“As far as I know they’ve taken a copy of the recording off the phone, I don’t know much else, but the police man I was speaking to when I picked my phone up this morning said the case would be opened and he’d be charged”
I took a deep breath and ran a tired heavy hand through my messy bed hair. God I must look a fright.
“I don’t need to be scared anymore” I whispered, relieved and shocked at the same time.
“No, you don’t. He won’t be out of jail anytime soon”
Nick pulled his hand back, and lay it in his lap. He darted his eyes away from mine. What had caused his sudden change in demeanor? I craned my neck to see behind me, outside of the glass window of my room and in to the hall. The cruel hard blinding light of a flash stung my eyes. It wasn’t a pap, which was a relief, just some young girl, blonde and tall. Probably someone who had applied to the books… she looked like model material.
“I should probably go” Nick whispered, shuffling forward in his seat
Oh
I really didn’t want him to leave, I wanted to tell him that. But I didn’t.
“Thank you for being there Nick. I owe you my life”
Nick frowned and shook his head emphatically
“No, you don’t owe me a thing Sarah. I owe you, if anything. Call me if you need too. Goodbye”
He spoke like we wouldn’t see each other again, and I knew that once I was back at work, back filing, I probably wouldn’t either. I frowned at the realisation, Not seeing Nick was like eating toast without butter…. To me, it just wasn’t right.
But I couldn’t, I couldn’t be his secret. I’d been a secret, kept a secret for most of my life and secrets were horrible hateful things. Even good secrets left me feeling cold.
Nick leant down and pressed his lips against my forehead then walked over to the door. He looked back over at me one last time, and I just continued staring, hypnotised by my own self pitying trance.
The police paid me a visit, and explained that the recording had been handed over to the detectives in charge of my mothers case. My father had admitted guilt, apparently with glee over how he’d managed to get away with it for over a decade. He explained it meant I wouldn’t need to attend any hearings or make any statements unless there was something else he needed to be charged with.
I didn’t say anything about the abuse, not out of shame… because while I was still battered and bruised by my life with my father, I wasn’t ashamed of myself anymore. I didn’t say anything because I truly felt that he’d get his comeuppance, a life sentence.
If he’d not admitted guilt then I’d have done it, I’d have thrown the book at him and have him put away because of the wrongs against me. But either way he wouldn’t walk the streets anymore, he couldn’t hurt anyone else and that made me happy.
I could close the door on the fear and heartache, and that truly was an amazing gift.
The doctors discharged me later that evening once the effects of the drug had seemed to dissipate completely. Josh, Marc and Janie arrived to collect me. Janie ran for me, pulling me in to a almost unbearably tight hug
“Are you alright? Josh said some guy attacked you!” She exclaimed breathlessly in to my ear
“I’ll explain at home, I should have explained from the start… I’m so sorry about your stuff”
“Don’t be sorry, it’s just stuff, I’m just glad you’re alright!”
We headed home, and at first when we got there my heart thumped and I wondered if I could walk in there, knowing that he’d been in there, what he’d attempted to do… what he would’ve done if Nick hadn’t shown up. I steeled myself, and held back a sob, pleading to escape my mouth.
Janie hooked her arm in mine and we walked up the path together. Marc unlocked the door and slowly we walked inside. He’d dragged me from this very spot down to the bathroom. A stray tear rolled down my cheeks, on to the front of my t-shirt. I continued walking, my arm moving from Janie’s as I walked down to the bathroom. I had to get over it now. I live here.
I opened the door and readied myself for a flood of tears.
But the bathroom looked as it always had. Everything had its place, there were no shards of glass strewn everywhere. There was a window in, an exceptionally clean and new window at that.
I smiled and closed the door again. He didn’t have a hold on me anymore.
I was a stronger person now.
I looked back over at Janie. Marc and Josh stood with her, all three had concerned looks upon their faces, Janie walked over and hugged me again, this time softly.
