"What is wrong with Niall?"
That question was currently in each of the boys mind's as they sat on the couch, silently wracking their minds for an explanation as to why Niall had been acting the way he has, Looking for the simple reason that would have them laughing in the end because to the think they had been so worried about something so simple,"He's just not himself" Liam stated as he ran a hand through his hair, "I mean since when does Niall work out!?" He added, Harry nodded "Its not even an average workout I mean I had to take him off the equipment" he muttered recalling the events of the day previous, "Something is wrong" Zayn started, "He's always been thin but he's so skinny now he's just-" Zayn said struggling to find the right words to describe his friends sudden weight loss, "He's too skinny" he said after a moment of thought, "I should've said something when I saw it- I shouldn't of- Fuck!" Louis said angrily as he ran a hand through his hair, "What are you talking about?" Harry asked, trepidation evident In his voice, Louis sighed "I didn't know! I just thought it was a one off-" He ranted, only stopping when Zayn interrupted "Louis just spit it out!" He snapped, Louis swallowed nervously as he rubbed his hands over his face before continuing, "Awhile back I saw Niall on his phone-I don't usually check his phone I swear! It's just I was worried and then I picked it up and saw he'd been reading through his hate on Twitter" Louis stated nervously, the boys quickly silenced as they starred at Louis with matching expressions of shock before Liam's changed in to one of anger, "What the hell are you talking about Louis!?"Liam yelled as he shot up from the couch, Louis shifted uncomfortably under Liam's angry glare, "He was reading through his hate, Liam, I don't know what you want me to say!" He yelled, Liam starred "I don't want you to say anything now Louis, you should of told us this weeks ago!" He yelled as he stepped closer towards the older boy, "I told him not to look at that shit and that it was all rubbish, I thought he'd listen to me!" Louis yelled, guilt heavy in his chest because if his idiocy is the reason behind Niall's behavior he will never forgive himself, "You told him not to and you thought he'd listen!?" Liam scoffed, "Liam!" Zayn yelled as he grabbed hold of the younger boy, "Stop yelling at Louis! I know he should of said something but he didn't and it's no use yelling at him, It isn't Louis' fault, We don't even know if this has anything to do with it, alright?" He said calmly, Liam didn't say anything but let Zayn push him back down to the couch.
Niall woke up the following morning fully intending on heading to the gym like every day, but as soon as he stepped out of his room and into the kitchen he noticed something different, he wasn't the only one up, Louis was standing against the counter top with a look of concern on his face, "Louis? What you doing up?" Niall questioned as he made a grab for the cupboard and pulled out a glass, "Couldn't sleep" Louis replied shortly, Niall simply starred,you could every other morning he thought bitterly as he held the glass under the cold water with shaky hands, "Right I'm off to the gym now, so I'll talk to you later, Lou" Niall muttered as he turned to leave, Louis reached out and grabbed on to Niall's arm, "Your not going to the gym today" he stated calmly, Niall frowned "Why's that?" He questioned, "You can miss one day Niall" Louis stated as way of explanation, Niall starred about to protest but Louis spoke up first, "Would you like some breakfast, I could make you something?" He offered, Niall frowned Since when does Louis offer to make others breakfast? Realizing Louis was waiting for an answer he muttered a quiet "I'm not hungry" hoping to pass of as convincing only to be proven wrong when Louis continued to press the subject, "I could you make you some toast instead?" He asked as he turned to grab some bread, If niall wasn't confused before he certainly was now because what did he mean by instead that implied Louis was planning on making him something other then toast, What the fuck? "I'm honestly good!" Niall said, putting a hand up as if to convince him further, Louis simply nodded slowly, clearly not convinced, "I'll make you some toast" he concluded, leaving no room for a debate.
Louis carefully placed a plate of toast in front of Niall who was reluctantly sitting at the table, "There you go!" He stated before taking the seat opposite and beginning to eat his own, Niall simply starred at the food in disgust, he couldn't remember the last time he felt hungry, well that wasn't exactly true he could remember feeling hungry but he couldn't remember the last time he actually ate when he wanted to, Only ever allowing himself 500 calories per day, if he ate at all, Looking over to Louis who was content eating his toast, without a care to the amount of calories he was consuming within every bite, he wasn't exactly envious of the older boy he just wished he was good enough so he didn't have to worry about calories and weight, but he wasn't, And until he was, he would happily do whatever it took to get perfection.
