XV. Dive
"So let me know the truth, before I dive right into you..."
Between 2012-2014 ang range ng time nung story, so bali 2013... Cheret!
Start
Flashback
After ST
"C'mon Vicey! Samahan mo na ako." Karylle was pouting, grabbing my left arm para mapatayo ako mula sa sofa.
"Saan ka ba kasi pupunta?" I asked her nang mapatayo na ako.
"Shopping! And I want to shop with you!" she really looks cute with that grin on her face. How can I resist someone like her?
"Ok fine! Ako na lang rin bahala sa mabibili mo." sagot ko tsaka nginitian siya, and saw her childish side again nung tumalon siya in joy dahil sa sinabi.
I'm really fine with this view. I can watch this a million times, if I just can.
Kasalukuyan na kaming nasa mall at naglilibot libot.
"Let me remind you again, Kurba. You can choose what ever you want." I reminded her with this small smile on my face.
"Pogi..."
Humarap siya sa akin, then took my hand. Oh how I love the way she calls me with that.
"I can manage naman. Tsaka, sale ngayon diba kaya makakamura-mura ako ngayon!" masaya niya sambit habang naglalakad kami na magkahawak kamay.
"Kuripot..." natatawa kong sagot.
"Hey! I'm just being thrifty." depensa niya.
Alam ko, hindi ako mananalo sa kaniya kaya hindi na ako nagsalita ulit, instead I smiled watching our hands.
"This or this?"
"Ano mas bagay sakin, Vice?"
"Oh my god! These are so cute!"
"Okay! Eto na!"
"I love these shoes!"
"Hey, Vicey! Parang bagay 'to sa'yo."
"Maybe, this shirt and pants!"
We've been to every shop of the mall hanggang sa napadpad na kami sa shop na pang-couple.
"Anong gagawin mo dito? Wala ka namang jowa." natatawa kong sambit habang papasok sa loob ng shop.
"Edi ikaw nalang! Ano ka ba!" she answered, and my heart started to pound fast again.
"Naku, Ana Karylle..." 'yon lang ang naisagot ko. That effect on me!
"Bakit ayaw mo ba?" she asked me while she was giggling.
"Well, maganda ka naman, maganda rin ako." I japed. Aaminin ko, kinikilig ako na na-awkwardan sa atmosphere namin ngayon.
"That's what I like about you!" tumatawa niyang sagot at muling itinuon ang pansin sa paghahanap ng couple stuffs.
Nakasunod lang ako sa kaniya, hanggang sa nag-stop siya sa mga T-shirts, habang ako nasa likod lang niya.
Couple shirt siya, na black. Yung para sa babae ay printed ng word na "MRS" habang yung sa panlalake ay printed naman nung word na "MR".
"What do you think about this couple shirt?" she asked while pointing dun sa couple shirt.
"It looks nice."
"Siguro mas nice yan pag suot natin!" sagot niya.
End of Flashback
Well, at the moment tinititigan ko yung picture namin wearing that "couple" shirt na binili namin a few months ago.
Ako yung nagsuot nung "MRS", siya yung nagsuot nung "MR". (A/N: I'm imagining this, and in my head they just really look cute.)
Close kami. Aaminin ko may gusto ako sa kaniya. She's nice with me. She's kind with me. I can feel that she cares about me. That she will always be with me.
I like her, I love her.
But one thing is missing...
Label.
Our label is missing. Ano nga ba talaga kami? Friends? No, we're not definitely. Lovers? Lalo namang hindi.
Nakakapanibago yung feeling ko ngayon. After realizing what's with us last night. As if naman merong "kami" sa amin. Tss.
Kinuha ko na yung phone ko mula sa side table ng kama ko, after it vibrated. I opened the message, without even bothering who texted me.
From: Kurba
Napangiti ako nung nabasa ko yung name nung sender.
