Some things...are just to be accepted than repelled. And some things are bigger than us than to simply understand from their exterior.
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"Where are you now?
Was it all in my fantasy?
Where are you now?
Were you only imaginary?"
-Faded, Alan Walker
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I wake up drenched from my sweat, my bones feeling oddly cold and my skin hot and bothered over them.
My mind rings with memories, ones that almost tethered away. I breathe in the calm air at a fast pace, looking around and noticing it's almost dawn as it wasn't as dark outside.
"Maybe it's too soon."
"You're too young, and you already have a family."
"You'll never make it work."
"They never last, youthful decisions."
"Well there you have it! She's g-gone now!" I yelled into the silence, my voice cracking as I feel the familiar stinging tears in my eyes.
I remember. Maybe not everything, but I remember that day three years ago.
And I really wish I hadn't.
*
"Baby, this is what you came for! Lighting strikes ever-"
Edward ceases all movement once he sees me staring at him unamused, his cheeks flushing deep red as he quickly pulls out his headphones and pauses the song.
God, he's such a teenager.
"D-dad..." he drags in embarrassment and scratches his head. "You needed something?"
"Yes, where is my phone?" I raise my brow.
He raises his own brows in confusion, and I can see right through the bull. "What? Isn't it with you?"
I stare at him for at least two long minutes with a deadpan expression.
He huffs and sighs loudly. "Are you sure?"
I shrug. "I just really need it. I have to get back to work, you know."
He's already walking through the mess in his room to his dresser and looks through one of the drawers. He walks over and hands it to me.
I try taking it, but his grip is still tight on it. "Edward..." I let out an exasperated sigh.
He let's go, and I shove it in my pocket as I step away from his doorway and head towards the stairs. I hear him close his door, and I reach the living room and finally turn on my phone as I sit on the couch.
I'll leave everything for later...I need to call Mick for now.
I'm bombarded with notifications, as I expected, and I ignored them as I went to my contacts and called Mick. This will be a long talk.
"Harry! About time man, are you good now?"
I sigh inaudibly. "Yeah, I'm alright. How is it going? "
"Nothing much since you've been out of it...oh shit, was I allowed to say that?"
I force a laugh and roll my eyes. "It's fine, so what happened the past seven months?"
He fills me in on how there had been one artist that signed with the label I'm with but she wasn't good enough, and that what they refused on right before I had the accident lead them to bad sales and media so they're gonna do it but apparently we have to have a meeting first to talk about the arrangements and stuff.
Honestly, my head hurts from all the paper work I'm doing in the future. I really should consider hiring an assistant.
"But aside from all that load, you could start coming back to the studio if you're ready while I set a meeting next month. We have a lot of things to do for your big come back."
"I'm sure. Well, thanks mate. I'll see you soon."
"Bye Styles, welcome back."
"Thanks."
I stare at the phone after I hang up. I feel like I am so unprepared for grabbing a pen and belting out rhyming words...but at the same time I have so any ideas already. And not very bright, joyful, filled with light ones.
I don't know for how long I was just sitting there, staring at the wall blankly, when the doorbell rang. I let out a short breath as I got up and straightened my back, hearing a crack, and walked to the hallway and heard the doorbell ringing again, until I reached it seconds later.
I find a girl, but this time she looks older than...I think her name was Liza?
Yeah...
Her extremely flashy white-ish dyed hair was hard not to stare at and I'm pretty sure she's giving me a look behind her sunglasses.
I cleared my throat.
"Hello, here for Edward?" I ask right away.
She purses her lips. "Yup. Can you call him over? We gotta go."
"Okay..." I leave the door open as I walk away to the stairs.
This boy is about to have more girls knocking on his door than I did at his age. Damn.
I open the door to his room, seeing him just pulling a shirt on and grabbing his phone from his dresser. "So you know?"
He looks at me and walks over. "Uh yeah, she's downstairs?"
I raise a brow and step out the way as he walks out. " and by she you mean..."
"Dela."
"Mhmm." I raise both my brows even though I'm just walking behind him.
"She's...my tutor. She promised she'll take me to a festival she spoke about with her boyfriend if I got a B in maths."
"Oh."
Since when did he get a tutor?
I scratch the back of my neck as he heads to the front door. "Well, be careful!" I call behind him before he leaves.
"I will, bye!" And the door closes.
I'll just go catch up on what I've been doing seven months ago.
