12
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Maryland Summer Mascotte
Biting my bottom lip, I shook my head, "Um... No"
"Why not?"
"Because if I tell you mine then you won't tell me yours" I nibbled on the inside of my cheek, "And that's not fair"
Ahren chuckled, "You know me well" His soft grey eyes had a glint of amusement
"I guess so" I rolled my eyes playfully, running my hand through my frizzy hair, "You go first"
"You sure?"
"Mhmm" I smiled, seeing his little grin sadden
He rubbed his hands together as he contemplated about saying something, "Never mind"
"Ahren... Please" I went to touch his shoulder, but he instantly smacked my hand down
A stinging, yet a burning sensation went through my hand. I held it to my chest as I caressed it, looking down at my lap whilst mumbling an apology.
"I'm sorry" He ruffled his hair, "I don't want to talk about it anymore"
"I promise that I won't judge you because I will more than likely understand. I just, I just need to know why you're the way you are" I stated
"Okay" Ahren muttered
My ears were ready to listen, "Okay" I said
"Let me lay my head down before I start" He settled the side of his head on my lap, lightly running his fingers up and down my leg
"You're stalling, Ahren"
He sighed, "So when I was kid I would love to hang around people. Didn't matter who they were, I would talk and have fun with them. My parents would watch my brother and I as we conversed to others. So when they took Orlyndo upstairs, I went downstairs to wait. The more I waited, the more scared I became.
I would get whipped and tortured by father just for talking or for his satisfaction. It lasted for hours. But I noticed that he didn't do the same to Orlyndo, he would only beat him and mess with his mind mentally. My abuse was physical which is something different.
That's the reason why I don't let you or anybody in general touch me- I'll lose my temper. It bothers me to the point where I can't hug anyone because it burns. Till this day it still burns"
I felt droplets trickling down my thigh. As much as I wanted to rub his back to comfort him, I knew couldn't.
"It hurts to know that my own parents would do something like that to me, their child. A kid who never knew what he did or why he was being treated that way. The shit they did to my brother caused him to hate me, only because Orlyndo thought I wasn't getting beaten when in reality I was"
Honestly, I'm speechless. My tiny secret literally means nothing and right now, it's not important. I didn't care about it anymore, I care about the guy who's crying on my lap.
What came out my mouth was the only thing I could think of, "I'm so sorry, Ahren. I didn't know"
"I didn't want you to know"
"Why is that?"
"Because I would feel embarrassed"
I frowned, "Do you?"
"Yes" He hoarsely spoke
My clammy hands had nowhere to be placed, so I laid them on the cushions, "Don't be... A-Are the scars still visible?"
"Yes"
"Can I see them?"
"No"
"But I showed you my body that I'm not comfortable with. We're talking about this because we need to step out our comfort zone and need to get to know one another"
"I don't like it when you're right, babe"
Heat tingled my cheeks, "Feeling's mutual"
Ahren stood up and I did as well. Seeing him take off his shirt, he tossed it on the floor and gradually turned around to let me get a view of his back. My eyes immediately widened, my hand covering my mouth.
I looked at the one that's bleeding, "This one is um... Fresh" I mentioned
"It was itching earlier"
"Oh" I tucked my lips in, wanting to trace my fingers on them- so I did
Ahren hissed and quickly faced me, roughly pushing me back onto the couch. My breathing quickened, my chest heaving up and down as he trapped me against the cushions. He sighed, his head lowering in regret.
"Stop" I told him, "Don't look like that, okay? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to touch you"
He nodded and straightened his posture, going over to get his shirt to put it back on. Carefully, Ahren sat beside me.
"Go ahead" He spoke
"Heh?"
"I told you my secret, now it's your turn"
"Oh right. My secret. That. I forgot-"
"Maryland"
"Okay, okay. I have infertility"
His eyebrows furrowed together, "What is that?"
"It's when a woman has a disease of the reproductive system- defined by the failure to achieve a clinical pregnancy after 12 months or more of regular, unprotected sexual intercourse"
"How long have you had this?"
"Three years"
He seemed very intrigued, too much for my liking, "Tell me the story"
I sighed while fiddling with my fingers, "My boyfriend- at the time- and I had sex a few times that was unprotected, and we went to the doctors to see if I was pregnant. They told me that my reproductive system was messed up and that I couldn't get pregnant no matter how hard I tried.
