Hey, thanks for all the reviews. For theses wondering why Naruto faints so much it's because he uses a lot of chakra when he changes and although he has huge reserves he has next to no control. This means he wastes a lot and tires himself out. Hope that explains it. Let me know what you think of this chapter. :)
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Disclaimer: I own nothing :(
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They all just stared at the young blonde boy that lay on the floor in front of them. All had pale faces and some of them had been sick, but the shock didn't last long. Walking forward towards the decapitated head of their tormenter, Inari bent down and picked it up with trembling hands.
All watching thought he was about to be sick like so many others, but were surprised when instead he turned to the crowd, lifted the head in the air and yelled in joy. Soon others joined in and before they knew it they were all cheering and hugging each other.
While they celebrated the Konoha nin moved to look at the downed Naruto. He was breathing and if they didn't know better they would have thought he was asleep.
Haku was still alive, but hurt, from what they could see the arrow had missed her hart. Kurenai had applied a basic healing Jutsu that she had learnt to help stop the bleeding until they could get her properly treated.
Zabuza had sat up to watch the slaughter and they could see he was grinning through his bandages.
"To think, for years I thought I was a demon, this kid is something else."
Walking over to sit next to the missing nin Kakashi looked at the still cheering crowd.
"So what are you going to do now? You can't keep running, especially since the girl is hurt."
"What choice do I have? I can't go back to my village until that monster is dead and no other village would have someone like me, I'm wanted for trying to kill my Kage."
Something Zabuza said got the silver haired jonnins attention.
"What do you mean by that monster?"
"The Misukage went crazy and started killing whole families because they had bloodlines. My country is in the middle of a civil war. I was working as a missing nin to help the resistance, I've been giving them all the money I earned."
This surprised Kakashi. Zabuza, the demon of the mist, was trying to help people. Seeing the surprise on the man's face made Zabuza laugh.
"Look beneath the underneath, isn't that one of Konoha's favourite sayings."
"True, but for someone who killed an entire class of academy students, it seems odd that you would want to help anyone."
"And for someone that spends all their time reading porn you haven't been staring at any of the bouncing tits only a few meters from your face."
When he said this Zabuza motioned towards the crowd of villagers.
"How did you-"
"Your reputation precedes you."
They both laughed at that. Sighing to himself Zabuza turned to look at Haku on the ground, being tended to by Kurenai.
"I did it to prove a point."
Seeing the questioning look he was given Zabuza continued.
"Do you know what happened after I killed them all? They stopped using the traditions of the bloody mist. By killing those few, I saved hundreds."
Kakashi had never thought about that. It was true that after the incident with the young Zabuza they had changed the final exam.
"You could come back with us."
Both men jumped in surprise at the voice and turned to see Naruto sitting up and staring at them, grin and all.
"When the hell did you wake up?"
"Who said I was asleep."
"I really want to kill you."
"Join the club; I hear they serve dango on Tuesdays."
As the two continued to banter Kakashi decided to stop them before they destroyed anything.
"Naruto, what did you mean before."
Stopping mid insult Naruto turned to the masked nin and laughed.
"Section 42, paragraph 9 of the dealing with missing nin laws of Konoha state that in the case of a country in civil war a missing nin may seek refuge in Konoha and work out of the village until such a time as the war has been decided. He can come to Konoha and still be a ninja of Kiri."
Both men stared at the blonde in shock. Looking the boy up and down Kakashi finally asked.
"Where did you learn something like that?"
"I read the Konoha library."
"You mean in the library."
"No"
Without another word the blonde got to his feet and walked towards what was left of the thugs. The people seeing him stopped cheering to watch what he was doing.
Moving through the remains Naruto would stop and pick up a head or an arm and throw it into a pile. No one questioned him on this, just waiting to see what he would do. When he was done there were two piles on the bridge, one that was made up of the heads of the deceased thugs and the other of everything else.
Satisfied that he was done, Naruto turned to the forest and howled, no one seeing his face changing as he did. Within moments they heard a reply and turned just in time to see the seven wolves walking out of the tree line and towards the grinning boy.
The smaller of the wolves with the white stripe stepped forward and the two seemed to communicate. All any of them heard was growls. Seeming to be finished with his talk Naruto turned towards the villages, face back to normal. As he addressed them the wolves moved towards the pile of random body parts and started eating.
"Give them a rabbit a week each and they agree to stay and look after you."
None of them new what to say, it seemed too good to be true.
They quickly agreed and Naruto passed on the message.
Stepping forward Tazuna asked.
"What are you going to do with the ...heads?"
Narutos grin became sinister as he turned back to the other pile.
