you think you're beautiful and it's easy to see 🎵
And when I sang those words she was reacting like "Really? " And I nodded my head. Actually I was having a great time. The two of my dreams were in front of me and that's worth every pain and every mess you've been through your whole life.
"You were awesome." A faint smile on the face is always admiring.
"I wasn't that AWESOME but yah I was great." I replied with a blink.
"You are surprising me day by day cheesepants." She was getting childish. It was the very first time after we met.
"Somebody missed that name." I said with that very faint smile.
"Somebody missed getting called by that name." She really was getting used to the character
"Not only that. Maybe he missed sth more too." And that was the part I was getting more me.
"Hmm. Mm maybe someone else missed that too." And finally the intimacy lead to a kiss. Not proud to say that but we were like two people who fell in love for the first time. I don't know why but it didn't seem that bad however. Whatever we do it always was great. Maybe that's what falling in love means. I was so in love with her but still I wasn't sure of admitting it. I wanted to listen it from her mouth. Maybe that's what everyone wants. The confession from the person you love.
After that wow moment with her I saw Kelly approaching me with the curious eyes.
"Someone looks pretty happy." Kelly smiled.
"I need to tell something about Julia." I decided to tell her I was feeling.
"Not surprised to hear that." And for God's sake can anyone stop this girl from smiling.
"I think I am in love with her." And there it was.
"I don't think so. " And for a moment she made me feel like whoa, really?
"What? " I wanted to hate her for saying that.
"I am sure you are in love with her dumbass. Why are you even thinking that twice. Maybe she's in love too." Her words gave me relief with the reminisces of curiosity.
"What made you think that she's love too? " I couldn't let that question inside me. Not after she told those things.
"Why she'd be in the same college you are? I mean there gotta be something you know."
"She's in our college? But the admission's already closed." A little confusion was hanging on my face.
"It wasn't close a month before. But wait! You seem like you didn't know it." She caught up my emotions.
"Not like that. I thought she only told me about that and none else." I lied. I never knew she was here.
"C'mon man. You aren't yet couples. And someone here has access to that." She smiled. But someone called her name and she smiled at me again and went away.
And there I was thinking about stuffs I'd never want to. Why would she not tell me about that? At least after all the stuffs we've been through. There's one thing about your mind. It starts thinking reckless and stupid things so fast that you can't even imagine not to think about it. There were double thoughts about her in my mind. Did she...? No she can't. And I couldn't resist the curiosity, I mean agonized curiosity. So I went around to find her but she was gone. The programme wasn't over yet. But still I decided to go to my apartment.
"You're early here." She told surprisingly.
"What? Do you have other plans? " And that is what we call irony.
"No. Just my stuffs."
"You never told me you're in our college." I interrupted her. I couldn't look at her with that question unanswered.
" So finally you know."
And there was something everyone could guess. A moment of awkwardness and silence.
"Just tell me Jules. I need to know." I insisted her on telling that.
"It's something I don't wanna tell about you. Not anyone." She was stammering as she told that .
"But why? So it is. You don't trust me do you? " My face was getting more and more blunt.
"It's not like that. I do trust you." But it doesn't mean that I should tell you everything. I have my own secrets and my own reasons. Why are you even like this? Remember the Nick I met. Embrace yourself with it, Nick." Her words, I didn't see that coming. Maybe she was right. Why should everything happen the way I picture it. By the way I always wanted strange things happening to me everyday. So why can't I take Julia herself as a mystery and be the real me?
"I still remember those times when I even wished to meet someone who has your name. Those times when I couldn't sleep because of the regret of not letting you stay. Those days a glance of you would make me alive from dead. But look! Now you're just right here with me. Why can't I live happily with the fact you're still here with me? I don't wanna know anything but just promise me you won't ever leave again." Well I just remembered the first line I told her but the other words I didn't know where they came from. Just they did. And that ended our first fight. It was cool however.
I told her that because I needed to. Maybe I was the better person here. Better person's not that who never makes mistakes. Sometimes being a better person means to give someone some time to realise her mistake. Maybe she was 50% right but she was 100% wrong but it was the best for both of us to give her some time to realise it.
Life is dynamic. You never know what thing will hit you and your path gets a diversion. But there's nothing like a smooth mountain. One day you sure gonna change into person with reason and realization. Maybe you'll get inspired by someone or maybe some incidents will bring you to that way but you know what's the obvious thing to change your life? Time. You're not a person now you used to be at kindergarten and few years from now you're turning into your mom or dad.
Time is the greatest glory. Time heals, it makes you realize, it changes and sometimes it makes you pay. And if we are meant to be together, no one can take that away from us. So that's exactly what I was doing. I stood up from the driving seat and sat on the passengers' seat and let Time drive me. It will be whatever it is meant to me. So, Why don't you sit behind and enjoy and let the things happen the way they are meant to happen? At least for a single day. Finding someone's mistakes and weaknesses is always fun. But it was the time I left fun behind and stepped out in search of happiness.
Next update soon.