02/01/2017
She comforted me today.
I didn't go to work. I skipped practice even though the tryouts for the SEA games was on the day after tomorrow. I didn't even wanna get up from the bed. I didn't wanna eat. I didn't wanna think. Not after I saw LA's post.
It was a picture of him and Den with Den hugging him from behind with her arms around his neck. Den was kissing LA's cheek.
That was the probably most clingy picture of the two of them that I've ever seen. No matter how clingy Den was, most of her pictures with LA were just them being close to each other or her holding his arms. Nothing as physical as a kiss. Afterall, her relationship with LA was a cover up. I'm the real girlfriend.
Was.
Fuck. I was her girlfriend. Not anymore.
The caption of the photo made sure of that: 'Something right and real.'
It hasn't even been 10 days since Den and I broke up but she was already being happy with someone else. The pain I was feeling was 1000 times greater than loosing against La Salle last season. It was the most painful feeling I have ever experienced.
My friends were concerned. They've been texting and calling me so I turned off my phone. I didn't want their pity. I didn't want their company. I didn't want anyone except Den.
But Den was no longer mine.
I cried. I punched the pillows, the bed. I threw books on my wall. But none of those made me feel better. Not the slightest.
It was late afternoon already when someone rang my doorbell. I ignored it. But the person was persistent, he/she kept ringing the doorbell until it was my ears that rang. So I stood up from my bed to turn away whoever it was on my door.
I callously opened the door, ready to bitch out.
But I was unprepared to see Mika wearing a gray v-neck shirt, white shorts, and sneakers, standing on my doorstep with knitted brows and looks that could kill.
"Bakit ang tagal mong buksan?" she snapped before barging in.
My jaw dropped in annoyance.
"Bahay mo?!" I asked angrily when I recovered before slamming the door. "Anong ginagawa mo dito?!"
Mika rolled her eyes before putting the bags of Jollibee on my dining table.
"Yayayain sana kita manuod ng sine pero di kita macontact kaya pinuntahan na lang kita," she said simply. "And you look like shit."
I suddenly became conscious of my appearance. I was sure I looked like hell with my messy hair in my tank top and boxer shorts. I hid my embarrassment behind anger. She wasn't even supposed to be here. I din't want her to be here.
"How did you even know where I live? And I don't want company right now," I hissed. "And even if you say you're gonna post that damned audio recording then so be it! Baka 'yan pa ang maging dahilan para balikan niya ako," I said bitterly towards the end.
Not true. Den would hate me, if she didn't yet. I didn't want to ruin Den's image. But at the same time, I wasn't in the mood for Mika's blackmailing scheme.
"Ahh," I was surprised to see Mika holding a spoonful of sundae in front of me, urging me to open my mouth. So I did. I repeat, I was surprised.
I frowned as I swallowed the ice cream.
"Para mabawasan naman ka-bitter-an mo," she said with a teasing smile.
The woman really was a nut job who couldn't take a hint that I didn't want her in my unit and was shameless as fuck doing basically anything she wanted to do.
I sighed. I was never gonna win against her. Not even if I was kind, not when I'm angry, not with anything. You can't reason with lunatics.
I went and plopped down on a barstool and rubbed my temples.
"What do I have to do to make you leave?" I said exasperatedly. "I'm not feeling well. I don't want company."
"Alam ko," she said before sitting beside me, bringing the ice cream with her and eating it. "Nakita ko 'yung post. Alam kong you don't want company. But you need one. So I'm here."
I looked at her blankly. She met my gaze.
"I'm going to be honest with you. I like your company. You probably don't feel the same way pero alam kong napapatawa naman kita minsan. Sabi nga nila, laughter is the best medicine."
She gave me a sweet smile before eating another spoonful of ice cream. I shook my head. I appreaciate her concern but I just didn't get her.
"Kumain ka na ba?" she asked.
I shook my head. I wasn't feeling hungry.
"Thought so. Tara, kain tayo," she stood up and pulled me with her.
At the sight of food, my stomach grumbled. I guess I was hungry. I just wasn't feeling it.
She put a lot of food in front of me and urged me to eat. She, on the other hand, only ate fries and ice cream.
She was probably using some of her witch magic on me because I was so sure I wanted her to leave me alone and yet, I ended up eating silently the food she brought me and being thankful for her efforts. I internally smiled in amazement and confusion at how she was doing that.
