Encountering Dazai Osamu was ordinary.
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An enigma was comparable to a puzzle that tested a persons knowledge. Pieces would effortlessly adjust together, whilst others became misplaced in a disordered manner. The puzzle would be so close to becoming solved, but it could never reach its conclusion.
Dazai Osamu's former profession was one of the seven enigmas of the Armed Detective Agency. Whoever predicted it accurately would obtain a suitable reward that didn't fail to entice greedy desires. His past was a dark cloud that never dispersed, much to Atsushi Nakajima's discontent. His guesses were deemed incorrect no matter the list of professions he presented to the bandaged abomination. Despite his errors, he discovered the one member who happened to be familiar with Dazai before he became affiliated with the Agency.
"Uh, [Name]?" Atsushi timidly approached the young woman, causing her fingers to halt from pressing the engraved buttons of the black keyboard. [Name] hummed as a momentary response and swiveled her chair to direct her utmost attention toward him. Her gaze flickered from the computer to the young man in front of her and her eyebrow arched. A smile slowly formed on the contours of her lips because of his welcoming appearance.
The brightness in his multicolored eyes conveyed that he was exhilarated at the given moment. Before he approached her, he wanted to confirm with Kunikida if she really was the one woman to know Dazai the longest. The awaiting confirmation didn't take too much thought when he threatened Atsushi to never mention the bandaged maniac when he was invested piling himself with paperwork.
With a demeanor visible of anxiousness, he hastily questioned, "I don't mean to pry or anything, but is it true that you met Dazai a couple years ago? Before he joined the Armed Detective Agency?"
"You still want that seven hundred grand, don't you?" She sent a quick and playful grin to the young man. She chuckled at his perseverance, which resulted his complexion to furiously turn red from shame and humiliation. The question that spilled from her mouth made him feel utterly vulnerable.
"It's true, but you're out of luck. Even if I'm the one who knew him the longest, I could never figure it out," [Name] responded sympathetically. She admittedly wanted to help Atsushi, more so to prove to that suicidal bastard that he wasn't as cryptic as he made himself out to be. There have been times in the past and present she attempted to ask Dazai about his former profession. She didn't get much of an answer when all he did was tease how they should first go out on a date before they exchanged confidential information.
Atsushi let out a defeated sigh, discouragement evident within his eyes. The moment he thought all hope was lost, an idea occurred to his mind just as fast. Perhaps, if [Name] presented the history between her and Dazai, there could be clues he could identify. Grasping any detail such as clothing, behavior, and certain words used in dialogue could probably be important in order to solve this puzzle. There was still hope for the penniless youth.
"[Name], please tell me how you met him," Atsushi eagerly requested. Something flickered within his pair of unique colored eyes. She was in a situation that was almost considered unavoidable because he looked like a child waiting for an adventurous bedtime story.
It wasn't like she minded him interrupting her work. She was grateful his sudden appearance eased her fingers from cramping every second she typed. His presence was never a bother to her, especially when he was one of the few people she cared about. Atsushi joining the Agency was one of the many abrupt decisions she didn't consider horrible. She was sort of grateful Dazai brought in an orphan who had potential proving himself to be special. She even found innocent amusement by teasing him a bit since he always had a difficult time defending himself.
"Can you guess what I did when I was about your age? If you're right, then I'll tell you everything that I know about Dazai," she humorously challenged. She would end up telling him the story regardless if his answer was right or wrong. However, she was genuinely interested how the young man viewed her. As a woman in her early twenties, there have been different paths she took in order to explore what she preferred in life. She anticipated that he wouldn't see her as being a reckless teenager contemplating selling her body, but the thought of it hopefully didn't end up being the answer coming out of his mouth.
Atsushi was quite the analytical teenager despite not growing up with proper education. He studied the woman's overall appearance as his eyes narrowed in focus. Their age difference wasn't drastic as she was still a young, beautiful woman. She wore a professional attire that consisted of a white buttoned shirt and a long navy blue skirt, similar to the rest of the clerks in the Agency.
She was never the one to initiate a conversation unless it was necessary but when she did, she radiated such a motherly aura that almost anyone would feel comfortable being with her. There was something about the way she looked at a person that seemed as if that expression could suit so few. He would often catch himself comparing her to the dim yet, mesmerizing stars that no one could keep their eyes off of when looking at the sky.