"Send a message."
XXX
And that's exactly what he did. For the next few hours Naruto walked around the village and placed each head on a stick. He did this until he ran out of heads and had surrounded the entire village. No one complain, and after a quick explanation from Kakashi they were actually glad.
It turned out that Naruto was performing an old ninja tradition. From what the masked man explained, Naruto was claiming the village as under his protection, meaning that if anything happened he was legally allowed to intervene. The reason he was placing the heads around the village was as a show of strength, showing others what would happen to them if they attacked. All that was left was for Naruto to make a signature and put it in the village. He did this by painting a smiley face on the village hall in red paint. The thing that made it stand out was that the smile was a grin that stretched across the whole face and instead of normal teeth it had fangs.
The idea was that as he became better known throughout the ninja world the safer they would be, and with the wolves moving into the area permanently they were sure that someone like Gato would never come into power in their village again.
Zabuza had thought a lot about what Naruto had said and agreed to come back to Konoha with them, mostly because Haku still needed medical care that he couldn't provide himself. She would be stable enough to move but they would have to be careful.
Sasuke had regained consciousness and was less then happy with Naruto, but was more then happy when he found out that his sharingan had activated. For the rest of the mission he could be seen activating and deactivating it to get use to how it felt.
The other gennin and Kurenai had been helping clean up the bridge and finish its construction, which had been speeded up by the workers Tazuna had lost coming back now that they didn't have to worry about Gato. When it was finished Tazuna had announced that it would be named the bridge of heroes and a plack was made with the names of all the people Gato had killed, including Kaiza.
The day after his death the villagers raided Gatos buildings and took anything of value. Expensive works of art, sake, anything that could be used was taken and the buildings themselves had been set up as temporary homes for those that had been living on the streets.
The night before they were set to leave for Konoha there was a huge celebration. The village was covered in decorations, from hanging lanterns to balloons of every colour. The air was filled with the sound of music and the streets were full of people. It seemed like the very air they breathed was full of joy and happiness and was spreading it around like a disease.
It was also on this night that they all learned a very important lesson, never let Naruto drink. They thought he was bad normally, but that was before they saw him drunk. It took a lot to get him drunk, he had drank about three tankers full of sake before he started acting strange, and by then it was too late. Kakashi and Zabuza had gotten the beating of their life's the next day for encouraging the blonde to drink so much.
Unlike most people when they get drunk he didn't get dizzy, he didn't slur his words and he was as aware of his surroundings as he was when sober. He did; however, seem to lose any sense of limitations he had, which until that night they didn't know he even did have. In one night he had painted the entire village bright orange, stole the clothes of every man in the village and replaced them with pink tutus, each with a small message on the back. Things like 'my other body is a temple' or 'takes five to party'. He dyed everyone's hair purple and used some type of permanent paint to paint all their faces like clowns. He had also super glued a rubber duck to Sasukes head.
When they found him he was upside-down in a tree hanging with a rope tied to his ankles, the only thing stopping them from seeing him naked the bandages he wore to cover his skin.
They had needed to stay an extra day just to get the village back to some semblance of normality.
When they did leave the whole village had gathered at the bridge to see them off, Tazuna, Tsunami and Inari at the front of the crowd. Both mother and son had tears rolling down their faces as they said there goodbyes. The only thing that stopped it from being a completely heart warming moment was that they had found out that Naruto had burned all the clothes he had stolen, meaning that all the men were wearing pink tutus. And they all still had the paint on their faces.
Throughout the whole exchange Naruto had never stopped giggling.
Just before they set out they all heard the howls of the wolves in the distance. They didn't see them, but they could all tell they were close. Stopping his giggling they all watched as Narutos face took on a more bestial appearance and answered the howls with one of his own.
After that they all set out towards Konoha.
XXX
It took a lot less time getting back to Konoha then it did getting to wave. Without having to pace themselves for Tazunas sake they could move at much faster speeds. They still needed to pace themselves because of Haku, but it was still faster.
Kakashi had sent a message ahead with one of his nin-dogs Pakkun, a small pug like dog with a Konoha headband tied around his head and a blue vest. The first time they had heard him talk in his deep tone Naruto had picked him up and started turning him over in his hands. When the small dog had asked him what he was doing the blondes answer was that he was looking for where the batteries went. This had sparked a small argument between the two as to weather Pakkun was a real dog or a toy.
When that was finally over Kakashi had given him a scroll to deliver to the Hokage, explaining about Zabuza and Haku so they wouldn't be killed on sight.