But I didn't want to believe it. So my boyfriend and I continued to try again and again, but it was no use... And because of that, he left me and told me to just kill myself because of how my body is so fucked up"
Glancing over at Ahren, his now cold blue eyes pierced right back into my soft gaze. I ran my hand through my hair, tears going over the brim of my lower eyelids.
"I want a child of my own, I really do. But it sucks to know that I can't. What actually hurts the most is the guy I was so in love with told me to kill myself because I couldn't give birth to a baby he wanted" I shook my head and twisted my lips, "Oh well"
"Don't say that, Maryland" He held my hand
I looked at him, "Say what?"
"Oh well. Seems like you don't give a damn about the disease"
"Trust me, I do. I really do, but it's pretty shitty that my body isn't as natural as I want it to be"
"You have body parts, you have a brain that functions, you have flesh and blood, and much more"
"But do I have a working reproductive system that can soon make me give birth to a newborn?"
"No, but you're still natural. You're still human- you breathe, walk, talk like one. Just because something that you have that millions of others do as well, doesn't mean you're not natural. Think about it"
"I-I don't want to talk about it anymore, okay?" I mumbled, taking my hand away from his
I got up to go down the hallway, "Maryland" Ahren trailed behind from afar, "Maryland!"
Going inside a room, I hurried to shut the door and locked it. The door slightly shook as Ahren knocked.
"Open the door"
I looked around the space I'm in- a regular bedroom. Sauntering over to the bed, I went to get under the covers and snuggled myself to sleep.
☼☼☼☼
"You disgust me, you know that?" The person snarled, slapping gray tape on my mouth
My vision became blurry as I stared at the man's face that was censored. Tears ran down my cheeks, a hand dragging me through the brown grass. I mumbled yells for him to let me go whilst kicking my deadweight legs.
Coming face to face with water that was a darker color of the grass, the man kissed my temple.
"Have a good swim down" A deep voice whispered in my ear, throwing me into the lake
Trying to pull my hands out the knotted rope, I muffled screams under the duct tape that's stuck upon my mouth. I forced to swim up, yet the heavy weights that's tied to my ankles were pulling me down.
Once upon a time not long ago, I was hoe.
I instantly sat up, looking over at a phone that had it's alarm going off. I slid the touch screen to turn it off, my back soon connecting with the sheets one more.
"Oh my God" I exhaled sharply, picking up the cell "Who's phone is this anyway?"
Examining it, I pressed the home button and it unlocked. Letting out a weird noise, I realized that I set the alarm in the middle of the night before going to sleep again- for no reason.
"I'm really hungry. Pft, I can eat" I got out the bed
My feet landed on the carpeted floor, walking towards the door- I screamed at the girl who walked past the big mirror. Calming down, I noticed that it was only me.
I opened the door and saw Ahren sleeping out in the hall. I let out a soft giggle as I stepped over him.
Making my way to the kitchen, I scanned it and began to take out some food to cook. I was in the mood to prep up some eggs, bacon, and pancakes. Simple, just simple.
"A whole new world! A dazzling place I never knew. But when I'm way up here, it's crystal clear. That now I'm in a whole new world with you! Now I'm in a whole new world with you!" I sang, flipping the pancakes
"Unbelievable sights. Indescribable feeling. Soaring, tumbling, freewheeling. Through an endless diamond sky" I felt a kiss plant on top of my shoulder
Asdfghjkl! Oh my God! My heart.
I bashfully blushed, "Good morning, Ahren" I greeted him
"Good morning, babe" He pecked my lips, caressing up and down my sides
"You have a nice singing voice" I mentioned genuinely
"Mm, and you do too"
Ahren helped me cook the rest of the breakfast. Soon, we were sitting at the kitchen island while eating our food. I drank my orange juice, the both of us piercing our gazes at one another. The cup left my mouth, my tongue grazing over my lips swiftly. His parted, his eyes changing back to it's original grey color.
He looked down and took a forkful of his eggs, "Better be happy"
I raised an eyebrow, "Of?" I inquired, seeing him settle his elbow on the surface
"Me being tired as hell" He took a sip of his coffee, "Because I would be fucking the shit out of you on this table"