Rule#53: Bad is never good.
Never fall for a badboy because they are, and forever will be, one thing:
Trouble.
And nothing good can come out of trouble.
Bringing the phone to my ear, I take a deep breath to calm my nerves. Madison stares at me, a weird mix of worry and wonder on her face. I’m sure she is beyond confused on why I’ve went from wanting to text back Ian to calling Jace.
The same time the first ring blares from the other side, Madison opens her mouth. She is no doubt about to voice her own very serious concerns. When it comes to her, she is always concerened about something.
“Why the bloody hell are you calling Jace!” She hisses loud enough to almost wake the whole house. For all I know, they all could still be awake. Not that I am willing to take that chance. I reach forward and grab her hand, quickly pulling her behind me out of the kitchen.
The last thing I need is Ellie hearing her. Imagining my sisters face upon hearing that I am, indeed, about to call Jace Stone is almost worth it though. She would probably freak.
I quickly make my way up the stairs, Madisons hand still in mine, and reach my door the same time the ringing clicks over to a very tired, very familiar voice.
“You better be dying.”
Rolling my eyes, I let go of Madison's hand and push open my bedroom door. Darkness greets me and I make weird hand motions hoping she will understand that I am trying to tell her to turn on the lights.
She lets out a small exhale of breath before knocking into my shoulder on her way to finding the light switch. Clearly she is not happy about this new revelation.
“I’m not dying.”
The sound of him moving on his bed fills the phones silence before he lets out a frustrated sigh. I no doubt probably woke him up.
“Fine. Then please tell me that a car of Victoria Secret models just broke down in front of your house on the way to a fashion show and need my help.”
I take a deep breath, trying not to laugh. It’s so not the appropriate thing to do. Encouraging Jace just makes him continue to voice is wild imagination and horrible innuendos.
White light suddenly washes the room in white, momentarily blinding me. I bring my hand up to block my eyes and squint through the brightness. I blink a few times till my vision adjusts, letting me finally see Madison taking off her shirt.
“Does my best friend in her underwear and bra count?”
“No.”
“I’ll even add those silly wings if you want. I have a sheet in the closet?”
“Unless you plan on suffocating yourself with said sheet, I have no interest in it.”
I can hear the amusement in his voice and I slowly sit on the edge of my bed, not succeeding in keeping the small smile off my face. For some reason he always makes me smile at the most oddest times possible.
“You know what else sheets come in hand with? Burying bodies. Just as efficient as a trash bag. You know what they say, eco-friendly is the way.”
Madison must hear the teasing in my voice because she throws her shirt at my face. I quickly dart out of the shirts way, shooting her a hard glare. She rolls her eyes before mouthing Ian.
“Ender,” Jace drawls. “If you called to flirt with me, you shouldn’t have. I like flirting in person, that way I can give my mouth better things to do.”
I try not to blush as I try not to imagine all the things Jace could do with his mouth. If his reputation precedes him, he really is a god in bed. He probably knew things way beyond my own vocabulary.
Though, I’m not going to tell him that. It would just boost his ego and encourage him. I'm half tempted to say prove it, but that just makes me envision him actually following through with his promise. While I'm sure it would be a wonderful experience, it's not something I'm about to admit to thinking about.
“The only thing your mouth will be seeing is my fist when I hit you in it..”
Madison raises an eyebrow at my statement, picking up on the word mouth. Jae’s deep, beautiful laugh is the only response he give me.
My stomach twists when I realize just how much I really enjoy it. If need be, I probably could spend the rest of my life just hearing his laugh and be content enough to never hear anyone elses.
Hoping I don’t sound breathless, I begin to explain to Jace the reason why I really called. “Ian texted me.” I’m met to silence and I wonder if he’s still there as I continue.
“And I called because I am going to borrow my bestfriend phone, call you on it, and then text Ian. That way I can finalize plans with him that match our schedules. I need this date to go perfect, so therefore, we need to prepare for it.”
“Man,” Jace responds, forever sarcastic. “You make it sound like you are going into battle. Whatever happened to simple hand holding and goodnight kisses?”
It’s obviously a rhetorical question so I don’t answer it. Instead, I fold my legs up on the bed and lean against the headboard.
“So, about this Ian and date thing,” I start, but he cuts me off. “Did you really call me for this? Because, we both know you could have easily told me when the date was and I would have dropped every per our agreement. And I know you know this Ender.”
I want to reach through the phone and smack him. Cause he is right. So, so right. And, deep down, it pisses me off that he’s so spot on.
