Posted on January 22, 2017 | Edited on April 16th, 2018
Dedicated to nandrajogdivya. Thank you dear for all your support! :*
| . . . C H AP T E R . . . 1.12 . 1 : J A I L - C E L L - C O N F E S S I O N S . . . |
I repeated when the officer had locked us in a cell holding. "It was just a brownie."
All he had to do was say one word for me to know he was starting to get mad. "Khushi."
No surprise there. He'd been like that for the past two hours.
"We get atleast one phone call, right?"
He inhaled deeply as if to calm himself before pointing out, "Sweet pea, do you not hear the rain and thunders outside? It's storming outside. Which phone line do you think is going to be working right now for us to get a phone call?"
I exclaimed - thanks to my headache. "Well do something! We can't stay stuck in jail!"
"We are stuck in jail until the storm clears, which by the sound of it, doesn't look like it will be any time soon. So, please. Stop asking so many questions and sit down."
Though one of our hands cuffed, it hadn't stopped me from pacing back and forth. I'd only managed to pull his hand from one side to the other each time. He hadn't complained thus far, but he lost his patience then. "But..."
He stood abruptly just as I turned to walk the other direction. His body blocked my path and I stumbled back a step. "I swear, Khushi, if you don't sit down right now, I will make you."
I gulped at what he threatened and let myself drop on the chair at once.
Outside the cell, the officer keeping an eye on us chucked. "Should have done that two hours ago."
Great. Now I had managed to irritate him too and he was speaking to Arnav as if they were old buddies and sympathizing with him. I wanted to scowl at him but some rational part of me stopped me.
I can only manage to stay silent for roughly five minutes before I try to get Arnav's attention. "Psht."
He closed his eyes to control his anger, turned to me, and reopened them. "What now?"
His black eyes bore into mine and I couldn't read them to tell what was on his mind. I asked in a small voice. "Can they atleast uncuff us? I mean, we're already locked up in a cell. What are we going to do?"
He shook his head, deeming my question not worthy of a verbal answer. I hated this silent treatment from him. I was usually the one giving them. I hated being at the receiving end.
I let my head rest on the wall behind me and pulled my feet up to my chest. "I'm sorry." Given my eyes were open, I noticed when he turned his head just a bit to let me know he had heard me. "I don't understand what happened but obviously it's my fault if you are mad at me."
He didn't answer for a minute. Then, he too sat back and asked in a calm tone, "Where did you find them?"
"What, brownies?" He blinked in answer and I replied, "They were in the desk in the room."
"And you didn't think it was a weird place to keep brownies?"
"Well, yeah, but..."
He sighed and expressed his thoughts, "And she still decides its okay to eat them."
I took offense. "Hey!" Not only was it rude to talk about someone who was present in third person, I also did not understand his statement. My head was pounding with this headache.
I was going to continue to defend myself when it thundered outside and I winced at the sound. For the longest seconds, I kept my eyes shut. I hated storms. I had nothing against them at first until a couple years ago...
That night had been a stormy night too.
"Hey..." I dared to open my eyes at his soft whisper. Gentle. In one single word, I could still hear his concern. He added when I turned to look at him, "Do you still have that headache?"
I managed a small smile as I informed, "It's going to stay until the storm stops."
He doesn't seem to get the connection. I don't explain.
He suggested, thinking it would help, "How about you try going to sleep?"
My laugh was humorless, "Sleep is the last thing on my mind, Raizada."
It was not so easy to sleep when my hand was tied to him forcing us to sit right next to each other with barely a breadth of space between us. To make matters worse, there was the headache, an empty stomach, and the storm causing me to fight every second to not slip back to that wretched night.
Let's not forget we were in a jail cell. My parents are going to have a field day when they hear about this.
He asked, "Try."
Ofcourse, it doesn't happen.
Half hour later, I find myself asking. "Will you distract me?"
He opened his eyes to look at me. I am sure my face was very pale right now, exhausted. "What's wrong?"
I answered while shaking my head and speaking in bare words unable to form a sentence, "The storm... I... headache... please."
I dropped my head on my knees tightly shutting my eyes and inhaled sharply so stop my heart from beating twice its pace.
I felt him shift due to the tug on my wrist. "How about a game?"
We started naming fruits in order of alphabets. Not the smartest idea since it made both of us hungry and neither was it the brightest game out there but it did do the trick of keeping my mind off the storm.
"Nestle."
He laughed, "That's a brand name, sweet pea. Not a fruit."
I exclaimed in defense, "I can't think of a fruit that starts with N!"
He answered instantly, "Naartjie."
