We were seen almost immediately since for some reason they weren't too busy in that moment. This lady was saying all sorts of legal mumbo jumbo and we were all getting frustrated.
"What do you mean we can't adopt her?" Jared asked.
"I mean that because she has been out of the orphanage for 5 years and her parents filed for the adoption before she became a legal adult, you can not adopt her. It's in the hands of her parents."
"How much do I need to pay to get it to where we can adopt her? It's not safe for her to be with her parents. They're both ex cons with a history of abuse." He asked.
"You can't bribe government or state agencies, Mr. Padalecki. You can contact the family and see if they'll throw out the papers but that is all you can do."
"Ok." We got up.
"Have a good day." I told her before we left. Jared was fired up. "Jared, relax."
"I will not relax. I am not letting you stay with your parents. That is not the kind of environment you need to be in." Gen calmed him down.
"Jared, I'll get their number from my brother and you can call them and see what we can do, ok?" He nodded and we drove back to his place. I texted Stephen.
Do you have our parents' numbers?
Yeah. 123-555-7687
Thanks.
"Jared, I have their number. Please go easy on them." He nodded and went to another room with me to call them and had them on speaker.
"Hi, Mrs. Harrison? My name is Jared and I am the person who Sarah is staying with. I understand that you have submitted papers for her adoption? Well, my wife and I were planning on adopting her, but the court system says that we can't because you filed the papers while she was still a minor."
"Well she is my daughter. Just because I went through a rough patch and she was taken away doesn't mean she isn't my daughter."
"We aren't saying that. We just feel like she is in a better environment here with us. We love and care about her deeply and she is able to pursue her dreams here with us. She wants to be an actress and we are helping her pursue that. My wife and I both act as well and we just want what's best for her. I'm sure you turned your life around and maybe your husband is even out of jail, but it's just not the best thing for her to be living there. If you want money in exchange for getting rid of the adoption papers, we'll give you money. We just want her safe and in a place that she wants to be. She's 18. She's old enough to decide and she doesn't want to be with you."
"I'll believe that when I hear it."
"Ok. You want to hear it? I don't want to be with you. In fact, I pretty much hate you two. It's because of your life choices that I spent my whole life in living hell. You hated me when I was little too. I remember vague bits and pieces of you two and none of them are good memories. No one kept me and Stephen for very long." I snapped.
"Why would anyone want to keep you and Stephen? You're little troublemakers who defy any and all authority."
"Well of course I defied authority because anywhere was better than with you or any of the foster families. Dad was an angry mess who robbed any place he could get his hands on and you were a high mess all the time. I never got any care or any parenting, just bruises and scars. No one loved me until now. I don't want to be with you. Jared and Gen are who I want as my parents and if you ever truly cared about me, you'd let them be."
"Sarah, you're being unreasonable and you're seriously exaggerating."
"No I'm not. I'm done talking to you. Stay the hell out of my life." I stopped talking and wiped the tears from my face.
"Look, Mrs. Harrison, I'm not trying to be a jerk or start an argument, but Sarah has had a tough life. She just wants to be somewhere she feels loved."
"No. She is our child and we are adopting her. End of story."
"Do you even care? Did you ever care about your daughter?" He asked angrily.
"I tried. Ok? I tried. I was trying to kick the habit when she was born. I wanted to be a good mom but I couldn't. My husband was out robbing stores and houses and was getting out of hand. I got high to cope and ended up neglecting the kids in the process. I never hurt her, my husband did. I tried to get out but I couldn't. I called the cops but they took her away from me because of my addiction too. She was stripped from me before she really knew who I was. She was only 3. I just want a chance to start over or at least see my little girl."
"Is your husband out of jail?"
"No. He gets out soon though. In a couple weeks"
"Listen, I understand that you want to start over, but I still don't think that's best for her. I'll make a deal with you. We'll fly out to wherever you are and meet you at the courthouse. We will switch the papers over and adopt her then we'll let you see your daughter for the rest of the day. How does that sound?"
"Really? You're gonna let me see her?"
"Yes, but we are going to be in the room with her at all times."
"Ok. I understand that. That sounds like a plan."
"What city do you live in?" He asked.
"Jefferson City, Missouri. I left to go there to get a fresh start."
"Ok. How about Saturday you meet us there at 1pm?"
"I'll be there. And Sarah, if you're listening still, I'm sorry." I didn't reply and Jared hung up. I got a major dizzy spell and nearly fell over. I didn't think I was going to pass out, but the room began to spin. Jared caught me.
"Hey. Hey. Sarah? Are you ok?" I nodded.
"Yeah. Just upset and got dizzy."
"Why don't you go lie down?" He helped me back to bed and I laid there. "I didn't mean for you to reveal so much about how life has been for you. I want to be your adoptive dad but that doesn't mean you have to tell me everything."
"I know. I feel like you deserve to know what you're getting into with me though." I told him.
"You don't have to tell me anything."
"I want to. Well, first, about the foster care families- none of them kept me very long because the cops came to almost every one of them. I was abused a lot. Physically and mentally only thank God, but life sucked. I have never been loved. The more I defied authority, the more chance I had of getting out. I hope I haven't been defying you in any way. I've found that I do it unintentionally sometimes. I was so sick and tired of the beatings. I still have scars, I had bruises for what felt like ages. They said so many nasty things to me. I never felt good enough, I never felt like I mattered, I never felt loved, and most of the time, I still don't. The threats from people about the competition reminded me of all of that. I question everything nowadays. I question what everyone says. Half the time I take everything Jensen, Danneel, Misha, you, or Gen say to me with a grain of salt. I've been hurt my whole life and who's to say it won't happen again? You're gonna be the 12th family I've lived with. Many just gave me back but some were arrested. That's another fear I have of agreeing to you adopting me-that you're gonna be just like all the others. I just didn't have the guts to tell you." I told Jared sadly. He joined me, sitting by my feet on the bed.
"Sarah, why didn't you just say that?"
"Because I was scared. I know you're an incredibly nice and kind person and I look up to you so much, but I was scared you would be mad that I don't trust you more than that and then I'd be forced to run." I explained.
"I'd never hurt you, Sarah. Ever. Neither would Gen, Danneel, Jensen, or Misha. Do the guys know you've been wary of trusting them?"
"I don't know."
"Ok. That's beside the point. I can't believe what you've gone through. I tell everyone to always keep fighting in terms of mental health problems mostly, but it applies to you too. Keep pushing on. You matter. Can you explain why you don't feel loved?" He asked. I shook my head. "I'm not mad. I swear."
"Because I don't know what being loved feels like. I never have been."
"Sarah, being loved is when someone cares more about you than themselves, when they genuinely care about you and how you feel, when they would literally take a bullet for you and not hesitate, when they want you to be happy for your benefit, not theirs, and so much more. Love is a sacrifice you choose to make. Gen and I love you, Sarah. The boys and Jensen and Misha and Danneel and everyone else love you too." I nodded as more tears fell. "About the whole defying authority stuff, you haven't defied anyone. You're a good kid. We have very few rules and they're common sense: don't leave without asking and telling us where, no slamming doors, and be polite. I like to add talk to us if you're upset, but if you don't feel like talking, none of us will make you." He replied. He was so considerate of my feelings and making sure I was ok. He truly did love me.
"I love you so much. Those rules really are common sense. Do you think Jensen and Misha can tell I don't trust them?" I asked. I didn't want them to have a bad impression of me.
"I think they probably do. I'll talk to them about it."
"Ok. I know the boys probably want to see me, but-"
"Go ahead and rest. It's ok. You're dealing with a lot." I nodded and ended up falling asleep.