Here's a brand new story even though I have like 5 unfinished stories in my drafts.
In this story, Kellin is transgender and I happen to be cisgender. I am really close to people who are trans, but I know it is absolutely inevitable that I get some things wrong, so just work with me, and help me out if that happens.
+ the title is inspired by a song called 'Human' by the lovely Dodie Clark.
++ The cover is random as hell, but if any of you guys would like to make me a cover, that would be p cool.
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"Whoa, what about her?" I heard beside me, followed by a few excited slaps to my upper arm. I sighed and looked to my friend Vic. Vic was--for lack of better words-- a slut. He just like really enjoyed sex, and had a tendency of almost constantly bringing girls home to have extremely loud sex with. I would know since I get the honor of sharing a place with him.
It was Saturday night and tonight was just one of the many where Vic would drag me out with him, so he could pick up some girl. I don't know why he brought me with him. Maybe because he didn't really have anyone else, since we were both kind of losers who liked to sit around and watch anime together for days without bothering to shower or eat a decent meal. We were gross. But I wasn't a good wingman. If anything people would just think we were a couple. Most of the time I just sat in the background, quietly while he pulled some girl to hook up with. And then we would have some awkward drive home with them two sat beside me, making out like fucking teenagers.
"Where?" I asked for the sake of not being rude.
"3 o'clock," He said to which I responded with a glare.
"You know I don't know where that is."
"Oh, my god, The pool table!" He exclaimed, desperately. I averted my eyes to the corner of the bar where there were two pool tables. In reality it wouldn't have been that hard to figure out who he was talking about. We almost always came to the same bar. It wasn't some cool, up hipster bar where all the youngsters were. It was a bar that seemed to never have more than 8 people in it at once, and most of them were the same people who came every week (like us) the others where people who obviously didn't live here, and were just looking for a place to get a quick drink.
My eyes feel on a short girl with butterscotch hair that drapped over her shoulders, and impressively reached down to her hips. I couldn't really make out much other details of her, since she was quite a bit away, but I did catch her large breasts when she leaned over to take her turn. No doubt that was what caught Vic's eye.
"She's cute." I said, trying to be as encouraging and as interested as I could in all of this.
"Um, Hey!" Vic called out suddenly. I guess he wasn't enough of a gentleman to get the fuck up and walk over to her. But either way, the girl looked up and over to us with a smile.
"Can I buy you a drink?" Vic called out to her. The girl put the stick thingy -that I didn't know the proper name of - down before making her way over to us.
I couldn't help but stare at her boobs. It was rude.
"What was that?" She asked when she had approached us. Now that she was closer, I was able to make out the large apples in her cheeks, and her sparkling hazel eyes. She really was beautiful.
"Can I buy you a drink?" Vic repeated. He spoke in a voice that sounded like his voice, only dialed all the way to the right. He was trying so hard, and I pray to something that this girl accepts his offer, because if she doesn't he will get all sad and drink far more than he really should.
"Can you buy my friend one too?" She spoke with her sweet, melodic voice.
Both Vic and I leaned forward, looking past the girl to find who she was talking about. I'm sure Vic and I were both expecting some other girl that Vic would eventually throw on me to entertain while he hooks up with her friend here.
"Uh-oh." I voiced when I saw the back of a tall, slim guy.
"Uh...sure." Vic responded, obviously hesitant. We could only assume that the two were together, and this girl was clever enough to use Vic into getting a free drink for the both of them.
The girl smiled happily before quickly running over and grabbing her friend. Even though this wasn't my pick up, I was suffering from some severe second-hand embarrassment. I kept my head down, not even wanting to witness this rejection. The girl came back with her boyfriend or whatever and introduced them.
"I'm Sarah and this is Aaron," She spoke.
"Cool, I'm Vic and this is my friend, Kellin." Vic said, placing a hand on my shoulder. I looked up to this, politely smiling to the two. My eyes finally fell on Aaron, and I completely understood why Sarah was with him. he was beautiful. They were both so stunning. Aaron was tall and had brown eyes like graham crackers and chocolate colored, curly hair that was just long enough for him to tuck behind his ears. I was a sucker for long hair.
"So, uh, is this your boyfriend?" Vic asked awkwardly, which caused the two to begin laughing. Vic and I didn't laugh. We just looked at each other confused, I'm sure.
