It was now early November and Autumn leaves were falling from the trees. Alan was sitting in his lounge one Saturday evening, waiting for Clare. She was coming round to watch a video with him and he was going to order pizza. Two bottles of her favourite wine were already cooling in the fridge, together with two chocolate mousses from Marks and Spencer.
As Alan lay stretched out on the sofa, easy listening music playing in the background, his mind wandered. If his mind wandered, it was usually Clare who took his thoughts. She was still upset about Hal and Angie had told him recently that she'd heard Clare crying bitterly one night in her bedroom. It was very upsetting and had Angie worried, but Matthew said it was best not to interfere. It would be Hal's birthday at the end of November and Clare was going to the cemetery with her mother to visit the grave on the first anniversary of his death, in January. Both of these events would be difficult for her, he knew.
He also knew he had a long way to travel yet, in his pursuit of Clare. It was incredible to think that it was almost a year since Hal's death. The time had flown by for him, but not for her. He'd enjoyed his year, although it was hard watching her suffer. 'That's life though', he thought, 'there are always winners and losers.' He wasn't sure if Clare could ever have feelings for him, but one thing he did know, he was glad Marie was no longer part of his life and hopefully their divorce would be through soon and he would be a free man, at last.
The bell rang and Alan rose from the sofa to answer the door. There was Clare, standing in the doorway looking so appealing that he found it difficult not to gather her up into his arms and kiss her, but he smiled at her instead.
"Hello Clare, come on in."
She stepped into the hallway.
"Hello Alan, you look nice. That shirt's very attractive." She removed her jacket, saying, "You should wear blue more often, it brings out the colour of your eyes."
"Ooh, compliments," said Alan, taking her jacket and hanging it on a coat peg. "What are you after?"
She smiled. "A video, pizza and a glass or two of wine, I hope." she replied.
Alan closed the front door and followed her into the lounge. He was feeling nervous. He knew it was stupid, but somehow inviting her to his apartment was intimate and made him feel jittery, although they were just good friends as far as she was concerned. Clare sat down on the small sofa near the television.
"I like that music. Who is it?" asked Clare.
"M People. They are good. Their music always cheers me up if I'm feeling low."
"Yes, I know what you mean, it's lively and positive." said Clare.
Alan was pleased with her remarks, as he'd taken a lot of trouble to find music that wouldn't upset her. It seemed his hard work had paid off. He ordered a pizza and when it arrived they sat at the dining table and he poured the wine.
"The room looks lovely, Alan. Did you decorate it yourself?" she asked.
"Oh, no! I'm no good at that. It didn't really need a coat of paint, but I thought just as well to freshen it up. I had a local decorator in. I was pleased with his work and he was a tidy worker. I do hate mess." He smiled at her and she smiled back.
"I do know that, Alan." she said. She paused and then laughed.
"Remember how dirty I used to be when I was a little girl? I was always messy! It used to drive mum to distraction! She said to me just recently, "Clare, if you ever have children, I do hope one of them is just like you used to be – it would serve you right!"
"I remember that day at school when you were covered in chocolate and all the children called you 'chocolaty Clare'."
"Oh," said Clare "I thought they were calling me 'chocolate éclair'."
"No!" said Alan "They were calling you chocolaty Clare."
"Isn't that funny? I always thought that, how strange!"
They laughed about it and it seemed to break the ice with Alan and he began to relax.
"I remember that awful dress you had to go home in, it was terrible. It was all faded down the front. You looked a right sight. Where did they get those things from? They were only fit for the dustbin, in my opinion." They laughed again. Alan felt good seeing Clare so happy.
They finished eating and he poured them both another glass of wine. "That was a lovely pizza, thank you. And those mousses... to die for." said Clare.
"You're welcome, thanks for coming. I do get a bit lonely, sometimes."
He wasn't interested in talking about pizza he was more interested in sitting by Clare on the sofa.
"Let's go and sit on the sofa." he said. "It's more comfortable."
Obediently, she went to the sofa taking her wine glass with her and setting it down on the side table. He came and sat beside her.
"You did order a taxi, didn't you Clare?" he asked.
"Yes, but I wasn't sure what time to book it for. Angie said midnight, so I did. Is that okay?
Do you go to bed late, Alan? I always stay up until at least midnight reading. I can't get to sleep if I go earlier."
"Midnight is fine." said Alan. He was usually in bed by ten thirty, he found it impossible to keep his eyes open any longer, but tonight he wished she could stay with him all night and not just leave at midnight. "You'll be Cinderella, then." he said.
"I suppose I will. Shame there's no Prince Charming."
She grew quiet and Alan, sensing she was thinking of Hal, changed the subject.
He swirled the wine around in his glass and then took a sip.
"Did you go on that trip to the Museum, when we were at school, Clare?"
"No, I don't think so. Why do you ask?"
"Oh, no, you were in another English group weren't you? We all went to the Museum and the English teacher, Mrs Hill, made us write an essay on it. It was the most boring day I've ever spent. I have never felt so un-inspired in my whole life. The Museum was dusty, old and horrible and smelt like rotten eggs."
Clare smiled. "I did go there, but not with the school. I do know what you mean."