I want independence, to be able to do all this stuff on my own, but the minute I’m faced with a daunting task of simple women trying to get man scenario, I’m left with nothing but Jace.
He knows what men want to hear. Sure, I could text Ian and try my hardest to flirt, and I could succeed. But the chances are too great if I miserably fail.
So I would rather go to Jace and have him help me then to test my luck.
Though, him blatantly pointing it out, does nothing to help his cause. Maybe I am turning into an evil person, because every time Jace opens his mouth, I don’t know if I want to hit it or kiss it.
Wait, what?
I shake my head and quickly get that idea out of my head.
If life was simple, maybe I would have kissed him. Why not? He’s cute, funny, and there when I need him. Sure his past is obscured in secrecy and he his more infuriating than the typical teenage boy, but all those qualities is what made him, well, him.
But that doesn’t matter.
It doesn’t matter how many times he makes me laugh, or smile, or brings thoughts of me kissing him to my mind. He’s nothing close to the man I am trying to find. He’s the opposite of perfect.
And while one kiss technically means nothing, I don’t want it to become absolutely everything.
“Jace,” I start, hiding my face in my hands. “Please just don’t go there.” I can literally feel his sudden anger through the phone. Which I can understand.
Some girl he barely knows is calling him in the middle of the night, when school is right around the corner. Plus, he’s still being blackmailed due to his unflinching love to someone else.
Right now he probably hates me more than anyone else currently in his life.
“Shut up and listen,” He says calmly from the other side.
I open my mouth, my instinct to argue back taking over. I quickly clamp my mouth shut and peek over at Madison. She’s too busy inspecting her nails to be paying mine and Jace's conversation any thought.
“When you asked me to do this, to help you with all these dates, what were you expecting Ender? For me to hold your hand and be with you every step of the way?” I want to tell him no, but the word get’s stuck in my throat.
He, oblivious, continues.
“Do you want to know why I think you blackmailed me? Not because you need my help, but because you need someone in your life to tell you you can do it. You want someone there to fall back on when everything goes to shit. It’s not because you can’t flirt, or talk to guys, or be a normal girl. It’s because you are so scared that you will fuck up that you are too frightened to actually go out there and try.”
My throat closes up with his confession and my eyey burn. I quickly shut my eyes to keep from crying because this is so not the time for this.
The fact that Jace is so easily able to look at me and see all my hidden secrets, all my concealed demons, is unnerving.
He let’s out a tense breath.
“And you know what Sunshine? It’s okay to be scared. It’s okay to look at someone and not know what the hell you are doing. The best part though? Is that I will be here. Every time you fuck up, I will be here to help you pick up the pieces. You don’t need me to help you get guys. You just need my reassurance that you know what you are doing.”
I quickly wipe away a tear that has fallen and open my eyes. I turn away from Madison so she can’t see the thousand of emotions flashing through me.
Jace has taken my heart and flipped it upside down.I don't think it is no longer in my chest. I bring my hand to my chest and feel it under my fingertips, making sure it is still able to function.
Beat beat, pause.
Beat beat, pause.
Beat beat, pause.
“Jace,” I say softly, hoping he can’t hear my feelings in my voice. “I might not know you, orwho you are, but there is one thing I know for sure; Brittany doesn't deserve you.”
He laughs on the other side, but it’s not filled with humor. It’s a dark, sad kind of laugh. “Brittany is the only person I deserve.” Before he can elaborate on what he just said, he let’s out his breath slowly.
“Go get your guy Sunshine. I’ll talk to you later.”
I hold my breath as I hear the a click and then dial tone. Letting it out, I push my phone into my lap and stare at it in my hands.
What was supposed to be me calling Jace to get advice turned into something way beyond that. I don’t even know what to think or do about what he told me. I'm honestly more confused then ever.
“You know,” Madisons chirps from the other side of the bed. “If I didn’t know better, I would say you like him.” I let go of the phone and scrunch my nose up at Madison. I seem to do it every time she says something ridiculous.
“Be realistic Mads. I barely know him.” She turns on her side and props her elbow up, her head resting on heropen hand.
“I’m not saying you love him, or that you like him more than the average guy, but somewhere in that heart of yours, you are starting to maybe care for him. You don’t have to know someone to know how their heart works.”
“That makes no sense,” I say, grabbing my phone and matching her stance. “If I don’t know someone how can I possibly care for them?”
She let’s out her breath, her brown hair going up with the small effort.
