Dazai Osamu's confidence has no benefits whatsoever.
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The refreshing current of the air rippled the surface of the sparkling water. Inhaling the wet soil, and grass from afar was considerably better than staying in a cramped apartment. A small number of citizens passed by the restful scenery, allowing her to clear her mind without any interruptions. Indeed, this was far better than staying in that apartment all alone. It would've probably caused her to turn insane from her undying boredom.
It was the weekend and the day was slowly ending due to the sun setting. [Name] chose to walk around the city for a bit. It was fair for her to do so, since Dazai was prancing around somewhere doing whatever made him pleased. An aqueduct caught her vision, resulting her to get a closer look from the railing. She guessed that she remained in that spot for a good twenty minutes.
What made [Name]'s talkative side come out was the eventual sight of the brunette that had invaded her view. She glanced from the railing and just watched Dazai view the calm water. She didn't know how long he stood there, but it was certain that he didn't notice her presence since it appeared that he was pondering about something. It was a rare sight to not see Dazai's lips curve upwards and strangely enough, she didn't like it. Much to her dislike, he was just too incomprehensible.
"I was wondering where you were, Dazai!" [Name] shouted, obviously earning his attention as he searched for her figure. A tiny smile instantly revealed itself as his hand made a gesture for her to get closer to him.
Her head nodded at his indication and swiftly walked down the concrete stairs. When she was nearly in front of him, her pace slowed down and peculiarly asked, "What are you doing here?"
"I was just admiring this beautiful view," he coolly answered. Dazai had the option to explain that this aqueduct was the exact place he met the young man-tiger, but he decided not to. He knew all too well that [Name] would've asked more questions regarding Atsushi if he added more words to his answer.
"It's always been beautiful," she said with a hint of amazement in her tone. It was pretty rare for Dazai to normally reply to her. Whenever she asked him something or decided to begin a conversation with him, their discussions would commonly leave her irritated in the end.
"Oh, how wonderful it would be to commit lovers' suicide at a place like this." Dazai placed a hand on his cheek as he exhibited a delighted expression.
[Name] felt her eye twitch and her tongue throbbing from biting herself in frustration. There was no way he would think about anything else but double suicide ever since he met that blonde-haired woman from the Port Mafia. She really did speak too soon.
"Good luck finding a dumbass that's willing to die with you," [Name] snapped as she crossed her arms over her chest. She found it difficult to recall a time where Dazai didn't have a red handprint on his cheek at the end of the day. It was a fact that he was a handsome man with intense eyes contrasting against darkened lashes. It was a shame that his puzzling obsession with suicide was what drove many women away.
He found it unnecessary to begin a committed relationship with any woman who gave him attention. Completely disregarding one and moving on to the other would normally be a daily routine for him within the past couple of years. It would satisfy both ends of the spectrum. He would look into the eyes of a random woman looking for lustful affection, but then he would catch himself remembering the one woman he couldn't look away from even within his memories.
He couldn't stop visualizing how relaxing her intoxicating touch was. He couldn't stop visualizing how her eyes looked at him as if she were waiting for him to just sweep her off her feet. He couldn't stop visualizing her being alone in that small apartment of his as she waited for him to return home safe.
[Name] muttered, "You never get the girl anyway."
Mahogany painted hues wandered to her appearance, amusement overtook his features the second she muttered those words. "Is that a challenge, my dear?"
[Name] could only scoff as an answer and look away from Dazai. She analyzed the tranquilizing area she was in out of her own curiosity. It was then she noticed a boy and girl not too far from them, who didn't seem to be older than ten-years-old.
Tightly wrapped around the girl's hands, it looked like she held a brown instant camera. The younger boy watched her snap photos of the aqueduct as he carefully held onto a pile of photos. Watching those two children impressed [Name], but it was a very limited sight. It was just a miracle that not everyone was addicted to popular electronics.
Dazai eyed the woman next to him and he shortly followed her gaze at the two children. Although [Name] didn't realize it, a look of tenderness was visible on her face. The sight of her affectionately watching those kids made Dazai bitterly remind himself of a particular person, an old friend to be precise. Then again, it shouldn't really matter.
Odasaku was already reunited with his five adopted children.
After a few minutes, [Name] decided to bring her attention back to Dazai, but confusion quickly overwhelmed her. He mysteriously vanished from her side, causing her to call out his name a couple of times. When she frantically searched the whole area, she eventually found him beginning a normal conversation with the two children.
"Dazai?!" She panicked, marching her way to stop him from whatever he was intending to do. [Name] didn't want Dazai to look like a pedophile if a random citizen were to pass by. At least she was generous enough to actually want to protect his pride.
However, no matter how much she tried to humorously pull on his arm, he wouldn't budge. Dazai ignored her protests and continued talking to the baffled children. "This young lady would like to chat with you," he exclaimed with ease.
"What do you think you're doing?" [Name] harshly whispered, hoping her anger wouldn't be frightening to them. Dazai appeared to be untroubled by her panicked state since he provided her a smile filled with confidence. The nerve this man had really did piss her off.
"Helping," he responded.