"She said to write an essay and not to use the word 'nice'." said Alan. "She wouldn't accept it. How she thought we could say anything nice about that trip, I can't think, because it was absolutely awful. I was rather a facetious 14 year old, I expect you remember and I thought to myself 'Right, have it your own way, I won't use the word nice.' You should have heard some of the words the other kids used to describe it. They were apt and rather colourful, but we didn't dare use them in our essay. Mrs Hill would have had a fit."
"What did you do?" Clare asked.
"I decided to be sarcastic. I said the trip to the Museum was 'SUPERCALIFRAGILISTICEXPIALIDOCIOUS". I couldn't spell it, of course." Alan smiled. "Mrs Hill was not impressed, Clare, believe you me. She sent a letter home to mum saying "Alan is 'The Joker' in the class" and mum said "Tell me something I don't know. Couldn't you have just left it at 'super' Alan, why did you have to say that?" But that's not all, Clare. That's not the end of it."
Alan was laughing loudly by now, he'd thrown his head back and was holding his stomach with one hand.
"You're unbelievable." laughed Clare.
"No, stop a minute, there's more." Alan stopped while he caught his breath.
"Two lessons later the teacher handed back the English book, she'd marked another essay since then, also written sarcastically and she said "Alan you can be very facetious. It's not a good thing to be." and I replied "But Miss, I don't know what facetious means."
She shouted at me. "Then look it up in the dictionary, that's what it's there for!" and I said "And Miss, you tell us not to use the word 'thing' and now you've just used it yourself." She was angry by now. "Look facetious up in the dictionary, Alan and tell me how to spell it" and of course I was looking under 'ph' I didn't have a clue how to spell it. Again she shouted at me. "Come on, how do you spell it?" and I replied "You spell it 'IT' " the whole class exploded with laughter and you know what came next, I expect, I had detention for a whole month... a whole flaming month! She never liked me after that. If looks could kill, I would have died."
By now Clare was laughing so hard that she was sliding down on the red leather sofa and she placed her hand on his knee, momentarily, to steady herself. He was enjoying himself, (and not just because her hand had touched his knee). He hadn't laughed so much for a long time. He carried on with his tale.
"In the end we all had a list of the same words, they were:-
Delightful, Horrible, Wonderful, Awful, Fantastic, Dreadful, Super, Nasty.
Happy and Good (only to be used in an emergency) and last, but not least Endearing.
Of course, when Haydon said the trip to the Museum was 'endearing' Mrs Hill, lost it completely and we all thought she was going to cry. No doubt he had a letter home too."
"I wish I'd been a fly on the wall." laughed Clare.
"There were always several flies in the classroom." said Alan "They used to dive bomb at us and wizz about our ears, it was impossible to concentrate."
"Is that really true?" Clare asked.
"Yes, the honest truth. . . except for the flies." He grinned at her, his usual boyish grin. They laughed a little more and then fell into a happy, relaxed silence.
"My worst fault at school, was going off at a tangent." Clare said "I still do it now."
"But everyone does it," said Alan "you start off talking about cheese and the next thing you know you're talking about car engines or hang gliding, or something."
"I know we all do it, but I'm an expert at it. Hal used to laugh at me, but then I used to laugh at him, the ridiculous things he did, so we were quits. It must be awful to be married to someone whose habits annoy, rather than making you laugh. It could drive you mad!" Clare paused. "Hal said he loved my little foibles."
"Should you be telling me this?" asked Alan pulling a face "Sounds a bit personal to me."
"Don't you know what a foible is?" asked Clare, seriously.
"No, but I'm sure you're going to tell me!" said Alan.
She ignored his comment and carried on. "We used to have debates during the English lessons. Once we discussed religion and somehow or other we ended up talking about Nursing Homes. I got the blame, of course!"
"Best days of your life or not?" asked Alan.
"Not." replied Clare.
"Why do people say it's the best days of your life?" asked Alan "I hated school, really hated it and that doesn't say much for the rest of your life, does it? I'm looking forward to having children of my own, some day. I want those days to be the best of my life."
"I think they mean childhood, really, not school. You have no responsibilities as a child and you are hopefully innocent and hopefully carefree."
"We certainly were, weren't we? We had a brilliant childhood." said Alan.
Clare agreed. "Yes," she said. "We really did."
In the end, they talked so long about the past and their childhood that all interest in the video was lost.
So they spent an 'endearing' evening together and Alan was sorry when she had to leave. He took her down, just before midnight, to wait for the taxi. When it arrived, she said the usual 'thing' as she settled herself on the back seat.
"You're a good friend, Alan, thank you for a lovely evening. I feel so much better for all that laughing."
Alan's heart sank each time she said the good friend part, but he waved her off happily and went back up to his apartment. He wanted to be much more than her friend, if only she would let him. If only...
He went to bed and as he slept he had a strange dream. He dreamt he was still at school and the teacher was shouting at him 'Joker, Joker'. He woke up in a sweat at 4.30 am in the morning, thankful that he was thirty years old and would never have to go to school again. But he did know that he was still the 'Joker' in the pack... and a 'Heel', to boot!
* * * * * * *
The word 'SUPERCALIFRAGILISTICEXPIALIDOCIOUS' is the name
of a song from the film 'Mary Poppins' starring Julie Andrews and
Dick Van Dyke, made in the 1960's.