A swirl of madness comes over us. The gurney takes me away.
At least this time it's me and not him.
I'm wheeled into the hospital into another dull room, I don't understand why they hospitalize people with the glitch anymore it's incurable, well not entirely.
But now we know that the glitch within itself can't be cured. It will always spread.
The earths a code and that code is messed up, broken.
I'm already becoming translucent like Geoff did. It's on my foot.
That's why I didn't notice it earlier. It was covered up.
My vision's getting foggy.
The last thing I see is Otto and Geoff desperately trying to keep up with the rushing doctors.
I just want to sleep but that's all too much
I can't sleep. I don't want to die and come back like Geoff did.
I know it's going to happen though.
I think I know what the key was for now. Whoever was wearing it, was the one who got the bad coding past on.
What is going to feel like when my skin becomes particles? My holographic feet feel like they're being burned and froze at the same time but it's still not the worst thing I've felt.
This hurts like hell, but it hurt worse knowing my baby was going to die.
He's not going to die anymore.
Not anymore.
At least I have that thought in my mind.
I'd much rather fade then watch him do the same.
Its better this way. It's better this way.
I'm wheeled into the ER room and know what's going to happen next, I watched Geoff get put into a induced coma, through that small square window.
That was the scene of a nightmare, and now it's happening to me. Well kind of.
Its not the same that happened to him, but maybe worse.
I'm not going to be put into a coma but I'm going to be put down.
Is it going to be painful? What will happen after.
They only started killing patients infected with the glitch once patients started to seem to live longer after they died.
I'm scared.
I don't want to die.
I don't want to fade away.
But this is all for Geoff, and that makes it worth it.
All of it.
The room is lit with black lights, they use them in attempt to calm patients down, that doesn't work.
The doctor wears a face mask that makes him seem evil in a way, of course I think that he looks evil, any animal would see the thing about to kill them as evil.
He holds a syringe, a syringe that will hold my last breath, my last heartbeat, at least my last breath before I come back.
Those last breath and heartbeat are for Geoff.
Everything is for Geoff.
I'll have some time with Geoff after this, he lived for four years. Everything will be fine.
Attempting to calm myself down isn't working right now. These black lights are making me squirm on this hospital bed, how many have died in this spot?
Nothing went how it should have. We had a day. One amazing day.
And now I'm being put down like a sick dog.
I used to be able to say that I still got my bark, I still have my bite, but now I'm cornered and I can't find my voice, and my teeth are missing.
Now they're ripping into me with these black lights.
Coincidental.
"You ready mr. Knight?" The evil man questions with his hoarse voice.
No, who would be ready for this?
He sits in the small chair next to me and puts on a pair of rubber gloves, the sound of skin to rubber makes me flinch but I nod.
"Yes."
"It's a shame you know it's always the beautiful people who get sick."
Was that supposed to calm me down?
It didn't.
"Hopefully your heterochromia eyes are the last thing to go."
Still not calming.
"Okay I'm going to count to three on three you'll feel a little pinch."
I search the room for anything to calm me down, anything.
To my luck I find the most calming thing I know.
That little window that I looked through when it was Geoff sitting on this bed. On the other side of that glass was none other than Geoff and Otto.
I keep my view of them, and realize I'm crying.
How long have I been crying?
I reach out for the window with my hand that is not being infested with a needle.
"Okay, one...two...thr..."
~~~
It's cold. The blue walls of my tiny bedroom calm the atmosphere. I sit on the edge of my bed my bare feet dangling off the edge, My cat is here. I stroke it's grey fur and she purrs softly.
I do that for hours.
Its calm.
Like nothing bad could ever happen.
I feel like this can go on for all of eternity.
It would never be bad.
So I'll just keep on stroking this grey fur, as long as I possibly can.
"Hey Awsten."
A familiar voice hums from the door.
I don't look up I simply continue petting the soft fur.
"I don't blame you."
The familiar voice speaks again with sincerity.
I don't want to look up. I feel like I need to keep on petting my cat. For forever.
"There's not much time I need to talk to you."
I don't want to talk. I want to stay with my cat.
In the pit of my stomach I know I should talk to whoever is there though.
There voice is too familiar.
"Awsten please, come on my Coolio wannabe please talk."
Now I look up. I know exactly who's at the door.
He's right we do need to talk.
Jawn.
"But you're..."
"Dead, yeah so are you."
No, I'm not dead. Am I?
"I don't blame you." He says for the second time crossing his arms, leaning against the doorframe, "this isn't your fault."
"You always blame yourself. I was the one who gave you the information, the key and the compass. I didn't have to, but I did."
"I asked you for it Jawn, it is my fault.
It's all my fault. You wouldn't be dead if it weren't for me you woul..."
"Geoff would be dead."
He interrupts moving his red hair out of his face.
"You saved him."
"You always blame yourself, but it's not your fault. You don't need to blame yourself anymore. At least not about me."
"I died because I'm an idiot. You're not an idiot." He sighs looking at his shoes. Last time I saw those white sneakers they were stained red.
"You don't have much time here. You'll never be back. This is goodbye."
He walks over to the bed and sits next to me he picks up the cat and rubs it's ears.
"You won't be back, when you fade away you don't have an afterlife. It just doesn't happen."
"The Glitch makes people go through so much pain only to let them die with no afterlife. You don't get a reunion with those you love."
Surprisingly he pulls me into a hug. For once I don't oblige.
"I don't want to fade away." I gasp.
To my surprise I'm not crying, I can't cry.
"I know."
I grasp onto his t-shirt, with an awful emotion,
Fear.
"This is the last time we'll see each other."
"This is goodbye."
"I don't want to say goodbye."
In a way I wish I could cry.
"Either way it is. This is goodbye if you physically say the words or not."
"You don't need to do anything just stay calm.
It's okay, you're only coding."
We're still hugging.
He holds onto my hair that has somehow became blue again.
"I'm sorry Awsten, I'll miss you."
"Goodbye read headed rat."
I muster the words, using the sarcasm I always use with Jawn. It hurt to say that, it hurt so bad.
"Goodbye Coolio wannabe."
~~~
I couldn't cry there but I sure as hell could cry here. I hate this room. I hate this hospital.
I hate this world.
I hate it all because of the glitch and lucky me now I have it.
I look back to the window sadly Otto and Geoff had disappeared from view, the doctor is gone. I am alone.
An awful thought hits my mind. I realize what Jawn had been explaining. I saved Geoff. He'll move on.
Otto will too.
Geoff and I won't be together after this hell.
How did things get so bad?
I won't be able to stay with Geoff after all of this. I wish I stayed dead.
Maybe then I would meet him there.
A/n the next chapter is the end of the book it is going to be long compared to the lengths of the rest of the chapters. This is a trigger warning, I'm not going to specify to what because I don't want to give anything away but if you are uncomfortable with certain subjects read at you're own risk.
This book has been so much fun to write after it's finished I don't know what I'll work on next. Should I go on with Rotten Hearts, or start a whole new Gawsten book in general?