"God, no! I already told you, he's my friend." She explained. I looked at Vic, who began to smile because his plan had not crashed and burned yet. whether her friend is a guy, or a girl, or whatever, Vic will still throw them on me.
"Oh, well then sit, sit!" Vic encouraged. Sarah went and sat next to Vic, while Aaron came and sat by me. I could already tell this was going to be a long night.
"This happens every time." Aaron murmured, taking a sip from the beer that I paid for. Because If Aaron were a girl, Vic would have bought his drink, but since he is a guy, Vic won't be giving him so much as a second glance. I knew him too well, and I knew he just assumed that I would entertain Aaron like he was my pull.
"What?" I asked.
"Sarah. Guys are always all over her like this." He explained.
"And that bothers you? Do you like her or something?" I assumed.
"What? No." He said appalled with his nose scrunched up. "It's just annoying when we're trying to have a fun night, and the next thing you know she is ignoring me for some random guy."
Oh god, he understands my pain. This poor guy understands what I undergo on a regular weekend basis, and he knows just how annoying it can be.
Throughout the night we drank steadily and ate peanuts that the bar provided. Most of the time my eyes were on my phone. I wasn't doing anything in particular on it, I was really just using it as an excuse. My phone was like my escape from the social aspect of the night. Aaron did the same.
Vic told Sarah stories, most of them were times that I did something really embarrassing because then Vic would seem charming in comparison. I didn't care what Vic said about me, because I didn't care what Sarah thought of me. Odds are that I will never see her again after tonight.
Sarah laughed loudly at his tales. I didn't really like her. I think it was because I was jealous. It wasn't like I was jealous that she was with Vic because I had feelings for him. I was jealous because he was my best friend and I loved him, and honestly, there was this weird part of me that felt I always had to protect him, and in my mind, the only way to do that was to keep him away from anyone that wasn't me. It was fucked.
"Ready to go?" Vic asked me at some point, and thank god because my phone was on the verge of dying.
Just like I didn't want, Aaron came with us, because apparently, Sarah had driven them and he was supposed to stay at her house and it was all just shots that were not in my favor. These things did not effect Vic, because Aaron or not, he was still having sex tonight.
We endured a tragic uber drive back to our apartment where Sarah and Vic made out beside me. Sarah kept hitting me in the arm and the rib with her damn elbow, which only caused me to lean more into Aaron. It was incredibly awkward. I told him I was sorry. He hummed in response. I didn't know if he was rude, or he just didn't care. Either way, i was satisfied with the lack of conversation between the two of us.
When we finally arrived to the apartment, Vic excused us and dragged me away into the kitchen to give me his typical Before-sex-game-plan.
"I'm going to take Sarah to my room," He said, like I expected them to fuck in the bathroom or something.
"Okay."
"You've got Aaron?" He asked.
"Sure." I said even though I'd rather not.
"Okay."
"Vic," I called out before he walked away. "Please don't get her pregnant." He nodded in understanding then floated away.
We both returned to the living room where the two were. Vic collected Sarah and I painfully asked Aaron to join me in my room. My bedroom was just about the plainest bedroom you will ever be in. I just never found the reason to decorate it. I was never even in here anyway. I mostly use it to sleep and like masturbate. Other than that, I was always in the living room or in Vic's room. I didn't touch myself in there, I just like, watched television and stuff.
Aaron came in and looked around, and as a result I wanted to apologize for everything. I wanted to say sorry for the plain walls, the unmade bed, the fact that one of my lightbulbs went out, so it was kind of dim in here. I wanted to excuse Vic for being such a little hoe and pulling his friend so now he is stuck with me.
"Your room's cool," He said.
I smiled and sat on my unmade bed, pulling at the sheets so they could look a little more uniformed. It didn't really do anything though. Aaron sat with me—next to me. My bed was a Full, so he could have given more space between us, but he didn't. I pretended that I didn't notice. I plugged my phone onto the charger, refraining from using it as an escape again. That would be rude.
"Kellin," Aaron spoke beside me. I looked at him and nodded, silently telling him continue. "You're really cute," He spoke.
My chest did this really weird thing when he said those words. It was like the words hit me and my body was like, 'NOPE. REJECT!' My chest hurt and I didn't know what to say.
I didn't have to say anything. Aaron leaned into me before bringing his hand to the back of my neck and brought his lips over mine. Aaron kissed me and I let it happen. I didn't kiss him back, but I didn't pull or push him away either. Aaron caught on to my lack of movement and pulled away himself.