It took them two days to get back, and as soon as they were in sight of the village a full ANBU patrol surrounded them. One of them took Haku and disappeared in a shunshin while the rest stayed to escort them through the village. They received many strange looks as they were led to the Hokage tower, some people going as far as to point at them and laugh.
The reason for this was that the paint Naruto had used still hadn't washed off and Kakashi, Sasuke, Kiba and Zabuza were all wearing pink tutus. Lucky for Shino, he had been able to hide one set of his ninja clothes from the drunken Naruto.
The message on each of there backs seemed to inspire many a laugh from the people that watched them as they passed.
Kakashi's was 'pervert and proud'.
Sasuke's said 'I like ducks' with an arrow pointing up at his head.
Kiba had 'just got neutered'.
And Zabuza's was 'has anyone seen my eyebrows?'
By the time they got to the relative safety of the tower they were all glaring at Naruto who was close to rolling around on the ground in laughter.
They were both surprised and mortified when instead of being led to the Hokage's office they were taken to the council meeting room; the entire shinobi council was present. As they walked into the room they were met with stunned silence, but it didn't last long. As soon as she saw her son and the words on his back Tsume Inuzuka burst out into laughter.
When they had calmed her down the meeting started.
They explained everything that had happened on the mission, except the reason for their current state, and ended with Zabuza formally asking for asylum in Konoha for himself and Haku.
When they had finished Sarutobi stood up and addressed them.
"First of all, on behalf of all of us, I would like to congratulate you all on a successful mission, which due to unforeseen circumstances has been upgraded to A-rank. Second, we as a council except both you, Zabuza and your young charge into our village, provided you agree to a 6 month probation, you will be monitored 24/7 and will not be allowed out of the village during that time. Is that acceptable?"
Thinking for a moment Zabuza nodded his head.
"Very well, now there is just one more thing I would like to ask you. Why the hell, do you have your faces painted like clowns? And why, in the name of Kami, are you four wearing tutus?"
The six ninja looked at each other, then at Naruto, then back to the Hokage. Taking the initiative, Kakashi stepped forward.
"The night we were supposed to leave there was a small celebration, during which sake was provided. Long story short... Naruto got pisst."
The room was completely silent. Then all at once, they all started laughing, Naruto joining them, even the normally stoic Hyuga Hiashi was banging his fist on the table in laughter, much to the shock of his daughter.
It took them ten minutes to finally calm down and stopped laughing. Standing back up, Sarutobi turned back to the seven ninja in front of him, still giggling.
"I see... well that will be all, you can go."
Nodding there heads they quickly left, hearing the people in the room burst into laughter yet again.
XXX
The paint faded after a week, much to the relief of team 8, 7 and Zabuza, who had to walk around for a week looking like clowns.
Haku was doing well. The doctors were confident that she would make a full recovery and would be allowed to leave in a few days. Much to the relief of Zabuza, who had not left her side the whole time.
Also to the relief of Sasuke, not that he would tell anyone. He had been spending all his spare time with Haku, whenever he wasn't training he was with her and, because he never left, Zabuza.
Team 8 were currently at their training ground, working on teamwork. Kurenai had told them about the chunin exam the day before and they were all looking forward to proving themselves. They all signed the forms instantly and now had two months to prepare, and they weren't wasting a moment of it.
It was while they were training that something strange happened that, for once, had nothing to do with Naruto.
Out of nowhere a ball shot into the training ground and exploded. When the smoke cleared it revealed a large banner that was being held up by to kunai stuck into two separate trees. The banner read in large bold letters 'presenting the sexy and single Mitarashi Anko!'
They could all hear Kurenai grown in exasperation. Then a blur landed in front of the banner. Hinata's face turned a bright red and smoke could be seen coming out of her ears. Shino just stood there, not moving, but they could all see the blood stain that was growing on the front of his collar.
Naruto however just laughed at his teammates reactions.
Standing before them was a beautiful woman; she looked to be in her early twenties or late teens, had purple hair and pupil less brown eyes. But the thing that drew the most attention was the way she was dressed. She was wearing a tight mesh body suit and a burn orange skirt that barely covered her womanhood and over it was a light tanned trench coat.
All in all, she was hot and wasn't trying to hide it.
Smirking at the gennin she frowned when her eyes landed on Naruto. Walking up and getting right in his face her frown deepened and she turned to Kurenai.
"Hey nai-chan, your kid is broken."
Kurenai just rolled her eyes at her friend's antics.
"Did it ever occur to you that he just isn't a pervert?"
Anko gave her a blank look.
"No."
Turning back to the boy Anko walked in a circle around him, looking him all over. Naruto just stood their, giggling to himself.