His face unfortunately morphed into a look of uncertainty. He was hesitant to answer because he couldn't decipher what kind of job looked compatible with her. It wasn't an obvious interpretation unlike the rest of the members. He could only guess what regular teenagers would consider generally having as their first job. "Were you a waiter or did you work in retail?"
"I was a barmaid for my first job. Now, don't think that I aspired to become an alcoholic." She sheepishly rubbed the back of her neck. Teenagers would often explore more than one job and of course, she was one of them. His simple prediction nevertheless astounded her how perspective the young man can be. It was one of the many qualities about him that impressed her.
Complimenting him in her thoughts didn't change the everlasting irritation by the mention of Dazai Osamu. It wasn't like she wanted to rudely disregard the history between them completely, but her tolerance was wearing thin whenever his name was acknowledged. She had every right to spout insults about him but at the end of the day, she caught herself admitting that he was certainly one of a kind and finding another person like him would be almost impossible. She didn't want to find another person similar to him if it wasn't him.
"The pub I worked at was where I met him," [Name] began, already feeling exhausted from the remembrance that occurred four years ago.
The days were longer and the rays of the sun reawakened from its recluse. Spring was the time of a phenomenal renewal filled with light, joviality, and leisure. It was the perfect season for any youngster to just not have a care in the world. Running amok without any complaints and responsibilities truly gave a sense of freedom.
That wasn't the case for everyone who desired that. The seventeen-year-old girl was on the search for a decent job as she was preparing herself for the harsh life of adulthood. Though it took an exhausting month of endless interviews, she was able to get accepted at a local pub. It was a reasonably easy job since all she had to do was serve the drinks as she wasn't allowed to open the bottles due to age restrictions. She planned to quit when she had enough money to pay for an apartment in the future.
[Name] became adjusted to the new surroundings in a matter of just a few weeks. The pub wasn't too rowdy, she became acquainted with the head bartender, the customers were typically friendly, and the job paid fairly well. Nothing seemed to go wrong nor did any of her decisions lead her down a destructive path.
However, on a particular day, the head bartender appeared to be overly friendly with a particular customer. It was hard to tell if the tone of his voice sounded forced due to fear, irritation, or pure elation. Although she was intrigued with who he could possibly be talking to, she was too busy serving the customers to bother him. When most of the customers began to disperse, her acquaintance called her over to introduce her to the stranger. Her shoulders stiffened by the sudden shout of her name. She timed her slow footsteps approaching them, hoping that she could quickly avoid engaging with the stranger.
[Name] was slightly unsettled by the stranger's appearance. The young man wore a dark trench coat over his suit with bandages wrapped around his neck and forearms. Another bandage was also covering his right eye, which took up most of his features. His wavy hair framed his face quite perfectly as she seemingly caught herself from complimenting that he was a charming man.
What unnerved her the most was that the look in his eyes did not match the smile he displayed to people. His hues were so dark it seemed as if light wouldn't dare step within those eyes. What she saw in front of her was an entity that didn't have a place in the world. There was a gnawing sensation in the pit of her stomach, indicating that something about this stranger was not morally right.
"I want you to meet the pub's newest employee," the bartender politely introduced. The moment the both of them at looked each other, the smile she presumed to hold no actual meaning, grew from ear to ear. It was the first time she questioned if the feeling of fingers uncomfortably trailing down her spine was just her imagination.
"I'm [Name]." A self-conscious grin formed on her lips.
With his smile never once faltering, he replied, "I'm Dazai Osamu."
A customer's gruff voice demanded another drink before the bartender could spout a single word. He politely excused himself in order to make the drink to avoid angering the customer for poor customer service. [Name] watched him leave, failing to notice Dazai's inspection of her appearance.
He thought of her as nothing more than an average girl who he probably wouldn't have trouble swaying with sweet, empty compliments. He told himself she probably wasn't worth messing around with as there were other easy women seemingly worth his time. Despite these thoughts, he caught himself observing her eyes longer than he intended to. She possessed a pair of [e/c] eyes that seemingly appeared as if she were daydreaming. They wondered and wondered, desiring to uncover many truths hidden from society in such a poised way. How strange, this girl was very strange. Perhaps, he could have some fun with her?
When she brought her attention back to Dazai and realized his continuous stare, she inquired, "Yes?"
"I think I'll nickname you Delilah."
Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion, wondering why he thought it would be appropriate to call her that. "Why?"
It took him awhile to show any sign of reaction, but when he did, Dazai displayed his usual smile as he cocked his head to the side. Though bizarre in ways that most people wouldn't understand, it was his way of showing fascination. At that moment, [Name] already predicted that he was a very unfathomable person.
