There’s a moment of excitement, panic even when you’re introduced to something brand new. How will it affect your future? What will you decide what to do with it? Is it something you should love or hate? And an even bigger question in my situation: to do, or not to do?
Those are only a few questions that explode like fireworks in my head, blowing apart to reveal all of the consequences of each decision inside.
“Let’s play dirty.”
Those first three words that Austin says to us Sunday afternoon in Alex’s basement make a wave of shock run through my body. Let’s play dirty.
“Let’s do something that makes Justin eat his own words.”
Ten more words and goosebumps break-out across my arms while my stomach twists in excitement. Make Justin eat his own words.
“Don’t get me wrong, Reese, Sean. I liked your original plot of revenge, but that seems a bit unrealistic, doesn’t it? I’ve got an improved, low-key, yet scandalous, plan for taking Justin down a few pegs.”
I tilt my head from side to side, agreeing with him. Even I knew in the beginning that our plot was unrealistic, but I wasn’t in a state to come up with a new idea. However, it looks like Austin has. Whatever it is, he seems genuinely proud of it. He stands with his shoulders back, chest out, smiling only slightly smugly. Kris and Alex nod along with him, looking directly at Sean and I. They must know about what Austin is talking about.
“Are you ready to hear it?”
I nod quickly, looking out of the corner of my eye at Sean who nods once, his eyes concentrated on the shorter boy in front of him.
Austin smiles to himself and then turns to face Kris, motioning him to stand next to him. Kris beams largely, pulling his laptop from behind his back and holds it out in front of Sean and I.
“We make a Karma website,” Kris says simply with a sly grin and arched eyebrows.
My eyes widen a little and my mouth falls open, closes again, and opens before I can get my brain to put a coherent sentence together.
“Like, the Heartbreaker site Laney made for Justin?” I ask.
“Exactly,” Alex says now as he joins the other two boys in front of us, “and we post videos of us singing.”
“Justin might have Laney, the computer geek,” Austin says wisely, “but we’ve got Kris, the computer genius.”
“And Justin might have Stephanie the stalker,” Kris adds humorously, “but we’ve got Reese, the insider.”
I blink a couple times in pure shock. This really defines going behind someone’s back. This isn’t stabbing a friend in the back (if he could even be considered a friend at this point), this is like leaving tiny scratches here and there until finally his whole back is ripped apart, proving that the little things do really add up.
Oh, what am I even saying? This is amazing, scandalous, and so “bad” I can barely hold in my excitement. However, there’s always this stupid little red flag swishing around in my head. But, what do I care? I don’t want to be with Justin anymore. None of us do. No matter how attractive or charming he can be, it’s not worth the lying and the using. I have to un-attach myself. There are more important things in my life I want to be worrying about. This is just a ton of dumb high school drama. I can relish in it for a while, but eventually I’m going to have to let this all go. For now, I’ll relish.
“It’s perfect,” I hear myself saying with determination that maybe only I can detect.
“I love it,” Sean says only seconds after, and when I turn my head I see he’s got a boyish half-smile on his face.
“I thought it was great, you know. The sooner we can get out of this mess, the better,” Austin tells us, his eyes flitting to meet everyone else’s, “If I didn’t want to get back at Justin so bad, I would have quit already.”
“Me too,” I agree with him.
Alex shudders suddenly and makes a face. “I feel so dirty being involved with all of this.”
“Not much longer, hopefully,” Kris assures him with a small smile.
My lips purse. How are we going to do this without getting detected by Justin? Or, maybe that’s the point? How perfect. I can just see Justin’s face when he stumbles across the Karma website, all angry wrinkles and dangerous eyes. He looks perfectly unattractive that way.
The boys around me are talking excitedly about the idea. I don’t say anything, though. All I can think about is how much I just want this whole thing to be over with, how much I want to just shoot a video and post it online for Justin to see, how much I just want to drop Justin like a bad habit.
Finally, Kris opens up his laptop and sits down on the couch that I shared with Sean last weekend. Austin and the other boys gather around him and watch him pull up the internet, all of them throwing out suggestions for domain names. My lips tug up into a little smile when I see Sean lean down to get a better look at what Kris is doing, his guitar pick necklace dangling off of his neck.
