Lilliana allowed Dominick to support her as they walked. She barely paid any attention to the direction they were going in. Instead she replayed in her mind what had just happened. Over and ver she watched Tancred murder her father. Over and over she tried to find a way to save him.
There was no way. No possible way that Father had died. Maybe she had been mistaken? Maybe that man had just looked like her father. Or maybe he was still alive. Maybe he had just been faking his death. If so, they should go back. They should go and get him before those soldiers took his body away.
But then she remembered how his body had fallen in the flames. Remembered his clothes catching fire and spreading to his very flesh. Even if he had been faking his death, his body had been burned. She could think of no way he could have faked that.
Dominick jostled her and released his hold on her. He pointed imperiously at a ladder to the ground. Pulling her skirts out of the way, Lilliana climbed down obediently. Maura, or rather, Perrin, followed after and Dominick brought up the rear.
At the bottom, Lilliana turned and faced home. She looked back at Dominick, confused. The plan had been to go to a senate member's house, Senator Yula and her husband had supplies and a way out of the city.
The front door flew open and Mother stepped out. The tears Lilliana had thought dried up returned and she flew into her mother's arms. She clung to her mother for a long time, neither noticing nor caring that Perrin and Dominick were standing just behind her. She heard Dominick's deep voice say something softly and Mother gently pulled her into the house. The door closed and soon enough Lilliana found herself seated by the fire, Mother still close at hand.
"I couldn't--couldn't stop them." She said, her voice trembling. "I couldn't save him. Either of them."
Mother looked surprised. "Either of them? Either of who?"
"Lord Tibol and...and Father."
"Oh my dear Ana, Lord Tibol too?"
She managed to nod, screwing up her face to try and stop the tears. She rubbed her eyes until they stung. She knew there was little time to cry, but while she had held in the tears when Lord Tibol was killed, she could not do so after what she had seen done to Father.
Taking a deep breath, she looked around for the first time.
"Where...?"
"They're in the other room, Ana. They wanted to give us some privacy."
Mother's face was also streaked with tears. Mother was crying. That, more than even seeing what Tancred had done, proved that Father was dead. This was no trick, so faked death. Mother never cried, Lilliana could not remember any other time she had seen her mother upset like this. It could only mean one thing, Father was truly dead.
The last bit of hope Lilliana had of seeing Father alive disappeared.
They sat by the fire together. Lilliana shuddered to remember the ring of fire around Father. But slowly, the tears faded and the fire washed a warmth over her skin. She resisted the endless loop of what she could have done differently. She resisted the endless wishing for a different outcome, or at least a chance to say goodbye. She resisted the endless agony of wanting to see him alive once more.
There would be time for proper mourning.
Swallowing hard, Lilliana straightened her back. She would not let Father have died in vain. It was time they got out of the city.
"Mother, I have to get out of the city. Me and my companions. I don't think it's safe for us here." She took her mother's hand. "You should come with us, it might not be safe for you here either. If these men went after Father..." she let her words trail off, unable to bring herself to imagine Tancred and his soldiers attacking Mother.
"My Ana, I cannot leave the senate at a time like this. I am the leader of the senate, I knew from the start it could be a dangerous job. If I abandon our people now, what kind of leader would I be?" She sighed. "But I will do what I can to help you leave. I must stay here, but I would also rather see you safely out of this city."
"Thank you, Mother."
"Go, join your...companions. I will see what I can do to help."
Her mother left the room, disappearing out the front door. Lilliana felt as if there was a weight on her chest. She prayed the spirits kept her mother safe out there.
In the sitting room, she found Perrin and Dominick looking angrily in different directions. They each sat in the overstuffed armchairs that the senate members always prefered, but Lilliana found distinctly uncomfortable. Somehow, it was obvious that neither Perrin nor Dominick enjoyed the other's company.
Pressing a hand over her eyes, which still stung from crying, Lilliana took a deep breath.
