⚠️smutt warning!!
May 9
Three weeks.
Three weeks had passed since she'd received Hideo's letter, three weeks since her heart had been ripped out of her chest.
If she wanted cigarettes before, she needed them now, but unfortunately for her, she couldn't get her hands on them.
She missed the instant relief, she missed her home, her family.
She missed everyone, she missed the way Mary pinched her cheeks even though it hurt.
She missed the way Takara would grab her hand to reassure her that everything would be alright.
She missed the way Akise used to pull her hair when he got annoyed... but if she was being honest with herself she missed her dad the most.
She would try and call him whenever she mustered the energy to get out of bed.
Lucky for him, today she managed to roll out of bed, and she actually managed to get through the breakfast and lunch they'd brought her.
So instead we of sulking she spun around in Kyoya's chair, while she spoke to her dad using the landline phone.
"How's Akise?"
"Your brother's a mess,
as always...don't tell your mother,
but one of our employees
found cocaine in his room."
"Co–Cocaine?"
"Cocaine."
"I–I should talk with him soon."
"You should, I'm sure
he misses you."
"I miss him too,
I miss you all so much."
"I'm sure you don't,
married bliss and all,"
Hanae was about to reply when she heard the door swing open and in strolled, Kyoya. She sighed and said, "Hey dad, I'll call you back later." Before she hung up the phone.
Kyoya looked at her accusingly, his eyes landing on her legs. She wrinkled her nose and pulled down her shorts.
"Trying to get another letter from your boyfriend?"
"Go to hell," She sneered, as she spun the chair to face him. He loved bringing up all her mistakes every time he stepped into the room.
"You're mad at me? " He laughed but there was no humor in his tone.
"Why wouldn't I be?"
"You have no shame, do you?"
"Shame? You should be ashamed." She shot up to her feet and walked towards him, placing her hand on his chest. "You have me locked up like a dog."
His hard eyes looked her up and down before he spoke.
"It's what you deserve."
She felt every muscle in her body tense up.
"Excuse me,"
"You heard me, after all the crap you've done." He shouldered past her to dig through his desk.
"Everything I've done?" Her voice raised slightly. "What about everything you did, what about everything you keep doing?"
He dropped the file he'd picked up, and his sharp eyes met her own, "What are you talking about?"
"You know what I'm talking about." She pushed him away. "I'm talking about you paying for me, as if I were a piece of land, and that–that maid." She spat the sentence out like a curse.
"What maid?" Kyoya asked, but he knew.
Of course, he knew who she was talking about. She was talking about the woman he spent his entire day with, the woman who kept him company, the way his wife should.
When he snapped back into reality, he became painfully aware of how close she was to him, and how pretty she looked with her eyebrows scrunched up and her lips in a firm pout.
He also noticed how her pajamas were practically hiding nothing under her silk robe. She clearly didn't realize it though, she was too upset, she was too angry.
"You still have the audacity to ask?"
"I'm asking because I don't know." He drew his face closer to hers.
Her breath hitched, she hadn't been this close to him in over a month.
Flashes of all the nights they spent together cluttered her mind, but still only one thought prevailed.
Ren Asai, pinned down on her husband's bed, crying out his name.
She leaned her head up, se was so close she could see the look in his eye falter, "I'm talking about your blonde lap dog."
In an instant, he had her pinned down against his desk, his knee in between her thighs, and she felt heat flush throughout her body.
"Get off me!" She yelled her hands trying to shove him away, but his voice cut her off.
"You're jealous?" He leaned in closer to her flushed face. "You think you have a right to be jealous?"
"Jealous? I don't care what you do with that girl." Her voice was sharp, if only slightly trembling, and her hands had awkwardly landed on his arms. "You can do whatever you want with her,"
Kyoya knew the way her voice weakened very well, he could tell how she was fighting back every instinct in her body... but so was he.
"You can touch her." Her eyes landed on his lips.
His burning hand landed on her shaky thigh and she resisted the urge to gasp.
"You can kiss her."
