so this isnt preread bc my editor doesnt reply and my friend didnt have time and i have to go to sleep soon sorry dudes
"Would you be angry if I said I would forget you?"
Tyler froze.
"...Mark told me about your amnesia."
Ethan looked up. Tyler didn't look at him, instead his eyes were focused on his hands.
"I would be sad, yes, but I just want to be your friend. Will you let me try?"
He sounded so sincere, so honest that Ethan couldn't refuse even if he wanted to. But he couldn't see why Tyler even needed to ask. Tyler was nice and sweet, and Ethan already knew he wanted him by his side when he watched the world end.
"Of course." Ethan's voice was soft but firm, and Tyler didn't miss the tone. It said "and don't you dare come back on your words."
~
Ethan laid down in bed, stripped down to his pyjamas. He sat down on his bed, drowning in his thoughts.
Would he really try to keep up with me?
He closed his eyes, a small smile on tugging on his lips. He would know. He would find out.
The logical part of his brain said that Tyler wouldn't. After all, he was only human too. Ethan knew he couldn't blame him. He knew it would be tiring, and painful to make memories with someone else and be the only one that remembered. He would hurt Tyler by forgetting about him.
But somehow, a part of him felt that Tyler wouldn't. That he would be patient, kind. He would join their small friends group. Somehow he could see him fit in – his head poking out behind everyone, a wide grin on his face and his eyes shut from laughing. They would all be smiling.
Ethan opened his eyes, his smile wider than before.
Yes, he would find out.
~
He sat down at his desk, opening his book. Whenever he ran his hands over the leather back, it felt like he could actually feel his memories. Memories with a cool, smooth surface.
Dear Future Me,
Today was Mark and Amy's wedding. Mark cried, which was definitely the highlight, maybe together with when Mark tried to act like he didn't have emotions at all, and Amy jokingly proved him wrong by making him cry again – she told him she loved him, and he just started bawling and hugging her. She had an amazing poker face the whole time.
I also met an amazing man. His name is Tyler. He's very tall and broad, which was the first thing I noticed about him. Then I noticed how easily he blushed, how broad his smile was and how his eyes were so happy all the time. I know it might sound weird, but if love was real then I think I fell in love with his eyes.
I had a breakdown, he was there. It was so strange. It was like his sole purpose was to help me, comfort me.
He asked me if I would let him be my friend. I don't understand why – he is everything I am not. But if he wants to, I want him by my side when I watch my world end.
Ethan leaned back, his arms falling along his sides. His eyes were focused on the ink before him.
His phone went off. It was a text from an unknown number.
Good night, and sweet dreams :)
-T.S.
Ethan smiled down at his phone. He felt like he was flying, riding a high.
You too!
Ethan
~
Ethan was woken by the sun tingling on his skin, as he had forgotten to close his curtains the night before. He looked down confused at his bedsheets, at his hands, into the mirror.
Right there stared a stranger back at him.
~
He was reading in his book, not even reading it anymore, just drinking in the ink, when the doorbell rang. It somehow felt empty.
Ethan opened the door, his shirt untucked, his hair a mess. He had dark bags under his eyes and his feet were bare.
"Well, you look like a mess," was the greeting of Tyler. He was completely wrapped up in a scarf and a beanie, his glasses fogged
"Thanks," Ethan mumbled back, squinting his eyes behind his glasses. "Who're you?"
Tyler's smile wavered for a bit, before returning even wider than before. "Tyler," he said calmly. "We met yesterday, you gave me your number and address." He held out a bag, awkwardly sticking out his arm in a straight line. "I brought you food," he said, the hint of a stutter behind his words.
"Thanks," Ethan breathed. "So, uh..." he stepped aside and opened the door further. "You... want to come in?"
Tyler nodded, blushing behind his scarf.
"Er... thanks for inviting me in." Tyler looked around after cleaning his glasses on his flannel. "Nice place."
Ethan stopped shuffling around to find his socks for a moment to give Tyler a sceptic look from across the room.
"Don't give me that side-eye. It's nice."
