Hey amazing poeple. I hope you enjoy.
Against the wind
We were runnin' against the wind
We were young and strong, we were runnin'
Against the wind
After what happened your first instinct was to leave and never look back. You walked back to the motel room uninterested in what had happened. Have you ever had that? Unable to care about anything anymore because you've been hurt so many times that it feels unreal just a shock to the body or a blur. That's exactly how you felt.
You paused for a second when you heard your phone, you checked and it was a text from Dean wanting you to meet him at the coordinates he had sent and the fact he found Sam which made you relieved. You walked into the motel room to pack. "Jamie, what happened?" Danica asked concerned.
"Everything is over but right now, I need to leave." you finished packing your duffel bag in a rush, not a single thought about anything just the fact you wanted the boys to know that you were there for them and you wanted to be there when they needed you. Before you left you wrapped both arms around Danica with the smile of hope.
"Give me a call?" she queried. You smiled and placed the duffel bag over your shoulders, forgetting about everything. "Sure maybe we can meet up and you could bring Gracie." you smiled before walking out.
It felt good to be on the road, listening to some Bob Seger with your hands clutched around the steering wheel anxious and over whelmed which kinda felt weird since you haven't felt that way in a long time. The coordinates led you to an old abandoned warehouse which gave you the creeps and the hair at the back of your neck stood up as you exited the car.
Dean had his back against the car with his arms crossed as if he had been waiting a while; he moved from the car and walked over to you as his green majestic eyes glimmered from the reflection of the full moon. He was pleased to see you by the way he looked at you when the corner of his mouth lifted and a smirk appeared which gave you the urge to smile but you could see right through him... the pain.
"I thought you wouldn't have come." he said surprised. You walked closer towards him while you shrugged your shoulders with a smile, you wrapped both arms around his neck while standing on your toes, and you pulled away and your hands dropped to his arms. "It's going to be okay?" you said assuring, able to see his pain and grief. He looked down to the ground trying to conceal his tears. "Yeah well we should go inside. Cas must be waiting."
The rusted door creaked open as it echoed throughout the hallway and you took each step cautiously with the sound of dripping pipes drop unsynchronized. Dean led the way down the stairs.
Sam sat in the chair chained down with a black guard under his chin, your knees started to tremble as soon as you had seen him, it hurt and a lump in your throat appeared when a tear ran down your face. "Sam?" you said in disbelief unable to talk or question what was happening, he was out cold. Crowley and Cas turned around bewildered.
"Let me guess, Dean. You invited the skank. When will you Winchester's learn?" Crowley asked himself with a sigh, you were ready to rip his head off but you knew being calm was your best option. "Oh, look it's the king of hell..." you trailed off in front of him without fear because even though you could see how he actually looked, he didn't scare you. "Wait... isn't the king of hell suppose to be a leader and of course... EVIL? I think you are having a hard time figuring that one out too." you said with a smirk upon your face.
He was unable to answer as if he was hurt at your come back, you walked off not phased and leaned against the wall waiting for Sam to wake up. Dean paced a little inpatient while Cas observed. Sam woke up with a struggle.
"Welcome to the party, pal. Cas, how we lookin'?" Dean asked, you moved from the wall a little and moved closer towards where Dean and Cas were standing. "Most of Sam's internal burns have healed. I should be able to fix the rest." Cas said but all you cared about was finding out who even though you knew but still, you believed in finding it out for yourself and before even going over on what to say you just asked. "What's your name?'", he looked at you with pity and that numb look he gave you made you feel anxious.
"Why would I tell you anything?" he answered without emotion. Dean moved closer with anger. "Well, I don't give a damn who you are... You need to get out - Now!" Dean snapped with rage, knowing that he would do anything for Sam even if it's giving up his own life because you would do the same for Lucas in a blink of an eye.
Voices started crowding your thoughts, they sounded like sirens going off as you clutched your head but you managed to bring it down to whispers. "And if I don't?" he questioned. Dean glanced over to you concerned but you managed to smile assuring, you tried to seem positive not wanting anyone to know what's going on.
You needed some fresh air as you walked past the boys, Castiel's eyes trailed on you while you walked out. It was hard to see someone close to you go through with this. Some part of you felt as if it was your fault and you hated yourself for it, you felt sick to your stomach.
The fresh air upon your skin made you feel alive but it hurt to swallow, even trying to breathe in the fresh air only made the lump in your throat re-appear. "You son of a bitch. You killed Kevin, you took Castiel's grace and I damn well know you are listening to me Metatron, now get your ass down here because I know I am the one you want." you shouted hoping Metatron would listen to you.
It hurt to even think about what happened to the people you cared about. You were ready for Metatron, you didn't give a crap anymore even if it's making a deal. With a blink of an eye you were standing in an alley, it drizzled slightly but it was very tranquil.
