*italicized paragraph are flashbacks/dreams/mind links/thoughts
Title from Leona Lewis
Jean’s POV
I watch on my peripheral as Hope make her way toward Chance’s room, still keeping a watchful eye on Dean.
I knew that Eric and Cole didn’t trust him, but I never expected this.
The moment I heard the door slammed close I knew I had much to explain.
I wasn’t planning to tell her now, maybe not during an emergency or in a couple of years, when I finally had the guts to do so.
Not like this.
Never like this.
Cole and I were on our way back after a day of well deserved alone time.
I was dead tired but for some reason I wanted to come home to the Pierce. There was an unsettling feeling in me that didn’t sit quite right with me.
“You ok?” Cole asks me from the driver seat.
I turned to him from the window and forced a smile, “Just tired, that’s all.”
He chuckled, “Can’t blame you there.”
I rolled my eyes and hit him on the arm playfully. He caught my hand and kissed my knuckles again, just like he did earlier, and the whole day- only on other parts of my body.
Before I thought sex was the best sedation and pain killer, but somehow, the unsettling feeling was killing my bliss.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Cole frowned.
“Huh?”
“You’re shaking.” He says, as he grabbed the coat that was hanging at the back of his seat and set it over my legs, trying to warm me up. I already had his hoodie on over the minimal clothing I planned to leave on earlier.
“God Jean, you’re shaking.” He says, about to pull over.
The moment he took my hand an image of Hope flickered to my mind, a very scared Hope.
“Hope…” I gasped.
“What? Where?” he looks around.
I’ve watched how Cole and Hope grow close the past few days. I don’t know if it was because Cole lets her do anything she pleases and calmly explains to her when it’s too much.
Or it can be the connection. I thought and my wolf growled in agreement.
I sighed and shook my head.
As long as I don’t think about it Cole wouldn’t find out.
“Sorry, I just…” I sighed and closed my eyes as Cole finally pulled over and gave me his full attention.
“Baby, what’s wrong?” he asked worried.
“It’s nothing…” I forced myself to say and looked up at him, wishing now that I didn’t.
His face was covered with fear, disappointment and guilt.
“Are you regretting that…”
“No!” I sat up quickly and reached for him, wanting to be in his arms again, “God, no Cole… never think of that, please…”
I heard him gave a sigh of relief.
“Then what’s wrong?” he ask after pulling away from my hug and looking me deep in my eyes.
“I don’t know…” he rolled his eyes, “I’m serious Cole, I’m antsy and nervous all of a sudden.”
“Maybe you’re just hungry.” He said. “Scared of what your surrogate brother will tell you once you step through his door?”
I stared at him thinking of what he just said.
I knew his scent mixed with mine was more prominent now. It was all I can smell on me after all, but it isn’t that.
Eric and Serenity would probably throw a party once they found out we’ve made ourselves official and exclusive.
“No, it’s something else…” I close my eyes, then another flash of Hope crying flickered in my mind. “Something’s not right.”
“What?”
“We need to get home.” I said.
“Are you-“
Then as if on cue, Eric’s voice confirmed my guess.
Hearing Hope call for her mother broke my heart, I knew it wasn’t me she was expecting.
She was waiting for Serenity.
But that was my fault wasn’t it? I begged Serenity to do the impossible.
I begged her to take her from me in exchange that she lives.
“Serenity, please…” I begged, I was watching the doctors revive her.
My baby.
Cole and my baby.
As we have expected she was too weak to live. She could barely breathe on her own much more do anything else.
And it was because of the bond, the stupid bond which I chose to neglect in exchange of getting the life I wanted.
I was paying for it big time.
“Serenity…”
“What you ask for is just too much Jean.” She says, “I’m sorry.”
“You’re a freaking deity who can heal any wolf! Why not my baby?!” I screamed.
“Cause you wouldn’t be able to handle it.” she said, taking me by surprise. “It isn’t a full moon Jean, and the only way I can heal her is by blood.”
Vampire blood.
The same blood that had saved her from Yuri.
“The bond between you and her would be broken beyond repair.” She continues, “You will not be able to sense her, feel her wolf… she might not even have a wolf.”
She stared at me, pleading with her eyes for me not to ask her again.
“It will break you both.”
But I knew what I wanted, I didn’t have to be her mother. I just wanted her to live.
“She’ll have your blood then.” I said, “Save her, let her live and let her be your daughter.”
“What?”