Ethan looked around his room. It was small. One side was tidy, the side of the desk was messy. Books were in neatly piled up by genre, the wall covered up in pictures, hiding the basic white wall.
"Thanks. It's basic though."
"It isn't boring though. It's you."
Ethan looked up from his finally found woollen socks, a questioning look in his eyes. "It's me?"
"Yeah. It reminds me of you."
"How?"
"I don't know. Soft, emotional. Kind. But also, even though it's simple and subtle, it makes an impression."
Ethan's movement stopped for half a second before he tried to continue like nothing happened. "You have a way with words, you know that?"
Tyler smiled, and Ethan noticed he was still standing – he internally smiled. Tyler was to awkward to sit down uninvited on someone's bed, and Ethan was sitting on his only chair.
He mentioned to the taller man to sit down, and Tyler awkwardly sat down, his long legs bent at a weird angle.
"I've been told," Tyler replied after a small silence. "I personally don't think it's anything special. I just think before I speak, so I'm sure that I'm saying what I want to say."
Ethan snorted, before plopping down next to Tyler on his bed. "Then you're being better than most people I remember." He brought their faces closer, until he could almost feel the warmth radiating from Tyler's red tinted cheeks.
"You're an interesting person, Tyler. I like you." Tyler's mouth stretched in a grin so wide, Ethan couldn't help but smile too.
"That's good, because I like you too."
~
Ethan eyes the clock standing on his nightstand, and was surprised at how fast the time passed.
"I'm going to have to go to work soon (A/N this sentence was a pain in the ass to write) but if you want, you can tag along." He laughed. "You know, order something, give me some work to do, help the business and meanwhile make sure I can be busy with you and not have annoying customers."
Tyler nodded and Ethan clasped his hands together. "Great! Just let me change, brush my teeth and we can be on our way."
~
Ethan was ready in his oversized sweater and skin tight jeans. "Alloweth us wend!" Tyler jumped up, wrapping his scarf around his neck and chin, slightly muffling the words at the end.
Ethan shook his head, but a smile was present on his face. "We're not in a Shakespearean play, Ty." Tyler quirked an eyebrow at the nickname but ignored it for the rest.
~
The walk was quiet but not awkward. Maybe it was because Ethan didn't register it as silent – he was overly conscious of his footsteps, his breath, and the ringing in his ears every time Tyler looked over at him. What was he thinking? Was it positive, negative? Was it about Ethan or was he just worried? Tyler seemed like a person that would care and worry for everyone. Maybe-
"It's cold, isn't it?"
Tyler's voice shattered Ethan's thoughts like a mirror and pulled him back to reality. Ethan nodded, not trusting his voice. It wasn't that he was worried his voice would break or sound like he was about to cry, it was more that he wanted to ask questions so bad that he was afraid the words would find their way out of his mouth without his consent.
"Do you want my scarf?"
Ethan looked up at the taller man. His blue eyes were honest and worried, and even if Ethan wanted to refuse, the way Tyler was looking at him made his head spin and his knees weak.
He nodded again.
Tyler took of his scarf and wrapped it messily around Ethan's neck. His cheeks were red and he tried to make no eye contact, instead focusing on his scarf.
"Thanks."
Tyler looked at his shoes and wiggled his toes. "It looks good on you."
The scarf was a simple light blue woollen scarf, it looked like he might have knitted it himself. The thought of the tall, muscled, manly Tyler sitting in a chair, cross-legged and humming a song – and knitting a fucking scarf made Ethan smile behind said scarf.
"Thanks."
~
"So this is where you work?" Tyler's words left a trial of warm breath behind in the cold air. Ethan nodded behind his – Tyler's – scarf.
"It's nice."
Ethan nodded again. He wondered if Mark and Amy were going to be here today. After all, after marriage came honeymoon right? Then they wouldn't show up for a couple days. Ethan didn't know them, but it would probably be lonely.
"You just go sit and order something, I'll be your waiter today," Ethan said, already pushing Tyler into a chair and walking backwards.