Louis looked up mid chew to notice Niall starring at the plate, "You alright, mate?" He asked, Niall looked up "Oh yeah, I'm good" he muttered, Looking in disgust at Louis' plate which was completely empty, the only bit being left was currently being shoved in his mouth, "What you starring at?" Louis asked jokingly, Niall shrugged, you stuffing your face He thought bitterly, but instead settled with a simple shrug, "Niall can I ask you something?" Louis asked after an awkward moment of silence, Niall frowned "Yeah if you want" he said, sitting up straighter to appear more interested in whatever it was the older boy wanted to say, Louis swallowed, "Niall, remember that time I came in and-" Louis was cut short by Liam's voice as he entered the room, "Good morning-Niall? What you doing here?" He questioned as he glanced up at the clock, because shouldn't Niall be at the gym?, Niall spared a quick glance at Louis before muttering a quiet "I should be", Louis starred at the younger boy, realizing he wasn't going to expand any further on the subject, he spoke up, "Niall decided he'd stay today" he stated, And Niall immediately looked up because he most certainly did not say that!
Soon all four boys were sat around the table, eating away at their breakfast while Niall sat awkwardly at the end of the table fidgeting with his hoodie, Looking up he realized Louis was starring directly at him, once he caught Niall's attention he raised his eyebrows slightly, a silent Are you okay? In which Niall responded with a quick nod before abruptly standing up from his seat as he made his way back to his room throwing a quick I'm just going to get something over his shoulder, absolutely no intention of coming back.
The boys looked up at the blonde as he hurriedly exited from the room, "Is he alright?" Harry asking, looking over to Louis for a response, "I don't know, seemed pretty quiet" Louis muttered as he looked over to see Niall's plate of toast which had long since gone cold, completely untouched, "He didn't eat his toast?" Zayn questioned as he followed the direction Louis was looking at, "No he didn't" Louis muttered, "Do you want me to bring him a new piece up or-?" Zayn asked, Louis shook his head "No, he's alright, if he's not hungry, he's not hungry" he stated, frowning because Maybe he always skips breakfast and heads off to the gym and they just never noticed?
It was about an hour later when Niall was in the midst of some crunches when a sudden knock sounded on the door, "Niall, you coming?" Harry's voice asked from the other side, "I'm busy" Niall muttered as he continued doing his exercises, "You said you'd come back" Harry stated, Niall rolled his eyes "Like I said, I'm busy" he said, not caring how harsh he sounded, he was trying to count how many he was doing while having a conversation, it weren't exactly easy, "We want to watch a movie" Harry said as he knocked once again, Niall stopped his exercise and sighed heavily, if that was meant to be tempting it failed dramatically, "Good for you!" Niall snapped harshly, "You could choose it?" Harry added as he knocked again, Niall rubbed his face with his hands as he staggered to his feet, "If it will make you go away" he muttered as he made his way towards the door, reaching for the wall when he felt his head spin, "I'm coming" he muttered as he opened the door,excepting Harry to smile or something not gasp, "Niall? Are you alright?" Harry rushed out as he placed a hand on Niall's bony shoulder, Niall frowned because What the fuck? "Yeah course!" He said, smiling to reassure him further, "Your white as a- Are you out of breath?" Harry asked frowning because what on earth was he doing, Niall starred "I did some- exercise" he muttered, "Are we watching a movie or what?" Niall asked quickly changing the subject, "Why were you doing exercise?" Harry asked concern evident because how obsessed was he? "I didn't get to the gym this morning" Niall stated matter of factly, Harry starred "That's a bit extreme, don't you think? Your not that fat!" Harry joked, unaware to the fact that as soon as the word fat left had left his mouth the blonde went completely silent.
