Jared
I knew I couldn't hate her anymore. Specially, after the club incident. Allison wasn't what I had perceived. It was as if she had opened another facet of her. The girl I knew was a bit shy when it came to other people and usually timid but she still surprised me. Like tonight, I had no idea she had a hidden Bruce Lee inside her. I never thought she was the type of girl to kick a guy in his groin because despite what people said, it took guts.
I knew I had to let go of the past. I wouldn't mix it with the present. From today onwards, I was really going to move on. Allison was wonderful at her job. I couldn't scold her for illogical reasons. Plus, if we were gonna work together for two years provided I didn't fire her (which I wouldn't) we had to maintain a good rapport.
This whole getting back at her had ultimately backfired on me. I didn't want revenge anymore. I didn't want to torture or pick at her. I was more at peace and calm now.
I didn't know why I did the whole friends part though...
You can be anything but friends with her, my inner voice said.
No, I argued.
Oh, please, you still haven't got over her...
I have a lot.
Yeah? She was there somewhere always. You might have hidden that part away but you never completely forgot her. It was first love after all.
No...no...
You still feel for her... you always felt for her. You know you never stopped loving her.
I don't.
Yes, you do.
"Shut up," I said.
"Um... I wasn't speaking," Allison said.
"Oh, sorry. I wasn't speaking to you. I was speaking to myself," I said, clearing my throat and shifting in my seat.
"Oh, okay," She nodded, "You tend to do that a lot?"
"Yes. I am my own best friend and opposition."
"Got that."
The outside air was cold as we drove away. I had opened the windows and the streets were half empty now. There was a comfortable silence lurking between us as the presentation hovered behind my head. I turned towards Allison after a while. She was staring outside peacefully as she had a hand under her chin and a wry smile on her face. She turned and looked at me to find me staring. I shook my head and smiled back. Her eyes twinkled as she gave a grin.
Damn. I swear my heartbeat doubled its rate. Those eyes, man. I never really found eyes so appealing before I met her and even after her, I never found that pull again.
"Allison? Can I ask you to do something. If only you permit," I said hastily, changing the topic. I had been dying to ask it since the day I met her again.
"What?"
"Um... actually leave it. Its kinda stupid and weird," I shook my head.
"No, you can say it," She argued.
"Nah... leave it," I shrugged it off.
"I don't like when people do that. If you didn't want to say, why did you start speaking in the first place?" She pouted.
She looked so adorable in that stupid facial expression too. Well, it seemed I had no problem when she did it compared to the other girls who did it. I hated pouting in general.
It seemed the five years lost between us never even existed.
Turn your face Jared. Turn your face. The monster inside you will again wake up from its slumber.
"Please," She batted her eyelashes.
I hated when girls did that, but I didn't mind when Allison did it. She looked cute. I think she would even look cute even if she twisted her face.
Oh shit, here we go again. I felt like the younger version of me going through that entire process repeatedly.
"Um..."
"Won't you say?" She did a puppy face.
Man, I was so whipped again. It wasn't even a question anymore.
"Can you please open your lens? I want to see if your eyes are still that gorgeous sea green or not. I loved your eyes, I still do. They were my favourite color. I m-mean.... they will be... but... um... you normally hide it behind those powerful glasses or lens. So, I didn't get a chance to see them just bare face," I blurted out.
Fuck, it sounded so weird and creepy.
Allison looked at me as if I was a retard. Then she shrugged, "I can't do that. Its a bit problematic. I can show you if you come by my apartment someday or at office tomorrow."
"Let's do it now. I don't have anything else to do. Home is boring for me," I provided.
Arrghh! That sounded so desperate. I was but she didn't need to know that. She already thought I was a monster.
"Are you sure?" She asked, looking surprised.
"Positive," I grinned stupidly. Cue the slap.
"Okay," She mumbled, giving a faint smile.
~¤~
"Come in," She opened the lock, "Welcome to my humble abode."
It was a medium sized apartment with two bedrooms, a kitchen and two small washrooms. The living room was quite comfortably big by the space it took. It must have a high rent because houses like these were hard to get in our city. Not that Allison got less salary. I assumed Wade made few bucks too from his job.
"Its not as large as your penthouse, I am afraid," She said nervously, keeping her bag inside her room as I moved forward.
"Its perfect," I said, sitting on the couch. She went inside the kitchen and asked me if I needed water. I nodded.
I decided to ask about her best friend, "So, since Wade and you live here together.... you guys... um... get wasted often?" I casually asked.
"Seldom," She replied, handing me a glass of water.
"Oh, I see."
"But sometimes, when I am asleep, he has to carry me to the bedroom and he often complains how heavy I am for an average sized girl," She laughed, shaking her head, "Though I was always a bit chubbier than Alice."
I choked and coughed out splattering water everywhere.
"Oh my god. You alright?" She rubbed my back. Her hand felt good against my back. She was also very near to me. I felt the urge to continue coughing as she patted my back.
"You... he... carries you till your bedroom?" I coughed, feeling horrorstruck.
"Yeah, sometimes. Why?" She asked.
"N-nothing. Absolutely fine," I shook my head.
I had never felt more jealous of a guy before who was just a friend to her and who had never been my girlfriend officially.
"So, wait here. I will go change now. You can help yourself from the fridge if you want," She went in.
I needed to distract myself. I looked around. There were photos of Allison's family and a guy's family, most probably Wade's. I paused in front of his picture. Well, he was good looking, girls might like him. Rotten luck for me.
I got up and examined the photos closely. She looked so happy and vibrant in them. Since, I had returned I had only seen her scowling or expressionless, if you exclude these few past days.
All my fault again, I admit. I roamed around a bit, looking around the nice furnished apartment. They had decorated it nicely and there were loads of photos of just her and Wade. They looked happy together with making weird faces and having identical grins too.
She had moved on...
"Alright, I am done," Allison came out in her pajamas and an oversized loose top with her glasses.
Now she looked like the Allison I met everyday. I had once seen her long before in pajamas but now, she looked so homely and just your average girl next door.
I loved it.
She opened her glasses slowly and stared at me, not looking directly at me. She might be feeling weird about this suspicious request but I really wanted this since the day I had met her.
Yup.
Her eyes were still those beautiful sea green color which I had once fallen in love with. They were so beautiful. It stood out, making her facial features more enhanced in the light and up close.
"They are really the same beautiful color," I whispered.
"Its a really weird request, you know. I would have considered it creepy if it weren't you," She said.
"Yeah?" I asked, staring at her eyes and not really hearing what she said. It wasn't like I had never seen green eyes before, but there was something about hers which I never seemed to pinpoint. I had met few people with green eyes but Allison's ones always drew me. Those were in the literal sense of the term, mesmerising.
Jared, you are officially gone.
"I guess I will go then. Thanks for hearing out my request," I trailed off, looking away. Reluctantly, I turned to go back home. It was an empty house, not even a home.
Was it time for me to leave already? This was over too quickly. I wanted to stay here for a while longer. I wouldn't get opportunities like this again.
"Okay, I will leave," I said, walking towards the door.
Please stop me, Allison. I didn't want to go yet. Just say anything and I would stop.
"Hey, you wanna eat something? We didn't have dinner at the party so..." She called just as I was about to go down the stairs.
I had a presentation to do tomorrow. I had a presentation to do tomorrow. I had a presentation to do tomorrow.
My face broke into a grin and I turned.
"Yes. I am really hungry actually. Can you make pancakes?"