Morning Pogi! Wakey wakey 🙌 You know there are so much kwento that I will make when we meet later sa Showtime! But for now, gumising ka na from your bed! Love ya 😘
Napasapo ako sa ulo ko, and gently na ibinalik yung cellphone ko sa side table. She's making things more complicated for me. She's saying such sweet sweet words that makes my heart beats so fast, then afterwards wala na.
Maybe she likes me too.
Geh. Lamon hopia, at inom pa ng kape, Vice.
Fudgeeee this feelings!
Pero imbes na tanungin ko siya kung ano man ang meron sa aming dalawa, ay pinabayaan ko nalang yung nangyayari. I mean, maybe after some time ay mapapa-amin din kaming dalawa. Who knows? Who knows what fate can do? It can be great, it can be worst. Still, I'm hoping for the best, only for the best.
Everyday kaming magkasama. Well, loveteam kasi kami diba?
One time napagkamalan pa nga kaming mag-jowa ng matatatanda. No! It was never once, it was for many times.
We've been on long walks on the beach. Om dates, coffee breaks. We kissed. Well, on-cam and off-cam, and others.
Nakakaloka diba? Yung parang kami, pero hindi. Masakit kaya.
But after that, parang medyo nabawasan yung pagiging sweet, at clingy niya sa akin. It made me sad. Nakakapanibago. Parang ang laki ng space.
"Pano ba kasi, Vice? Baka naman kaya ganun kasi gusto niya na ikaw muna yung umamin. Syempre babae si Karylle at ikaw naman talaga ang lalaki sa kanilang dalawa, kaya dapat ikaw talaga gumawa ng move para maiba na yung level nung like issues niyo na yan sa inyong dalawa. Malaya mo lang, gusto ka rin niya. Edi happy happy na!" sabi niy Vhong.
.
"Yun nga ang problema, hindi ko alam kung gusto niya ako or what, basta ang alam ko... gusto ko siya." sagot ko at tumungga ng alak.
"Ikaw din. Pag naunahan ka ng iba. Basta pinaalala ko na sa'yo ang dapat mong gawin."
From: Kurba
Sinagot ko na siya. Kami na.
Hindi ko na alam kung paano at anong nangyari, but nandito na ako ngayon sa tapat ng pinto ng condo ni Karylle, continuously knocking on her door. Baka nga masira ko na nga eh. I was so furious.
"Bakit ba kasi hindi ka makapaghint--- Vice?"
Wag salita ay agad na akong pumasok sa loob ng condo niya. Sa pagsara ng pinto ay ang pagsunggab ko naman sa labi niya. I kissed her, roughly.
She was pushing me, pero hindi ko siya pinakawalan, until I received a slap from her. Doon na ako napatigil.
"Anong nangyayari sayo?" she was crying. I don't know why but, her tears doesn't have an effect on me.
"Bakit mo siya sinagot?!" I shouted.
"Vice?"
"Bakit.mo.siya.sinagot?!" pag-ulit ko.
"Why are you asking me that kind of question?!" Karylle.
"Just answer my goddamn question!"
"Kasi mahal ko siya, Vice! Mahal ko siya!" she answered, shouting.
Those words pierced the whole me. My heart tears up. I can feel it, my tears started to fall down. Why am I asking that question anyway? Kami ba? I mean, are we even exes or what?
"Then why do you have to make me feel that you love me too?" pikit mata kong tanong sa kaniya. "Why do you have to be so clingy, always saying that you need me, and we're doing things lovers do?" dugtong ko at nilapitan na siya.
"Why do you have to make me feel that I love you, tapos ang ending you'll love someone else?” napaluhod na ako hawak ang kamay niya. I can't take this.
"Minahal naman kita, Vice eh. Hinihintay lang kita. Pero, Vice hindi sa lahat ng pagkakataon hihintayin kita."
"Pwede pa naman diba?"
"Vice..."
"Vice... Alam ko naman na baka pwede pa. Pero, Vice mahal ko siya at hindi ko na siya kayang iwan."
"Mahal din naman kita eh."
End
So another lame. Pero babawi ako. Happy 2k!