That’s when I remember. Twisting around to reach into the my shoulder bag, I reach in and pull out an odd number of black boxes.
“Hey, boys,” I call over to them. Four heads shoot up to look at me and I wiggle my eyebrows. “Look what I’ve got.”
I toss the three boxes over to Austin, Kris, and Alex, each of them scrambling to find the right box. When they realize they’re their guitar pick necklaces they chatter in excitement, pulling them from the boxes and reading the back.
“Karma,” Alex reads, pausing for a moment before his face breaks out into a smile, “It’s on the back. That’s genius, Shortcake!”
“This is what you wanted to do?” Austin asks with a raised eyebrow, “Well, jeez, you could have told us!”
“I wanted it to be a surprise,” I tell him while he throws the pick around his neck.
“Ugh, I’ve felt so naked without this thing,” Alex moans once he’s got the necklace on, clutching the guitar pick in his hand like he’s finally found something that was lost.
“You’re welcome,” I roll my eyes.
“Thank you!” they all chime together. Sean catches my eye from across the room and gives me a thumbs up. I can’t hold down the smile the stretches across my face, or the tingly feeling I get all over.
When everything’s all sorted, Kris orders me over so that we can create the website and begin planning our first move.
~*~
Surprisingly, Stephanie is outside when I arrive home later that afternoon. Her hair is in a single loose braid down her back and she has a pretty, girly tank top on with shorts. At least she learned something from me.
Bur, you can’t take the crazy out of the girl, no matter how hard you try.
In front of her house are flower beds and pots galore. Her mother has a green thumb and isn’t afraid to let it show. Their yard always looks nice in the summer. Especially with all of the bird baths scattered around. It looks so cute.
Stephanie teeters over to one of the flower pots at the front of the walkway and ducks down with a watering can to douse the soil with cool water.
Remembering Justin’s strange encounter with Stephanie the other evening, I decide to go over and talk to her. I’m Reese, the insider, remember? Plus, I haven’t heard from the girl in a while, and it’s worrisome.
She sees me coming and stands up straight, the watering can hanging from her loose grip limply.
“Hi, Reese,” she greets me with quick smile. I try to hide the fact that my eyes narrow at the way she says it, and pretend to shade my eyes from the sun.
“Hi, Stephanie,” I say back sweetly, stopping in front of her with a large smile. “How have you been? What have you been up too?” I ask pleasantly.
She shrugs and turns to walk away from me. My mouth drops open. Rude.
She turns to look over her shoulder, though, as she stops in front of another flower pot and bends down to water it. “I’ve been great. I’ve been…taking a lot of pictures. I got a lot of good ones on Wednesday,” she answers casually.
This time, I don’t even hide the fact that my eyes have narrowed to slits or that my jaw has suddenly clenched.
“Oh yeah,” I say, “what kind of pictures?”
She clears her throat and stand up straight, again. Sending me a light smile, she turns herself to face me. “Oh, just pictures of you fainting in front of everyone. Those are the most popular ones on the website right now. You’re kind of like a laughing-stock.”
The urge, the incredible urge to walk up and slap her, to pull out her hair, and to rub her face in one of the nearest flower beds consumes me. The way she says it, like a sneer. The way she puts her hand on her hip, like a prep. The way she gives me a coy little smile, fake. But, I don’t do anything. I just feel my face burn and my whole body become rigid.
Bitch.
“Excuse you?” I say warningly under my breath.
There’s this new look on her face, one I’ve never seen on Stephanie’s face before. This is a look I see on all of those spoiled little wannabes at school, the one that they give you when they get all snooty. Ones that say, “I’m better than you.”
“What, bitch?” she asks me, “Did I say something?”
My eyes widen in disbelief, my whole body coursing with hot, burning anger. Finally, I can’t control myself anymore. That’s the last straw. I throw my skateboard to the side and march up to her, stopping when my face is threateningly close to hers and knock the watering can from her hand.
“Look, you little creep,” I say lowly, “I helped you. I was your only friend for years.”
She scoffs, shoving me back by the shoulders. “Bitch,” she says, “you were never my friend. You’re a liar, a user, and selfish little princess. And you know what? You’re not even that pretty. Trust me, you’d be nothing without your voice. You’d be just like me.”