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13/12/2002
Taylor had just turned eighteen, and conveniently Maria shooed the kids out their own apartment and practically forced them to go have fun while she took care of Edward.
Harry pretended like he had nothing to do behind that as he wondered out loud to his girlfriend where could they go, his hand holding hers while the other is in his pants' pocket.
He was smirking, but Taylor wasn't watching the look he had.
"We could just go have dinner, it's like nine right now." She suggested.
Harry made a look, and turned to her while shaking his head.
"No?"
"I have something better in mind." He walked faster on the sidewalk toward the curb.
"Of course you do," she muttered while he hailed a cab and looked at her to send her a wink, indicating he heard her.
The cab pulled over near them, and they got in, immediately feeling the heat contrasting the cold of the winter outside in New York.
Taylor didn't question him as he told the driver where to go, something she didn't quite catch, and they made small talk with him as he recognised them from a few headlines and pictures on newspapers and magazines. He asked for their autographs when they reached their destination, and they happily signed on a magazine he had on the passenger seat. Harry paid him and took his number, telling him he'd call him when they'll need a ride home.
The driver was more than happy to agree on driving them again, they were one of the few nice ones in the busy streets of New York.
As soon as the couple stepped out on the sidewalk, Harry had dragged Taylor into the club before she could take a look at its name. The bouncer looked at them, taking his attention momentarily off the line waiting to get in. Harry lifted his ID, even though he's twenty, he managed to get them in calmly while girls in the line suddenly screamed his name. Taylor heard the guard yelling at them as they went inside, and she felt guilty for laughing but it always amused her when girls went nuts over her boyfriend.
"Where are we?" She asked over the upbeat music.
"Welcome to Club Cache!"
Harry looks over to check over on his girlfriend, showing her how he's actually so excited.
Hell, she thought, if he's happy, then I should be too.
They reached the bar and Harry waved over a bartender before looking at Taylor and taking off his jacket, "Give me your coat." He helped her take it off and smiled when he noticed she'd worn the black dress. "Order us drinks while I put these somewhere."
She nodded and he hurried away somewhere while she turned to where the lady is already placing two glasses in front of her. "Four shots of whiskey, please."
The lady raised a brow but didn't say anything as she smiled and took out two more glasses and grabbed an evidently cold bottle and filled them. She took out a small plate with sliced lemons beside the shots.
"Anything else?" She asked.
Taylor shook her head and looked to check where Harry is, a minute feeling like five already. But she couldn't help but hear someone murmuring her name. She glanced at where the bartender is a few feet away talking with her co-worker.
"¿No es esa Taylor Swift?"
She ignored them and turned to look for Harry again.
"Hey!"
She jumped when she felt a pair of arms around her middle. Harry laughed behind her as she glanced at him and elbowed him. "That wasn't funny," she mumbled.
Harry sat beside her and playfully rolled his eyes. He looked at the shots in front of them and smirked broadly. "Well, someone is not wasting time." He chuckled and handed her one while he held one for himself.
"Shush, let me live." She took a slice of a lemon in her other hand.
"How is eighteen feeling so far?"
"Meh." She shrugged and they clinked their glasses together and the bottoms were up...as in the glasses.
Taylor cringed right away and placed the lemon in her mouth, Harry doing the same except he's laughing at her expression. She gave him a look before taking the second shot, and he followed suit. They stared at each other challengingly before Harry broke the stare and drank the burning liquid, squeezing the same lemon in his mouth right after and placing both things on the table and standing to his feet.
"Taylor?"
She put down the glass with the lemon slice in it. "Hmm?" She swallowed with another sour expression making her squeeze her eyes and shake her head before focusing on Harry again.
"Remember the time we were messing around trying to do that dance from that movie-"
"Yeah, and we barely did any of it right." Taylor laughed, slowly shaking her head.
"Well, personally I think we did good. And it's time we reinact it." He held out his hand.
She stared at him with a grin, amused at the fact he thought they can pull all that routine off. Plus, she was feeling a bit tipsy already so might as well. "We'll fail so bad." She giggled as he pulled her to him.
He leaned down and pushed back her straightened hair. "Just feel the music, eh?" He kissed her cheek and slipped his arm around her waist.
Taylor laughed and hit his chest as they walked to the dance floor between the semi-crowd. "So damn cheesy," she said as Harry held back a smile and stopped at a fairly less crowded part of the dance floor and tugged her against his body.