“Think of it this way: You might not know know him, but you know him. Like, you might not know why he get’s angry all the time, but you know the extent of that anger. You might not know why he’s smiling, but you know it means he’s happy. And, god, when he does or says certain things, you might not understand them, but you know him enough to know there is a reason behind it. That’s what I am saying. You might know know this kid, but you know him enough to place a little bit of your heart in his hands. You might just care for him in a friend way, but that’s still enough to get you hurt in the end.”
It makes sense in a way. I might not know Jace and who he is, but I know enough to be able to tell if he’s worth caring about. I think back to that moment at the festival, where he looked so lonely, and I think that was the moment.
The moment my heart decided he deserved a little piece of it.
I flip on my back and stare up at the ceiling. “I hate when you are right.”
She pokes my arm and I turn my head to the left to see her bright smile.
“I know. But, Ender, make sure you don’t give him all of your heart. I know first hand what it is like giving it to the wrong person.” I reach over for her hand and squeeze it. She does the same back and I shake my head.
“There is no way Jace can have my heart. It’s mine and it will remain that way.” She drops my hand and laughs before reaching over and picking up my phone.
“How about we deal with Ian's heart instead?” I roll my eyes and snatch the phone from her. I quickly open up the text and reply with a simply hey. I even put a smiley face.
His reply comes faster than I anticipated.
Ian: Ender Ender Ender.
Me: Yes?
Ian: I just like typing your name.
Me: Oh, okay. So I see that you had no problem getting the number right.
Ian: I made sure of that(;
Madison leans over and eyes the conversation with a raised eyebrow. When she get’s to the winkey face, her other eyebrow shoots up. “Ask him if there is anything else he’s made sure of.” I tear my gaze from the phone and stare at her insidiously.
“That makes no sense.”
“It makes perfect sense.” I roll my eyes and type back a response.
Me: I remember Adam saying you were new to town. Is that right?
Ian. Ah, yes. I came down from Ireland about a week ago and have been at Adam’s parents mercy since. They're old friends of my parents and when they decided I needed to see more than Ireland, they thought America would be the perfect fit.
Me: And how is America living up to your expectations?
Ian: As of right now? It’s everything I thought it would be.
Madison's high pitched squeal breaks through my concentration. I almost drop my phone as I turn to make sure she’s okay. She’s staring at Ian’s response with a big smile plastered on her face.
“Oh my god Ender, he is saying that you made his American experience.”
I shake my head and type a reply. I will not focus on how my heart is doing weird things in my chest.
Me: (:
Ian: I was thinking about going to the beach for the first time since being here and wanted to know if you would like to join me.
Breath, Ender, breath.
You go this.
Me: I hope you are not asking me to be your American tour guide. I look horrible in red, white, and blue.
Ian: As funny as that would surely be, I was thinking of calling it something different.
Me: and what would that be?
Ian: A date(:
My fingers freeze on the screen and Madison brings in a sharp intake of breath. An excited and slightly nervous knot forms in my stomach due to concealed anticipation.
This is the first time a guy has ever showed outward interest in me. And while it’s strictly for my checklist, I can’t help but grin obnoxiously.
My first ever date.
Madison must see my giddiness because she throws her arms up in the air and screams. “Ender has her first date!”
“No one cares!” Ellie screams suddenly from the room next to mine. Madison turns on her stomach and replies even louder.
“Screw up, Ellie! Oh, wait, that’s right no one will!”
“Mom!” Ellie shouts and soon we all can hear another scream from another room.
“I swear to god, if I hear one more scream, you all are sleeping outside!”
“Awh, Ella, they are just being kids!” Frank says, less loud than all of us. Sadly, due to how close our rooms are, we can still hear him.
I hear Ellie slam her hand against the wall before it get’s quite again. Madison meets my eyes and shoots me a mischievous smile.
“I don’t think this night can get any better.” I shake my head before quickly replying to Ian.
Me: Sounds like a plan. Time and day?
He quickly replies with the answer and I send him another smiley face before turning my phone on silent and sitting it on my nightstand.
Now that the date is actually going to happen, I’m not about to ruin it with more horrible text talk.
I lean against my headboard and close my eyes.
“This school year is going to be different. Just like I said.” Madison states before standing up to turn off my light.
I keep my eye close as I feel the bed dip, no doubt her returning. I slide slowly down my bed and open my eyes.
Light front the window splashes the ceiling in pale white and I stare at it until my dreams overtake me. Instead of dreaming of green eyes and red hair, I dream about a lonely boy with an even lonelier tree tattoo.