"Had enough crying then?" Dominick said, his tone once again bored.
"Oh will you shut up already?" Perrin snapped. "Why don't you be quiet unless you have something actually useful to say."
"Excuse me? I happen to be the only reason either of you made it out of that prison alive."
"And that gives you a reason to act like this?"
"Like what exactly?"
"Enough." Lilliana said wearily. "We have to get ready to go. If the two of you could go to the kitchen to get some food that would be helpful. I'm going to change into something more suitable to wear."
"Fine."
"Fine."
The other two stood and Perrin followed Dominick, clearly annoyed that she needed to follow since she had never been to the kitchen before.
Turning away, Lilliana hurried to her bedchamber. She pushed aside her nice dresses and fancy clothes. Instead she took out an outfit her father had had made for her. The thick leggings were made of a tough fabric, but were still loose fitting enough so that she would feel she could blend in with the nobility. The long tunic was also made of tough fabric. Her father had had it made for the journey they had been planning on taking. Together they had been going to go to some of the islands to the south of the capital.
But that had been before the emperor fell ill. And before both the emperor and her father died.
Shaking her head, Lilliana quickly pulled on the new clothes, still stiff fitting. She took the pack her father had given her and put what few supplies she was sure she would need without being too much weight. Then she hurried back to the main part of the house and down to the kitchens to meet up with Perrin and Dominick.
Packs had been filled with food and water, but her two companions still seemed at odds. She came in just in time to hear Perrin exclaiming something about Dominick being "little more than a stowaway" because he refused to carry a pack.
"It's a little hard to carry a pack when I'm incorporeal." He said, not even looking at Perrin, "Which is what I am most of the time. This is a special scenario that I do not wish to extend beyond the necessary."
"Beyond the necessary? So just deciding we have to bring less food for more people is beyond the necessary?"
"Less food for more people? Are you really as stupid as you look? I don't eat food."
For a moment Perrin actually looked at a loss for words.
"You don't eat food?"
Dominick rubbed his temples and closed his eyes. "No, I don't. I'm an ancient spirit of wind. I don't need to eat food and I would rather spend as little time in this form as possible. It uses up energy to keep together a corporeal form like this and I'm much more useful when I am part of the crystal. Besides, do you think I like looking like you foolish humans?"
"Every time I leave you two start bickering." Lilliana interrupted.
"Lady Lilliana--"
"If he wasn't such a--"
Lilliana held up a hand and was surprised when both of them stopped talking, although Dominick looked sour about it.
"Let's just finish getting out supplies together and go. Mother should be back any minute now. I hope."
"The Lady Harwin has left?" Dominick said, so surprised he actually stood up from his seat.
"Yes, she went to get help so we could leave the city."
Perrin looked confused. "Then the 'ally' that we were supposed to go meet before?"
Lilliana hesitated. "I'm not sure. After what happened to my...after what happened on our way here I don't know what is and isn't safe anymore. They may still be our best way out of the city. But we don't know what that leech Tancred knows about our allies. So, I think it's best we wait until Mother returns. All the same, we should be ready to leave as soon as she arrives."
Dominick frowned. "Whether Tancred knows about our allies or not I still believe we should follow Olian's original plan."
"But for all we know Senator Yula is already dead."
A heavy knocking boomed on the front door. The three companions froze.
Lilliana took a step towards the door. Mother should be the only one coming, but the voice that shouted for entry was definitely a soldier's. "But..."
"Time is up!" Dominick said, grabbing her hand and pulling her in the direction of the kitchen door.
A package of food was pushed into her pack, Perrin was pulling on her own bag, and Dominick returned to his crystal in a swirl of blue light.
"Now," Dominick said, his voice inside of her head again, "We head for Senator Yula's."
And if Father's plan doesn't work?
"We will figure something else out if the time comes."
And Mother? She's still out there somewhere. What if she's in trouble?
Dominick gave no response.