I explained my life before LA to my new friends. Something I should have done to some degree when I’d moved in. At least so they were aware that I was at risk, which in turn was putting them at risk too. I apologised for that, and even though none of them would accept it, saying it made me feel a whole lot better. Once I had finished, I felt a weight lift off my shoulders. I’d let people in, I’d let them see me, and all my baggage and they didn’t think I was weird or pitied me for my hard life. They were my friends, true friends.
Later that night Marc and Josh were playing Xbox. After having something small for dinner I headed down to my bedroom.
“Sarah!” Janie called out as I passed her room.
I stopped and walked over to her bedroom door. She lay on the bed, I’d hid under a couple of nights ago. Her laptop was propped up in front of her on a cute little laptop table.
“There’s a little more than just sexual attraction between you and Nick isn’t there?” She asked with not one hint of shame.
I just shrugged in response, I didn’t want to open my mouth and speak about Nick, I needed to forget about him, which was insanely hard with Janie questioning me.
“You can tell me, I’m not going to judge”
“I’ve only known him a week Janie”
“And?! You know Romeo and Juliet fell in love the moment they met!”
“Romeo and Juliet were characters in a play, besides… It’s not like that romance ended well”
Janie frowned and looked down at her laptop.
“I’ll google other love at first sight couples! I will” she teased
“You don’t need to do that, I believe in love at first sight, I do. I just don’t think that’s what has happened here. Anyway I’m exhausted, I might go to sleep… I think I’ll be okay for work tomorrow”
“Night Sarah”
“Night.”
I walked out of the bedroom and down to my own room. There was a small box sitting on my bed, wrapped in black with white polka dot wrapping paper and a silver bow. Gingerly I tiptoed to my bed and picked up the gift. I laughed at myself, for behaving like the present was some kind of weapon. I unwrapped the present to find a brand new boxed smart phone. A small post it sat fold up on top so I set the box down and opened the note.
You needed a new one, N.
I smiled then frowned. He couldn’t buy this for me, he couldn’t expect me to keep it.
It was inappropriate, everything we’d done was inappropriate.
I was going to have to see him tomorrow, I was going to have to give him the phone back.
Glumly, I grabbed the box and placed it on my dressing table.
I went to sleep not long after that. When I woke in morning I felt more refreshed than I had in a long time. I showered and dressed before any of the others were up and downed a coffee and bagel for breakfast. By 8 however we were all out the door and on our way to work in Marc’s car.
The smart phone sat inside a small hand bag, still inside its box. I had tossed up giving the box to Janie to hand back, but it would have posed all sorts of questions from her that I didn’t have answers for. Once we were up in the office I walked around to my cubicle, still carrying the bag with the boxed smart phone.
I avoided emailing him all morning, He probably didn’t even realise I’d come to work. He’d probably send me home if he did know.
Unfortunately around 11am my inbox bleeped.
To Roxy Levi RLevi@bookedout.com
From Nikolai Jackson Nikolai@bookedout.com
Subject: You should be at home.
You shouldn’t be here. I want you to go home.
Now.
Argh!! He was insufferable! So bossy, controlling.
To Nikolai Jackson Nikolai@bookedout.com
From Roxy Levi RLevi@bookedout.com
Subject: re: You should be at home.
I feel better than I have in a long time. I’m staying here.
Nick thank you for the phone, but I can buy my own electronics. I’ll drop it off at lunch.
Ha! That’d shut him up, me being bossy back. Or so I’d thought. Before I could finish gloating and get back to work, my email bleeped again.
To Roxy Levi RLevi@bookedout.com
From Nikolai Jackson Nikolai@bookedout.com
Subject: re: You should be at home
It’s yours.
If you bring it to me, Well lets just say I can’t be held responsible for my actions Sar.
You know what I mean.
I gulped and deleted the email. The sexual undertones were not lost on me. I was stuck with the phone, for now at least.
*********************
Just a short chapter for now, will write some more tonight and you may get another update :D
Ive not even spell checked this, so it's in need of editing, sorry bout that!