“No one would notice.” I said grabbing her by the hand. “We were supposed to have given birth the same week, we’ll say you had triplets…”
“Jean, no.”
“Serenity please.” I begged her again, this time, tears found its way to my eyes and down my face. “I just want her to live, I don’t want her to pay for my mistake.”
Serenity just stared at me, but I knew that she made up her mind.
That night she made Hope drink her blood and at the same time made a small bite on her, injecting the same blood on her system.
The next day she was like a bouncing baby girl.
But it wasn’t the end.
The bond between her and us haven’t broken.
And the longer Cole was absent, the weaker she got.
Eventually she had broken into that bond when she was just four.
Her heart was too weak for her, barely grew with her, so we needed to get her a new one.
She had three heart transplants and on her third one I felt no bond with her. Except for the longing of a mother to her daughter.
Serenity never asked me to stay away, she never insisted that I let the bond break naturally.
She actually drew us together, she’d make girls’ day out.
Make us go shopping or just plain hanging out at the house.
I saw Hope grew up to the young lady that she is now and I refuse to have that cut short.
“So, care to tell me why you’re daughter isn’t sporting your scent?” Dean asks me, smug.
I kept my eyes on him, not giving in to his taunting as I moved to my side blocking his way to Chance’s room.
“You wolves and your connections are funny,” he said, “you try so hard to protect them, not knowing you are hurting them.”
I growled at him again, actually telling him to shut up.
“If you wanted your bond with your daughter to break, you should have just said so.” he stopped and stared at me, a smirk masking his face. “I would love to help.”
With that he lunged, I moved sideward, and caught him by the elbow and threw him back, before he could get near Chance’s door.
It was a small room to fight in, but if it meant that it will protect the children, I don’t care much about the area.
He gave a laugh, holding his broken shoulder, I hear a bone popping back in, blood running down his arms. Blood?
“You shouldn’t be so surprised.” He says standing with pride and his eyes lit with craziness, “You should be familiar with half- breeds, your daughter is one, isn’t she?”
I lowered myself to a pouncing position and growled.
“C’mon, she wolf, you know she doesn’t belong with wolves.” He says as he struggles to stand. “She has that certain familiar scent on her, much like Mrs. Pierce, only more…” he met my eyes, “vampire like?”
I lunged at him no longer patient of his trash talking. But this time he fought back. He elbowed me behind the neck and kicked me on the gut, I moved away and moved back to attack stance and jumped on him again.
Before I can stop myself, I caught him pulled out a dagger and swung it in front of him, catching me on the chest.
I landed on the side, feeling the pain of the slash he made.
“Would you like to try again?” he asked.
This time he attacked. Lunging at me while swinging the dagger at me, I moved away, still trying to get my momentum back.
But I was slowly getting dizzy. My wound wasn’t healing and I was bleeding badly.
Finally I got enough strength to drop on the ground as he swung his dagger just few inches above me, I bit his arm hard until bones cracked and flesh tore. I threw his armed arm across the room and jumped on him, pinning him on the floor, snarling at him.
“Wow, who knew a wolf can withstand a silver mercury.”
Mercury? I thought.
“Yeah, just a little experiment of mine.” He says, cringing in pain, as I pressed on his collarbone harder. “I wondered what mercury would do to you, it’s much like silver isn’t it?”
Then I broke into another growl before I slashed his throat and rip off his head.
He was a vampire, it was necessary to mutilate him.
As soon as I was sure he was dead, I move away, swaying, I hit the wall and leaned for support.
The room was spinning and it was getting harder for me to breath.
No… no... fight this off… I told my wolf. We’re finally getting our family together, don’t give up on me.
With that she shook her head and tried to clear her head.
She looks ahead and took a step toward Chance’s room.
Let me out, I tell her, let me out and I’ll check on how bad-
But she shook my head, she was still worried and scared. She was protecting her pup and it was the only time she could openly do so. So I just tried to calm her.
We did good, girl. I said, forcing a smile. We did good.
She gave a very low yelp of agreement making me laugh halfheartedly.
I can feel the pain and the want to sleep take over, and so did she. We were already in front of the door when she dropped on the floor, facing the stairs, as if she was expecting more vampires to come and would fight them off.
We aren’t alone anymore, I said, he’ll know what to do if you call for him.
My wolf laid down on her side, her breathing was more labored now, her sight slowly fading.
Call for him… I urged her call for our mate.
I felt her take one last breath and gave a short and low howl before everything disappeared in darkness.