He smiled and even laughed a little. I watched him as he licked his lips, tasting where my lips touched his just moments ago. Just like I wanted to do for the appearance of my room, I wanted to apologize for not being able to give him more to savor. Actually, I did apologize.
"I'm sorry,"
"It's okay. You're not into guys." He assumed.
"That's not true."
"Oh, so you just don't like me." He assumed once again.
"That's not true either. I just don't know you and unlike our currently fucking friends, I don't have relations with people I don't know." I explained and it was all the truth. I did think that Aaron was attractive, but I didn't fuck, kiss, or blow anyone that I don't know, and I don't know Aaron.
Now this is the part where Aaron makes up some excuse to leave, just like most other people who find that I won't sleep with them.
"That's okay." He said, simply. "What do you want to do then?" I couldn't believe it.
"You like anime?" I suggest like the complete loser I am.
"Never seen it." He responds like any other productive adult would. The problem was that I wasn't that. I was an actual trashcan and that was why I watch anime.
"Congratulations, Aaron. You will be watching your first Japanese animation tonight."
I pull out my laptop for the both of us and search up a show for us to watch. While doing this and Aaron looking over my shoulder, I pray to the gods that nothing weird pops up. Its's not that I ever look up said weird things, but I think it's reasonable to fear that the one time you are on your computer with somebody else, that something disturbing will pop up and the other person will think you are a pervert forever. It's a totally valid fear.
Aaron and I lie in my bed, on our stomachs and watch an anime where a god of death follows around a student who thinks he is justice. Don't ask.
The company of Aaron was actually kind of nice. I don't usually go out without Vic and I don't really hang out with other people that aren't Vic. I mean, I had a few acquaintances at work, but other than that I was usually on my own.
Aaron asked lots of questions about the show, which I always answered with 'just keep watching' and then he would go 'oh!' when it would be explained. He was like a child. It was quite cute.
"Uh," I heard Aaron beside me, eventually. I was too enthralled in the show to know what he was 'uh-ing' at. I pulled my eyes from the screen and watched him confused. It was then that I heard what he was hearing, the obnoxious sound of people having sex. Vic and I shared a wall so you could hear everything; every groan, every moan, every time Vic would say 'fuck' and Sarah would gasp 'oh, my god!'.
I thought it was kind of hot and I knew how fucked up that was. I knew that hearing Sarah and Vic having sex was like hearing your sibling or your parents have sex. No one likes to hear their parents fucking. But I was just human and for some reason my body liked this?
"They sound like ghosts, or like...dying cats." Aaron said, and then all my thoughts and imagines shifted and I was no longer finding any of it hot. Instead I began laughing at Aaron's comment, which caused him to smile proudly.
"They really do."
For the rest of the night we listened to the dying cats fuck each other in the next room until they tired themselves out and then silence awkwardly settled around Aaron and I. Vic didn't come into my room that night to tell me that he had completed his mission and that his girl was leaving, which would mean that whoever I was stuck with for the night would leave too. There were very few times where Vic would pass out right after sex, so the girl would end up staying the night. This happened to be one of those nights.
It was nearly 5 am when I realized this. The sun was beginning to show its face and episode 10 was just starting. Aaron's eyes were lazy and I knew he must be as tired as I was now.
"Sleep," I said.
"What?" He asked, not looking away from the screen.
"Let's sleep."
He nodded and dropped his head, letting it rest on my bed. I didn't mean let's sleep here, but I guess he didn't get that. I closed my laptop, put it away, and laid my head down, too. Aaron already had his eyes closed. Mine were open, watching his closed. I thought if I should leave and go to the couch, or if that would be rude. I also thought about why I had to second guess everything, why I had to question if everything I do would be mean or not. Vic says I'm insecure. Vic also watches Oprah and thinks he is an expert in these things.
I ended up falling asleep before I could convince myself to get to the couch, or insure myself that it was okay to stay in bed with Aaron. I have shared this bed with other best friends of people that Vic has had sex with. Most of them were girls and I always had to explain to them that I was gay, and didn't particularly want to have sex with them. Most of them were okay with this, but then would ask me if they could play with my hair, or do my makeup, which fucked me up in ways they would never understand.
Those nights felt like grade-school sleepovers. This one felt similar to that. There was nothing sexual about it, you know, except for when Aaron kissed me. But other than that it was platonic and nice, and I would never be seeing him again.