When she finished looking him over Anko walked back in front of him and put her face inches away from his own.
"You gay?"
"Nope, you?"
Anko just grinned.
"Don't get fresh with me brat, do you know who I am."
"From the sign I would guess Mitarashi Anko, snake mistress of Konoha. If you're going to ask that question you shouldn't make a big sign with your name on it."
They could all see the tick mark that appeared on Anko's forehead.
"What would you know? When you're someone as great and sexy as me you need to announce it to the world!"
"But if that was true then why would you need to point it out to people, they should already know."
The two stared at each other for a long minute. It was then that Anko took notice of the kunai in the blonde's hands. It was longer then the normal standard kunai, and was made of a lighter metal. Trying to think of where she had seen it before it hit her like a ton of bricks.
It was hers!
Grabbing the kunai out of his hands and cradling it like a newborn baby, Anko sent a suspicious look out of the corner of her eye.
"When the hell id you take my kunai! And for that matter why didn't I notice!"
The grin that came over the blondes face worried even Anko for a second, but it didn't last long.
"Did you know you forgot to put on a shirt today?"
All those in the training ground except Naruto and Anko face faulted.
Turning to her friend again Anko very loudly asked.
"Is he an idiot or something?"
"I really don't know."
Turning back to the blonde Anko gave him another suspicious look.
"What's your name brat?"
Again, Naruto just grinned and pointed to her sign, which now read 'The Sexy and Insane Uzumaki Naruto' with a drawing of a chibi Naruto grinning and giving a peace sign. They all looked from the sign to the blonde several times, wondering when he had changed the sign.
Then, out of nowhere, Anko burst out laughing. She was soon joined in by Naruto. They stood there laughing for a good ten minutes, but what scared team 8 the most was the fact that Anko had a similar laugh to Naruto. It wasn't exactly the same, but it was enough for them to be worried.
Finally getting a holed of herself, Anko patted Naruto on the back.
"You're alright kid, hey nai-chan, why didn't you introduce us earlier?"
Shaking her head the red eyed jonnin locked a blank look on her friend.
"The Hokage, council and all the jonnin of the village agreed that it was safer for the village if you two never met."
Both raised an eye brow at that, and then grinned at each other. So people didn't want them to meet, this could be fun.
Getting a bad feeling Kurenai quickly changed the subject.
"So why are you here Anko, I thought you were working with Ibiki all day."
Facing her long time friend Anko pouted.
"Old scar face said I needed a vacation, so I thought I would come and see you."
Walking up to her, Anko through her arm around Kurenai's neck.
"Tonight me, you, Hana and your three brats are hitting the town."
Anko was curious when she saw three of the four people stood around her pale.
"NO!"
And was a little taken aback when they shouted at the same time, casting scared looks towards the blonde, who just grinned back at them.
"oook, that was weird."
XXX
They still ended up going out that night, even after they explained what had happened in wave. If anything it seemed to make Anko more eager to go. Hana couldn't make it so it was just the five of them.
Team eight kept giving Naruto worried looks throughout the night, counting how much he drank and ready to run the second he did something.
But nothing happened.
For the whole night Anko and Naruto could be seen laughing and talking. They had been thrown out of several bars for starting fights with other people, but nothing overly crazy happened.
The two talked and laughed long into the night, even after the others went home.
And the next morning the village awoke to the sight of the Hokage monument painted.
They had all been painted to look more real, but each had a little ...quirk.
The Shodaime had a picture of a naked woman next to his head and his eyes closed and a blush across his face. The Nidaime and Sandaime both had perverted looks on their faces and drool falling out of their mouths and the Yondaime was looking the opposite way at another picture of a naked man with a curious look on his face.
The villagers were outraged at the blatant disrespect shown towards the Hokage's and demanded that the ones responsible were punished. They all knew it was Naruto, and after Kurenai talked to the Hokage, Anko, but no one could find them. It also soon became clear that they had used the same paint Naruto had in wave. No matter how hard they tried it wouldn't come off.
Throughout the day several people were caught victim to traps set around the village, from pit falls to paint bombs. It took the ANBU most of the day to find and deactivate the traps.
However they didn't seem to mind it, when the Hokage asked them why an ANBU in a bear mask and a white hooded cloak answered.
"The fact that they got around us and set the traps shows we need to improve internal defences. If they were an enemy they could have planted exploding tags in stead of paint bombs."
Seeing his point Sarutobi agreed to let them rearrange the village defences so they could avoid it happening again.
But they still couldn't find Naruto or Anko.
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Hope you like the chapter. I've been waiting to bring Anko in for a while now and wanted to make it funny. Let me know what you think. :)