He raised her chin up to look at him and she struggled to find her next words as she stared into his familiar dark eyes.
"You can fuck her, for all I care."
That was the last thing she said before his lips were against hers in a fury and she could only gasp as she felt his hand slide underneath her short's waistband.
She hated him.
Her hands undid his shirt.
She hated him.
She pulled the hem of his pants down.
She hated him.
But she cried out his name when she felt him slip inside her.
She was shaking–practically trembling–underneath his frame, they hadn't been together in months.
She'd almost forgotten the way he filled her up completely, the way his hands knew exactly how to make her fall apart.
She whimpered and pulled him down closer to her, even though her arousal was practically dripping down her thighs it was still a struggle to adjust around him. It was a tight fit even in the beginning, but now? After she hadn't felt his skilled hands against her in so long?
And he must've noticed too because he slowed down for a moment and he held her face.
He didn't have to ask if she was okay, because she knew what he was thinking and she brought his desperate lips down to her own once more, trying her best to engrave the feeling of his mouth moving perfectly against hers.
He pushed her thighs against her chest and she hissed in the unusual position, but her mind went blank when he slammed inside her even deeper than before.
And when his dark eyes looked into her own, she couldn't help but think that he looked at her with nothing but yearning, as if she were the thing he wanted the most in the world.
"I–I thought you hated me." She whispered breathlessly.
He didn't even answer, instead, he chose to pull away slightly and she -screamed when his fingers began stroking it as he pounded into her.
She was clinging onto him as if her life depended on it, and she started to see spots in her vision.
She was so close, it couldn't have been more than a couple of minutes and she was already on the verge of her orgasm.
And even through the blur of it all, no matter how good it felt to have him inside her, she couldn't help but think that he touched Ren this way too.
And she felt heat flush throughout her already-scorching body, she was angry.
Angry because that woman got to feel the same pleasure she was feeling right now, angry because that woman got to hear his voice grow weak as he neared his orgasm as well.
When his eyes finally met her own she took a sharp breath and said, "Who–Who feels better?"
He couldn't help but laugh weakly as he looked down at her, at his wife.
Did she really think Ren Asai could compare to her?
In a flash his mouth landed on her shoulder and he bit down hard, but she was so fucked out she couldn't acknowledge the feeling of his teeth sinking into her flesh.
"Hanae," He took a shaky breath, and she looked up at him with hazy eyes, that was enough for him to push her down against the desk and slip in between her legs again.
Black spots began to blur her eyesight, it was too much, the feeling of him thrusting inside her, the sudden pain coming from her shoulder.
She was coming undone and all she could do was babble his name over and over again, until her orgasm hit her like a wave crashing against the shore. He came only seconds after her, filling her to the brim, before capturing her lips one last time.
When he pulled away her hands kept him in place, so that their foreheads were touching.
Maybe Kyoya didn't love her anymore, maybe that ship had sailed for them... but he still wanted her.
He wanted her.
She swallowed her nerves and began.
"We can't keep living like this," She whispered, her lips so close to his own that he could hardly hold back his urge to kiss her again, but it was her who closed the gap this time, and there wasn't a moment of hesitation on his part as he pushed her back down against the surface.
When he finally pulled away, she tugged him back, and held his flushed face against her own.
"I'm sorry... " She whispered, her eyes turning glassy. "I'm so sorry I tried to leave you."
He wanted to push her away, and refuse her apology, but when he saw the pleading look in her eyes, he completely crumbled against her body.
How could one person have such a hold over him? Even after what she'd done, he still loved her.
Was that even sane, to want someone as badly as he wanted her?
He took a deep breath and looked at her once more, and the guilt he'd had pent up for weeks, began to cloud his thoughts for the thousandth time that month.
"I never meant to buy you Hanae, but when I saw you with Kasanoda that night, I could see you slipping away... I panicked."
She wrapped her arms around him and dug her face in the crook of his neck.
She missed him, more than she hated him.
author's note: does this count as hate sex? 😩 sorry i've never written a smutt like this, but i'm tired and trynna get through these chapters asap