Metatron stood in front of you with the look of anger. "Let's get one thing straight, I have better things to do then listening to someone who doesn't obey my orders." he said raising his voice but it didn't frighten you at all, to you he seemed like some scrawny old man who has nothing better to do with his life.
"What is the grace doing to me? I thought I would be strong but instead I feel weak and tired." it was unusual. Metatron was keeping something from you from the minute he injected you with the grace, it was written all over his face and you were not in the mood. "You are not as strong as I thought; all you are now is some abomination... A mistake." he said numb.
It made you anxious and uncontrollable; no one would ever call you that without getting their head ripped off. It hurt to realise you basically were nothing just another mistake. The rage built up inside of you, you kept the anger in and tried not to use your powers because it just made you weak but no more. You focused on Metatron and flicked your hand, he was knocked against the wall which was surprising and you clenched your fists tight as he gasped for air but it only made you nauseous and you let go of your clench. He smiled pleased but you were frustrated.
He stood up dusting his jacket off. He walked closer to you without even gesturing his hands you were on your knees gasping for air; you could barely swallow from the tight grip. "I was the one who made you the way you are, I suggest you grow up and maybe for once follow my orders. I can easily kill you." he said while clenching tighter on the last words that exited his mouth but you weren't phased at his threat.
You tried to get out of his grip by flinging him against the wall but he was too strong. "You are nothing but a half wit who calls himself the scribe of God, you father must be so proud." you said sarcastic. He walked over towards you; he lifted you off the ground with his hands this time and threw you against the hard wall.
Your head started to throb and your vision went blurry. Everything started to spin. "I'll see you soon." he mentioned before zapping you back to the warehouse. You never understood what he meant but you shook it off and tried to stand up. You placed your finger gently against the back of your head; you felt the blood upon your hair.
"Dammit." you mumbled. Walking back to have heard a reflected sound that moved through the air, suffering screams of pure pain that passed through your ears, as a strong feeling of anxiety and fear washed over you.
Crowley stuck the needle into Sam's temple and started to move around as he screamed in pain. You noticed Dean had a hard time dealing with Sam's body being tortured. He soon walked off and Cas followed worried about Dean. Unable to move, frozen in pain from what you are witnessing even though it was an angel, it was still Sam. Many emotions crowded your thoughts but couldn't bear to watch anymore as you trailed off to find Cas and Dean. They were talking. "You want to talk about me now?" Cas questions surprised.
"I want to talk about anything that's not a demon sticking needles into my brother's brain." he said as his voice crackled with emotion, a lump in your throat re - appeared from the sorrow of seeing Dean like that, you wiped your tears. Dean turned around to look out the window to control his emotions. "Yeah humour me, man. How you doing?" Dean asked again while wiping the pool of tears in his eyes.
There was a moment of silence as you moved closer hoping they wouldn't see you. "Uh.. I'm okay." Cas replied.
"Good. Good. That's uh..." Dean turned around and soon stopped as he saw you standing there. You smiled feeling like an idiot dropping in on a conversation like that as you smiled embarrassed. "I'm sorry... I just, uh... I had to get away." you crocked with emotion. Dean quickly wiped his visible tears that pooled around his eyes and smiled a little. "Yeah." Dean answered gazing down at the floor once again not wanting to be seen with tears in his eyes as it hurt to see him go through it, he looked back out the window.
"I'm going to check on Crowley's progress." Cas said breaking the tension and awkwardness but it felt even more weird once he had left, you didn't want Cas to go. "Jamie, how's the mojo going? Still kicking ass?" he asked trying to make conversation. To try and answer was hard since nothing would come out your mouth, it hurt and all you could do was make some strange anxiety noise.
Dean turned around concerned at why you hadn't answered yet. You placed your finger on the back of your head again as you moved your finger to look, there was still blood. Dean moved closer looking at your hand. "What the hell happened, Jamie?" Dean asked worried.
He moved behind you to check at your wounded head which still ached like a throbbing head ache that wouldn't go away. "You bleeding." Dean said bewildered.
"Yeah but I'm okay. I knocked it on the pole coming in." you answered assuring but you knew that it might take a while to heal since you were too weak. Dean didn't believe you by the look he was giving you. Dean placed his hand upon your chin, scanning the cuts worried. You both had that moment where you stared into each other's eyes, you felt at peace whenever you looked into his tranquil green eyes.
"Cher, Sonny, get in here." Crowley called and you took your gaze from Dean and looked down. "I have a first aid kit in my car." he said while handing you the keys to his most precious thing which kinda made you feel trustworthy but you didn't want to leave them, you wanted to be there for Dean but he had that insisting eyes.