~
"Hi! My name is Ethan. I'll be your waiter today! Have you chosen what you would like to order?"
Tyler watched Ethan run back and forth between the customers, taking orders and running back to the kitchen, only to return with their baked goods and drinks. Tyler was leaned back in his chair, a smile on his face.
"Sir, you've been sitting here for a long time, I might have to ask you to leave. Also, stop eyefucking our waiter over there."
Tyler was at first shocked, but when the second sentence came a grin spread across his face. "Mark!" he exclaimed happily, hugging his friend. "Aren't you taking a break with Amy?"
Mark shrugged. "Amy wanted to work, and I mean, if she wants to. I don't mind. As long as I can spend time with her, I'm enjoying myself. Ethan is here too, and now are you too. I'd prefer this any day over a long week or something, doing nothing but lie in bed and not even make your own breakfast."
Tyler smiled. That was so much like him. But... "Were you serious I had to go?"
"Uh, our boss told me to tell you. He didn't say I had to kick you out, but he did seem pissed off."
Tyler nodded slowly, glancing quickly in the way of Ethan, who was still bouncing around between customers.
"Hey Ethan!" he called over. Many people turned around at the loud voice he used, but as long as it got the attention of the one he wanted he didn't mind. "I'll be going soon! I'll text you to hang out later, ok?"
Ethan nodded and dashed over to him, pulling him in a tight hug. Tyler was overwhelmed for a second, but hugged back and when they let go of each other which seemed way too soon, he leaned forward and kissed the smaller boys cheek.
"See you later, Ethan," he said, looking at his shoes to hide his coloured cheeks. Ethan smiled widely – mostly because he knew Tyler didn't see him – and kept smiling even after Tyler walked quickly out of the store and even after he went back to serving customers.
~
Ethan came home later, the sound of the key turning in the keyhole was a lonely sound now that he knew he would be alone. He fell down on his bed, arms and legs spread. He was so tired, he felt too lazy to even try to sleep.
His phone rang, telling him he had a message, and he blindly grabbed on his nightstand.
Good night!
It was a text from Amy, attached with a picture.
It was a picture from back at the bakery, Tyler pressing his lips against Ethan's cheek. Ethan laughed – from this angle it was easy to see how much Tyler was blushing. He smiled until his cheeks hurt, and pressed the button to print.
Now it held a special place on the wall of memories.
~
Ethan had always liked his job. He liked meeting new people, he liked talking to them. Some people came from far, it was interesting to hear their stories, which he would write down. Other were regulars – not that he would remember them, but they remembered him – and would ask questions he was unable to answer but made him feel like home.
The doorbell rang, and a tall, brown haired man entered. His beanie was a little wet from the rain. Ethan remembered him from his wall – Tyler. The fact that he knew his name made Ethan so incredibly happy, and he didn't know why.
"Hi Tyler," he beamed, pushing the man towards a chair. Tyler looked confused for a moment, probably wondering how Ethan knew him, but then he smiled.
"Hey," he said, his voice low but soft. "Good to see you again." Ethan nodded, not knowing what to say. Also, because he was scared his voice would break. He knew Tyler should be a forgotten memory, but when he was this close he felt so new and exciting, yet at the same time like an old friend or lover who he had known his whole life.
He smiled, even though Tyler didn't say anything. This morning he worried about maintaining friendships and relationships but ... it was more a feeling. Yes, he thought to himself. I might just be head over heels for this complete stranger.
~
Ethan plopped down on a chair next to Tyler. It was his break and all of the time he was working, he had one question on his mind.
"Tyler, are we dating?" he asked bluntly.
Tyler nearly fell of his chair, cheeks bright red. "W-what? Where did that come from?"
Ethan shrugged. "I mean, I have a picture of you kissing my cheek on my wall, you stayed here two hours after you finished your cake to wait for me on my break and I have a heart next to your name on my phone."
Tyler's eyes were focused on the empty plate on front of him and he was biting his lip to suppress a smile. "Y-you have? I mean we're not dating..." He glanced up at Ethan through his eyelashes.
"Really?" Ethan frowned. "I thought for sure... damn."
