A/N:
All Jin based super long chapter bc why not? (Have I mentioned how I love Jin?)
The next few chapters are gonna be based around Jin because I have a big ANGST STORM arriving soon to do with him, so I want some fluff before that. Dil will return in a chapter or two dw)
xx
Jin's insomnia got the best if him. All night, his overworked brain had him twisting and turning, the gears practically rotating as so many thoughts raced through his mind.
What should he do?
Should he tell Kei?
Surely Kei deserved to know and as a friend he should, he would forgive Dil for being drunk, right?
But what about Dil? Would Dil be mad if he did? What is Dil never spoke to him again for telling on him?
It was as if choosing between two precious friends, not wanting to lose either of them. His eyes stung as he shut them, not have been able to put his mind to ease all night meant that his body was overworked.
Everything felt like a dream in a way, the way he yawned as the sunlight peaked through the curtains of his room, blinding him felt illusory.
Jin stumbled out of bed, heart aching as if someone was hitting it with a giant hammer from the inside. He had only drunk water that night, but the guilt was eating him up from inside.
He hadn't done anything wrong, had he?
Surely not, he pushed Dil away...
Maybe he should of pushed him away more, otherwise Dil wouldn't have done...that.
Jin flinched as a thought passed his mind.
Was this considered cheating for Dil? He hadn't been in a full relationship like this before so he didn't know the do'd and don'ts or the exception rules. Maybe they depended in the couples.
Was this okay? Wait if this makes Dil a cheater does that mean Jin is his accomplice? Jin was pulling at his brown roots now, biting his lip. He had never felt this much anxiety in a while.
He needed to tell someone but knew if he said a word things would turn bad. But what were he to do?
Could he possibly tell someone? Maybe someone neither of them knew, someone whom wouldn't tell a soul and could rely on them. Then it struck him. His close friend Ludus. He never really got to see him since he lived a few hours away but they would Skype every two days having grown up together. They were inseparable.
Jin hadn't calls Ludus, in a while due to being busy. The last time he had called was maybe two weeks ago. Jin shakily unlocked his phone, gripping it tightly in his sweating hands.
He called Ludus, hearing the ringing causing his heart to speed up. He knew he could trust Ludus, but the concept of talking to someone about this felt weird. Normally he didn't have to, since he never felt like it got too severe.
Ludus answered the phone after two rings. "Agape love." He answered the phone in his usual monotone. "Hello love, nice of my baby to call."
"Hey Ludus." Jin smiled sadly, having missed his friends' happy tone.
"I can't hear a smile in your voice, what's up snowflake?" Ludus asked, referring to Jin with one of his many nicknames, this one corresponding with Jin's dark blonde hair.
"When's the soonest I can possibly see you?" Jin asked. "I'm driving myself mad by myself I need to talk to someone."
"Could you possibly come visit me? You can stay over for a week or so, however long you like. Unless you want me to come to you." Ludus said quickly, shuffling could be heard from the other line.
"I'll come to you. How soon?" Jin said breathlessly, rubbing his stinging tired eyes.
"Next train leaves in thirty minutes, can you pack quickly?"
"On my way." Jin said hurriedly, hanging up and getting to work.
**
A few hours later Jin had arrived on the doorstep of his friends' apartment building after walking up the long flight of stairs with a small suitcase. His hair was still a mess as he somehow managed to fall asleep without realising on the train, strands sticking up in all different directions. His attempt to pat them down failed as the door was opened, met by a grinning face. The man before him, Ludus had tightly curled hair flopping on his forehead like a fringe, the sides a lot less curly. His eyes sparkled hazel, matching his tanned complexion and tall lean body. Ludos had his shoulder against the doorframe, smirking at the shorter boy before him. He simply opened his arms without a word, causing Jin to timidly shuffle forward and wrap his arms around his middle section, face hiding in the other boy's neck.
"Oh you smell nice." Ludus inhaled. "Smell like your natural scent."
"That's never not creepy." Jin smiled, still hugging Ludus tightly.
"When am I ever not creepy?" He asked rhetorically. He pulled apart from the hug, taking Jin's small suitcase and dragging it into the apartment, leaving it in the hallway.
"Spill the beans Mr. I made some green tea." Ludus took the cup resting on the table, still hot and gave it to the blonde-haired boy.
"I feel like I'm about to burst." Jin huffed, taking the cup thankfully, sipping at it and sighing.
"That's the most sexual thing I've heard someone say in a while." Ludus muttered mindlessly. "What's got you torn bunny? What's on your mind? Why are you so...apprehensive, all your jerky movements are hurting my eyes...another sexual thing I haven't heard in a while."
Jin felt a small smile crack onto his face. "I see you haven't changed one bit."
"And I see you haven't grown one bit. What's up doc?"
"Well my...m-my...um..." Jin stuttered.
"Spit it out. Again with the sexual innuendos I can't stop myself-"
"My co-worker tried to kiss me." Jin interrupted.
"Great!" Ludus exclaimed with a smile.
"He has a boyfriend."
"Shit."
"He was also drunk."
"Double shit." Ludus thought to himself. "Makes sense why i sensed the agape tendancy. Do you still remember those?"
Jin nodded. Ludus was Greek, and was also really into Greek mythology. He studied it with so much fascination, especially Greek Love. There were 6 types of love, each meaning a different kind. Agape as far as Jin remembered was love for everyone.
Ludus loved to sense and somehow guess everyone he met's love they were feeling.
"Agape is love for everyone, an act where it is selfless." Ludus said quickly, hands fidgeting unable to keep them still.
"So, I presume it's Dil? Poor sweetie, you told me he's as innocent as a flower." Ludus said thoughtfully.
"H-He really is! But I'm so torn. I want to tell Kei because he deserves to know but isn't that betraying Dil?" Jin said quickly.
Ludus patted Jin's shoulder. "Does the chap remember?"
Jin paused. "I don't know."
Ludus got up , inching closer to Jin and cupping his face. "Poor baby your face is pale. Worry about this Kil and Dei situation later, take care of yourself right now."
"Dil and Kei." Jin corrected with a small smile.
"Your so small and fragile still. Your hairs gone thinner, you were pulling it weren't you? You promised not to!" The other male said softly, hands massaging Jin's head.
Jin instantly melted at the touch. "I'm sorry."
"Stay for a week okay? You can borrow my clothes since I presume you haven't packed nearly enough. Poor angel." Ludus sighed.
"Agape." Jin guessed. "Philia?"
"Philia means deep friendship, I guess you could call it that. But not agape, I only care for you." Ludus smiled at Jin guessing what type of love he was feeling right now.
"I love your smile." Jin said gazed at Ludus' face, eyes tired and heavily dark circled.
Ludus smiled. "I love your face. Now tell me about Dil, is he cute? What about Kei? I heard Kei was hot."
Jin shrugged. "They're perfect for eachother really, Dil's cute but actually strong, and Kei's like an eagle, he seems cold but is actually cute once you get to know them. They're opposites in a way."
Ludus hummed in response, massaging Jin's head more, causing Jin to shut his eyes and let out a soft whimper
"I think...you won't be able to relax until you sort this out. How about staying a day and then I go back with you to help sort this out? Your anxiety is through the roof I can feel your tenseness. Relax your shoulders"
Jin obliged and hummed in response, eyes still closed. "Okay. Love you."
Ludus smiled sadly at the younger boy. "I love you too flower."
xx