As I was eating my dessert, ice cream, of course, and she was already finished, she stared at me. When I raised my brows at her, she just shook her head and roamed her eyes around my unit. But I kept catching her glance every time I was about to eat the ice cream.
I smiled. She wanted more ice cream, I was sure. But she was trying to pretend that she didn't. Kinda cute.
"Here," I said as I offered a spoonful of ice cream.
I swear I saw her eyes sparkle as she opened her mouth and took the spoon in her mouth. I chuckled as she grinned at me.
When I took another bite only did I realize that I willingly shared my spoon with her. But more shockingly, I didn't find it repulsive. The hell?
I offered her the rest of my ice cream which she took eagerly when that realization hit me.
"Babe, no offense, pero ligo ka muna. Ang baho mo na, eh," she said once we were done eating.
I frowned and sniffed myself. I didn't smell bad.
She laughed. "Cute. Inamoy mo nga sarili mo."
I glared at her. She kept laughing.
"Sige na, ligo ka na. Iligpit ko na 'to tapos nood tayo movie after?'
"Ayoko. If you want to stay, eh di magtiis ka kung nababahuan ka sakin," I snapped.
"Okay," she smirked.
I helped her clean up. At the very least, I washed my face and fixed my hair afterwards before inviting her to the bedroom to watch a movie on my computer. I wanna lie down so I wanted to watch on the bed.
She was sporting a mischievous look as we were about to enter my bedroom.
"Ang bilis mo naman. Bedroom agad?" she said teasingly.
I widened my eyes as I got her meaning. I flushed.
"Kapal mo, ah!" I replied.
God! As if I would bed someone like her!
Yes, you would.
NO, I won't! Shut up, scumbag brain!
"Ang ibig ko lang naman sabihin, kakakain lang natin tapos hihiga agad! Hindi daw maganda 'yun sa katawan," she smirked. "Makapal na agad? Ano bang iniisip mo? Pinagnanasaan mo siguro ako."
"What?! No!"
She laughed. "Ang defensive mo! Ayiiiie. Crush mo ako, 'no?"
That's when I got my composure back. I rolled my eyes.
"Sorry, di kita type." I stuck my tongue at her before plopping down on my bed.
"Ang type mo ba 'yung mas maliit sayo?"
I froze.
Den. Yes, I loved the fact that Den was shorter than me. It made us fit together perfectly.
The shift in my mood must have showed because Mika hastily added, "Ako rin kasi, eh. Gusto ko 'yung mas maliit sakin."
She winked.
I shook my head, deciding to go along with her.
"Liar. Alam ko gusto mo mas matangkad sa'yo."
"Paano mo alam? Stalker kita 'no?"
I moved towards the left side of the bed to give her some space to sit down on.
"Kapal talaga," I replied. "Tall girls like taller guys than them."
"Yep. But tall girls like shorter girls than them."
She winked again and I flushed.
"You wouldn't know. You're not even gay."
"I'd go gay for you."
She was staring intensely and I blushed again after hearing that same statement from her again. She laughed.
"Ang cute mo!"
I turned my head and hid my face on my pillow. Then it hit me that I am at my own place, my bedroom, yet, I'm still the one feeling embarrassed. Unacceptable!
That's where I got my resolve. I sat up and looked at her determinedly.
"You're on. Two can play at this game, Mika Reyes."
I didn't even know what game I was talking about. Maybe it was a game of making each other feel uncomfortable or embarrassed because seriously, that's what it felt like we've been doing whenever we were in a playful mood.
She looked at me challengingly.
I then pushed her down the bed gently and put my hands beside her, trapping her.
I saw the look of surprise in her eyes. A tinge of red also formed on her cheeks.
"Babe," I said huskily. And suddenly, she was red as a tomato. I smirked. "Make yourself comfortable."
I gave her a dimpled smile before reaching for the my computer on the bedside table on her side. Then I moved back to my side and put the computer on my stomach and turned it on.
Mika was still unmoving.
Ha! Finally! I got her back! Apparently, I also had some kind of effect on her!
"Shit." I turned to her when I heard her whisper. She had one hand on her chest. "You made my heart race, Ly."
And my heart started racing too at that honest confession. She even called me Ly so seriously. It was a pleasant feeling.
But for a split second, she looked uncomfortable. It was easily replaced by her playful demeanor.