She let out a long sigh to release her irritation and rubbed her arm to somehow soothe herself. Glancing at the children in front of her, she bent down a bit to seem less intimidating to them. With an unsure expression, she skeptically greeted, "Uh, hi there."
"Hello," the girl quietly greeted as the boy nervously shifted his posture. [Name] noted how similar their characteristics were. They both had black tresses, black irises, and the same pale complexion. Someone would have to be an idiot to not realize they were siblings.
"You two must like photography, huh?" [Name] gave the children a smile, which gave them a sense of sincerity. The siblings looked at each other, unsure whether or not they should continue talking to a complete stranger. Yet, when the young boy glanced at the brunette who stood behind the woman, the man's reassuring smile calmed the boy.
The boy nodded his head, quite shy to utter a word. [Name] softly chuckled at his coyness and inquired, "Why?"
"We want to capture memories so that we can look back at them in the future," the little girl answered with a blush. The siblings looked down at their feet out of embarrassment, truly afraid of what [Name]'s response would be. Would she laugh at them, or would she claim how stupid their idea was?
"That's very smart," she praised, surprising the boy and girl. There hasn't been a single person who thought their idea wasn't wasting their youth. Despite their age, [Name] thought it was honestly impressive.
"Our parents say we're too young to think about the future," the boy said before he let out a forced chuckle. Once again, they expected [Name] to change her mind and criticize them. However, as strange as it may seem, her hands reached out to pat their shoulders. The carefree grin she gave them was all they ever wanted, now giving them a sense of confidence.
Realizing what [Name] just did, her hands quickly retreated back to her sides as she clumsily straightened her posture. A blush crept on her cheeks and apologized for her action. She turned around to look at Dazai's reaction and as expected, he was stupidly grinning at her. Of course, what he just witnessed gave him another reason to tease her.
The siblings were astonished by the adults they just met. Oddly enough, they acted like bickering children. The girl let out a laugh, giving her little brother an expression that showed what she wanted to do next. After all, they were the most unique adults they'd ever met. It would be too sad if those children were to forget about them. "Is it okay if we take a picture of you two?"
Dazai and [Name] exchanged no words for a few seconds until she soon noticed his buoyant aura. He expressed his wonderment by agreeing with their idea. "Of course!"
[Name] couldn't say anything, due to the fact Dazai wrapped his arm around her shoulders as a sign of endearment. She didn't oppose to the idea, but that didn't mean she was slightly nervous at his action. Gulping the lump in her throat, she persuaded herself to remain unflustered and just smile for the damn picture. Little did [Name] realize how her smile widened once the young girl captured the heartwarming photo.
Considering the sun was drastically disappearing, the children thanked and bid their farewells to the two adults. Just as the children walked away from the duo, [Name] relaxed at what she just experienced. Although it was weird for Dazai to confront them, she kind of thanked him. Yes, she was thankful, but she wouldn't dare to say it out loud. His ego doesn't need fueling.
"We should also head back," she advised. [Name] walked away, but when she didn't hear any footsteps follow her, she stopped walking. Her head turned to look at Dazai, only to see him not move from his spot.
"You can go without me," he said, devoid of any telling emotion. Her eyebrows furrowed in turbulence, but he was able to easily convince her.
"I want to watch this view a little longer," he answered. His calm composure didn't cause [Name] to object. Instead, she gave him a quick nod and continued walking to the concrete stairs to get out of the aqueduct. It wasn't that big of an issue since there was no doubt that Dazai would return to her side.
Pleased that she listened to his request, Dazai was able to talk to the children walking not too far from him. It was convenient that [Name] wasn't near him to witness what he was about to ask them. He loved having opportunities to taunt her, and what he was about to do would certainly humiliate her. It was perfect, honestly.
A slight smirk formed on his lips as he followed the siblings' path. When he approached them from a fair distance, he called out, "Pardon me, but would it be rude to ask for that picture?"
They turned around and from the pile of photos that the boy held, he rummaged through it for the picture that the man was asking for. When the boy found what he was looking for, he ran toward Dazai and handed him the photo.
"We're sorry, we never asked if you two wanted to keep it," the boy apologized, but Dazai let out a chuckle. The sound of his chuckle rang through the little boy's sensitive ears.
"There's no need to ask her," Dazai guaranteed. He was captivated by the instant camera that the girl grasped in her hands, causing his expression to soften at the sight.
"If you don't take as many pictures now, there won't be another chance to leave behind evidence that you enjoyed your past," Dazai suggested. It was the truth, nothing but the truth will leave his mouth.
"Wouldn't you agree?" He suddenly asked the siblings, his eyes landing on the picture he held between his thumb and index finger. Every photograph had its own reminiscence and the one he possessed was no exception.
In the photo, they were smiling so happily.
Memo: Dazai Osamu's confidence gives him what he wants.
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Honestly, the only reason I began this book was because of my own curiosity for Dazai's character. I didn't have any intention to start a cheesy romance book, but I could only think of one way Dazai could actually care for someone. That's why the Reader is similar to Oda Sakunosuke. I hope I explained that well without giving any spoilers or boring any of you.
「Edited on December 20, 2019」
「Originally published on August 10, 2016」