Niall was sat on the edge of his seat and it certainly wasn't due to the gripping movie which Niall had long since forgotten the title of, it was more the fact that he was beginning to feel sick, ignoring the fact that his current headache probably had something to do with fact he hadn't actually eaten anything Niall continued feigning interest in the tedious fight scenes until he felt a nudge on his arm "Do you want some?" Zayn asked as he nudged Niall's elbow with the bowl of popcorn, Niall starred "Nah I'm good!" He muttered, looking away because just the look of the food let alone that disgusting sweet smell was making his headache worse, "Come on!" Zayn coaxed pushing the bowl closer towards the blonde "You know you want some" he added in a sing song tone, Niall simply closed his eyes and put his head in his hands because all of a sudden everything was beginning to spin and it most certainly had something to do with the fact Zayn was currently trying to shove the bowl in to his ribs "Can-Can you just stop" Niall muttered quietly, Zayn seemed to notice the younger boys discomfort and was quick to put the bowl on the coffee table, "Niall?" Zayn asked concern evident in his voice, "I'm fine,just a headache" Niall said, voice coming out muffled, "Do you want anything for it?" Zayn asked apologetically, Niall shook his head, "I'm good" he muttered, "What are you two doing over there, your ruining the movie!?" Liam stated from the other couch where he Louis and Harry were sandwiched together, a bowl of popcorn balancing in the middle, "Nothing-" Niall started but Zayn cut across "Niall has a headache" he stated calmly, hand resting on Niall's shoulder in what was supposed to be a comforting gesture but Niall wanted nothing more then for that hand to move of his body before Zayn felt his disgusting- "How about we have some lunch?" Liam suggested, the boys all quickly muttered their agreements or simply nodded,Niall however remained silent, Maybe they won't even ask me? He thought stupidly, hoping to appear invincible as he sunk further down the couch, "Niall? Do you want something?" Zayn asked and Niall forgot he was seated right next to him, Niall shook his head "I'm good, thanks" he said flashing a smile in hopes to appear more convincing, Zayn simply starred before turning to the other boys "I think we're all pretty hungry!" He stated, "No I'm fine" Niall protested, because what bit of I'm good didn't they understand? "Well I'm starving, so we're eating" Louis said and Niall may or may not of been paranoid but he could've sworn Louis had directed his words at him.
Niall didn't know what to do, he was panicking, it had never went this far before, usually a simple I'm not hungry was suffice but for some unknown reason none of the boys were buying into his lies today, Niall was currently stood awkwardly by the counter top attempting, failing, to convince the boys that he really, really was not hungry, he'd tried the I'm feeling a bit sick actually, but that didn't work because Liam simply stated how food would do him good and Niall had to physically stop himself from slapping his face because Why did he have to have such a sensible answer to everything? He then tired the I already ate but Louis had simply laughed and told him he'd been sat with him all day and what did you eat? Invisible food? It's not like he hadn't tried, he'd tried till he was practically blue in the face but nobody was listening.
Niall starred at the steaming plate in front of him, then he starred at the other plates, why the fuck did he have way more than anyone else? "I give you a little more" Harry said obviously guessing what niall was thinking, "you were looking a bit pale" Harry added and Niall just starred because how does giving a fuck load of food help the color of his skin! "Thanks" Niall muttered awkwardly, "This is great, I'm starving!" Zayn stated and Niall simply starred, starving, he couldn't remember the last time that word had been literal to him, or Maybe he could but he just doesn't want to.
Niall was cut from his thoughts by Liam's voice, "You ok Nialler?" He asks and Niall simply nods, "Eat up then!" Liam smiles as he taps his fork against Niall's plate, "You'd like it" he adds as he continues to eat his, Niall nods because he would like it, of course he would, but that's not the point, he can't eat it, Niall doesn't care about the fact he hasn't eaten in- well, he can't actually remember but he's alright with that because he loves it, the feeling of Emptiness, the feel of control, it's way better then any food could make him feel.
Niall's so consumed in his thoughts that he barely even thinks before he's picking up his water and spilling it over his dinner and all over his over sized hoodie.
So consumed in his thoughts that he misses the look on Harry's face, misses the fact that Harry had been silently watching him the entire time.
I'm so sorry for taking a god damn month to update, I had some personal things going on but here it is at last, I hope it doesn't disappoint! :) I will be doing the next part tomorrow! I hope you enjoyed it! I just noticed that one minute they were eating lunch and the next it was dinner! Oops!