"The match has just begun. Babawi ako, Babe."
She sat up and leaned towards me, I tried to lean back but I couldn't fall deeper into the bed. I was surprised when she grabbed my left arm and put it around her before leaning on me. She lowered herself down so that her head was lying on my underarm.
She was too close. I felt blood rushing to my face.
"Paano mo nga pala nalaman kung saan ako nakatira?" I asked, trying to keep my mind off our situation and looked for a movie we could watch.
"Kay Kim. Sabi ko may kailangan akong isauli sayo na hiniram ko noong naglunch tayo sa labas minsan."
I hummed in response. I didn't trust my voice to make a sound.
"Come on, Babe, nood na tayo. What do you want to watch?"
She laid her left arm on my stomach as I scrolled through the movies that I had.
Too close. I found it hard to breathe.
She must be on some kind of drugs because she even leaned up and sniffed my neck. I had goosebumps.
"By the way, joke lang 'yung mabaho ka. Ang bango mo nga, eh. Anong body wash mo?"
I wasn't sure if she was genuinely curious and I didn't care. I couldn't even think. She was too close! But I didn't move away. I stood my ground. My turf, remember? But I couldn't retort either.
"Anong gusto mong panoorin?" I asked to move away from the topic of body wash or anything related to taking baths because that image was about to pop in my head again. It was a conscious effort to push it to the back of my mind.
She laughed. She knew she was winning. But I wasn't giving up. I was the one who even said the game is on.
"Here, ikaw na pumili."
I took her left hand on my stomach and put it on the mousepad.
Then with my left hand that was around her, I started caressing her arm. She froze. I snickered.
She kept quiet as she chose a movie.
"Ang dami mo namang movies," she said offhandedly.
I shrugged.
With so many choices to discuss, our game was forgotten. But she kept her hand on my stomach and I kept caressing her arm or laid it there once the movie started without thought. We didn't even notice it.
We chose a funny movie and we laughed together.
We fell asleep in the middle of the second movie.
I noticed it though when I woke up in the middle of the night with her safely tucked in my arm. My heart beat fast and I couldn't calm it down as I realized that I was in bed with Mika Reyes.
I purposely shared my private space with her and I didn't mind at all even in retrospect. I smiled as I remembered how she somehow made me feel better. I knew I didn't want company earlier but apparently, she was the company I needed.
But as I remembered our interaction, I start to wonder if what we were doing was considered flirting?
Were we flirting? She was teasing. I teased back. But it was not the kind of teasing shared between normal friends. Were we even friends? Yes, I think we were. But I do know I've never acted that way towards any of my other friends nor have I felt what I felt towards her towards any of my friends when I was being playful with them.
More so, the guilt was killing me. How could I acted that way towards another woman when it hasn't even been 10 days since Den left me? How could I be sleeping with another woman in my arms when I'm still trying to get Den back? I felt crappy. I felt like I was cheating on Den even though I wasn't.
But when I looked at Mika's sleeping face, the sight made me want to say, "Screw it. I'm not doing anything wrong."
Mika was helping me. The crazy woman was keeping me sane. From the deepest pit of hurt and depression, she brought me back and took some of the pain away. She made me happy. She made me laugh. Why do I have to feel bad about that? Why do I have to feel guilty?
I battled with my own thoughts until my head hurt. Until I didn't want to think anymore. So I stopped thinking and kept on feeling. I felt comfortable with Mika.
I'll continue hating myself and feeling guilty tomorrow. But for now, I decided to sleep soundly so I did.
END OF CHAPTER
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Author's notes: Sooooooo baka slower UD pa tayo from here on out, guys. Naadik ako sa mobile legends plus may work pa. No time to write. Btw, since hindi ako nagonline since new year, natawa ako habang nagchecheck ng ganap ng KiefLy. Nakikisama sila mga beh. After kong magpublish ng The Truth, yung 'I eight you' fiasco, wala na silang ganap. Hahahaha. Kahit new year post, wala. Anuna.
Will read all your comments and messages soon. Thank you! Thank you!
Oo na, alam kong sabog. Lalo na towards the end. Pero comments lang mga beh, happy na ako. Hahaha. Thank youuuuu!
Titanic, theheftycollector! Hahahaha. Wala ng picture because I trust you. Nuuuuuuks.
Buhay na si Baezae! Hahahaha. UD na po idol!