"Because it suits you."
That was her first time meeting Dazai Osamu. Even before she began working at the pub, he was a regular customer that the head bartender seemed to favor. There were times when Dazai wouldn't visit the pub for weeks, which explained why she didn't meet him during her first week of working.
Though, when he did visit, [Name] assumed he would entertain himself by teasing how such a beautiful woman such as herself would be quite the pleasure to flirt with. He would also childishly complain how she should only pay attention to him as the rest of the other customers were too fucked up to hold a proper conversation. She speculated he wasn't of any harm despite being such an annoyance. He was a carefree man that gloated about his bizarre fascination with suicide, but she could barely grasp what kind of person he truly was.
Almost a year had passed and she finally had enough money to rent a decent apartment that was a bit distant from the pub. She had no choice but to quit considering it would be too much of a hassle commuting back and forth. When she did quit, Dazai didn't visit the pub on her last day. Whether she was disappointed or relieved was up to anyone's interpretation.
He couldn't fathom how bitter he felt without her when she was just supposed to be a way to pass time. That was all she was meant to be from the beginning.
Three years had passed and [Name] had left a couple of jobs. It may have seemed like a pain, but she did it for a reason that was common for anyone searching for their desired future. She needed money to pay for her needs, but she wanted to find a job that she was truly happy with. It took time but if it was for her satisfaction, she didn't care at all.
Fortunately, she became employed at the Armed Detective Agency as a clerk. Despite not having an ability, her patience and talent of speculation were acknowledged by Yukichi Fukuzawa. It paid well, but she was eager to work with the members who possessed unique abilities. She felt ecstatic and even nervous for the upcoming events when she was introduced to the members. Her excitement ended shortly when she heard a familiar voice among the crowd of members.
"Could it be that [Name] couldn't stand being away from me?"
In front of her, there stood the one and only Dazai Osamu. Four years have passed, but his personality didn't change at all. The bandages remained on his neck and forearms, but his right eye was finally uncovered. She remembered the color of his eyes being much darker, but they were now glimmering underneath the interior lights. His appearance may have slightly changed, but his behavior toward her remained the same.
"Is it too late to quit?" She muttered as her confidence diminished.
However, her lips formed a small smile. Again, whether she was disappointed or relieved was up to anyone's interpretation.
"That's how I met Dazai. Did that help you in any way?"
"No."
Poor Atsushi couldn't grasp any useful hints. Knowing Dazai's previous appearance didn't help, nor did his personality since it remained the same. Atsushi slumped to the floor, finally admitting defeat. Dazai was just someone nobody could figure out.
"I'm sorry, Atsushi," [Name] wholeheartedly apologized. She felt awful for not being able to support her friend, but there wasn't much she could've done. Just like Atsushi, she also wanted to know more about that secretive man. His true intentions were never revealed unless he revealed them.
"I hope I explained the story well," she said to herself. Perhaps she missed an important detail in her story? If she did, that would probably be the reason why Atsushi couldn't guess Dazai's former profession.
All of a sudden, the office's door opened with a loud slam, startling her and Atsushi. The both of them forced their necks to look at the person near them as sweat dripped from their forehead by the sight of the known member.
"You explained it very well, my dear Delilah!"
There he stood, the eccentric man known as Dazai Osamu. He looked at [Name] in amazement, completely honored by the story of their first meeting. If only she could forget about that assertive smirk of his as if he was always the center of attention.
"Were you eavesdropping?" She sighed and rubbed the temples of her head. In all honesty, it wasn't much of a surprise that Dazai would eavesdrop since not a single soul could hide anything from him.
"[Name], you make it sound like eavesdropping is a bad thing."
"I didn't consider it bad until you showed up."
He let out an exaggerated cry of anguish like he was stabbed in his heart by her sarcastic words. He gracefully landed a hand on his chest and pretended to be hurt. But soon after, his permanent smirk was displayed on his lips. Dazai stared down at [Name], causing her to feel like an imbecile underneath his impish eyes.
"I would've felt hurt if it weren't for your flattering description of me."
Memo: Encountering Dazai Osamu was never ordinary.
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Delilah ; she who weakened, the woman in the valley of Sorek whom Samson loved, and who was his downfall.
If your name is already Delilah, then you're very lucky.
「Rewritten on December 16, 2019」
「Originally published on July 3, 2016」