"Okay, okay. Let's go sit down and chat, yeah?" I soothe, helping her to her feet and guiding her to the couch.
⚠️Warning⚠️- The beginning is a flashback that contains mild mentions of sexual harassment. If you're uncomfortable with it, I would advise skipping the flash back. (Sexual harassment- unwanted touching or sexual remarks)
Flashback- Grace's POV
I watched in fear as Dylan started slowly, yet clumsily undressing himself. I stand near the door of our closed shared bedroom, using my hands to cover the places that I didn't want him to see.
Once he was completely undressed, he started walking towards me with an evil smirk etched on his face. How did I get into this situation? I didn't want to. He knew I didn't want to. I was uncomfortable doing this and I would do just about anything to get out here. But I knew that if I tried to escape, I would get hit. A lot. And he would still do it to me anyway.
I didn't have a say in anything anymore. He made the choices around here now. If I chose not to cooperate, I would end up with bruises marked all over my dainty skin.
Dylan was just about to take my hand, which was shaky due to his drunken state. Suddenly, loud, muffled cried fill our ears. And I couldn't be happier to hear the sound of my baby girl. Dylan groans out in frustration.
"Go shut that THING uuuup." Dylan slurs, his eyes going all over the place. "Bu' be quiick!" He laughs greedily. I nod my head as I slip my nightgown back on.
I race down the hall and into Hazel's room. It isn't very baby friendly. There is a crib in the comer and there are changing supplies scattered all over the floor. The paint on the walls is starting to chip away and fall to the floor.
I try to tell Dylan that it's not safe for her to be in there and that if she accidentally eats a piece she could get very sick. But all that does is earns me is powerful smack in the face and a telling off that goes something like, "That disgusting thing doesn't deserve to be in our room. Plus, we have things to do." He spats at me.
I make my way over to the screaming baby. I try to be slow to buy myself time before I have to delve into my horrible experience that I should be used to now, but I hate it so much.
"Hazel, honey. What's wrong?" I ask, picking her up which uses all my strength. I wince a little as the bruises make their appearance by attacking my arms as I lift the newborn into my arms.
She calms down slightly now that she's in my arms. I try rocking her for about five minutes but it doesn't work. I sigh in frustration and panic, hoping that Dylan will be too drunk to notice my disappearance.
I have no such luck.
"GRACE!" Dylan barks from the other room, causing Hazel to cry louder.
"Well maybe if you would bloody help me she would be calm by now!" I raise my voice, but immediately regret it.
"If yooouu keep talkin' like that you're in for a rouuugh night princess." He snarls. I feel my fists clench at his remark. I would defend myself but I'm too weak and scared. And Dylan would for sure give me a proper beating, and I'm not sure if my body could handle just one more slap to the arm.
Tears start forming in my eyes then out of pure fear and panic.
"C'mon baby, please! Stop crying!" I say, my voice breaking as I look down at my poor girl. It breaks my heart that I can't provide more for her.
I stay up most nights stressed out about how I'm going to be able to support the two of us. Dylan doesn't give me anything. He just lets me stay at his poor excuse of a house just as long as I keep it "clean" and make love to him almost every night.
The constant fear and work that I do is starting to wear off on my body, making me have almost zero strength and low blood sugar. The place I hang out most now is the bars, where my consumed alcohol washes away my worries and makes me feel like I'm sixteen again.
Finally, after I bop an old and probably completely unhygienic dummy into Hazel's mouth, she stops crying. I smile and kiss her on the forehead. I lay her down in her crib and head back to mine and Dylan's shared bedroom.
"There youuu are! Finaaaally!" He exclaims, throwing his hands up into the air. I roll my eyes.
"Night-gown off." He demands, climbing into bed. With teary eyes, I slip off my nightgown and throw it to the side of the bed.
I slowly make my way to the bed, trying to wipe my teary eyes. Why am I in this predicament? Dylan seemed so nice at first! I fell so hard for him. I could've just stayed with Harry. He was so nice. I'm just so bloody stupid.
I climb into bed with these thoughts in my mind, trying to prepare for yet another night with unwanted touching and actions that Dylan demands to take from me.