"Just feel the music, bonita."
Taylor bit her lip as Harry's left hand had trailed down her back to rest above the curve between her bum and spine. She hears the melody of the music first, looking up at Harry as she has her right hand on his shoulder and left one held by his.
The beat meets their bones, and they let it lead them through the floor. It wasn't an exact replica to the movie's, but they went by the way Katey and Javier formed their dance.
They felt the music.
It was like an old song reminisced as they complimented each other's moves, feeling each other's increasing temperature with their skin always meeting and fastening heart beats.
Harry's hands were everywhere, in all the right and wrong places. Literal dirty dancing as they grinded against each other in the most sensual way in the shadows, covering them from any prying eyes along with the flickering red and blue lights helping keeping them in their own private world.
Their lips attached as Taylor's back was pressed against Harry's front while he held her close with his hands tightly on her hips. They could never have enough of tasting one another in the most intimate way; it was a passionate kiss that would even make a person staring at them look away from the flustering feelings it emits, with Taylor's fingers in his hair and her other hand on one of Harry's that are on her waist.
Harry turned her around, his hips meeting hers in a slow motion as he moved her waist with him. His hands tugged her down, holding her with one arm as Taylor had her right hand on his neck while her eyes were closed and head thrown back. Harry's fingertips trailed down her chest, down the cut of the dress in her cleavage, feeling her heart beating and her breathing heavy, toward her torso then held her thigh and pulled Taylor upright as he lead her leg to rest on the back of his own.
Their gazes met at that moment, someone would think they were drunk already, but the only thing they were drunk from was each other. A passion like theirs, that vehement love they had, no one could ever find that easily. What they had was rare, no one thought it was that serious, Harry was twenty and Taylor just turned eighteen after all. But they believed in what the world didn't, and it was beautiful.
Sometimes a person doesn't have to be told that they're loved by their lover, because they'd see it in their eyes and the way they act around them. Little does the world know that that is what matters the most when you want someone to know you love them.
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E D W A R D
I walked in the house after waving Dela off, hearing their car driving loudly down the street in the night. I didn't mean to stay late, I lost track of time. I hope Dad didn't do something reckless...
Nah, he wouldn't.
I shrug and jog upstairs, passing by his bedroom and seeing the door open wide and the room empty. I turn and walk across the hall to his office, knocking at the ajar door and push it open lightly. I spot him at his desk, his head lying on his arms and covering his face with papers and journals scattered on it. The desk light was the only source of light in the room, and I walk in carefully.
I want nothing more than to throw myself in my bed and sleep after the exhausting day.
But I'm responsible, and only doing what Mom would do. I poke Dad's back, calling him quietly.
Yeah man, he definitely heard you.
I refrain myself from grumbling to my own self and speak up more clearly. "Dad, get up." I shake him by his shoulders lightly.
He lifts his head slightly, his eyes still droopy as he frowned and squinted at me. "Hey..."
He sounds like he's been sleeping for a while now. Well, my bad for interrupting it. He feels hot though, even through his clothes.
"It's late, go sleep on your bed." I tell him softly.
"When have you returned?" He asked groggily as he sat up and rubbed his face.
"A while ago," I lie. "I thought you were out until I checked the house." I chuckle awkwardly and scratch the back of my neck.
"Right." He stands up and flips the switch of the lamp.
I watch him as he mumbles a goodnight when we're in the hallway and trudge to his bedroom sleepily. As much as I hate it, I feel like he's slowly being sucked into that hole he cramped himself in. But I guess the only difference right now is that he isn't shutting me out completely. I like to think he's remembering the good things, but I know that's too good to be true.
I unlock my phone and check what I have since I didn't since the afternoon. What I didn't expect though, was a text.
And not just from anyone.
It's from Liza.
I'm not blushing.
Sure you aren't, buddy.
I roll my eyes at myself and open it, letting myself fall back on my bed.
This is ridiculous, how dare you make me read a novel that murders the MAIN CHARACTER? ARE YOU SERIOUS EDDIE?!!!
I laugh and turn on my stomach. I got her to read Me Before You. I watched the movie, I wouldn't admit it to anyone but I did...tear up a bit. Then I thought she'd like that kind of plot so I got the book and dared her to read it in a week.
I send her back a test, telling her I'll stop by tomorrow to hear all about it. I then remember the journal dad had left on his desk, and my feet carry out the room before I have more thoughts into this.
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