Tyler swallowed thickly, before looking up again. "I mean – I would like to. I-if you want to of course! I mean ... we haven't known each other for long –"
Ethan grabbed the front of Tyler's sweater and pressed their lips together. He could feel the warmth of Tyler's cheeks against his own, Tyler's hands carefully coming up to rest in his neck, hovering above it like he was afraid to touch him.
"Do you," Ethan started, breathing heavily, "Honestly think that time matters to someone like me?"
Tyler mumbled something inaudible.
"What?"
"I said, I didn't think you would even like me..."
"I am able to like people, you know. I can feel them, even though I don't recognize you. Time doesn't matter to me, because all I can do to know I like someone is going of feelings. Now, Tyler, will you go out with me? Will you put up with me not remembering you?"
Tyler smiled, grabbing Ethan's hand. "I will, as long as I get you in return."
Ethan kissed him again, feeling them both smile against each other's lips.
~
Three years later
Ethan woke up, feeling two arms wrapped around him, a warm chest pressed against his back and a face in his neck. His first instinct was to freak out, but something told him it was alright.
"Who are you?" he mumbled sleepily, not looking at the person. He felt the person smile into his neck.
"I'm Tyler, your boyfriend." The voice was low and masculine, but soft and caring.
Ethan noticed the pictures on the wall – after one look at the mirror he saw all of them were of him and a brown haired man. Ethan and Tyler <3 was written above them.
They were all of them doing cute couple things. Going out for dinner, holding hands, Ethan walking over the stone of a fountain and Tyler holding his hand. Ethan smiled. The one that caught his attention the most was a picture that hang perfectly in the middle.
Tyler was kissing Ethan's cheek, flushed cheeks and a wide smile on the smaller boys face.
He turned around, looking into Tyler's smiling face. "Ok," he mumbled, pushing himself closer to Tyler.
"Go to sleep, baby." Tyler kissed his forehead, and Ethan felt himself dozing off again.
I JUST REWATCHED THE NOVEMBER LIVE STREAM FROM 2016 AND AT 9:09:33 MARK SAYS TO ETHAN : "YOURE A BEAUTIFUL, BEAUTIFUL..." AND TYLER LAUGHS AND YELLS : "HEY!" AND MARK STOPS AND AAAAH I KNOW ITS PROBABLY SOMETHING IM MISSING BUT STILL
So hey I have a story. I was locked in the toilets.
So what happened – I had to make a test, and everyone was free of school except me. yaaaay. So there was only me, some new ict dude and the teachers. I had to make an economics test, so my eco teacher was like "yea u can walk in anytime and ill be there".
Well he wasn't there. He wasn't there for the whole day.
So I was waiting for him – for two hours – and I had to go to the toilets. Im only human guys. So we have these doors that close automatically behind you, and that happened but obv I am completely used to it by now.
But when I wanted to get out, I couldn't open the door.
Apparently it had locked behind me.
So the ict dude – lets call him Adam. Adam was directly behind where I was studying. He didn't say anything when I was sitting there, just stared. He was kind of creepy. I was kicking the door – yes I was trying to kick in the door, which I almost did – and he didn't come. I was yelling, kicking – and he didn't come. Fucking adam.
So when I calmed down a little, I remembered how to crack a lock like this (don't ask why I know) and I unscrewed the top screw and I could open the door.
Who is standing there, right around the corner of the toilet?
Fucking adam.
And I was like "so I got locked in." and he responded with, I quote "yea, I noticed."
He N O T I C E D and it didn't cross his mind "hey lets help that boy" no he thought "lets watch when he gets out."
Fucking adam.
Other than that, I visited my sister and it was awesome, I bought a guns n roses shirt signed by fucking slash himself and I love it so much, and I bought a vinyl of Iron Maidens Killers. We ate pancake and pizza for breakfast.
Also im dying my hair blue, just a dipdye. Ethan 2.0. both wondering when puberty will hit.
Im writing a Halloween oneshot but ill probably upload it around Christmas or something.
Bai
robout