Flashback over.
||||||||||
(Still Grace's POV)
I sit down pitifully on the couch as Harry cleans up the water that I stupidly spilt with my shaky hands. I thought water would take away my heavy desire of some sort of alcohol. I was tempted to go get some beer at a nearby pub before I came, but I forced myself to be sober. I'm not sure if Harry would be too keen on seeing me show up at his house with alcohol-infused breath. And it could permanently scar my chances of seeing Hazel ever again.
It's so weird to see Harry again. I haven't seen him for about two whole years! He still looks lavishing. I have missed him, I can't believe I gave up perhaps my only chance to be with him. I should've tried harder for us. For Hazel. Oh, Hazel.
Hearing her voice practically pushed my heart out of my chest. I was both sad and happy to hear it. Sad because I hadn't been able to hear it for two years because I gave her up. That was probably the biggest mistake I ever made in my life, and I'll probably never be able to live it down. I always have that grief hanging over my head like those clouds you see in cartoons when something bad happens to the character.
Harry comes over to the couch with a new cup of water for me. I thank him as he hands it to me, sitting across from me on his couch. I look at him as we sit in silence. His eyes are still that mysterious shade of green. Sometimes they would turn more dark green or light blue, but right now they are just a subtle green. The shade that his eyes were when I first met him.
"Hey, long time no see." He says finally, breaking the sick silence between us, forcing out a fake chuckle. I nod and forcefully chuckle as well. We both want to get the main point here, but there's no way to approach.
"So, uh, how's Hazel?" I ask, trying to make small talk I hopes of somehow getting to the questions that are lingering through our minds.
"She's good. A little goofball." He replies with a small smile etched on his face. I can tell he's taken good care of her for the past two years of her life.
I wonder what it was like for him in the beginning. What those first few weeks were like. Did he know what he was doing? Probably not. Did he manage to kill her? No. He probably wanted to kill me. I'm guessing he still does. I bloody left him with a baby that he probably didn't know was his. And I bloody left him in the middle of my pregnancy to be with some skunk bag who was a total wack job who hated Hazel as much as Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt probably now hate each other.
I don't know what caused me to want to come back. I guess you could say I'm at the climax of a total downfall in my life. Judging by the way I look, my life SUCKS right now. I'm not sure I'm ready to pour out my heart and soul to Harry just yet, but maybe giving him a bit of an input would be good.
"How have you been?" Harry asks after a few minutes. Is he serious? Can't he tell by my appearance that I'm having an emotional breakdown? It wouldn't take a genius to figure it out.
"Not great if I'm honest." He nods as he stares into space, in deep thought.
The room goes silent. Harry intertwines his hands together and looks down at the floor. I stare at a vase of flowers. We sit there for what seems like forever, just thinking about each other's presence in the room. The only sounds I can hear is a clock ticking and the even breaths coming from Hazel through the baby monitor next to Harry on a table.
After a few more minutes, Harry looks up at me, with tears glistening in his eyes, ready to slide down his cheeks at any moment. I can't help but look back into them with a curious look as to what he's going to say and the reason for his tears.
"Why?" He asks, his voice cracking. He lets out a small sniffle after the dreaded question is asked.
"Why what?" I reply, tears starting to form in my eyes too. I know what he's going to ask, but I'm not ready to answer him yet. I need more time.
"Why did you leave? Why did you leave me without any warning? Why didn't you let me be there?" He asks, voice wobbly a little. His eyebrows furrow as he speaks; he's getting mad.
Why did I leave? I was perfectly happy with him. It was all because of Dylan. That stupid bloody man with his stupid bloody hot dog cart. I went one day and I fell hard. He overrode my feelings for Harry. It was all about him now. His only focus was me, at least, that's what it seemed like. Surely, Harry's focus was me and the baby, but he had a career. People to please. Stages to perform. Fans to meet. Dylan's only priority was me. And I loved that. I was greedy and selfish.
So, about a week after we met, I left Harry with a single note. I didn't think about our future, or the baby. Nope, it was all about Dylan. He overrode all my feelings until my only feelings were my feelings for him. It was the worst mistake I ever made.
I look over at Harry who's still looking at me with tears in his eyes, awaiting my answer. I too have tears in my eyes.
"B-because I was scared." I answer. It's part of it. "And, I met Dylan when I was pregnant, and Harry, I just fell so hard for him. I just completely forgot about everything else. He was my priority." I explain carefully, fearing the worst for his reaction.
