commitment:(noun)
1. the state or quality of being dedicated to a cause, activity, etc. "the company's commitment to quality." -synonyms: dedication, devotion, allegiance, loyalty, faithfulness, fidelity, bond, adherence, attentiveness "her commitment to her students continued undiminished"
2. an engagement or obligation that restricts freedom of action. "with so many business commitments time for recreation was limited." -synonyms: responsibility, obligation, duty, tie, charge, liability, burden, pressure; undertaking, task, engagement, arrangement. "he resigned because of the pressure of other commitments."
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"Needle and the thread gotta get you out of my head. Needle and the thread, gonna wind up dead."
Song - Stitches
Artist - Shawn Mendes
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Joe
I wheeled myself into Harry's loungeroom, I stared at the massive television hanging on the far wall. Although my eyes are glued to the black screen, my mind is elsewhere.
Is Harry going to propose to me? Am I ready for that kind of commitment?
Probably not.
There's just so much happening in my life at the moment, and I'm not sure if I'm ready for marriage just yet. Maybe I have it all wrong? Maybe it isn't an engagement ring and it's a promise ring. I hope it's a promise ring because I'd fucking hate to say no to him.
Rejecting Harry would ruin me, it would ruin us.
I don't want to say no to him but I'd have to.
Right?
Wrong, I don't have to do anything. I love him, so if Harry thinks we're ready to take that step, then I'll take it with him.
I hope.
My phone suddenly vibrates on the kitchen bench.
I'm sick of being in this wheelchair.
I wheel myself over to crutches resting on the wall near the sofa, placing my good leg on the ground I pull myself off the seat of the wheelchair and rest my body against the wall. My hand wrap around the crutches handles as I place my broken leg on the ground.
Surprisingly my leg isn't what hurts the most, it's my ribs. But I manage to make it over to the kitchen bench and pick up my phone.
Three missed calls from Luke, eleven text messages.
I dial his number.
After two rings Luke answers, "Joe, shit, I'm so sorry-" His voice is laced with sadness. "I-I tried to talk her out of it, b-but-"
"What's going on? Luke? Where's mum?" Fear overtakes my body and causes it to tremble.
I hear a small sob from the other end.
Luke's crying, he rarely ever cries. "J-Joe, she's gone-"
"Gone? What do you m-mean gone?" Is my mum dead? "Luke! What happened? Is mum okay?"
"What? yeah, she's fine, ooh! I'm sorry sis, I didn't mean it like that--we--um, w-we-"
"Luke! Spit it out!"
I wish to god I hadn't asked him, what he says next makes me gasp. "M-mum moved home, she's in Melbourne. I-I'm at the airport, my plane l-leaves in five minutes... J-Joe I'm really sorry, I guess mum couldn't handle seeing you hurt so-"
"Y-you both abandoned me? H-how could you Luke? I-I have no family in London! F-fuck! W-where am I g-going to stay! Luke! Wh-hat do I do?"
"I'm sorry, I have to go. I love you, Joe."
And just like that, the line goes dead.
I feel numb.
I feel dead inside.
There's this gigantic hole in my chest.
With everything that's been happening, Henry, Zayn, tattoo's, mum dying of cancer, the accident, being pregnant... They left me.
My family abandoned me when I need them the most.
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My eyes open to a white room above me and white sheets over my body.
"Joe, you fainted." I follow the sound of Harry's voice to discover him standing at the end of the bed.
I'm in hospital again, fucking great.
I groan sitting up against the pile of pillows on my bed. Memories of the short conversation with my brother come flooding back, and like a spillway to a damn, tears escape my eyes.
"Shit, Joe, what's the matter, baby? Are you hurt? I found you passed out on the kitchen floor, are you-"
"They're gone, Harry,"
He runs around the bed and sits next to me, pulling my body into his embrace. I grip his shirt and cry against his chest. "Shhh, it's okay,"
"They left me!"
"Who? baby?"
My body shakes as I sob, "Mum and Luke, they're back in Australia... I-I have no one-"
"You have me, you'll always have me. Joe, never forget that I love you," He soothes me, rubbing circles on my back. "You have me and our little peanut."
I half sob-half chuckle at his nickname, "Peanut?"
"Yeah, cause he's going to be strong and he's only little."
I lift my head up to look into his eyes, "How do you know it's a him?"
"Call it a-"
"Good evening lovebirds!" Harry and I glance at the doorway, Calum stands there and holds the door open as a nurse pushes a machine in. "Ready to see what the miniature Harry looks like?"
Miniature Harry?
"Am I missing something?" I watched the nurse bring the--I'm guessing Portable Ultrasound machine to my bed.
Both Calum and Harry shook their heads.
"I'll leave you with Rach," Calum whispered something into her ear and left.
Rach grinned at both Harry and I. "Are you guys excited?"
I hadn't really thought about the fact in under six months I'm going to be a mother.
"I guess?" I replied as Harry wrapped his arm around me.
"Let's take a look at that belly," Rach pulled my shirt up so it was just under my breasts. "I'm gonna put some gel on your tummy, it'll be cold okay?" I just nodded my head.
Harry and my eyes were on her, she placed gel on me. She was right, it's fucking cold! It caused me to jump, my reaction made Harry snicker.
"Dick," I grumbled, rolling my eyes as Rach pressed a white--I forgot what the things called, the thingy she uses to see the baby.
Rach suddenly froze and typed something on a keyboard. Her eyes glued to the screen, I watched as her mouth became parted.
"Is there something wrong?" Harry took the words right out of my mouth but Rach shook her head. "Obviously something is wrong, you need to-"
"I'll be right back." She hurried out of the room, leaving both Harry and me stunned and confused.
I looked up at Harry, his arm squeezed me gently. "I'm sure everything will be-"
"Okie dookie! Let's check this shit out!" Calum yelled walking in with Rach behind him. "Rach, can you show me what you saw?"
The nurse nodded her head and walked over to the Ultrasound machine, she once again placed the probe thingy on my stomach. "See? is that what I think it is?"
"Is it a dick? Please tell me I was right and we're having a son." I swear I could feel the smirk against my forehead when he kissed it.
"How on earth do you know it's a boy! We could be having a daughter for all you know!" I huffed at him.
Harry chuckled, kissing my temple this time. "I'm one hundred percent sure, what they're seeing is a tiny wittle willy. I'm right aren't I Calum?"
"Actually-"
"No, he's not. I have a feeling I'm going to have a fucking girl,"
"Nope, boy."
"Girl."
"He's my son."
"My daughter."
"Guys!"
"Shut up Calum!" We both yelled at the same time.
But when we turned out heads, Calum had the screen rotated in our direction so that we could see it.
"It would seem you're further along than I first thought. Judging by the twins development, and regardless of how small your stomach is, I'd say you're roughly 14 weeks."
"I-I'm sorry? Did you just say t-twins?" Harry asks, gobsmacked.
I was lost for words.
Twins?
"I did indeed," Calum chuckles. "Congratulations Styles, your baby maker is brilliant, it's given you double trouble. But as you can see the twins are in separate bags, meaning they're not going to be identical. I can't really tell the sex's at the moment, but if I'm mistaken you're both right."
"W-what?" Harry again talks for me.
"You may be having a girl and a boy."
Fuck me sideways, and backwards too.
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A/N
Harry did fuck you, Joe, that's how you're---ok, never mind...IGNORE THAT COMMENT GUYS, I got carried away! *Hides*