"What? That's not a fruit." I argued with a laugh.
"So is. It's the scientific name for citrus."
"Nerd." Why does he even know this? Where did he learn this?
He commented, "You're just horrible at this game." He was right. More than half the times when it was my turn, I had said the stupidest things.
"Whatever. You picked a silly game. There aren't even that many fruits."
"Just because they aren't commonly known doesn't not make them fruits."
"You shouldn't use double negatives."
Were we making sense? No. We were just passing time, saying whatever came to mind.
The officer, whose name we'd learned was Paul, interrupted our banter, "Are you two always like this?"
I answered, "In the week of knowing him, pretty much."
Paul had been giving reactions every now and then for the past half hour we had been playing this game and we had gotten used to it. I can't blame him for taking interest in our conversation. Stuck in the station with the storm and lights out, there wasn't much for any of us to do. A few times, he'd even joined in the game lending me his hand and even then, the two of us were losing against Arnav.
He seemed surprised, "You two know each other for just a week?"
I answered in a yes while Arnav said the opposite.
"Which is it?"
This time, Arnav beat me, "I know her since fall semester started as she is friends with my cousin and lives in the apartment I own."
I objected, "It's not your apartment." He raised his brow and I wasn't too sure anymore. "Is it?"
He chuckled, "Why do you think I have a spare key?"
I shrugged, "I don't know. I thought Kripa gave you one?"
He shook his head, "No. It's mine. I used to live there before you and Ridzzi moved in. I only allowed it because Kripa said she wanted to live with females and didn't want to put up with me."
I scoffed, "Didn't stop you from still staying there most of your free time."
"No, it didn't." He admitted without any shame.
I asked just as a yawn caught up with me, "Isn't she going to be worried?"
We were gone long enough and they had surely woken up by now. No one could sleep through this storm.
"Sleep, sweet pea."
"You know what's crazy?"
He sighed for I kept on defying, "No. What?"
I confessed through a smile, "I don't think I hate you anymore."
He scoffed, "Oh, gee. Thanks. I feel like my life's goal has been fulfilled."
Without a second thought, I swatted his arm. "No need for sarcasm, mister."
He stared at me in surprise for I willingly touched him but I was too lost in my thoughts to notice.
I hooked my arm through his and continued as I sat back comfortably, "You know, I never said it before but thank you. I don't doubt that in the coming days, I am going to hate you again for what you'll make me do but in a way, it is still helping so I need to say it, you know? So, yeah. Thanks again."
He mumbled under his breath but because I was sitting next to him, I heard it. "You are so going to regret this when you sober up."
I pointed out instead of retaliating, "I'm not drunk that I need to sober up."
He simply shook his head. With the headache getting the best of me, I closed my eyes and let my head drop on his shoulder, safely calling on to sleep and take away all the tension.
Being in a jail cell should be the last idea of comfort for anyone, and yet, next to him - strangely - I did feel safe and perhaps... perhaps, most comfortable. But, I wouldn't admit that just yet to anyone. Given everything I had been through, I should not be comfortable sitting so closely to him. Touching him.
The last thing I hear is his whisper, "Sweet dreams."
It's like he knows of my nightmares and how much I desperately need some sweet dreams to counterbalance them and have a peaceful night of sleep.
It's like his wish works and despite all the odds, I do dream today.
. . . ∞ . ∞ . ∞ . ∞. . .
| . . . C H A P T E R . . . 1. 1 2 . 2 : S T E A L - A - B R E A TH - O R - T W O . . . |
On hearing the sound of rattling keys, I stirred awake. Paul was unlocking the cell door. I lifted my head off of Arnav's shoulder.
Wait...
I did a double take on realizing our position. When had this happened? Why was my arm hooked around his? As my brain started catching up, I flinched and pulled back. The sudden move woke him up as well.
"What's going on?" he asked pinching the bridge of his nose.
Paul stepped in the cell, explaining. "Everything is cleared. You are free to go?"
"How?" I asked but did I have to? We were free.
"Your friends." He advised, "Next time, don't eat a brownie if you don't find it in a fridge."
I muttered, "I still don't see the big deal."
Arnav lifted his hand and I followed so Paul could uncuff our wrists. I rubbed mine as soon as it was free of that weight.
Arnav said, "Let's go. I'll explain later," and then nodded at Paul in gratitude for letting us go without charging us. I slipped my arms through the sleeves of the jacket and we collected our personals before getting outside where others were waiting for us.
The first thing Kripa did was slap my arm while Arnav slapped the back of Ron's head. "You idiot," he said to him.