It felt weird to go outside once again; you were worried someone was outside waiting for you. You had a feeling in your gut that gave you second thoughts about even going outside alone. You walked wary towards the car with the keys clutched tight.
You opened the trunk of the car to see the first aid kit but beside it was your old phone thrown aside, isolated you knew it was yours because of the cracked screen. Without hesitating you switched it on and noticed a few voice messages that hadn't been read. He must have kept it charged.
'Dean must have found it after I called', you thought. One was from Dean and you clicked on it worried. "Jamie, it's me Dean. Sam... Ah... He's dying. If you get this I could really use your help with this one. I'll send you the coordinates to the hospital he's in. Jamie, I need you." without even listening to it any longer you dropped the phone unable to move, you froze in sorrow and guilt.
You dropped to your knees in shock and laid your head down. "I'm so sorry." you whimpered in sorrow. There were a few other missed calls that were from Lucas but unable to listen to them when a bright light glided through the air, you got up in a rush and ran with your head still throbbing.
"Sam." you shouted happy to see that he was awake and not possessed anymore well you were hoping when headlights flashed from outside the window and Cas went and checked worried while you helped Dean uncuff Sam. "It's Abaddon." Cas mentioned which gave you chills knowing she was the one who killed your grandfather.
It didn't make sense that she was back, but how? "Go. The back door. I'll handle this." Crowley said, you looked at Dean worried as he looked at Crowley not understanding why he would mention that. "Oh, 'Cause you're such a good guy?" Dean answered, unsure about Crowley.
"Right now, I'm the goodest guy you got." Cas lifted Sam and you helped, he seemed weak but you were glad that he was walking and his eyes were open which means that all things were going well but you still were not able to forgive yourself for what happened and the voice message from Dean. You trailed off out the back with Sam's arm around one shoulder and Dean following.
You, Castiel and the boys arrived at a long dock in the pouring rain. Cas slowly moved his hand over Sam's head and healed his wounds. Sam swayed uneasy. "You better?" he asked concerned.
"A little, yeah." Sam replied but you didn't want to get involved and you stepped aside as you looked over the dock, went over and tried to process what just happened. 'What a day.' you thought. "It'll take time to fully heal you. We'll have to do it in stages." you heard Cas mention. You glanced back at the boys. Sam nodded in agreement but kept looking over at Dean uneasy and Cas moved away towards you while the boys had their talk.
"Today was something." you mentioned to Cas, he looked at you even more concerned as if he knew what happened to you. "Yes. How are you Jamie?" he asked worried, you didn't want to answer since there was no basic answer to it and you felt your life was already messed up. "I've had better days." you said with a fake smile when Cas placed his hand gently upon your head concerned and you felt a sudden jolt. "You sick. The grace, you need to get rid of it. Metatron knew the consequence, but why?" he questioned.
You still had a headache from the wound, Cas noticed the pain on your face as he turned you around slowly to see the blood. "I'm taking longer to heal than I thought." you said amused but Cas just studied your wound before he placed his hand once again where the wound was, you let out a slight moan in discomfort. "What happened?" Cas queried but before there was even a chance to answer you heard the boys again but you seemed even more concerned about them and where they conversation might be led to.
"Come on. Can't you see? I'm... I'm poison, Sam. People get close to me, they get killed... or worse. You know, I tell myself that I - I help more people than I hurt. And I tell myself that I'm - I'm doing it all for the right reasons, and I - I believe that. But I can't - I won't... Drag anybody through the muck with me. Not anymore." Dean says strong with guilt in his eyes. Even though you had no say, you didn't believe one word that Dean just said, he was a hero in your eyes, Cas and Sam were too. You hated it...the way Dean puts himself down.
There was a moment of silence as Dean looked at Sam pleadingly. "Go. I'm not gonna stop you." Sam said with no sign of regret as you moved forward to try and stop Dean from leaving but Cas held you back. Dean's face fell in defeat and pain, he turned to walk away. "But don't go thinking that's the problem, cause it's not." Sam mentioned raising his voice as Dean walked off but he soon stopped without turning around. "What's that suppose to mean?" he queried.
"Just go."
Dean slowly walked off to the Impala as you and Cas went back and stood by Sam. He unlocked the car. "Jamie, I'll give you a lift to your car." he mentioned before getting in the car. You looked back at Sam and Cas with sorrow. You gave Sam a hug as he kissed the top of your head. "Take care." he mentioned. Cas stood there without a word before you went in for another awkward hug from Cas, he smiled and you walked off towards the car where Dean waited. He started the car as you got in, you glanced back leaving Sam and Cas in the rain.
Please comment and vote if you enjoyed (-;
I wonder what Metatron means by that? I hope that Jamie is prepared for the challenges ahead and she will be able to get better.
Mwah!