I stare into the darkness. I can feel Preston's body heat radiating out from where he lies on a mat next to me.
I can't sleep.
I've been here for eight days.
In that time, I've met the whole town, and gotten a boyfriend.
And still I'm worried.
I don't know what I'm worried about. We're safe here. Choco's told me that several times, he's showed me the defences we have. Thick wooden walls all the way around the village, the two entrances closed at night.
I can't stop thinking about the boy.
I was the last, they said.
Nobody else would come.
And yet, that day, that day he woke up and remembered me. And I couldn't. I know he's important. I know I should be able to recognise him.
And yet I don't.
It's so frustrating! Nobody in this village remembers about before, and yet we still hold the ability to talk, to read, to fight. Rob's been teaching me to fight better with a sword, but there's still a technique there, I can feel it. I've learnt to fight before.
But where? And with who?
Preston says its time to focus on the now.
We can't afford to think about what happened before, we have to focus on surviving now.
I feel safest with him. He was the one who helped me, when I woke up, alone and confused. I stumbled blindly along with him, and then... three days ago...
He kissed me.
I still don't know how I feel about it.
I-I look up to him. But I just don't see... I don't see that spark in him. I don't see what I saw that day in the other boy's eyes.
That hope, that kindness.
I crushed him. I know that. I destroyed him by not remembering.
I couldn't help it.
He ran.
He ran when Preston walked over. Kissed my cheek.
That boy is probably dead now. At night... Things get tough here.
He's probably dead because he ran from me. From the village. Why did he run?
He gave up hope. I gave up his hope myself.
I can try to pretend I don't know why. But I do.
That boy loved me, and I loved him back.
But now...
What do I do?