I winced and demanded of Kripa, "Ow! What was that for?"
"Why would you eat that?"
"Because it was a brownie?"
Arnav asked Ron, "Why would you put it in a desk? Couldn't you find a better place?"
Ron defended, "I thought I was going to sleep in that room so I put it there. How was I going to know she would...?"
They went on to banter but their voices disappeared in a faint distance as I felt myself getting dizzy. There was a heavy ringing in my ear. "Khushi?" Kripa called and I fall back, reaching out to grab someone's arm for support. Then, I blank out.
. . . ∞ . ∞ . ∞ . ∞. . .
There seemed to be hundreds of pounds of weight over my body as I gained consciousness. A cold patch was placed over my forehead and I winced at the contact.
A soft, familiar voice called out, "Khushi?" I managed to flutter my eyes open despite how heavy they felt and lifted my hands towards my forehead where it felt cold. A wet towel. I peeled it off my face while scrunching. Those little things. They might be beneficial but that didn't mean I liked them.
Arnav's eyes met mines, "Are you okay?"
I sidelined his question for the time begin and pressed the back of my hand to my neck to get a rough estimate of how high my temperature was. Felt pretty high. Just great. I looked around to the unfamiliar room which belonged to Anjali but mines for the weekend.
I asked attempting to sit up and managing after a shot of pain traveled through my body. "Where's everyone?" My legs were sore and the adrenaline wearing off was making itself noticeable.
He took the wet towel out of my hand and dipped it in the iced water bowl again. "They didn't want to go but I made them sleep."
That's when I notice it was still dark outside. "What time is it?"
"About 4:30" He squeezed the water off the piece of cloth.
"Say what now?" I exclaimed hearing that. I lifted my hand to stop him from putting it on my forehead again, "You will regret it if you do that."
He sighed dropping the towel back in the bowl.
"Did you pull another all-nighter?"
This time, he answered through shrugging his shoulders. Instantly, I start to feel guilty. The first night might not have been my fault but this one certainly was.
"I'm sorry. You probably think I am such a pain in your life..."
He narrowed his eyes at first as if to scold me but then they softened. "Not a pain, sweet pea, but yes, you do steal a breath or two every time you pull a stunt and worry me."
For the longest seconds, I could only stare into his eyes, grasp his words. They both captured me frozen as if in an enchantment. I had to have misheard him. I... worry him?
I asked after clearing my throat and blinking away, "C-can you get me my bag?"
He looked around for where it sat on the chair. With one leaning motion, he grabbed it and passed it over. While I opened the small front pocket, he sat at the edge of the bed once again. I pulled out the bottle of medicine and tilted it in my palm till a pill dropped. I gulped it down at once.
"Water?"
I shook my head. Normally, yes but these pills only gave a horrible after taste when water was added to the mix. I'd rather deal with the subtle taste.
"What's it for?"
I don't answer. If I answered this one question, there'd be tons more that I won't be able to answer for sure. There were some answers no one should know. Some things you keep to yourself.
I glanced up to find him trying to read the name on the bottle. I quickly put it back in the bag and zipped it up while scolding, "Stop being sneaky, Raizada."
He commented, "Sue me for being concerned."
That pang of guilt reappeared. He did deserve something for everything he constantly kept doing for me, didn't he?
He added another question, "Why did you faint? Didn't you eat enough?"
"I did," I replied lowering my gaze to my hands on my lap.
"Then?"
I breathed in trying to keep my heart beating at a steady and even pace. I continued to avoid his direct gaze as I informed. "Um, that night... it was stormy too."
First second, silence. The next, I heard him inhale and knew he had understood what I meant. "The whole time while we were locked up, you were..."
"Yeah." I quickly said not needing for him to complete that sentence.
The whole time I was fighting my inner demons, my past. Being locked up hadn't helped. It made me feel restricted and it just may be the worst possible reminder of the night when my say didn't matter, when I was pinned against my will, when my freedom was taken as if my say meant nothing.
I thought he might apologize, maybe try to sympathize. He didn't. I can't say I was upset over it because it wasn't what I was looking for anyway. Plus, the words he did speak made me feel something beyond what words can explain.
"I promise you, Khushi, you'll never feel that way again. I won't ever let you. I'll make sure." I could tell he meant every word, every emotion, every intention of that promise.
I couldn't be certain over what would happen tomorrow but he made me want to believe his certainty, of the promise of this future he was making me. I believed that I would never again feel my freedom being threatened or my will disregarded so long as he was a part of my life.
. . . ∞ . ∞ . ∞ . ∞. . .