“You’re so jealous,” I shoot back, stomping up to shove her back, now. “What is it Justin is telling you? What is it Laney is telling you? What happened to you, Stephanie? You think I’m a bitch? Listen to yourself!”
“Please,” she hisses, “Justin doesn’t have to tell me anything. I get it all on camera! You cheater!” she lets out one little ha, loud and humorous before she continues, “You can’t keep your tongue in your mouth, can you? That’s right, I know about Sean and now, so does Justin.”
Crack.
Solid. Right across the face, leaving a red mark burning into her cheek after. She slowly turns her face back to look at me, her teeth barred, her eyes watering from the slap. My lips are pressed tightly together, waiting for it, waiting for her to attack me.
Oh, I’m ready.
Most times, it happens in slow motion, but not this time. No, it’s fast and with the blood pounding hard in my ears I can’t hear a thing. The adrenaline exploding through my body numbs all feeling. It’s just claws. She jumps me, pulling at my hair, fingernails breaking the skin on my arms. I use my knee to jab her in the gut, making her keel over. If I was psychotic, I would wrap my hands around her tiny neck and never let go. Instead, I claw at her face, and she claws at mine. Both of us pull and tug and hit until we’re on the ground, knocking over the watering can. I roll her over so that she lands right in the mud and she retaliates by grabbing the tipped over watering can and pouring the remaining water over me. I shriek and she laughs, rolling us over so that she can have the upper hand at rubbing wet soil in my face. I’m pulling at the roots of her sickly colored hair when Stephanie is suddenly ripped off of me. My eyelashes are glued together with mud, so I can’t make out who has stopped the fight until I hear the soft sounding voice of Stephanie’s mom, now high-pitched and screaming.
I crawl back, pushing myself away from them while wiping the wet dirt out of my eyes. Stephanie’s mom is raged and yelling at Stephanie, making a huge scene.
“Stephanie Bell!” she screeches, “what the hell are you doing?” Suddenly she turns to me, “Reese?”
My breathing is ragged, my heart pounding, but somehow I manage a, “Hey, Mrs. Bell.”
“What is going on?” she asks, dramatically yanking her hand away from Stephanie’s arm. Stephanie glares at me, but says nothing. I’m left to fend for myself.
Slowly, I stand up, pushing my hair from my face.
“It’s nothing but a realization that I’m a bitch and this is my fault,” I say tensely, “and your daughter is a stalker, by the way. If you don’t believe me I’d check her nightstand drawer. She has a photo book dedicated entirely to Justin Knight’s life. She’s also won herself the nickname of Stalker Stephanie at school. I’m sure both of our mothers are very proud of us,” I say venomously. Her mother’s jaw drops and I give a little bow before turning around, snatching up my skateboard, and marching over to my house.
~*~
There is no phone call that night from Stephanie’s mom. My mother remains clueless about the whole ordeal, and so does the rest of my family, which is exactly the way I’d like this to stay.
I am embarrassed about the whole thing. How could I lose so much control? Not to mention the state of my face is humiliating. I’ve got scratches and a bruise on my jaw. I had to tell my mom that I fell off of my skateboard. She almost didn’t buy it.
Lies. More lies.
I think that at this point she’s just letting me lie, my mom. For some reason I think she’s letting me figure this all out on my own. It’s great, really, but at the same time I’d almost like her to step in and tell me to quit everything, that way I can just run away and be the coward I am.
For some reason, that’s not the only thing that’s making me feel bad. No, it’s the fact that Justin knows. He knows. He knows about Sean and I. Stalker Stephanie, how could I have missed it. It was dumb of me to kiss Sean in the living room right in front of huge windows. I knew she was creeping on me. I’m the easiest target being her neighbor, and all. I bet she’s been telling Justin everything I do. I bet that’s what they were talking about that one night.
This is all so strange. This isn’t supposed to normally happen. Why can’t I live a normal life with normal friends? Why can’t I live a clichéd life? You know, where I fall in love for the first time and that’s that. I get married to the hot-shot and live happily ever after. Wouldn’t that be great? If my life was a cliché?