My eyes are swollen from crying so much and I keep slipping in and out of sleep but I welcome sleep, it's the only time I can just not think at all. Thinking just makes everything worse, the pain of what I used to be, what I used to have is to much to deal with.
My mom was the only person I had and now she's gone and there's no one left, nothing left, it seems that Mr.Edwards continues to be a black hole that devours everything that I care about, and everything that could even be close to showing hope.
There's no hope left and hope is the drive of nearly every human. The hope of getting into that college you dream of, the hope of love, the hope of having a family, the hope of having a better life but when a persons life becomes hopeless their life becomes nothing and soon that person becomes nothing, just a black void of what it used to be.
If we counted how many black voids there are in the world would there be enough light to draw them out? I personally don't believe that even the sun it self could draw out the darkness that consumes this earth.
I hear a loud scream of terror but I don't move, it's not like I could if I wanted to.
" Lacey! "
I hear Whiney scream.
" Lacey wake up! "
I move my head to look at the door, what's going on behind that door. I hear footsteps and then Whitney comes in, she's crying.
Whitney is crying.
The girl who has never showed any guilt or sorrow is crying.
The girl who's heart is said to be made of steel.
" She's dead. "
Whitney sobs and throws herself into my arms, I lay here shocked. Yeah she's coming to me because I'm the only one here but this is still just confusing. She sits up and looks at me, still sobbing.
" She-She killed herself. "
She sobs harder.
" And it's all my fault, if I didn't help that ass we wouldn't be here, she wouldn't be here and she wouldn't be dead. "
I can barely understand what she's saying now because she's crying so hard. I just watch amazed as the tears flow down her face, I look in her eyes and I see one emotion, unlike all the other times her eyes only hold one emotion
Guilt.
There's no hatred, no jealousy, just guilt.