Once Harry has registered the grueling information, he stands up and faces me, his sadness quickly turning into anger. I look up at him with fear.
"Really? And when this happened, you didn't think about me? You didn't think about Hazel? You didn't even think about yourself?" Harry spats, using his arms to express his emotions as he looks at me with hurt eyes.
He's tearing out all my emotions and they're flooding my brain. I can't process it. I stand up too as I cry.
"No! I'm so sorry!" I cry pathetically.
"Well sorry doesn't work. You do not even know half the bloody h--l you put me through! I was a mess in the beginning, Grace! And it still isn't easy. And don't even get me started about the note. Do you think that was a proper way to say goodbye! Oh, Lord. You tore my heart out of my chest with that little sweetie pie Grace!" Harry yells at me with angry tears. And now it's my turn to get angry.
"The bloody h--l you went through! You don't even know what I went through! After I left with Hazel, I immediately regretted being with Dylan." The name slicked off my tongue like sour milk. "Dylan abused me and was so cruel to me in the relationship. I was pregnant and abused. He wasn't even there for the birth. Only my mom and dad were there. And I-" I get cut off by a red-faced Harry.
"Well, that's too bad! Maybe if you hadn't left me in the first place we wouldn't be here right now! You ruined by bloody life Grace! I wasn't even there for the birth of my own daughter!" Harry screams out with his sobs.
"Oh suurre I did. You didn't think I read the articles about you in my bloody misery? Yeah, I saw you with little perfect girlfriend. I bet you are just so happy!" I say in a fake girly voice through my anger. I don't really even know what's coming out of my mouth right now. I'm just fuming with anger. So is Harry. We're stood at opposite ends of his living room. Our fists are clenched. And our faces are red with tear tracks. We're also breathing hard.
"Yeah I did! Until Hazel came and she broke up with me after I told her what happened!" Harry shouts at me. We're both so angry and just letting out our long lasting anger for each other.
"Oh, I'm soooo sorry that your perfect little girlfriend broke up with you and it screwed up your perfect little life." I spat. "My life is so much worse than your's. You shouldn't even be complaining! At least you get to see your daughter every day!" I cry and scream out.
"Oh, so now we're gonna argue about who's life is worse? Well, in that case, get the f--k out of my house!" Harry says, slightly calmer but still pretty mad.
"You know what? fine! I just have a question." I spat.
"And what's that?!" Harry's asks.
"When do I get to see my bloody daughter again?!" I practically screech. My blood is boiling. This is like the fight of my entire life.
Suddenly, very loud sobs filter through the baby monitor. Both of our heads snap towards the monitor where the noise is coming from. Hazel must have woken up from our loud voices. Poor thing. Harry turns his attention back to me.
"Look, clearly not now. You're definitely not ready. You smell like pure alcohol and you're a complete mess. Please, just leave." He says calmly for the sake of the poor crying baby. There is still a coldness in his voice.
"But I-
"I said leave." He raises his voice. I nod my head quickly and gather my things.
I go to the door and I'm about to leave, but I look up as I see Harry running quickly up the stairs with the baby monitor in his hands, which is still producing loud, upset sobs.
I sigh a deep breath before I shut the door behind me and head to my old and rusted car. I definitely need a new one as this one probably should not be on the road.
I get in it and lay my forehead on the steering wheel.
This did not go well.
Author's Notes-
I CAN EXPLAIN.
Okay, so during this last weekend, I've been battling a sickness. And I still had it today so I basically spent the entire day writing the chapter. Yes, I did write this in one day. I HAVE NO LIFE.
Anyway, HOLY COW THAT WAS INTENSE. That did NOT go well.
This is probably my favourite chapter I have ever written!
I sincerely apologize to anyone who was upset by the flashback. Normally I don't like to write stuff like that, but it was kind of necessary. Sorry. There probably won't be anymore chapters with stuff like that in it. However, that one did contain very important facts.
Please! Let me know your thoughts. Predicaments on what's going to happen in the next chapter?
Thank you all so much for the support and lovely comments on the last chapter! I was overwhelmed with happiness and I just can't thank you all enough.
Until the next update, just keep reading!
HSFanFicTion1994